I'll Stay

Ch.23

(This chapter is talking about their trauma and them opening, so you better get them tissues out)

Now Valen and I are just talking about  anything and everything, both now laying on his kitchen floor disregarding our supposedly 'pasta'. I know weird, but fuck it right ? I now know his favorite color is Grey, he's close with his Aunt and sister and his birthday is on February 10th.

"My Aunt is just an angel from heaven, when my dad ran out of us.. she offered to take me and my sister in because she knew her sister and how she gets. I declined because even though I knew how our mom was, I didnt have it in me to leave her. I couldn't do that to her.

So we stayed with that woman for 4 more years. Living every single day in fear and torment. I had to juggle taking care of June, Myself and her all at the same time. It was just too much for me to handle. I was her punching bag and got beat by the woman who calls herself my mother nearly everyday, and even after every beating I still loved and cared for her because I knew she was lost and just needed help. This one night she lost it and tried to put her hands on June and that where I realized that she's gone absolutely mad and she was in desperate need of help if she could even think of laying her hand on a 5 year old little girl. I called my aunt the same night but of course not before my mother got to me first letting all her anger out on me.

But hey I got a sick new scar in return." He says lifting up his shirt with a sad smile showing the same scar I had seen the night we kissed. My eyes water now knowing the meaning and reseaon of the scar

"We left the same night and never turned back, I haven't spoken to my mom for about over a year now. I do miss her, but she isnt ok. We sent her to facility that can hopefully help her. After the hell she's put us through, there isnt a bone in my body that hates her.

I don't think they'll ever be, because I know behind that abusive alcoholic was once a happy woman who wouldn't lay her a finger on a fly. Was a woman who smiled over every single thing, and laughter filled everyone's ears. Was a woman who loved her friends and family dearly so dearly that she would go to war for them. If she was once here then I believe she can come back." A tear slides down his face.

I shift to him whipping the tear with my hand, "I've never met someone so selfless and so understanding in my life. Even with the hell you've been put through in this life, you find a way to help others in need and put a smile on my face. I will never understand how you do but one thing that I do understand now is that, I can trust you and that you won't hurt me." I looks into his eyes meaning every word that leaves my mouth. I want to be totally transparent with him.

I take a deep breathe in, "When I was 5 my mom was diagnose with leukemia. She suffered for 4 years until she was put out of her misery. I watched my own mother slowly die in front of me having no way to help her no power to stop the pain she was going through.

For 1,461 days my mom suffered not knowing when her last breathe would be. Every day was a reminder that she wasnt getting better. But she never let that get to her. She put on a smile everyday, and acted like she was ok for 5 year old me, but everyone knew she wasnt. It was one of the hardest thing to go through. Everyday I'd wake up in sweats having nightmares of my mom dying until one day that nightmare became a reality.

One of the worst days of my life. The day of it she looks surprisingly healthier. She held my hand and told me she was going to be fine and that she was going to get better. She told me she loved me and my dad very much and said she wanted to take a nap. She closed her eyes breathed out and that was her very last moment on this earth.

The the monitors started beeping repeatedly and fast. I was scared and started shaking her to wake up, begging her to just open an eye, but she never did. I'll never forget the look on my dad's face when he found out the love of his life had passed away, and I'll never forget the faint reassuring smile that was left on my mom's face."

I try to contain myself while speaking but this is never going to be an easy topic to talk about. It wasn't easy then and it isnt now. "Its ok to cry Novah, you've bottled up so much. It's time to let go." Valen pulled me in a hug, he didnt need to say anything else.

A tear turned into two and before you know it and I was sobbing on Valens chest not being able to even breath properly because of how hard I was crying. He let me get it all out while comforting me in silence.

I've never felt so vulnerable in my life and for once I didnt mind. My walls were completely down right now and it felt good to be open with Valen because I knew I wouldn't get judged. He ran his fingers through my hair and held me tightly with the other arm."I'm not going anywhere Novah, I hope you know that." I nod sniffling not being able to speak at the moment.

My mom was someone very dear to me, I hoped to see her at my graduation. I hoped to see her crying at my wedding. I hoped to have her beside be while giving birth. I hoped my child would have a great bond with their grandma. I had imagine a future that had my mom in it and it really fucking sucks that all that isnt going to happen.

Its okay though, I'll be okay. "You're going to be okay Novah" Valen tells me.

This chapter was mainly about them opening up to eachother, maybe not about everything but about a lot. Thank you for reading this chapterrr, cant wait to see yall in the next chapter. Dont forget to vote please, love yalll

Xoxo