That's A Filthy Habit

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Painstakingly I make it though the dinner with Ted, thankfully having learned a lot and built the start of a rapport together

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Painstakingly I make it though the dinner with Ted, thankfully having learned a lot and built the start of a rapport together. He'll be with me the first two races of the year to show me the ropes and make introductions. And of course, for his self proclaimed "legendary" retirement party in the party capital of the world in Australia. 

It was hard to not allow myself to be distracted by the handsome devil across the room. But men come and go, successful careers stick around. I reminded myself of that over and over again as I refused to glance back at him once, even though I could practically feel his gaze burning into me.

One thing I know for sure: the sexual tension between us in unlike anything I've ever felt before.

As I walk alongside the beach to the yacht club I debate on telling him my real name. But if I admit to Amelia, I'll have to admit to my last name to. A last name that matches the one on the car he drives. There's no telling how he may react.

Besides, I have Jay. Charles is just a hookup... a really good one. Jay. Fishing my phone out of my pocket, I try again to phone him. It's near eleven here so it's got to be near five for him.

Ring.. Ring.. Ring.. Ring... Ring... I end the call with a sigh. I don't even know what I'd say in a voicemail to him at this point. Today brings the tally to twenty one total days without a connected phone call. Why am I even in this relationship anymore? It seems silly to break up a multi year relationship over text I suppose. And is that really what I want? Or am I just caught up in my short term affair?

I don't know anymore. Heavy sighs fall out of me and I lit up other joint for the last piece of my walk to calm my anxious mind. A few puffs in, the questions about Jay fade away as the beauty of the moon dancing on the water dominates my thoughts. I'm so near the boats now and can only assume the only one with lights on the deck is Charles. It has to be right?

"Ciao?" I call out, planting my bare toes on the steps tentatively.

Nothing. Please please don't let me be walking into a strangers boat I silently wish in between puffs. Smoke session finished, and still no answer.

Maybe I should just go. Better to escape before this goes any further. He's going to find me out eventually. A lie is a lie and honestly, do I really see this ending well?

"Piper?" Charles calls out from behind me.

Oh shit. Yup, definitely not the right boat. Laughing at the near miss I dismount and head to his boat across the way.

"Ciao," I greet him with double kisses, the joint having melted away a lot of my anxieties from his touch "Nice boat. Love the black."

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