C. 26

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I'm sorry for taking some time to post this time.. ! But here I am! 

Thank you always for reading, commenting and voting. Maybe Carina will answer some of your questions in this chapter... or maybe not!


Four years is a very long time for everyone, but in my life so twisted by changes it is as if they were equivalent to at least a decade. I have changed so much, in everything, in the last four years of my life: I had a daughter, thanks to whom I improved the relationship with my brother, and for whom I modulated my work. After a period of leave at work, in which I moved to Florence, where I gave birth to my daughter, away from everyone and everything, I returned to Rome and my place in the hospital was waiting for me. I didn't really know how to manage everything on my own, however, and luckily the director of the hospital came to meet me, offering me the spot of Head of Department. Now I have a role of greater responsibility, I see much more bureaucracy than patients, but I have almost fixed shifts, I only do one night a month and I can manage my daughter with more tranquility. So far I have brought her here to the nursery of the hospital, but these days she is doing the insert to the kindergarten. I am so proud of her: she is a lively, intelligent and sensitive child and despite all the difficulties I am happy to have had her.

In these four years, not a day has passed in which I didn't think of Maya. The end of our relationship was so confusing and so sudden that I still don't know how it was possible. Certainly, the fault is mine, because after a brief contact, I disappeared and even if I know that she has been looking for me for a long time I have never been found again. How did I explain to her that I had had a baby girl? Surely, I did not expect that I would see her again at my workplace, as a patient, moreover in a coma after a motorcycle accident. A thousand questions crossed my mind in those moments: from the most banal ("Does Maya have a motorcycle?") to the most difficult ("Does Maya ever thought of me?". The common thread, however, has always been Maya.

It was magical that she woke up right in my presence, but it was almost impossible for me to reach her later: things between me and Andrea, her best friend, are certainly not easy, they have not been for four years or so, but I can't tell Maya everything. Especially not at this time when she really needs the support of her loved ones to be able to recover. However, I could not resist the idea of being able to meet her again at her request. I certainly did not expect her to ask me to participate so actively in her life: I do not know if she had a double purpose, perhaps at this moment she cannot even think about it, I only know that my life now has such a large load of responsibility that I cannot throw myself dead weight on her even if I would like to. I have to think about my daughter, however, and our family serenity. Yet I could not resist Maya's eyes asking for my presence and today I am here, at her first physiotherapy session.

I am punctual, as always, indeed five minutes in advance and while I wait in the hallway, already outside the hospital gym, I am joined by Amelia.

A < what are you doing here?> she asks me suspiciously and I sigh. Instinctively I would burst into tears, but I hold back.

C < last night I saw Maya ..> I admit, hearing her swear in all languages. < Amy, I know, I was wrong!> she looks at me and shakes her head.

A < you know what I think. I'm sure you're still crazy about each other, but this isn't the time, Carina..>

C < I'm not here for what you think ..I can't, I have a daughter..>

A < and does she prevent to love?> she asks raising an eyebrow.

C < I'm not here for that!> I snort. < she asked me to be there, without ulterior motives, and I want to do it..> Amelia nods.

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