Just me & you (G!P)

C. 25 M's POV

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The lights are blinding again, the machines emit annoying trills that I now hoped not to have to hear anymore. I feel the wheezing, the mouth still dry. I'm cold. I'm always cold. Why doesn't anyone understand that I'm cold? I squeeze my eyes more because now I don't want to wake up. Not hearing all these mixed voices screaming next to me. I am quite lucid, however, too lucid and I recognize the voice of Andrea and that of Carina arguing, touching decibels that are impossible for any place, let alone for a hospital room.

I do not quite understand what they are saying, but I perceive a lot of anger, the word "guilt" and also the word "bitch". I would like to snort, I would like to make myself heard and above all I would like to tell them to stop, because I have a headache and because I do not want the people dearest to me to quarrel. My head bursts even more when I remember what happened just before dark: a small, but determined little voice shouted "mom" for Carina. What have I missed in these years of her life?

Luckily Amelia interrupts the flow of my thoughts and also the flow of the fight, putting an end to the discussion by slamming them both out of my room. They complain, especially Andrea, but then Amelia asserts her role as a doctor in charge of the patient, that is me, and both leave, leaving around me a bit of well-deserved silence. A silence always interrupted by the very sharp noises of the machines.

Still with my eyes closed I speak.

M < can you not lower the volume of these machines?> I ask and hope that Amelia has mercy on me. I feel her hand caressing my forehead and I strive to open my eyes, finding myself in front of her bright and sincere smile.

A < welcome back ... again!> I smile just nodding. Amelia momentarily detaches herself from me and really, fortunately, lowers the volume of the machines that have tied me with an infinite number of wires and electrodes. When she comes back to me, without talking, she begins to take exams, to which I obey just as silently. When it ends, I take the floor again.

M < what happened to me?> I ask and she smiles at me.

A < you had a heart attack ..> I look at her, infinitely surprised: is this the effect of a heartbreak surprise on my poor heart?

M < can I drink?> I ask and she goes out of her way to help me.

M < now how am I?> she smiles.

A < better. You have finally woken up, but you should tell me how you are .... and above all the cardiologist will tell us, who will soon come here to you ..>

M < so I filled up with specialists ..> Amelia laughs and nods, then looks at me with affection.

A < I'm glad you're here..> I nod and there's a tense moment of silence.

M < so is she a mother?> I ask and she knows very well who I am referring to. She lowers her face and says nothing, so I insist. < you can tell me..> she shakes her head.

A < no, Maya, I can't because it's not my story to tell..> I sigh heavily and a part of me knows she's right.

M < can you get her to come here?>

A < Maya... I don't think it's good for you. You need some stability before you can meet her again..> I snort.

M < is it Andrea's bullshit? By the way, thank you for making them stop, my head was popping up..> she smiles and nods her head.