The Secret The Cheerleader Doesn't Know

Mother, Daughter

Jaelynn POV

I was breathing heavily, barely holding myself up when my phone rang. The caller was mom, so I ignored it. Leaning down, I kissed Peter again and we were about to continue when my phone went off... mom.

"Answer it," he huffed, holding my hips in place, "we can continue after."

Frowning, he leaned up to kiss me as I reluctantly rolled off of him to pick up my phone, "Hello?"

"I'm five minutes from Peter's house," she said.

Sitting up, I panicked, "What? What do you mean?"

"I'm turning down his street right now," she said.

"How did you get his address?" I asked, getting out of bed and running into the master bath.

"You left it in my office remember," she said. I cursed my past self for that dumb decision, "I'll see you in a bit."

"I need time and don't come up to the door!" I shouted, terrified she would see Peter naked.

"Why?" She said, "It's two in the afternoon."

"Cause... because I was busy with Peter!" I blurted it out, turning beat red.

She was quiet for a bit, but then said... her voice wobbling from laughter, "Okay... I'll go get us a coffee and come back... that should be about twenty minutes... ha!" And the call ended... leaving me to scream in embarrassment.

~

When I opened the door, mom was standing there with a big ass smile, "Hey... I gave you an extra ten minutes."

"Shut up!" I snatched the coffee from her and walked inside.  Peter had left five minutes before she came... because I was so embarrassed and needed him out with her here.  We into the living room, her stopping to look at Allie's pictures.

She picked up one of the frames. Allie was holding a tiny bear when she was an infant. She was all wrinkly and chubby... I love it. When she put it down, she looked at the other photos of her, "She's beautiful."

"She takes on her biological mom's appearance," I said, "but she has Peter's red cheeks. She loves the color orange now... even chugs orange juice."

"No more pink for her," mom joked, but I was shocked that she remembered.

I felt a tad bit... sad. She was so interested in Allie - which I'm happy about... but she never showed that interest in me or the twins. Clearing my throat, I moved over to the couch, "What do you want to talk about?"

"About us," she said, placing back another frame, "I want to hear what you feel."

"So you want to give me a therapy session?"

"I want to have communication with you," she corrected, finally turning to look at me. She was wearing her usual black ankle-length skirts and a white blouse. Her bangs pulled back by clips and white chucks on her feet. "I want to fix our relationship."

Biting on my lip, I said, "I already said we wouldn't have a relationship."

"You said that in the context of me and Cassie getting a divorce," she said.

"Which can still happen."

"You're not wrong," she walked over and took a seat in the loveseat, "but I don't want to lose my connection with you, no matter relationship I have with Cassie." She looked me in the eyes this time, "I love you Jaelynn... I know I haven't been an attentive, understanding, and emotionally supportive parent. I know I'm dismissive, stubborn, rude, and irrational at times. I know I've hurt you, in many ways. I know I have put you in situations where you were acting as the twins's mother. I know I forced you to grow up quickly and to emotionally support Cassie when I was absent. I know I've made you worried, sick, and have betrayed you... I know I was being selfish... I'm sorry for all those things and more. My words, due to me going back on them often, mean little now and now I must show you through action - so I'm here trying to do that. I want you to tell me what you've been feeling, don't hold a single thing back. Let it all out on me. Bury me with your anger, hatred, sadness, frustration, pain and more. Burn me with it, because that is the least I can do right now."

I just... stared at her. Completely in awe... registering everything she said. It was... odd. Her being vulnerable... opening herself for me to see... I wasn't prepared for it. Taking a sip, I cleared my throat, "Was I mad? Yes. Was I hurt? Yes. Did I react in a way to hurt you? Yes. Was it right? No... I... I don't need to burn you or bury you with my past emotions... I'm not like that I guess.... I guess... I just wanted you to apologize and mean it."

Now she was in shock as well, "You don't want to scream or shout at me? Insult me or tell me what I did wrong?"

"Do I need to? Do you need me to do that?" I asked, but she shook her head, "I love you mom and yes, what you did in this past year we awful and disgusting... but I also behaved awfully and disgusting. I don't want to nail you to a cross for the past and I hope you don't want to do that to me."

"I don't," she said.

"So I guess we're better now," I said, getting up to grab the box from my closet.

"Are you sure?"

"Well I'm still on edge and so are you, so we just need time to pass is all," I stepped in front of her, holding out the present, "but I love you and I accept your apology. I'm sorry for hurting you as well."

She glanced between the box and me, "You got me a present?"

"Well... I planned to just leave it at your door," she took the box from me and I walked back to my seat. Wrapping myself with a blanket, I couldn't help but grin as I watched her unpack it.

She pulled out the small piece of clothing and stared at me with wide eyes, "No."

"I'm graduating this semester and I was going to wait until then... but I think it's better to say now," I smiled, "how does it feel to be a grandma?"