Only a matter of time

The talk

YOUR POV
The rest of the week went by in a blur. I spent most of my time trying to keep busy. I decided to take another trip to see Mags again just for myself. Sleeping wasn't really in my agenda because I was sleeping alone for the first time in months. Mags gave me some tea to help with the insomnia and a few spells books that Wanda and I read together. Natalia must've needed a lot of time because she hasn't come back and her birthday was in about 3 days. She never left my mind even when I tried to find a way to not think about her. Maybe I wasn't what she needed? What if we weren't soulmates after all? I decided to pick up one of my ancient history books about supernatural beings and found the love section. There were sections about each supernatural being do I skimmed over it all until I found Vampires. It states, 'Your rationality will leave your body when it comes to them. They make your heart beat even when you don't physically have one.' Well so far this states that she's my other half but half of it isn't going to cut it. After feeling a slight relief I found the Witches section. And it reads as, 'You will create a connection with them to where you may speak telepathically. But you can't access any other part of their mind. It strengthens the bond the mind has created by not allowing any shortcuts to love.' This was just fucking great. I've waited over a thousand years for Natalia and she doesn't even want me back. I didn't even realize I was crying until a tear fell on one of the pages in front of me. Quickly I wiped the tears from my face slamming the book shut and throwing it across the room. I threw my sweatshirt off leaving me in a T-shirt and shorts and ran towards the training room. "FRIDAY lock down the training room and initiate Hulk protocol." I stated trying to take a moment before self destructing. "Yes Ms. Y/n. Would you like me to inform Ms. Maximoff when you're finished?" The AI called back. "Yes please." I responded. Before I knew it I was breaking everything, tearing everything apart screaming. Every punching bag was torn apart and the boxing ring was nothing but scraps. Every dumbbell was bent a weird way or stuck in a wall. Everything I've had built up inside just released all at once and a golden explosion filled the room and everything was turned to nothing in a matter of seconds. "Ms. Y/n, should I inform Ms. Maximoff now?" The AI chimed in again. "Yes." I breathed out exhausted. The reinforced doors unlocked and opened and I started crying uncontrollably on the ground. About 5 minutes of just letting everything out Wanda came rushing in. "What the fuck happened here?..." She spoke to herself. "I couldn't take it anymore. I needed to let go before I hurt anyone." I said robotically. Wanda quickly rushed to me and pulled me into the most genuine hug. "I love her more than I can ever explain Wanda. In my entire existence I've never felt this way about anyone." I sobbed into Wandas shoulder. "I know Y/n... you will get through this. Even if it means you'd have to wait 1,000 more years." Wanda whispered to me. "If neither of us are married to anyone in the next 10 years can we be there for each other?" I whispered just enough for her to hear. "I doubt it will come to that but I wouldn't want to make a promise like this with anyone else." She whispered back while rubbing my back. After about 30 minutes I stopped crying all together and felt lighter but still very upset. "I'm going to tell Tony he needs to get a new training room. Thank you for everything Wanda." I stated while getting up. "Of course. We witches need to stick together." She said with a smirk. "You're so weird." I shot back playfully. "Well who else would be weird besides you." She joked while getting up herself. "Shut up." I scoffed. "Let's go color in your room." She pleaded hoping it would help put me in a better mood. "Let me talk to Tony then sure." I stated sighing deeply. "He'll understand. Now hurry up before you get all the bad pictures to color." She teased while running off.

NATASHA POV
This past week and a half have been absolute hell. Y/n had called me once to talk and she just told me to take as much time as I needed and that she loved me. I have no clue what I'm doing. No one has ever showed me this type of love before and I'm still very unsure on how to handle it. Even Bucky wasn't as complicated at this, that was probably because I didn't love him like that. Y/n made me feel incredible and indescribable feelings. At the same time she worried me all the damn time, she can't really die but I never know if one day we find out that something besides a wooden stake can kill her. Also I'm not sure if I'm ready to give up on living a normal life ever again by becoming just like her. All I've ever wanted was to have a normal life and settle down and have children but that's out of the picture for both of us. Laura asked me what I was so afraid of? I was scared that one day Y/n would fall in love with someone else while I grew old. We can't even become and old married couple. I feel like I'm wasting precious time by standing in her way with someone else. My insecurities could become a reality in a matter of seconds and I'm not sure its worth the heartbreak in the long run.

THIRD PERSON POV
Natasha had come back the day before her birthday, April 11th 2015. The team knew the tension was thick as soon as Natasha entered the building. Y/n wasn't in a good place and it had started to affect everyone. Luckily Y/n was out when Natasha came back and to her surprise she found that all of Y/N's things were gone like she had never even been there. Except for the photos that Natasha kept by her nightstand. Natasha decided to stay in her room for a while and what she didn't know was Y/n had come back preparing herself to sit and talk with Natalia. Y/n calmed herself and gained the courage to go knock on her used to be room. Natalia opened to door to reveal an anxious brunette staring at her. "Can we talk?" Y/n finally spoke after sitting in a tense silence for a moment. "Yes. Can we go down to the lake and talk? More privacy." Natalia answered back. "I was actually going to suggest that." Y/n nodded. They both walked in silence out to the lake that was just behind the compound. Y/n decided they had walked far enough and sat in the grass and gestured for Nat to sit next to her. "I just want to apologize for running off before and not letting you explain." Y/n blurted out. Natasha seemed stunned that the woman was apologizing for something she thought was a very valid reaction. "It's ok Y/n... I want to apologize for not explaining and leaving." Natasha sighed. "It's ok." Y/n responded. They both seemed to not know where to even begin and sat in silence again. Finally Y/n decided that she just needed to let everything out, "I love you more than anything in the world. You are my soulmate and complete me. I should've waited for a better moment to ask but also been patient with you. I just didn't want to wait any longer because I realized that this could be stripped away from me in a blink of an eye." She gestured towards them before continuing. "I'm sorry for not considering how you feel and being selfish. I have never wanted anything more than you... I want to spend eternity with you which is why I was hesitant to ask you if you wanted to be like me. I would've never pressured you into it but it's an option that I want you to think over. Because once it's done it can't be undone unlike marriage." Y/n finished while mentally praising herself for being honest. For a moment Y/n was panicking because Natalia hadn't said a word because she didn't want to break Y/N's heart as well as her own. Finally Natalia composed herself and took a deep breath before saying her peace, "Well Y/n you mean the world to me. I've never felt like this with anyone before or love in general. So I'm scared. I have no idea what I'm doing, all I know is that you make me feel indescribable things." Natasha breathed out while Y/n was trying to keep her heart for bursting out of her chest. "But. I want a normal life like Clint. To settle down and have children even though I physically can't. If I become like you we can't become an old married couple and we would constantly have to hide from the world because we would always look the same. Let's say I do marry you and I turn and become a vampire what if you fall in love with someone else because of how long we've been together? Now I can't go back and grow old with the team. I don't want to have a heartbreak in the end and have it not be worth it." She finished up while letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding. Y/N's heart was shattering slowly and she felt like she was slowly dying and it was a such a crushing feeling on her heart but she didn't want Natalia to feel guilty for being honest. "I respect your choice. But I will never love anyone the way I love you." Y/n stated softly. Natalia's heart was breaking as well and she never knew heartbreak was something someone could physically could feel. It felt like someone's hand squeezed your heart to where it was almost going to pop but ripped it out instead. "As much as I hate to admit it we were destined to fail from the beginning, it was only a matter of time before we realized it. But I will never stop loving you." Natasha said shakily while trying to hold back tears. She had started to fidget with the heart locket Y/n gave her for Christmas that she never took off along with the arrow necklace Clint gave her. "So this is the end?" Y/n chuckled nervously. "Yeah I guess it is." Natasha chuckled back. Y/n decided to take the small object out of her pocket and hand it to Natalia. "It's a promise ring I was going give you on your birthday tomorrow. But since there's no more us I want you to have it as a reminder that I will always love you no matter what." Y/n placed it in Natasha's palm while letting her tears fall. "Y/n I can't..." Natasha sobbed. It was a golden ring that engraved said, 'Only for you, always...'. "Just keep it in case you ever change your mind." Y/n stated looking into Natasha's beautiful emerald eyes she could never get enough of. Both women leaned into one last kiss that had passion and sadness in it and it was one last desperate thing they both needed. They both pulled away even if their hearts were telling them to stay. Y/n gave one last look at Natalia before getting up leaving two broken women.