Sitting in the parking lot of the hospital my head rested against the steering wheel as I cried. These last couple of days have been the most sad and depressing moments of my life. If I wasn't at school or at the hospital I was in my truck crying my eyes out that's the only time I could have a moment for myself, a moment to think. I refrained from seeing Tai and Riah because I knew they could lighten up my mood and for some reason I don't feel like I deserved happiness.
Everything was going so good and everybody was so happy I didn't think something like this would happen to us. I know Ice has done bad things and nothing will ever excuse his behavior but, I love him and I want him In my life forever. This shit doesn't feel right, him laying in a hospital bed connected to a machine doesn't sit right with me.
My mom.
How could this happen? Why did this happen to us? Every time something good is happening there's the devil taking it away. I wasn't going to allow him to tear me apart though, no, absolutely not.
"Your strong, your beautiful and your smart" I sniffed before looking at the window, gripping the wheel. "No weapon formed against me shall prosper" I took a deep breath and wiped my face before getting out and making my way to the entrance. After being situated at the front desk I walked to my mom's room and smiled when I opened the door, seeing her asleep.
Grabbing her hand I sat on the bed and rubbed my finger over her knuckles. She was getting better they were able to remove all of the bullets and they said she would recover sooner rather than later, which was amazing. I couldn't say the same for ice he was shot three times. One in the stomach, thigh, and back. The one in his back couldn't be removed sine it was so close to his spine they didn't want to mess him up or anything. He had some internal bleeding that they were able to stop by the grace of God.
I wiped my nose and put the back of my hand over my mouth, whimpering quietly. I was an emotional wreck and being pregnant made it no better. Sadly, my pregnancy couldn't even bring me joy. Slouching over I covered my eyes and ignored my ringing phone it was probably my father. He was calling and texting me everyday about my mother. As much as they argue and claim they hate one another I couldn't tell.
"Yea" I answered the phone and sniffed.
"I'm just checking on you and your mama, how y'all doing" I shrugged my shoulders like he could see me.
"Not so good daddy" my throats began to burn and my eyes watered from wanting to be held and told everything was going to be okay. I just want everything to go back to normal. That's the problem though my life wasn't normal and it hasn't been for a long time.
"Listen, I wanna come see y'all but I don't know if y'all are comfortable with that" it was like he was asking me instead of it being a statement making me smile. As much as I despised him he was still my father and I was grateful for him and everything he was trying to do.
"Please" I said desperately. "Please, just come be here with us"
"I'm on my way, baby" my shoulders jerked as I silently cried so I wouldn't wake my mother. "Amora" he sighed.
"You hear me"
"Yes" my voice cracked.
"I love you princess" I stood up and walked out the room, closing the door behind me.
"I love you too" I squatted on the floor and hung up the phone before putting the phone beside me, ignoring the footsteps I heard inching towards me. The sides of my arms were grabbed and I was pulled into someone's chest. I didn't know who it was but did I care? No, because I really needed this, I needed to be held.
"Everything gon be good lil one" I only heard this voice once and it was shocking that he was the one holding me. "Imma make sure the nigga that did this to ya mama and my brother don't live to see another day, you hear me" I hugged him back and nodded my head.
"Chill out on all that crying you got one on the way right" I looked at him and nodded my head. "So you gotta calm down man all that crying and shit ain't good, Ight" wiping my face I smiled. Cedric and ice argued almost everyday about everything but I wasn't surprised that he told him about the baby that is his older brother.
"I didn't take you as the sentimental type" I said with raised eyebrows.
"I'm not, but my brother knuckle head ass really care about you so that mean I'a do everything in my power to make sure you straight and the baby" Nodding my head I took a deep breath.
"Go in there with yo ol'girl imma go check on him and tell em' you made it" he nodded his head towards my moms room before beginning to walk away.
"Cedric" he looked over his shoulder.
"Thank you" smiling he nodded his head towards my moms door again before walking away, going into ice's direction.
