Alexis
Will was the right choice. I won't go running after Harry. I won't I won't I won't.
My Mum had a habit of repeating things to herself when she walked around the house, always checking of her mental to-do list out loud. I would just laugh and snicker as she scurried around like a crazy woman. She was constantly reading manuscripts, more than one at a time, so she'd run around trying to find one, reciting the plot line just so she'd remember. If she didn't remember the plot, it wasn't worth reading, and sure as hell wouldn't capture anyone else's attention.
Every time I'm with Will I can't help but think about Harry, constantly thinking of his smile, taught body, the way his hair fell. He was always on my mind. Whenever I was with Harry, though, Will never came to mind unless I realised the bad I was doing. Will wasn't worth remembering when I was with Harry because Harry was the one I wanted to remember, to always be on my mind, close to my body and in my heart. Will was a bad manuscript and Harry was a best seller.
Today Will wanted to go over to my parents house. He was giddy and running around his flat getting ready. He hadn't ever been excited to be meet my parents, usually just panicky and worried they'd hate him. Today was different. His demeanour had completely changed. He'd woken me up by kissing me full on the lips, then dragged his lips down and over my collarbones and chest. I won't say I hated it, because I certainly didn't, but the thought of Harry now never doing that to me pulled at my gut.
The house was right in front of us, covered in vines and these little purple flowers that bloomed. The white paint that the house was originally covered in peeked through certain breaks in the vines. The black door stood out against the soft colours, gold door knob twisting slightly as Mum appeared on the other side in her pencil skirt and 'publisher's blouse', as she called it. She opened her arms up wide to Will and I, gesturing for us to come in and give her a hug. I'd missed her. My busy, loving mum. The one person I'd always love.
"I'm blind," she said, dramatically placing her hand to her eyes. She was referring to the gorgeous white gold ring on my finger.
It did stand out, and it was beautiful, but I knew that out of all people, my Mum never focused on materials and possessions. I mean, this little house that her and dad had always lived in was tiny, way under what they could pay for a house. Mum and Dad could live right in the centre of London in a two story house and still have money to spend at their leisure. But mum wasn't like that. She liked her tiny house, small rooms and cream carpet that ran from the bottom to the top of the house. She liked the tiny study she had, full of novels, most now spilling onto the floors as none fit in the bookcase anymore.
Will and my Mum had walked off further into the house and down into the sitting room. Will's suit button up was tight on his skin yet still gave me something to ponder on. I knew what was under there, a pristine, toned body. Nothing like Harry's, tattooed and like a painting. He followed my Mum until they were seated in the old, brown suede chaise that was so weathered and over sat in there were placed where the material had worn away into a lighter shade of brown.
My brother, Jack, lay back in a tired position on the couch opposite mum and Will. His daughter Mona lay down on top of him, sprawled out just as tired. He lifted his head slightly and looked at me, giving me a half-assed smile and wave. He then placed his hands down on Mona's back and closed his eyes, obviously ready to sleep.
Mona was three and Jack's only kid. He was a single dad, lawyer and totally over thrown with work and fatherhood. I don't think I've seen him fully rested unless at Christmas, which is when he can take time off work, come down to mum and dad'- as do I - give the responsibility of Mona to Mum or I and then go sleep for a few days. Neither Mum or I liked seeing Jack all worn out. All he tried to do was be there for Mona while also trying to get ahead and successfully in his work. So we take Mona of his hands and let him be alone for while.
Everything about this sitting room at the moment is normal; there's a fire going, Mum's searching through one of her smaller bookcase's in search of a book (probably for Will) and Jack's laying dead on the couch with Mona being a sweet little angel. One thing's missing, though.
"Where's dad?" I ask. He barely ever missing me catch up with me, always keen on talking and talking for hours on end.
"He's at the hospital. Had a surgery last night and says he doesn't want to leave the patient until he's fully recovered from the operation, which he says is going to be nearly impossible," Jack says in a coherent mumble.
"What happened to the guy?" I ask. Dad was a good surgeon, always performed amazing operations, but rarely had an unrecoverable case.
"His meal was spiked, apparently, in a restaurant downtown. Fancy one, at that. I was going to head down and see if he needed a lawyer if he woke up. Maybe see if he had family around that want to talk to me," Jack says. He slowly lifts a sleeping Mona off his lap and then lies her down on the couch. He comes over and hugs me.
"He'll need some proper food. I'll come down. Will and Mum can take care of Mona," I say. I just want to get out of the house. I can't watch Will and Mum get along so well when I know Harry would have been Mum's soul mate - non-romantically, of course.
Jack nodded, then decided to stupidly yell to Mum, "Mum, we're off to Dad! Hey, Will." He waved at Will. Mona started to wake with a stir, but Jack decided he might just leave before she could cling onto him again.
"Alright," Mum waved us off.
***
"What's up with you?" Jack asked.
I brought my eyes from the city passing next to me to Jack. He had his eyes on the road, fists clenching at the steering wheel.
"What's up with you?"
"You first. Don't fuck around. Something's wrong. What is it?" He quickly darted his vision to me before back to the road.
"Well you have to tell me yours after, okay?" I barter.
"Yeah, okay."
Jack had always been on the receiving end of my stories. We used to sleep in Mum and Dad's room with Mum when Dad was on call for the night. We always stayed awake longer than Mum, which meant we used to talk and talk and talk. Jack had always teased me about my problems and I would ask him about his crushes, blah blah. It just happened to be that from all that talking we did as kids, we never really did stop sharing as adults.
"I'm in love," I say. He laughs next to me.
"Duh," he says. "You're engaged, Alexis. I'm surprised you've forgotten. The ring on your finger must be heavier than Stone Henge."
"Not with Will," I say quieter than before.
Jack looks at me, for longer than a second now because we were stopped at light.
"With whom then?" he asks.
I'm happy with his un-judging tone. "He's called Harry. He's a writer. I met him at the start of the year at his signing. He started writing this book about a girl called Alice - a character he based of me - yet she wasn't anything like me, and kept confusing me for her. One night he said 'Goodnight, Alice' instead of 'Goodnight, Alexis' so I stormed out. He came to my door a week or so later, said he loved me, I turned him down. The night I got engaged to Will I walked to his house, kissed him, basically had an affair with him for a few weeks but never had sex and now I'm in a right slump."
Jack huffed next to me. "I'm not cut out for this type of drama, Alex."
"Neither am I! Just help me decide."
"What? Help you decide between your fiancé or your lover boy writer? No. You do it."
Jack may always listen to my problems, but he was a total ass when it came to the advice side of it. He hates making deacons with or for me, even if I have him the power to. He thinks everyone should make their own decisions. He's very passionate about that idea, seeing as he didn't really have a choice i'm having Mona, and at the time he didn't need a child, nor was he planning on having one, but now that he has Mona he's happy as ever.
"Alright, seeing as your no help with my problems, tell me yours."
Jack hesitates. His brown hair is falling over the front of his face, limiting his vision of the road in front of him.
"Alex, push my hair out my face, would you?" he asks.
"Make a decision for me." I'm going to push his boundaries, and I'm going to make it hard.
He hates having his hair in his face. He's constantly saying, "If my hair didn't make me attractive as hell, I'd shave it all off," only for me to say, "It doesn't make you look hot as hell," and then he'll tap the back of my head, pushing it forward.
"No! Alex, I don't want to have a car crash!" He's really and scary serious. The last time I saw him like that he was yelling at his assistant because he didn't know what to get Mona for her birthday, which was a massive over reaction.
"Just tell me your quick, short opinion."
His hair starts to fall over his eyes more, basically blocking all vision he had, only little slithers of sight available to him.
He gives up, yelling, "Alex, I don't have time for your problems. Liv wants to see Mona and I can't keep her from doing so. Please, please, just let your love life slide for a moment and push my hair out of my face!"
I push myself in the confines of the seatbelt and push his hair off his face. He's never snapped at me like that before, but I can understand why. Liv - or a Olivia as Mum, Dad and I call her because the bitch doesn't deserve a nickname - was Mona's Mum and Jack's ex-wife. Well, not ex-wife just yet. Olivia's dumb. I'm not going to be a softy about it because she really is. She says she's not cut out to be a Mum, but that she love's Jack and doesn't want to leave him, but sees no other choice but. She wants to be with Jack, but not Mona. She dreaded every moment of her pregnancy and ran away to who knows where the second she knew Jack would be okay with Mona.
"Why does she want to see Mona?" I ask.
He shakes his head, laughing in almost disgust. "She says she's ready to be Mum."
"Don't let her," I say.
"See Mona? She can see her. But I'm getting divorce papers written up at the moment and I said that I want full custody of Mona. She can hide a lawyer - which she can't afford - and take it to court if she wants shared custody of my girl."
I was proud of him. He's fighting for what he loves and he won't let anything take her from him. He's passionate; he won't let go. In many ways, I'm the opposite to my brother, this being one of them. I can't fight for things, not matter how passionately I feel for them, I let them slip through my fingers just so I do the right thing. By my age, my brother was married, had a little girl on the way and had just been promoted to partner at his law firm and was earning a ton. He was the perfect child, but now his life was going down the drain because stupid Olivia was walking straight back in.
***
As we pulled up at the front of the hospital, I saw someone I didn't need to see, but deep down really wanted to see. Harry. He was running frantically into the hospital in running shorts and a grey hoodie. His hair was wing pushed back by the wind as he whipped through people, trying to manoeuvre his way into the hospital.
I got out of the car, dismissing my brother for the moment, running after Harry. I probably looked stupid, dodging all these people. Harry hadn't looked stupid; he was the most beautiful man I'd ever seen. How could he look bad?
I see his figure ahead and I speed up quickly. I just need to grab out and wrap my hand around his arm; I just need to know he's okay; I just need to see him this one last time and see if that magnetic and electric feeling I get when I'm around him was truly how I remember it.
I'm only half a meter away before he stops. He turns around slowly and I see his flushed face, his pink, perfect lips and the worry in his eyes. I don't feel the electric, magnetic feeling, I feel something someone feels for the person they love when they're in distress; I feel hurt - with him and for him. His face looks blank and sad.
He relax's slightly in his frozen position. He quietly whispers, just to himself, yet I don't think he realises I can here him, "No way."
And as if irony is making fun of me, I hear that voice in my head, repeating that phrase I told myself to remember: I won't go running after Harry. I won't I won't I won't.
(A/N: Ahhhhh, a chapter update! Thank you so much for 2k reads! This is actually insane... Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. Also, new character's! I'll tell you that I imagine Paul Wesley as Jack and Olivia Palermo as.. well, Olivia. Don't forget vote and maybe comment? xxxxxxx)