*.☽.*
He took me to sit on the chair before wrapping a towel around me. I couldn't stop crying and I already felt my body shaking because of the cold. He took another chair and sat in front of me as he brushed the hair away from my face.
"Baby, I'm really sorry."
It was the first thing that he said after staring at me silently for a couple of minutes while I looked back at him, still sobbing.
"Seeing you this way..." He let out of what seemed to be a regretful sigh as he bent to cover his face with his hands, his elbows on his knees.
He looked as devastated as I was. When he straightened up his posture and faced me once more, I could clearly distinguish the tears from the water dripping from his wet hair.
"I shouldn't have let you go a while ago." He added, remorse evident in his tone. "Watching you leave drove me crazy mad. I couldn't even think straight for one second. I wanted to stop you, so bad..." He trailed off to take a deep breath.
He lifted his both hands to brush his hair away from his face.
"Damn." He hissed, momentarily looking away as I watched how his hands formed into fists on his lap.
It took about a couple of seconds before the look on his face transformed into something else.
Despair.
"But I also wanted to give you the space that you wanted." He stated, his head titled down. "I stayed in the car for a few minutes. But then, I kept convincing myself not to follow you to respect your decision but I could only hold it for so long before I decided to follow you."
The moment he met my eyes once more, my heart wanted to get out of my chest, it was beating so loud. It hurts to see him this way. I knew he already felt so bad about what happened and I didn't seem to know how to make it better.
"I wanted to make sure you were safe and I didn't care if you're gonna get mad at me for doing it. So, I tried to look for you but I was too late. I couldn't find you anymore." He paused to place his hands over mine.
His hands, despite being wet, still brought that familiar warmth.
"I looked for you anywhere, every street, I wanted to get out of the car and get in to every café, every corner but there were too many..." He said breathlessly before pausing.
His sentence was left unfinished but I knew what he meant. But somehow, I still didn't have the right mind coordination to answer, nor even make a sound. The look of pain on his face was making me feel worse.
"I said I wouldn't hurt you." There was still an ambiguous anger but evident remorse in his voice. "But it's what I exactly did."
The glisten present in his eyes right after saying his last statement left a pang in my heart. And suddenly, I couldn't seem to afford not holding him. So, without wasting any time, I pulled him into a hug.
Silence was what came after.
No wanting him to hear any of my sobs, I bit my lip.
***
9:34AM
As expected, I woke up the next morning with a terrible headache. I groaned in pain, as soon as I was conscious. And with my eyes still closed, I brought my hands to my head.
You're never gonna drink again, Park Hae Won.
I silently scolded myself as I finally struggled to open my eyes and instantly realized that I was in his room. I rolled to the other side of the bed but it was empty. My thoughts immediately wandered to his whereabouts. I got off the bed wanting to look for him. I slightly winced as soon as my bare feet made contact with the cold floor because for some reasons, it triggered my headache.
Ugh, this is unreasonable. I grunted.
I walked towards the door but stopped as soon as I passed by a full length mirror. I was wearing his grey shirt which was of course way too big for me paired with a navy blue plaid pyjamas.
I couldn't remember changing into his clothes last night. I closed my eyes and tried to recall but the last memory I had was us talking by the pool. It's weird. It's strange not being able to remember what happened. And maybe I forced my brain so hard, my head ended up hurting again. Not that it went away anyway.
I gave it up. I decided to just ask Baekhyun about it later.
But first, I need to find him.
I went out of his room, walked through the hallway and stopped on my feet when I was about to take the stairs. I heard voices talking but it was inaudible. I looked around, trying to determine where it's coming from. It took me about a few seconds to know where the sound was originating, his study room. My feet, having a mind of their own, walked towards the room on the right.
My heartbeat was starting to race as I neared the ajar door. My brain crammed as I was finally able to recognize Baekhyun's voice but still couldn't make out of his words. I stopped right in front of the door and about a second after, as if getting my rational senses back, I turned around dismissing the thought of eavesdropping.
"No hyung, tell them to fuck off!"
I almost jumped, stopping on my feet. I closed my eyes, my hands on my chest. I was so surprised by the volume of his voice.
"That's not gonna happen!" He said once more with the same amount of rage in his tone. "No one is telling me what to do."
There was a brief silence and I kept convincing myself to walk away but my feet seemed to be glued on the floor.
"I understand how mad you are right now, Baekhyun but we need to think this through. You gotta calm down."
I was a hundred percent sure that it was Manager Kang.
Silence. I could imagine Baekhyun taking a deep breath.
"From what I found out, Publisher Kim must've known about this all along." Manager Kang added. "I heard she was the one who contacted Ara and told her about your leaked photo with Haewon a couple of months ago."
"What?" The disbelief on Baekhyun's voice was so evident.
"I'm not sure but it seemed that she was the one who convinced her to come back and help out with the mess. I wouldn't be surprised if she was the one who pushed about you and Ara's photo shoot."
"Damnit!" He hissed. "I asked her to clean the mess not to make something worse out of it."
I was startled when I heard a loud thud, it must be his fists on the table or something.
"So, you're telling me..." It was Baekhyun. "You're telling me that this was a set up? That Ara kissed me on purpose and that someone was ready to take a photo of it?"
"Most likely." His manager's answer came is quick.
"Damnit!" He hissed once more, this time louder. "How could I be so stupid?! I can't believe I let them play me. Fuck!"
I heard his heavy breathing as I tried to keep mine steady as well.
Publisher Kim and Ara?
"Hyung..." His voice has softened. "All I want is to be with Hae Won..." I heard his footsteps. "Why does everything have to be this complicated? Is it wrong to fight for something that makes me happy?"
There was a quick pause and it allowed me to feel something gripping my heart.
"I love what I do but why does it seem like chasing after my own happiness is a crime?"
He took a deep breath.
"What did I ever do to them to treat me this way?"
Betrayal. I knew it was what he was feeling as of the moment, or maybe something more than that. He had worked with Publisher for the longest time.
I couldn't imagine how hurt he must be right now.
"How's Hae Won?" Manager Kang asked, probably wanting to distract him.
It hurts to listen to him talk about what he wants like this.
"She's not fine." He answered in a disheartened voice. "After looking for her everywhere last night, I found her outside the house...drunk." He sighed gloomily. "She's not fine Hyung. She kept telling me she is before passing out last night but I know it's not true...I wanted to punish myself for making her feel miserable. She didn't deserve any of this....I have put her through a lot already. And I can't stop hating myself for it."
My heart continued to sink.
Oh Baekhyun.
I knew he must have been feeling guilty but hearing this confirmation straight from his was just excruciating.
"You never wanted any of these to happen." The elder reasoned out. "And I'm sure she knows that."
"Yes but seeing her suffer because of all this mess..." He paused.
I listened to the loud beating behind my chest as I waited for his next words.
"Sometimes, I wished she never met me instead...in that case, she wouldn't have to deal with all these controversies."
If I hadn't met him...
If I didn't...
I can't even process what he just said.
Was it possible not to meet him in the first place?
Do I want it that way?
I blinked my eyes a couple of times, then tilted my head up to fight the formation of tears in my eyes.
"But I can't imagine my life without her." Baekhyun voice filled my thoughts once more.
I lifted a hand to my chest as if my whole composure depended on it.
"And I know I might be selfish but I'm going to fight to keep her in it. I can't lose her. I'd be damned if I do."
I bit my lip.
A tear successfully escaped and rolled down my cheek.
I wished I would run out of tears.
I'm tired of crying.
"I know Baekhyun." Manager Kang replied.
A few moments of silence took place.
"What are you gonna do now? The photos are everywhere."
"I don't know. I honestly don't know yet. But I'm going to do anything, everything to make this right. I have to tell everyone that this is nothing but a misunderstanding as soon as possible. They have to know that I am not in any sort of relationship with Ara anymore." His voice sounded so determined.
"I'll have a meeting with the entire team."
"Make sure Publisher Kim isn't a part of it." He added. "Tell her to look for another artist to work with or else she's getting sued."
I could just imagine how his jaw clenched while saying it.
"What about Ara?"
"I'll talk to her. She either has to fix this or I'll do it...and she won't like how I'm going to do it."
I shivered at how he said it.
"Baek." Manager Kang said, his voice sounded worried. "I promise I'll see what I can do to help you out... I know a lot is going through your mind right now, but try not to do anything reckless. It's too risky. We have to be careful. Your reputation is at stake."
I haven't heard any word from any of them the next few seconds. Then there were footsteps nearing the door, I panicked but it was too late for me to even move a muscle.
The next moment I knew, I could already feel someone standing right behind me. I slowly turned around to check who it was, my heart pounding behind my chest.
I held my breath when I saw Manager Kang's profile. He looked as surprised as I was before an apologetic expression took over his face.
I gulped as my throat seemed to have run dry.
I neither know what to say, nor what to do.
"Hae won..." He uttered before he tilted his head down to acknowledge my presence.
I hesitantly did the same thing before he walked passed me. He must have been caught off guard as I was.
I stayed on my spot for a couple of minutes before I heard some movement inside the room. And as if my body got the signal, my feet hurriedly walked as fast as I could.
I went back to his room, stood right behind the door for a brief second before lying on the bed.
Ara and Publisher Kim?
Ara and Publisher Kim?
Ara and Publisher Kim?
I couldn't even get my brain to process the thought. Why would they do this to him?
Is it a crime to fight for something that makes me happy?
Why does it seem like chasing after my own happiness is a mistake?
I felt my heart sinking, recalling the hurt in his tone.
Then I thought, if I hadn't showed up in his life, would all of these happen?
I closed my eyes for a few seconds wanting to divert my attention to something else when I heard the door opened.
Baekhyun. I knew it was him but for some reasons I didn't open my eyes and pretended to sleep. I didn't really know why I had to do that.
I felt him climb on the bed beside me and the next thing I knew, he was already brushing my hair with his fingers.
"Hey baby, wake up." He said, gently.
No more pretending, I thought.
I opened my eyes and looked up to meet his eyes. My heart almost melted at the sight of his eye smiles.
How is he even smiling like this after what he found out?
God, Byun Baekhyun. Stop trying to make me feel better.
It hurts how he had to keep a straight face in front of me.
"How do you feel?" He asked as he planted a quick kiss on my forehead.
I should be the one asking him this.
"Bad." I uttered.
He let out of a soft laugh.
"My poor baby." He teased, pouting.
Oh my heart.
"I made you something. It'll help you with the hang over." He said as he stretched his arm to get something from the bedside table next to him.
He handed me a glass with redish-orangey liquid inside.
"Does it taste good?" The first thing I was able to ask. "It looks weird." I added.
"It doesn't." He chuckled. "I'm sure it doesn't. But you have to drink this."
I was hesitant to take the glass from him because it did look really weird but he made it for me and he said it'd help so I did eventually.
I was aware that his eyes were on me the moment I sipped on the drink. I was right, it tasted weird. There's tomato, carrot and ginger and oh my gosh I couldn't stand the taste.
"Did you put everything you had in the kitchen here?"
He laughed so hard.
I gestured to stop drinking but he urged me to drink more.
"I can't anymore." I protested.
"Just a little more Baby." He egged on.
So, I did. Closing my eyes, I tried my hardest to drink as much as I could.
"Good girl." He said patting my head when I almost finished everything.
"I'm not getting drunk ever again." I swore as I handed the glass back to him.
"I hope you never have to again." He replied and I couldn't neglect the hint of guilt in his tone.
***
We were lying on the bed, snuggling against each other. My eyes were closed as I concentrated on the sound of the beating of his heart and his steady breathing. He buried his face on my neck like the always did, the tip of his nose touching my skin, the soft feel of his lips distracting me every time he unintentionally graze it against my neck.
Then I remembered something.
"Baek?"
"Hmm..."
"Who changed my clothes last night?"
I swear, I could feel his smile without even seeing it.
"Why is it always an issue to you Baby?"
I opened my mouth to argue but no words came out.
"Of course I did." He answered using a matter of fact tone.
My face suddenly felt warm.
"What?!" I exclaimed unbelievably.
"Why are you so shocked?" He asked with an incredulous expression on his face when he leaned away to look at me.
His remarks made me a thousand times shy, I had to look away. Then I heard him let out of a soft laugh.
"What's funny?"
"Nothing." He said, a crazy smile on his lips before pulling me into a tight hug.
"Baekhyun!" I whined. "What is it?"
He ignored me.
"Did you really do it?" I continued to interrogate because I somehow felt like he was making fun of me.
Well. In fact he was really making fun of me and my tomato-like face right now.
His muffled laugh resonated and filled my ears and I just had to pinch his sides to get his attention.
"Ow!" He exclaimed and exaggeratedly groaning in pain. "Okay you did." He finally confessed when I pinched him again.
"I did what?"
"You changed your clothes yourself last night." He said sulking.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes." He answered hastily. "If I did it...then you wouldn't have pyjamas on." He said, his eyes piercing through mine.
I gulped. Ugh, this man.
"Why do you always like to make fun of me?" I asked him, couldn't help but sulk as well.
I pushed his chest away from me using my hands so I could turn around. I knew this was lame, but my face was about to explode because of embarrassment.
But then, it only took a couple of seconds before I felt him come near me. His hand found their way to my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder.
"Because I love you." He whispered.
His words sent shiver down my spine.
"Thank you for coming home to me." He added, his voice filled with affection. "I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if you didn't."
I closed my eyes, as his familiar warmth enveloped me. Having his arms wound around me like this, with our bodies pressed against each other was kinda distracting.
I turned to face him and instantly met the sad look in his eyes. I wanted to take it away. I wanted him to forget about it. I wanted to forget about it.
We both held each other's gaze.
Maybe a distraction is what we both need right now.
So, I took a deep breath before I leaned closer, closed my eyes and waited for my lips to make contact with his.
I gave him a soft, steady kiss before leaning away.
"Let's forget about everything for now, hmm?" Meeting his eyes once more, I told him.
I watched how his face looked afflicted for a moment before it was replaced by something else. His gaze turned heavy. I even heard him swallow.
I knew he was getting the message.
"Make me forget, Baekhyun."
In just a matter of few seconds, he already had his strong hand at the back of my neck, pulling my head closer to his. His lips grazing against mine for a brief moment.
"I love you."
These last three words reached my ears right before his mouth unstoppably claimed mine. The kiss started off cautious at first then it became intruding and needy. Sending every possible thought not related to what was happening right now out of the window. I was drowning with how good this was when he stopped all of a sudden to sit only to have me holding my breath when he pulled my pyjamas off.
As my heart almost skipped a beat because of what he just did...
A smirk. I swear I saw a handsome smirk on his face when he did it.
"Maybe I did change your clothes last night." He teased.
I groaned, rolling my eyes at his antics. I wanted to argue but he sure didn't have any intention to let me when his strong arms suddenly lifted me up and made me sit on his lap, facing him, my knees bent and ended up spreading around his waist.
I thought he was going to start kissing me again but didn't. He took his shirt off in one swift move instead. His perfectly toned chest and broad shoulders taking my entire attention. I brought my hands to his chest and cautiously grazed my fingers against his warm skin.
When I looked at his face, I was immediately mesmerized with how handsome he looked. He had always been handsome but he looked very different right now. His dishevelled hair almost covering his eyes. So, from his chest, I took my hands on his face to brush the hair away, freeing his beautiful forehead.
How is this man for real, honestly?
I swear. There's not a single part of his face that's not attractive. The moles which have been seemingly plotted perfectly on their spots. His eyebrows, his eyes, his nose, his lips...
Then I noticed something else. Aside from desire that's painted all over his face, there was something else. What could it be, I didn't know exactly but it gave me that sinking feeling behind my chest. Then maybe...maybe it was the same thing I had been trying to take my mind off.
Hurt, pain, worry and guilt. Everything related to what we were trying to escape from.
Now, I didn't want anything else but to lift whatever it was that's making him feel down. I held his gaze before I cupped his face with my both hands.
"I'm scared of losing you too." I told him, making an effort to sound reassuring.
I saw him swallow, his jaw slightly clenching in the process before he pressed his eyes closed. Then he buried his face in my neck, his hands around me tightening.
I was sure, I was so sure I'd start to be emotional but then I felt him take a deep breath and all of sudden titled my head down using his both hands and crashed his lips against mine. There was something about how every time his lips collide with mine that sends my rational thoughts somewhere else. The need and the want to drown myself with how good he was making me feel was overwhelming. It was so strong I wouldn't even win no matter how hard I resist it. Though I didn't have any intention to fight it.
Returning his kisses, wrapping my hands around his neck, my fingers tugging on his hair...
Every part of my body seemed to have known to fully function. My skin sensitive to his every touch. When he detached his lips from mine, I breathed raggedly, desperate for air. I momentarily opened my eyes only to shut them close once more when I felt his teeth grazing my jaw while his hands pulled my body closer to his, closing the littlest amount of distance left between us. Then he held my nape and gently tilted it on the right to have a better access because the next thing I knew, he tugged my shirt down my left shoulder. Watching him lean closer to plant a kiss on my shoulder made me realized how this was working.
It's working. Every time his lips would make contact with my skin, it somehow blurred images in my head. Thoughts that were a product of overthinking, the anxiousness and insecurities I felt in my nerves slowly ebbing away like waves leaving the shore.
Suddenly, his gazes, his ragged breathing, his warmth, his hair entangling with my fingers, his firm hands on my skin...were like colourful hues splashing over my seemingly now blank canvass thoughts.
He made a swift move to lay me down, my body gently landing on the mattress. Meeting my eyes for a second, I heard him utter in a low, raspy voice.
"I'm not gonna allow anything or anyone to take you away from me."
Conviction.
It was evident both in his tone and the way he stared at me.
***
2:14PM
We were in his car, driving out of the city. It was after lunch when he told me that he wanted to take me somewhere. I was at first, uncomfortable with the thought of us going out in the middle of this controversy but he assured me that there won't be anyone else there.
So, I agreed.
After about two hours of drive, we reached our destination. The place had no signs nor traces of the city. He stopped the car right outside a wooden entrance.
All geared up for the cold, we made our way inside. There was an array of Trees on either side that had almost lost all their leaves to Winter, making a long, perfect autumn covered leaves path.
Wow. This is beautiful.
I stopped on my feet as I looked up. The clear sky and the rays of the sun abundantly hover all over the place through the empty branches of the trees. I closed my eyes to inhale a breath of fresh air.
The air was cool and a bit crisp, I was pretty sure my nose and cheeks would turn red. I was enjoying everything when I felt his hands fixing my scarf.
He made me wear a long, black padded jacket and wrapped a scarf around my neck before leaving the car. He was also wearing the same but with a black bucket hat on that pretty much concealed most of his face.
"How do you know places like this Baek?" I asked him out of curiosity while I wait for him to finish fixing my scarf.
"Well, if you're not free to roam around like other normal people could, you have to find places where you can be yourself." He answered. "I once filmed a music video here. It was also at this time of the year and I loved how it peaceful and unoccupied it was. So, I came here every year." He trailed off to gently lift my chin with his hand.
I watched him remove his hat with his other hand as he planted a light, unannounced kiss that I wasn't ready for.
"You don't know how happy I am to be here with you this time." He said, the corner of his lips turning upwards. "I'm not alone anymore."
I couldn't help but smile both at his gesture and his remarks.
"Thank you for taking me to your secret places." I replied.
He pulled closer to him so he could hug me from the back for a few seconds. We admired the magnificent pathway before us silently before he took my hand and lead me to walk ahead.
"Someday..." He muttered, catching my attention as I looked at him. "Someday I'll be able to hold your hand like this in a crowded place."
I suddenly felt a bit guilty, recalling the words that came out of my mouth last night.
"Baek..."
He moved his head sideways, signalling me to stop.
"I'll do it, someday. I will make sure it happens." He smiled at me. "I promise."
I felt sad, I didn't really mean to pressure him about it or something.
"Do you believe me?" He asked with a yearning look on his face.
Soft. The look on his face made me feel so soft.
I nodded and as a result, he lifted our hands to his mouth and gave the back of my hand a soft kiss.
The place was so beautiful and we were taking it all in together. I absolutely didn't want to ruin it by asking him about anything we left in the city. So, when that familiar sinking feeling behind my chest tried to resurface, I leaned closer to him, clinging my on to his arm.
"Are you cold?" I heard him ask.
I nodded, because I really was.
We stopped walking and made us stand face to face. Then, he took my hands and had my palms pressed before I watch him blow on his hands, rubbed them and placed them on mine. The instant warmth brought by his hands on mine was satisfying.
"Is it helping?"
My response came in the form of a nod once more.
He did it a couple of time more and all I did was watch him.
How is this man real, really?
When he was done, he held my hands with his and put it inside his jacket's pockets, saying it'd preserve the warmth.
I couldn't help but laugh at his antics but got so conscious when I felt him staring at me. He looked a bit serious and it got me worried.
"What's wrong?"
He gazed at me for the next couple of seconds and I couldn't tell what was going on in his head.
"You're the best thing that has ever happened to me." He told me, as he gave my hands, which were still inside his pockets, a squeeze. "Do you know how much I love you?"
I just looked back at him as his eyes continue to bore into mine. I felt like getting lost in his gaze.
"I love you to the point I'm about to ask you to run away with me."
His words, always knew their way to my heart.
Honestly, my little heart may have been a home for his words.
Then, he made a step back before tugging my hands to his direction, sending me crashing next to him.
"I love you..." I muttered, leaning against him.
I closed my eyes as I mentioned his name.
"Byun Baekhyun."
Even his name, sounded like music to my ears.
***
The long pathway seemed endless as we walked ahead, our steps as slow as possible. I love doing this with him. Slow walks, our fingers entangled, dried leaves crushed right beneath our every step as we pay glances to each other from time to time.
"I want to show you something." He said all of a sudden.
"What is it?" I turned to him.
"You'll see." He said as he led the way.
Our steps fastened until we were already running. As we did, I couldn't help but look at his back profile. His hair bouncing, and that sparkle in his eyes when he glanced at me was priceless.
Makes me think that I don't really mind running away with him.
We ran until I was already out of breath. Then as we were about to reach the end of the pathway, he turned right and stopped right behind a tree. I immediately bent, my free hand resting on my knee so I could catch my breath. And while I did this, I looked around trying to find something special about the spot but couldn't find anything.
I was about to turn to him and ask him but he left me startled when he pulled me by the waist and had me pinned on the trunk of the tree. I was obviously still out of breath, my chest moving up and down from all the running and somehow couldn't even find the right coordination to express what I want to say in words when he leaned closer, resting his hands on either sides.
What are you doing? My poor brain tried to ask but failed to have my mouth verbalize it.
A seductive smile escaped his lips as he bore his eyes into mine. He was panting but not like the way I was. However, I could feel his breath fanning my face as his face was about an inch away from mine.
What is he gonna do?
Then in a matter of a second, my unheard question was answered when he closed the gap between our lips and started to kiss me.
Byun Baekhyun, I'm still trying to catch my breath!
The voice in my head wanting to protest disappeared after a split second when his persuasive mouth got me to agree with what he's up to and had me closing my eyes. With his hand landing on the curve of my waist, pulling my body closer, I just had to give it to this man. And when he tugged on my lower lip, I couldn't help but succumb to him.
If there's another thing Byun Baekhyun is good at, it would be making me feel like I'm the only one that matters when I'm inside his arms.
It feels like home.
A cocky smile appeared when he detached his lips from mine as he stared at me like he was staring at my very soul. He looked so handsome, I couldn't even blink my eyes afraid that he would disappear if I did.
"A...are you trying to kill me?" I asked him, wanting to distract myself from totally going crazy.
"Why?" He replied, obviously amused.
"Can't you see I was still trying to catch my breath?" I added.
He chuckled.
"I was just trying to return the favor baby." He reasoned out, tightening his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. "Can't you see you're also making me catch my breath?"
Oh my god. I hate him. I hate him and his lame pick up line.
And I hate how it gave me the butterflies and ended up smiling.
"I thought you're going to show me something?" For some miracle, I remembered to ask.
"I was but you looked so hot panting like that I just had to kiss you first."
There goes that crazy handsome grin on his face, it makes me weak on the knees.
"Crazy." I muttered as I slightly hit his arm.
He leaned closer and easily gave my lips a soft peck.
"You're blushing." He told me when I was about to argue before planting three more quick kisses on my mouth.
The butterflies in my stomach had turned into birds.
"God, I love kissing you." He said with a soft laugh. "And I'm the only one who has the right to kiss you, okay?"
I almost laughed at how possessive his statement sounded like but held it back.
I nodded, trying my best to stifle a smile.
"So what is it that you're going to show me?" I asked immediately since my heart couldn't seem to handle clingy Baekhyun anymore.
"Okay close your eyes." He told me as he let go of me.
"Baek, no more games please." I replied, stepping away from him.
"Yes, I promise." He swore. "Go ahead close your eyes." He instructed.
Honestly, he looked pretty convincing, so I did. Mentally preparing myself for the possible prank he was going to pull this time.
I didn't really know what to feel while my eyes were closed. I kept trying to think of what he could be up to and my brain was still trying to tell me to calm down when I felt his satin like lips on mine once more.
Another quick kiss.
"Now, open your eyes." I heard him say as soon as his mouth left mine.
I did what I was told to do and found his hand balled into fist in front of me, giving me a hint that there was something inside.
I looked at him, wondering when he revealed what was inside. The first thing I saw was a gold chain which later on turned out to be a necklace with a small gold...strawberry pendant?
I gasped.
One, because it was so pretty.
Two, because I couldn't believe he was giving me something like this.
"Baek..." It was all that I could muster, still staring at the small, extremely pretty pendant.
The strawberry pendant was so lovely. I had never seen anything like it. Oh my heart.
"Let me put it on you." He stated with a soft expression on his face as he moved behind me.
I took my scarf off so he could put it on me. When it was done, I reached for the pendant and couldn't help but admire how beautiful it looked.
"Do you like it?" He asked, his eyes on me.
Instead of a simple yes as an answer, I tiptoed to give him a big hug.
"I love it Baek!" I exclaimed. "Thank you."
"I'm glad you did." He replied, hugging me back as he spun me around.
I swear, my feet left the ground.
"You know why I'm giving you a strawberry pendant right?" I heard him when I was on my feet again.
"Because strawberries are your favourite?" I told him when we broke the hug.
"Do you remember when I told you up at the old hiking place that I was going to call you strawberry?"
I looked away to think about it.
"I do." I replied, recalling how he even made me blush telling me he'd call me strawberry because my face looked like one when I blush.
"Since that day, I never looked at strawberries the same way again. They always remind me of you and your blushing cheeks. I think I came to love them even more."
I laughed, I couldn't help but be amused.
"You're my favourite strawberry in the world." He said as I noticed him pinning me against the tree once more.
"Really?" I asked, feeling my back against the trunk.
"Uhuh..." He nodded. "In fact I named you Strawberry on my contacts."
"For real?" My eyes widened.
"For real." He answered, his mouth only about an inch closer to mine. "You want proof?"
I nodded, since it was the only thing I could do.
"Later." He muttered.
...and kissed me for the nth time today.
***
We were sitting on a set of wooden chair and table that's facing a small lake. I had my attention fixed on a single yellow leaf on the water when he spoke.
"Do you think your parents will like me?"
I had to blink my eyes to make sure that he was indeed asking me this question. I admit, I was a bit taken a bath, I wasn't able to answer him.
"You mentioned that you wanted to tell your sister and your parents about me." He added and I could sense that wishful tone in his voice. "Do you think they'll like me?"
His words and the way he said it warmed my heart.
"Of course Baek." I finally answered when I found the right words to say. "I'm pretty sure they'll like you." I added as I lifted a hand to his cheek. "What's not to like about you anyway?"
"A lot." I felt him take a deep breath as he looked down. "All these controversies, I come with I guess."
Oh...
"We'll figure it out when you meet them, okay?" I told him, not really sure what else to say to make him feel better. "I'm sure we'll figure it out."
A sad smile crossed his face before he made me lean in closer to rest my head on his shoulder.
"I know you heard everything Manager Kang and I talked about this morning."
I held my breath.
"He told me he saw you right outside the room...." He trailed off as I felt his chest move up to fill his lungs with air. "I'm sorry you had to hear it."
"Baek..."
"So, when I came back to my room and you pretended to sleep as if nothing happened..." He paused to plant a firm kiss on my forehead. "I love you and I hate how I make you suffer over and over again."
I gulped, my brain taking me back to what he said a while ago.
"Sometimes, I wished she never met me instead..."
Is he breaking up with me?
Everything inside me started to panic.
I leaned away from him so sudden and shot him a worried look. I waited for him to say something but no words came from him. I bit my lip as my heart pounded.
"Are you..." I paused as it was so difficult for me to even say the words. "Are you breaking up with me?"
I saw how his eyes widened.
"What?" He sounded so surprised. "No." He added firmly as he took my face in his hands. "Of course not. That would be the last thing I would do."
Relief took over me and it probably was written all over my face.
"What made you think I'm breaking up with you? God, I'd never do that." He said in a matter of fact tone as he pulled me in for hug. "I can't even stand the thought of not seeing you for a few days."
I must be crazy.
***
7:34PM
We arrived at his house when he seemed to notice another car parked. It wasn't his and for some reasons I kind of had the idea of whose it was. And I was proven right when I saw her get out of the car as soon as Baekhyun parked.
I saw Baekhyun gripped on the steering wheel before he got out, leaving the door ajar. I haven't heard them talking yet when I saw someone joined them. It was Mr. Yoo.
"I'm sorry Baekhyun, she was insisted to get in. She said she would cause a scene if I didn't let her in."
"It's fine Mr. Yoo. Just go back to your post." Baekhyun replied in a calm voice.
Then, I heard Mr. Yoo's fading footsteps.
"Baek, we need to talk." She said right away.
Hearing her voice caused that familiar pain right behind my chest to resurface right away.
God, I hate how much power she had over my emotions.
Baekhyun did not answer, he closed the door of the driver's car instead and walked towards the passenger's seat to hold the door open for me.
I wasn't really sure if it was the right thing but I had to trust him. So, hesitant as I was, I got off the car and saw how startled Ara looked like when she laid eyes on me.
She was wearing a fancy beige overcoat looking as beautiful as ever.
"You want to talk?" Baekhyun asked. "Let's talk with my girlfriend." He added and how he emphasized his last word did not escape my attention.
"Baek." I hesitated.
"It's fine Baby. There's nothing too personal that we have to talk anyway." He told me as he held my hand.
My heartbeat raced with his unexpected and totally unannounced act. And I just saw Ara's eyes darted to our hands. She looked stunned for a moment before she tilted her head down. She was hurt. I could see it clearly. Especially with the way she took a deep breath, momentarily looking away.
"What are you doing here, Ara?" I heard Baekhyun asked coldly.
She turned to look at him, forcing a smile.
"Well, I was hoping I could talk to you in private about what happened. But you're clearly not alone." She answered.
This is awkward. Not to mention, annoying at the same time.
"Did you two go somewhere?" She asked once more.
"Yes. I took her out on a date." Baekhyun snapped, I knew for sure that he was trying to control his temper.
"Are you out of your mind?" She said in a slightly loud voice but later on cleared her throat. "Right in the middle of the issue about what happened to us in Paris? What if someone sees you with her? What would people say?"
Wow. How she sounded hurt, offended and concerned was amazing.
"Nothing happened in Paris Ara." He told her nonchalantly.
"What do you mean nothing happened?" She asked him incredulously. "How would you explain the photos online?"
"How about you explain it to me instead." He told her in a still controlled voice. "I know you and Publisher Kim were behind it." He let out of a sarcastic laugh.
She absolutely looked alarmed, dazed.
"I don't know what you're talking about Baekhyun." She denied, looking away.
"You really have to go this far? For what Ara?"
"To make you realize that I'm still the one that you love." She reasoned out in a slightly panicky voice. "You know you still do. That kiss, you felt something right?"
She sounded desperate.
This was making me feel so uncomfortable, I wanted to leave but Baekhyun wouldn't let me go by holding on to my hand tightly. I didn't wanna be here. I didn't want to witness this.
"I clearly didn't." He said. "And you know that."
I couldn't imagine how knife-stabbing painful his word was for her.
"So, you'd better do something about this. Tell everyone that there's nothing going on between us and the photo was nothing but a misunderstanding. You know for sure what would happen if I do it myself."
She did not say anything for a moment but I saw how her hands balled into fists. She bit her lip as she glared at me for a second before turning to Baekhyun.
"No one's gonna believe it. How do you expect me to convince people that it was just a misunderstanding Baekhyun? How could a kiss caught on camera be a misunderstanding?"
"It's your problem. Why don't you ask Publisher Kim to help you out since the two of you did well playing me anyway." He sounded so bitter.
"You're going to make me a laughing stock. You know that right?"
"None of these would've happened if you-"
"If what?!" She intercepted, this time yelling.
I slightly jumped on my feet and I felt Baekhyun squeezed my hand.
"If I didn't try to fight for you?" She trailed off to take a deep breath. "Can't you see that I still love you Baekhyun?" She added as she stepped closer to hug him.
I held my breath watching Baekhyun let go of my hand only to take hold of her arms so he could pull her away from him.
"We're done Ara. We have been for a long time." He said while he had his hands on her.
She looked at him unbelievably.
"Are you serious?"
"Dead serious." He answered, letting go of her.
Ara looked at him unbelievably and let out of a sarcastic laugh.
"Her?" She said, pointing and glaring at me. "You're ditching me because of her?"
"I never gave you hope that we could happen again Ara." Baekhyun answered as he took my hand once more and made me stand close to him. "And yes, she's everything I want and need. She's the only woman I ever want to be with."
I saw the formation of tears in her eyes but it was as if she was trying her best not to shed any. She was obviously mad and this was really stressing me out.
"Miss Kim is right. You must be out of your mind. Can't you see how different she is from us? Her world is way too different from ours. She wouldn't survive your world Baekhyun. You know that... she'll eventually leave you."
For some reasons, her words made more of an impact to me. And I couldn't help but acknowledge the building anger inside me with the way she's trying to speak for me. The way she was definitely looking down on me. I couldn't hold it in any longer. So, before I could even think things through, I opened my mouth to speak.
"I'm not like you Ara."
I felt both Baekhyun and Ara's eyes on me the moment I spoke.
"You had him." I gulped, trying my best to let the words out. "Yet you still chose to show affection to another man."
She looked at me with dagger eyes.
"You have no right to speak to me this way." She said in gritted teeth. "You don't know me. You have no idea what Baekhyun and I went through. He loved me-"
"Loved." I intercepted. "Past tense." I trailed off trying to keep my voice steady. "It's funny how you acknowledge everything about you and Baekhyun was in the past yet you're still here."
She looked as if she was ready to fight the next moment I met her eyes.
"So you think you're better than me? Huh?!" She told me with fiery eyes. "You think you could love him better than I do? Do you think you deserve someone like him when you're nothing but some random girl he met?"
"Ara stop." Baekhyun demanded.
"He's going to let you go when things get hard! He's going to choose his career over you!" She continued, ignoring him.
"Ara I said stop." I heard Baekhyun said once more.
But then instead of stopping, she stepped towards me without a warning and grabbed me by the arm right away. I flinched at how tight her grip on my arm was. Though it only lasted for a few seconds because Baekhyun took her hands off me as soon as possible. Even when he was already trying to control her, she was still struggling to break free so she could get near me.
It scared me.
"You don't have the right to show up here and ruin everything!" She went on. "Go back to where you came from!"
Then, I saw Mr. Yoo take Ara from Baekhyun.
How he got here, I wasn't so sure.
Baekhyun stepped away and went back to where I was standing. She pulled me in his arms and asked me if I was okay. He looked extremely worried, mad and panicky at the same time. So, I nodded, hoping it would calm him down.
"Don't you ever lay a finger on her again!" He said in gritted teeth when he turned to face her once more. "And don't ever talk to her the way you just did. You don't have any right Ara. And if you ever hurt her again, in any way-"
"Then what?!" She asked, this time sounding hysterical. "What Baekhyun, huh? Are really willing to risk everything for her?" Her tone was challenging.
Baekhyun stayed quiet for the next couple of seconds.
And I didn't know what to feel about it.
I didn't even know if I wanted him to say yes or not.
"I knew it." Ara let out of a soft laugh as she was shook Mr. Yoo's hands away. "I knew you couldn't. You couldn't even risk it for me before...of course you won't-"
"Yes." Baekhyun muttered making her stop mid-sentence.
Yes? Did he just say yes?
Speechless, I looked up to meet his eyes.
"If I have to." He said, his eyes boring into mine.
I was too overwhelmed to say anything.
What? Did he really just say...
No, Baekhyun...no. Please.
"No." It came from Ara. "No, you won't." She shook her head, refusing to believe what she just heard.
"Yes Ara." He told her, his jaw clenching. "I fucking would."
I saw how disbelief took over Ara's face but I couldn't dwell on it for long since I was busy trying to convince myself that he just said yes.
No. He couldn't have possibly said it.
Right?
"Mr. Yoo, kindly escort Ara outside." He instructed as he wrapped an arm around me to take me inside.
I couldn't say anything.
I was too overwhelmed to function right now.
***
Alone.
I was on the couch sitting, my hands slightly trembling trying to process how everything that happened was real. The look on Ara's face when she grabbed me...
Baekhyun telling her that he's willing to risk everything for me.
No. He probably didn't mean it.
He shouldn't mean it.
He appeared in front of me with a glass of water in his hand. He urged me to drink it and I got glass from him but instead of drinking, I ended up staring at him.
For the first time, I looked and thought of him as the Byun Baekhyun of Korea. His celebrity version. The singer. The one that makes a lot of people happy.
No.
There were a pair of footsteps entering the living room and it made me snap out of my thoughts right away. It was Mr. Yoo. I looked directly at him while he alternately looked at me and Baekhyun. He had a big brown envelope in his hands that made me a thousand more uncomfortable.
"What is it Mr. Yoo?" I heard Baekhyun asked.
"This came in the mail this afternoon. But the thing is, this isn't addressed to you Baekhyun..." He trailed off taking his eyes away from Baekhyun to me. "It's for Hae Won."
I held my breath.
Why would something for me be sent to Baekhyun's house?
"What?" Baekhyun asked as he stood to get the envelope from Mr. Yoo. "Why would it be addressed to her..." He paused when he finally checked the name written on him.
I couldn't see his reaction since he was facing the other way but I immediately felt that something was not right. I was anxious and it heightened when Baekhyun looked back at me, he didn't say anything but the look on his face was already a confirmation. He walked towards the table before he unsealed the envelope and took what was inside.
Photos.
They were photos.
He took out the first one and it was a picture of me in the flower shop. I was standing on the doorway saying goodbye to a customer.
Oh god.
The next photo was ours. It was at night. I was crossing the street towards Baekhyun who was standing next to his car. I instantly recognized it. It was that time when he asked me to sneak out of the house. It was the same night, Aunt Sunny and Ji Hye found out about us. There were two more photos of that moment. The next one was when he was hugging me and the third one was when he followed me to the house.
I heard Baekhyun take a deep breath as he tilted his head down for a moment.
"Fuck!" He hissed.
It sent shivers down my spine.
This can't be real.
The next set of photos were taken on the night after his concert.
At the park when he was cupping my face with his hands.
Then there was also a photo of me during his concert.
The last one was taken last night. Right outside his house.
We were facing each other, he was holding my hand.
Oh god.
There were too many photos.
Unfiltered. Unedited.
How is this possible?
This is too much.
This shouldn't be happening all at once.
My head ached, I suddenly felt dizzy that I totally forgot about the glass of water I was holding. It slipped from my hand and immediately made a crashing sound when it hit the floor right next to my feet.
Baekhyun turned to look at me.
That look on his face.
How could I ever describe it?
That familiar sinking feeling in my heart, again.
The photos on the table.
"Hae Won..." I heard him call but my head started to focus on something else.
"Baby, it's okay. We'll figure this out, okay?" I heard him say in a slightly panicked voice.
The next thing I knew he was already hugging me, consoling me.
I didn't know what I was feeling at the moment.
I wasn't even sure if I was able to feel anything at all.
"I promise, it's going to be fine." His voice was just above a whisper.
Right before my tears totally blurred my vision, I was able to make up my mind.
There was no way I would allow him to risk everything for me.
No.
And as if he knew what was going on inside my head...
"Trust me, please."
~♥~