12:52pm,
Abuja
IN
an hour and quarter, Simi landed in Abuja. Ada, her manager had wanted to book her a ride back to the studio but she declined saying she wanted to see her mother and brother first so she arranged a cab for herself when she left the airport. Thank goodness her bag was light and not troublesome.
Her flight back to Abuja was longer now than the flight to Ibadan two weeks ago and she knew why; it was the painful thoughts that infringed her, the painful thoughts of parting with Adam, the painful thoughts of knowing that he quickly replaced her with Suwa. At first her sadness was only because she thought they would never get the chance to be together again when he leaves the country but when she saw her (Desuwa) in that jeep, she had felt more anxiety build inside her. She should have known something was up with them, that he was just catching fun with her.
Her thoughts jutted in different directions and some scenarios were brought to mind; like Todun's bachelorette party when Adam and Suwa met, the after wedding party at the bar and that unforgettable morning when he raged out of nowhere, she was calling him endlessly before she left the hotel in annoyance. These things played through her mind and it was all adding up now that she had just made a fool of herself thinking Adam was honestly liking her. She even let him make passionate love to her, she had thought that was honest too. Now that she replayed it, they hadn't made love, it was just a good sex. Played. I've been played.
At that moment, the emotions that consumed her were too raw to think clearly, her nerves too frazzled to make rational decisions, so she brought out her phone from the cross purse, blocked and even deleted his number before the cab reached the airport. Whatever happened in Ibadan was going to stay in Ibadan, she decided in her heart. The driver just kept looking at her in a weird way.
Now that she was back to Abuja, a breeze of home blew her and she felt safer. Unlike Ibadan, she knew her way around here and there was a freedom that came with that knowledge. When she stopped an empty cab in front of the airport, she told the driver her destination, they talked about the price and she hopped in. He was a very rough driver but very fast too so the journey of forty minutes was reduced to thirty two.
Reaching her mother's house, the gate was opened as usual and she freely made her way into the big compound. It was a good thing that the estate was very secured because they had a very ineffective gateman, nothing like Ali. This man was always drinking and sleeping. Simi had told her mother that he had two unfortunate habits and advised that he should be dismissed but it wasn't her mother's decision to make. She and her son, Anjola were only one out of six other tenants that occupied the building.
She walked towards her mother's apartment and knocked the door.
"Who's that?" A mellow voice of a woman in her late forties called from inside.
"It's your daughter Mummy. Simi." She retorted sounding slightly brittle.
"Ah my girl, you're back." The door immediately opened and Simi was standing in front of her mother, Christy. It's been almost two months since they last saw. She opened the door more widely and Simi walked in.
Christy locked the door and turned to receive her daughter's outstretched arms. They hugged eachother tightly for what seemed like fifteen seconds and in no time, Simi began to cry. This particular reaction triggered Christy because her daughter that she knew never cried. Not for anything. Not even when her father died. Or her so-called first love. She immediately let go of the hug, rested her hands on Simi's shoulders and looked up at her daughter who was only few inches taller.
"Simi, are you okay? What's making you cry?"
Simi didn't say anything but she cried on, tears welled, burning at her eyelids and sliding down her cheeks. She was letting out a lot of emotions that she had contained for a long time.
She used to think she was strong, numb to feelings and always had control of her mind but she was now dissapointed at herself because.. look what Adam had made her. Weak! He had already switched on her feelings and broke the walls she had learned to build so high. He had put fire to her passion and her ability to feel more strongly, which was both a blessing and a curse. He had made her vulnerable and she hated it. She hated him because he had done all these for nothing and she wished it could all just stop. It was only two weeks!
Christy watched her daughter breakdown, it was a rare sight and it broke her too. She wanted to know badly what was going on in her head and what could have happened that tore her this way but she knew now was not the time. Simi needed comfort not questions so she pulled her into her arms again.
"If you told me you were going to Ibadan, I would have told you not to. Nothing good comes from there. Now see what they've done to my daughter." Her words were supposed to be comforting but instead it spread like fuel to fire because just then Simi burst out into a louder cry.
***
12:12am,
Ibadan.
IT
was past midnight, Adam, restless and anxious was having one of those sleepless nights and their mother wasn't back from visiting her sister. After they had that talk yesterday, Feyisetan left the house to see Dunni. It was all too much for her to handle but surprisingly it wasn't as bad as he had prepared for all the years. She broke down as expected, but she didn't faint nor cry, as expected. The expression she wore, the change in her tone and her immediate loss of appetite showed she was disappointed in him, deeply disappointed but one thing, she was happy to hear about her grand son and couldn't hide that. Adam showed her a couple of photos that Lily had bombarded him with after she told him about Wayne and this particular news made her somewhat fulfilled; she was now a grandma.
Yet, she still couldn't believe that her son would get married to a white woman and keep it a secret from her for four good years, even the divorce. Divorce! This was the part she could not fathom. Her own son was divorced.
"Why? Adam why? Why did you choose to embarrass me this way? Why did you let it get so worse? I know William put you to this. I know he made you do it. Christ! Adam! I didn't train you to take the same step as your father and I. "
She said a lot of things that still rang in his head, that got him wordless and unable to say anything in his own defense because really, there was nothing to say. He knew he had 'fucked up' and now he was waiting for her to come back home so that they can talk about it, with his sister too. And also announce to them that his flight back to the US was on Thursday. His assistant Rosie had arranged it.
He thought of his sister Tiara who had just returned from her date few hours ago with her new friend, Desuwa; who was in his room earlier with all kinds of seduction which truly had effects on him but he was not surprised. She was a stripper, a pro and he was a man after all. What surprised him was how his sister was suddenly friends with her.
He had met Suwa only four times, once at the club, twice during Todun's wedding and then yesterday and he could tell that she was smart, crazy like fox. She had an undeniable sex appeal, an hourglass shape, a very sensual sense of fashion, an untroubled way of life and a pretty face that complemented it.
The first time at Drip Strip, she tickled his fancy in a slick way and honestly he could have had her that night but not with Simi always lingering on his mind. He thought about it, Suwa was nothing as Simi. She was not as angelic, mindful, soothing or ...as organic. He still tried to wrap his head around it, why she blocked his number so fast?
On returning, Tiara had told him about her safe landing in Abuja but he wanted to talk to her himself. He wanted to ask about her journey, tell her about his confession to his mother and ask for some advice. He wanted to hear her voice. He needed to.
He checked his phone again and it was almost one o'clock. He breathed deeply and shoved his duvet away first. She used to be at the other side of the door, but not anymore. He rose from his sleeping position, dropped his feet on the cold ground and glanced at the door. What you're about to do is stupid. She's gone, get over it. One minute you didn't want her, next minute you won't get over her man.
You better don't do it! Apparently not listening to himself, Adam stood up fully in his knickers and went towards the door until he was in the room across the hall. The lights were on, but the room was now empty and airy because of the breeze that whistled through the curtains. Walking towards the window, it was like he could still smell her, it was already fading but it was there, or he imagined. He closed the window panel before moving towards the bed and stood by the edge, hands on his hips as several memories showed off, especially of him carrying her back in after she'd slept off on his body in his room, some nights back. He replayed how peaceful she looked when she slept. In his head, he replayed her voice that always had a calming effect, like it could take his sorrows away and he was already hearing it.
He told himself again that he was being too dramatic, coming into her room and trying to get in touch with her some way because that was crazy. The last time he did that was after his brother died, only this time she was still alive. But just away, forever.
It wasn't supposed to go like this, everything. He wasn't supposed to feel this way, not supposed to feel it so strongly that it was making him act this way. After everything he went through with Lily, he swore never to fall in love and he was doing a good job until Simi accidentally came into his life.
When he saw her again in his house that day, he had warned himself not to have anything to do with that lady. Women are nothing but trouble, he would tell himself but without conscious effort, like reflex, he had had something to do with her and that something was not going away. She was like a drug and he had innocently found peace in her, maybe trust. She was also willing and that's why he still couldn't understand her sudden change. Why did she block my number?
He rose up from where he had settled and paced the room, like he was trying to get a clue. But he thought again, what's the point? His flight back to New York was three days away and there was nothing to be done. She had left, he would leave too and they'd both move on with their lives, exactly as she had stated it.
He was going to see his son and... Lily too. It was like a dagger to his heart when that thought of his ex-wife came, just as everytime. He had not seen her in years, she kept his son away from him and he wondered how it would be seeing her again. Would he be sad? Angry? Would his son make it better? Would their feelings grow again? That's impossible... More importantly, would he be a good father? Or turn out to be just like his father? Since his mother already pointed out that he just might be...
His thoughts were abruptly cut off and he stopped in his tracks when he saw something on the floor, next to the bed or maybe his eyes were playing tricks on him. He stooped to hand-pick a tiny piece of rolled brown burnt paper and when he put it up between his eyes, he was right. It was rolled marijuna, already smoked to half. What the hell?! He squinted his eyes to double check and once again, he was right. How did this get here? Simi! It had to be hers, there was no other logical explanation. He dropped it on the mirror stand and sat down back on the bed. How careless!
He hated marijuana because it killed his brother, at least that's what he thought and he hated it more now because Simi was doing it too. He had been very disappointed when he found out nights ago and even more disappointed to think that she wasn't as 'angelic' as he had thought.
I know you hate marijuana but you should try it sometime. It really helps with the nerves...I'm serious, it's going to help you with...with your unease sometimes. Your shrink should have told you that.
She had told him that yesterday before she left and it still sounded as ridiculous as the first time. Why would anyone in his or her right senses think engaging in such deadly act was going to help him? He took a look at the joint again and it was as though it was staring back at him back.
He came to the room just to feel Simi's presence and maybe this was it, since it was her thing. Now you're really crazy if you're thinking this. He must have been because that was the only way he could understand it. He felt something under the sheets poke him and lifting one of his butt cheeks, Adam retrieved a small fancy lighter that had her name engraved on it with cool font and obviously she must have mistakenly left it behind. Weirdly, it was now adding up. There was a joint and lighter with Simi's name on it and somehow he could feel her more closely.
It was becoming more ridiculous and her words rang again. I'm serious, it's going to help you with...with your unease sometimes. It was as though she was there with him and her voice was still alluring, even more convincing. This is getting out of hand!
He picked up the reefer that laid innocently on the stand and he reviewed it. Really, what harm could this tiny piece do? He asked himself. Even if truly, it was deadly, he couldn't die on the spot so what if he wanted to try it and understand what it was about it that Sam was addicted to, Simi too? He looked at it again and after a third thought, he put the reefer between his lips. Still to his own amazement, he put the handheld device to create the fire to it while he dragged in a brume. Immediately he choked and he knew he had made a mistake trying this at all. Stupid. For some seconds he coughed until he was fine.
Not believing himself, he tried it again but this time, more carefully so he didn't choke on it. He took in a long drag of air and slowly he breathed it out. He repeated the action another five times and a spontaneous smile found its way to his lips. He felt all this thoughts dance away as the clouds of air in front of his eyes and they were leisurely replaced with some kind of ecstasy. What sort of sorcery is this? He still didn't believe or understand the effect the marijuana was taking but he liked it. It was strong and almost intoxicating. He took more tokes of the joint but with every toke, he elevated inside and the rolled paper deprecated.
It was doing just what Simi said it would do, even more. At that moment he could no longer feel the nerves that had built up and he could feel himself ease up. The smile was now plastered on his face, his eyes were dimming too but he was excited. He wanted to feel like this for a little bit more but by the time he realized it, the joint was already down to ash.
The way his mood switched from a zero to a hundred with just a few tokes was a wonder. His therapeutic drugs from his shrink used to help his nerves too, but not as fast and definitely not as acute. What he felt now was beyond relaxation of nerves but also an elevation of his mind and he loved it. He couldn't understand how something like this could make him feel so good and definitely it was not harmful, at least not yet.