Chapter 27 - Merry Christmas, Kiss My Ass
Nausea filled within my stomach. Nearly falling to the ground due to the uneasiness surging into my veins, and my mind was spinning and wanted nothing more to erase the disturbing motion picture playing through my mind of the scene of Derek and Caleb
Out of all people in the world, it just had to be freaking Caleb.
The same Caleb, who happened to be the same brother of the married woman as known as Jasey, who had an affair with Alex, this, could not get poorer.
"Oh my god," I panted, placing my icy hand on my sweltering forehead. My pace accelerated and my heart thumbed against my ribs overly unhealthy when I could hear the loud pattering footsteps of whom I assumed to be Derek's.
He barged into my room fully clothed - thankfully. His loud pants and his bulging eyes clearly showed how much he was freaking out. He slammed the door shut, carefully raising his hand. I stopped my pacing, but my eyes had the hardest of time to even look at him.
"I know what you're thinking," He cautiously said.
You have no idea what I'm thinking.
"Just please don't tell dad," He pleaded. "...yet."
I shook my head, this was bizarre. I had no desire to tell my father, not all. The fact that it's with Caleb had shaken me up.
Caleb was directly in my house, where I feel the safest besides in Alex's arms. Now, I feel like I've been ripped from my longtime safety. My sudden uncomfortable surroundings were screaming for me to run.
"Is there something you'd like to tell me?" I choked out. Who knew, after all the countless amounts of girlfriends he went through, he's finally learning out that he's gay.
"Please, Laila, I beg of you. Don't tell dad until I know for sure." His voice cracked with his eyes being droopy, holding a great amount of worriedness. Now I truly know the reason of why he's been acting up. All the past weeks with him being jumpy and always nervous wasn't because of Kenzie, it was because of him questioning his sexuality.
"Until you know for sure?" I raised my eyebrow, crossing my arms. "By now doing what you just did, you'd think you would technically know what you are sure of." I gave him a suspicious look. Me being his younger sister, it was time to play a little game of payback. Derek had no idea of who Caleb was to me. To Derek, he naturally thought that Caleb didn't know who I was and the equally same way with me to Caleb. But that's plainly wrong.
"Laila," He sighed with a whine.
"Alright," I rolled my eyes.
He gave me a small hug before he left my room. Even though I wasn't portraying any of the anxiety building rapidly in me, it was still strongly nudging and pinching every piece of my nerves.
I landed on my bed, screaming into my pillow, emptying all the stress and burden that's been piled on me these past weeks.
Caleb knew very well of my relationship status of Alex and me, meaning with him possibly being around more often, he will take advantage of that. He'll waste no time with making my life a living Hell - he's already doing the same with Alex. There's no way of knowing to what extent he will reach just to jeopardize my relationship with Alex.
A sense of protectiveness that I held towards our relationship released. I wasn't going to have someone like Caleb ruin the perfect thing of what I cherish with my entire heart on a daily basis to every second of the day.
I rolled over once again on my bed relentlessly. The humiliating images of seeing not only Derek naked but Caleb's bare sweaty body almost caused me to gag.
I debated whether if I should tell Alex. I'm sure he'd get a good laugh of hearing that the all mighty brave Caleb is gay. I, for one, didn't practically care, although with my brother in the equation, it was mandatory that I cared.
Groaning, I called him. It only took two rings for him to pick up.
"Miss me already?" He chuckled.
Ignoring his sassy remark, I got straight to the point, "Caleb is at my house."
Immediately, there was an awful screeching piercing my ears coming through the phone. "What?!" Alex growled. I finally comprehended it was his tires making the horrendous noise.
"Maybe I should have called you when you weren't on the road..." I trailed off, biting my lip.
"No, Laila, Why the fuck is he there? I'm already turned around. I'll be over in less than five minutes." He angrily said.
I could easily picture him, gripping the steering wheel with his knuckles running out of color and his face boiling with red.
"You're going to laugh if I tell you why he's here, and besides, I don't think he even knows I'm here." It was true. Caleb looked a little too occupied to notice my face when I walked in on them.
"Laila, what are you talking about?" He asked. It was clear to hear the confusion rising in his tone.
"IwalkedinonDerekandCalebdoingthenasty." I jumbled up all my words under one breath.
"Laila," He said slowly. "please speak English."
"So, I mean, it was an accident, and I'm honestly going to have worse night mares now. But I mean, it won't be anything that I'm not used to, ya know? I've dealt with night mares my whole life." I rambled.
"Laila, stop your damn rambling and just tell me or for God sake's I'm going to be busting down your front door."
I took in a deep breath. "I found Derek and Caleb, um doing like, yeah."
"Oh?"
"Yeah…oh." I whispered.
For a split second, I could hear a chuckle through the line, and then it went silent.
Rolling my eyes, I knew that this will be the remainder of our conversation. We did this a lot - staying on the phone with nothing to say but neither of us wanting to hang up.
Alex was probably taking in what I just told him. Even I was trying to process it all myself. Only in my life this would happen, of course.
If Derek was happy and were to come out as gay, I'd support him fully. It's just Caleb blocked me from doing that.
Derek deserved a better guy than Caleb. Derek deserved a type of guy like Alex.
Maybe it's my little sister protectiveness kicking in and along with my safeguard of my relationship with Alex doing the talking, but I hated Caleb on a level that I had no idea was even likely to reach.
Caleb had bad news written all over him, and Derek is clearly blinded.
"Oh my god," I screamed into my pillow once again, forgetting about Alex who was on the phone.
Derek, after all these years, is gay. And Caleb, if word got around, I know he'd surely just knock down the rumors.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, just, a little shocked." I sighed.
A little shocked was an understatement. My mind was completely blown away from the unexpected information.
Heavily sighing, I came up to the conclusion that I needed to support Derek no matter what...I'll just have to deal with Caleb on another time.
For the next day, Christmas Eve was obscenely awkward with the rising tension with Derek and I.
Uncle Gabe and my father bickered throughout the day, making me want to stab my eyes out with a fork.
Normally, we didn't really bother with Christmas Eve as much. Especially after the death of Kenzie. We didn't celebrate Christmas like we used to for years. But it didn't affect me like it did with Derek. Being only in the first grade, I didn't understand the full concept of Christmas yet anyhow.
This year, I wasn't that all excited for Christmas. It just didn't feel the same anymore. There weren’t much Christmas decorations besides the Christmas tree that only had a few of Derek's and I's baby ornaments. There was no smell of pine or any type of cookies, just the plain old typical smell of the Grey's household.
Plus, somehow and some way, I had to sneak out to go visit Alex's parents.
Oh, what have I gotten myself into?
I tossed and turned the whole night, waiting for Christmas to come. My Christmas list wasn't much and besides, I'm assuming Dad would get me mainly gift cards like he's been doing these past years. He is terrible at shopping for gifts, especially Christmas gifts.
I watched the morning sun creep up from the white snowy horizon. The brightness caused my droopy tired eyes to squint. At this point, with the sleep deprived night, I believed it was because of the nervousness of actually meeting Alex's parents.
I had no clue of who they were, what they were, or how they were. Hell, I didn't even know their names. Now, I had to spend Christmas with them. The awful pit in my stomach was starting to make this early morning of Christmas not joyful.
Around a little after five-thirty, Derek barged in my room with a goofy smile. Things are still uncomfortable between us. It's at dinner when it's the worst. His blank stares burn deep into me and the way he's utterly silent. But I guess it being Christmas; it pushed away that awful train wreck of thoughts and our little secret from our dad. Thankfully, I haven't seen Caleb around since that day.
We raced down stairs like little kids would. My father was already in the living room in a blue robe. Our makeshift Christmas tree had presents surrounding by it. For the first time in what seemed like forever, I had a unforced smile in the home that somehow just turned into a 'house' to me.
It took less than an hour to rip through the presents. Since Derek and I are older, the amount of presents we received over the years lessened, but we didn't seem to care with the maturity that we gained within those years.
Uncle Gabe watched from the couch, sipping on a hot mug of black coffee.
I received a few new books that I was dying to get my hands on, a gift card with a certain amount of money, and a sweater. All the other things were small things that weren't really exciting, but I was yet to be grateful and happy about it.
My mind began to race of ways to sneak out without getting noticed. Alex arranged a certain time to meet up with him at the usual local store down a mile from my house.
We were eating breakfast and that's when the unthinkable thought popped up. It was the most devious thing I could ever do and would break my trust with Derek. But it had to be done. It was my only way out of here. Derek won't talk to me ever again, I already know. My circumstances were forcing to do this, normal Laila wouldn’t dare to do such a bold and nerve wracking thing.
It was perfect timing to do it right now with everyone eating their breakfast silently here at the dining table.
I dropped my fork on my half-finished plate. Derek had no idea what was coming towards him. It was only going to be the matter of seconds that our little secret between us will be spilled. Controlling my shaky leg was useless along with my wandering eyes that were trying to time the perfect moment to do such a thing.
This is for Alex.
“Derek is gay!” I blurted it out. The dropping of all of their forks echoed through the room. Derek’s face was covered in the deepest shade of red. His eyes were shooting daggers at me.
Uncle Gabe choked on his scrambled eggs, loudly coughing up, his chin jiggled as he did so.
Dad, who was first taken back from my impulsive behavior, began to laugh. He laughed so greatly, his hand was grasping his chest and that tears were forming at the brim of his eyes. “Laila, don’t be so silly.”
It pained me to look at Derek now. I’m positive that was like a bullet in his heart. But technically, this could be pay back? For the time he told dad about Alex and so many other things that could easily stack up.
“I’m not lying, I swear!” I desperately defended myself.
For Alex, all for him.
Uncle Gabe still was choking from my outrageous words. Dad, however, stopped his laughing, realizing that I was serious.
Derek kicked me multiple times under the seat, pleading for me not to go further with the conversation. But his technique of using his kicking didn’t persuade me, not one bit.
“I saw him with a guy.” I flat out said. It killed me to do this, every piece of me was screaming at me of how I was the worse sister and that I was winning the most gruesome sister award. But with Alex in the back of my mind, it all didn’t seem to matter anyhow.
It took extreme amount of confidence to do this. The confidence that I fished up from the deep of my soul was fading out quickly.
“Derek, is there something you’d like to share?” My father said. His tone was too calm for this. I think it’s because of my wrong timing and Uncle Gabe who finally got his choking under control.
All eyes were on Derek. Waiting for his answer, I bit down on my lip.
Out of all the years of knowing my older brother, I’ve never seen his face so embarrassed and disappointed. His hands that laid on the table crunched into tight fists.
Without a second to grasp reality, Derek’s chair screeched on the title floors from his sudden speed of moving his chair. Standing up, towering over the table, he screamed out of pure anger. “YOU SAID YOU WOULDN’T TELL HIM!”
His roaring sent his hot breath over my face, causing me to close my eyes shut from the harsh breeze.
He stomped out of the kitchen and upstairs. I awkwardly stood up from the painful silence that was left. Uncle Gabe mouth was wide open and he just looked utterly speechless – I know the feeling all too well. Dad, well, by his expression, my heart ached.
He looked like he was destroyed by the fact his own son couldn’t tell him what I had just delivered. It was like he was done with being a father to Derek and me. I don’t blame him. We weren’t the easiest kids.
I never really thought of it until now, but it must be tiring to be a single father.
Even though I could stood there for hours to think of how hard my dad had it, I left. This was for Alex. The reminding of it kept my heart straighten out and my mind. Leaving them alone put a pang in my heart. At least I know I still have some type of emotions after yet again another impulsive move on me. Why couldn’t I just be honest with them?
Oh yeah, it’s because of the god forbidden told secret of my father and brother hating Alex.
I changed out of multiple outfit selections. The green shirt I originally picked wasn’t going to cut it. The pink blouse was trying too much. Then the blue sweater was too casual.
I chewed on the inside of my cheek while I stared into the mirror, holding up a red V-neck. It was simple, nice, and still kept the Christmas spirit that seemed nonexistent in my household.
The black jeans I picked would do. Somehow, with a miracle, I maintained my wild hair.
Now, it was the waiting game of siting on my bed. This was it. Meeting his parents won’t be bad at all. I’m sure they’re friendly. Maybe having Alex go see them will repair their shattered relationship. With me there, I know this will relief Alex greatly and release pressure off his shoulders.
Alex interrupted my train of thought by texting me, stating he was already at the local store. I hauled on my heavy cotton jacket with my boots. It took me forever just to get my mittens on.
Walking down the street wasn’t too bad. The coldness hit my face from the strong wind. The sun’s reflection off the white snow was blinding but I made it.
My heart fluttered by the sight of his car. I got in and immediately the warmness of the heat circulating allowed me to gain back into a normal human body temperature.
Alex and I shared a small kiss before we drove off. He was wearing a black cotton sweater above a white collared shirt that was tight on him and nice black pants.
I think we both knew it was best to allow the radio that was playing Christmas songs to fill the air. We didn’t want to ruin what we had left of our Christmas spirit.
Alex had a pine tree car freshener dangling from his rear view mirror. The smell reminded me of my childhood and all the times I’d sit by my Christmas tree late at night. I would stare at the twinkling bright lights and sniff the wonderful scent that sent me to another world for hours until I fell asleep on the rug and by the next morning, I was back in my bed. Either it was Dad or Derek who carried me back to my bedroom.
Those were the simpler times. Funny how I thought it was the difficult time due to Kenzie’s death. But it looked like growing up is more complex than that one day or week you once thought was the oh-so worse time of your life. Too bad my oh-so worse time of my life is still haunting me.
Driving down the cleared road, Alex shifted in his seat. “There’s a mix CD I made for you. It’s in my bag behind your seat.”
A warm smile appeared on my face. I loved his mix CDs’. They were always filled with such incredible songs that left me to listening to them late at nights when I was thinking of him.
I stretched my body to the back seat, fiddling with the zipper of his beat-up book bag; I was able to find the CD.
Chuckling loudly, after reading the title of the cd, I kissed his cheek.
‘Merry Christmas, Kiss My Ass’
Typical Alex. Of course he’d make me this.
“Hmm, I don’t think kissing your ass sounds so appealing.” I retorted with my nose scrunched.
His laugh boomed through the car, contagious as ever, I laughed along with him.
Here I sat: frightened to meet his parents, but he had me laughing.
I loved this moment with maximum pinnacle my heart would ever let me. He had me on a drug that was harmless and interjected into me painlessly. Words couldn’t possibly express of the emotion I felt all in my body. Alex had my heart in his hands and that didn’t scare me, only because I loved him and he loved me back. If there would be ever a time that we lost each other, surely I’d lose my mind and have physical pains surging from my heart.
But I couldn’t see that happening at all. My bond with Alex was like a magnetic that was alluring and captivating.
My hand slipped into his, knowing that he was hiding his nervous emotions. I tried to do the simple things with comforting him. It was all a natural thing.
The road ahead of his was turning more narrow and thinner. The pavement turned into gravel, it crumbled beneath the tires of the car.
The scenery was more rural and nothing but empty land and woods.
Far away, a tiny house appeared. Driving closer, the house doubled in size. There were Christmas lights dangling everywhere, fake Santa’s and reindeer, and light up snowmen.
My heart beat picked up when we took a stop. The house was built beautifully with brick. It was the typical cookie cutter house – red front door and oak wood porch, white picket fence, and two stories.
Before Alex pulled out the keys in the ignition, he gave my hand a small but reassuring squeeze.
“Are you okay?” He asked.
“Yeah, are you?”
“I’m only okay because you’re here with me.” He heavily sighed.
My chest tightened from his sweet words. Knowing that I impacted him that much made me my love for him build higher, like that was even possible.
I adore his phenomenal strength and bravery to see his parents after a year of not seeing them. Even if I still don’t know exactly why that is, I’m going to stand by his side no matter what.
We hesitantly walked to the porch hand in hand. I could hear Christmas music blasting from the inside. We both took careful glances at each other right before Alex knocked on the door.
Immediately, the music took a quick stop.
My eyes wander everywhere besides the door that will soon greet me to his parents. I squeezed on Alex's hand so tightly that for a second I thought it might break, but he didn't seem to mind at all.
Moments like these just make me realize of how much I’m willingly to go out of my comfort zone for Alex.
The door swung open; there stood a smiling brunette woman. She wore one of those ugly Christmas sweaters and white jeans. I could perfectly see the resemblance she had with Alex.
“Alex,” She smiled so widely. I didn’t think it was possible to stretch a smile like that.
She went in for a hug, embracing Alex to the point his back arched a little, and who already let go of my hand. I took notice of Alex unmoved arms while she had her arms wrapped around her son.
I stood there awkwardly. The sickness feeling crept up in the back of my throat and suddenly a wave of heat flowed through my body.
Alex cleared his throat, causing his mother to finally pull away.
That was when her big chocolate eyes landed on me. I gulped.
Her friendly smile was still on display when she pulled me in for a hug. “I’ve heard about you and never would have guessed I’d be able to meet you.” She said into my ear. “I’m Vivian by the way.”
Did Alex ever explain to them prior to this? That I’m mute?
God, I hated myself so much for this.
Once she pulled away from me, she allowed us to come into the house.
She spoke while we walked through there grand house but I was too much in a daze of awe to comprehend of what she was speaking of. The elegant paintings on the walls grabbed my attention until I looked up to see the tall ceilings.
We passed through the family room that was decorated with furniture that all together summed up to probably the cost of my own home. The Christmas tree they had was twelve feet tall and was beautifully decorated along with wrapped presents.
I’m snapped out of my thoughts when Vivian yelled out a name. “Danielle! Alex is here!”
At this point, we were in the kitchen that was fitted for a top rated chef. Magnificent it was – expensive looking oak cabinets and stainless steel appliances.
The smell of homemade cookies engulfed into my nostrils. It amazed me to see so many platters on the counters, all mounted with different types of desserts.
Alex stood next to a bar stool, watching his mother take a look at the turkey in the oven. He didn’t appear as nervous as I thought he would. It must be taking everything he has to mask his emotions.
“Alex!” A tiny voice screamed.
My head turned to the direction of the voice. Here came a little brown curly haired girl, running towards Alex with her petite arms reached out.
Alex bent down with a wide smile. It was the first I’ve seen him smile since we’ve been here.
His muscular arms wrapped around the little girl, who draped hers around his neck.
My heart swelled from the cuteness that was in front of me but my curiosity got the best of me. I never knew Alex had a little sister. She was too cute to even look at. She was dressed in an adorable Christmas theme outfit. Her tiny legs were in leggings that had snowflakes in the material.
They soon broke apart. Alex stood up and took her hand that made his hand look like it was belonged to a giant. “Danielle, this is Laila, my girlfriend.”
Danielle wrapped her arms around my leg. It always amazed me of how much love a little kid could have. It was like they have an unlimited supply of it.
She let go of me, her chocolate colored eyes stared back at me. “You’re very pretty, Laila.” She warmly said.
Younger kids seemed to be more out spoken and say what was on their mind – I remembered how much loved.
I had forgotten for a second where I was and who I was with until Alex’s mother chimed in. “There’s a few presents to be opened. Would any of you like wine?”
My breathing hitched at the sudden request to speak but luckily, Alex answered for the both of us.
“Uh, Laila and I are good.” He said.
Frowning, I watched his mother with a little more precise. She seemed lovely as far as I could tell. Her personality didn’t fit of what little information I was told by Alex.
But then again, even if you looked at my family, you’d see a loving one, but no one would be able to guess what happens behind closed doors. I think every one’s family is like that. Cookie cutter faked but real once no company is around to see what truly happens.
Alex’s dad showed up a minute later. He wore an ugly green sweater and tan khakis. He said a quick hello to me, mentioning his name was Robert.
“Want to look around? We have some time to kill.” Alex whispered.
I was eager to see the rest of the house. It was so large in size that I could get lost for hours.
We went through the whole downstairs. Christmas decorations were able to be found throughout the place.
The excitement in me grew more when we walked up the stairs. Alex’s pace slowed down more. The way his eyes wander to every detail of the upstairs.
I followed him to a door that I was predicting was his. Craved messy into the door, a sentence was engraved. ‘Do not enter’
Typical, I thought.
His hand reached for the doorknob while I stood silently behind him. There was a noticeable difference in his breathing – quicker and coming out of his mouth,
He cracked the door open, peaking through the slit. His once tensed shoulders loosened after getting a glance of his childhood room.
The door was now fully opened. He allowed me to walk in first. My eyes first landed on the blue race car bed. I giggled slightly from the sight of it. The whole room was painted in a dark blue. Even the curtains to his rather large window were a light blue to contrast the rest.
I spied a lot of band posters hung on the wall. From Blink 182 to New Found Glory, there were at least two dozen band posters plastered on one side of the four walls.
The door closed and I could feel him behind me, walking closer. “You know they’re faking that, right?” He said.
“I figured.”
“Well, at least Danielle isn’t. She always had been a sweetheart.” He sighed and dumped himself on his bed.
“Why did you never tell me about her?” I asked, sitting down right next to him. His arms snaked around me and his face laid on the crook of my neck.
“Hmmm, I don’t know. Never came up I guess.”
It was only one in the afternoon and I just wanted to be home, but home wasn’t home anymore. Derek hated me now and my relationship with my dad is too damaged to repair.
I felt guilty for ruining a family day but I had to do it for Alex. I really hope he realized the extent I went through to get here – to spend a Christmas with a family I hardly knew.
It only occurred to me that his parents knew about my impulsive behavior of getting on a bus to the city. I felt embarrassed that they knew. I wanted to be the girlfriend that they always hoped Alex would have. But it looked like I will never be just that. I was just the girl that had fallen for their son, and the girl that their son had fallen for. That’s what they only saw in me, I bet.
Vivian mentioned something about presents, I was empty handed. I felt like I should have brought something for them, but how the hell was I supposed to know when I didn’t know his family.
Speaking of presents, Alex and I both agreed not to get each other Christmas presents despite spending the day together. He was my Christmas present this year. He was all that I needed.
“What are you going to do with Derek?” He randomly asked.
His question jolted my brain. I never would have thought he’d ask that type of question. Truth be told, I had no clue of what I was going to do.
“If Caleb does anything to you, I swear, he’ll be in the hospital by the next hour.” He stated with a kiss on my temple.
There was no surprise coming from his threat. I knew all too well that Alex could do just that.
My mouth didn’t open to say anything more. We sat there in his dark room, watching the snow fall from the outside of his window. His hands gently rubbed against my back while my body leaned against his. I felt so emotionally drained and wanted nothing more to just fall asleep in his arms back in his apartment, where we could be alone with each other and have no complications.
“I love you.” Alex reminded me.
“I love you back.” I smiled contently.
This moment was what I longed for. Every time he said those three words, my heart could never endure the great pleasurable emotion. His sweet smile when he says those words and the way he looked at me changes my mood in a finger snap. He lights a fire in me that can never go out no matter what. From sunshine to a hurricane, my love for this beautiful man will forever continue.
Shortly, our moment hadn’t last very long. Vivian called our names from downstairs.
Vivian and Robert gifted us two tickets to a Green Day concert in February as we sat around the Christmas tree in the family room. I was bursting with joy inside of me but I knew better to not express it fully. Alex would have flipped if he got his hands on these tickets that were sold out months ago, but he showed nothing. Not even a smile or a thank you, just a curt nod.
Danielle couldn’t stop staring at me for some reason that I wish I knew. She was told multiple times by her mother to stop, but her attention kept leading her back to me. I honestly didn’t care that she was staring at me. She was a little kid, less than five years old, she didn’t know better.
Afterwards, Vivian went back into kitchen while we hung out in the family room. The Christmas music started back up and Danielle wanted Alex to play Barbie’s with her that she got for Christmas.
It was a grand sight to see Alex being so gentle and loving with Danielle.
“This one is Cindy, she’s evil.” Danielle referred to the red head doll.
“Oh?” Alex titled his head. “And why is she evil?”
I giggled from where I sat. Danielle help tremendously with not making this a hard day on Alex and helped with the future awkwardness I was about to suffer.
Dinner was just about to be served. I could tell by the strong smell of the turkey and corn bread filling the home.
My senses were indeed right. It was only a matter of minutes we were called into the dining room. The table was set with multiple spoons and forks for different entrees. Alex and I sat next each other while his parents sat across from us.
Vivian cooked all the typical Christmas meal food. It was beyond delicious and mouthwatering. Robert tried to make small talk with Alex, but Alex wouldn’t budge and gave off short responses.
It pained me to see Vivian’s sullen expression. I wasn’t supposed to be on her side of this war between their family but the way her shoulders slumped and her smile turning into a straight line. I tried to imagine what might be going on through her head. She wanted her family back. She wanted her oldest son to come back home, not live in an apartment.
I bet it kills her every month to pay for that apartment bill. I bet the whole apartment deal backed fired on her. She probably thought giving Alex an apartment for a little while might simmer down the anger that boiled between them over time. But it was obvious of how that turned out to be.
But all my assuming was doing me no good. I’m left in the dark of not knowing what happened between them, so at this point, it was best to stick with Alex and trust his words of what he’s already told me about his family.
Danielle rambled on about her pre-k class, stating she liked a little boy in her class. Alex’s head perked up when she said that. I think Alex had major protectiveness over his little sister that I was able to see than anyone else. It was adorable.
Vivian wiped the corner of her mouth with her napkin and then spoke, “Thank you Alex for coming home for today.”
Alex dipped his head down near his plate, picking at his food with his fork. “Yeah, sure.” He grumbled.
My hand moved to his thigh, pinching him for his rude behavior.
“We appreciate it, Alex. Maybe you can move –“ Vivian was cut off by him.
“In your dreams,” He shook his head.
This wasn’t the Alex I fell in love with. He was being impolite to his parents that only wanted to make things better. His anger side of him was creeping out in the worse way.
“Don’t speak to your mother like that, Alexander.” His father scowled at him.
The scene that was playing out left me vulnerable. This was dreadful.
“I can speak to her whatever way I want to.” Alex stared dead on into his father’s eyes. “This is all bullshit.”
“Alex! Watch your language!” His mother stood up in fury.
Alex did the same, standing up tall; he leaned against the table, resting his fists on the table. “What are you going to do? Ship me off to an apartment then a year later plead for me to come back?”
“We did it for your own good! We all know that you were a wreck after what happened to your brot-“ Vivian defended her self until Alex cut off her sentence.
“Fuck you!” He spat and took my hand.
He pulled me through the house, trudging along; we made it out to the freezing weather.
But right before the front door shut behind me, I heard a sob echoing through the house that I expected to be Vivian’s.
I didn’t say a word once we got into his car. Terrified if I did, he’d go off on me too. The thumbing of my throbbing heart filled my ears while the ice on the road crunched underneath the tires of the car. Alex’s heavy breathing and red face told me everything I already knew.
But I was awfully wondering what Vivian was about to say before Alex gone off. At this point, I deserved to know. Not because I was his girlfriend but because I cared and loved him.
The long drive back to his apartment was excruciating. I didn’t expect Alex to tell me why his family was torn into pieces right now, but he will soon whether he likes it or not.
I switched out into a sweater and sweatpants of Alex’s once I entered his bedroom of his non heated apartment. It felt good to be back somewhere more comfortable and where I felt safe.
Home.
My house wasn’t home. This apartment wasn’t home. Alex was home. No matter what condition Alex might be – angry, sad, or happy, he was still my home.
It’s when his arms wrap around me is when I feel the most safety I will ever feel.
I was cuddled in blankets on the couch, trying to stay warm. I was waiting for him to get out of the shower. His apartment was dull with no decorations. Not even one light was on. The only illumination was coming from the overcast weather from outside. His window left a shadow on the carpet, and the snow that was slowly falling did too. I stared down at the floor, watching the slow motion shadow. It was calming.
Finally, Alex showed up. He appeared calmer and had a movie in his hand. “It would be a crime to not watch this on Christmas.”
I nodded my head, not asking what it might possibly be.
He laid right next to me under the warm blankets with hot chocolate. He kissed me for a brief second and then went back to sipping his drink.
I would have never guessed what movie we were about to watch, but I nearly laughed my ass off when I realized we were going to watch Home Alone.
This Christmas was surely going down in history.
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a.n
I have so much homework :( Vote and comment bc I'm gonna need it to get through all the papers I have to write. Plus, we all know you have Lailex feels.
I believe there will be 9-ish chapters left! Who's excited!
Chapter dedication ;DaytimeNightmares (you win a free Jack Barakat)
-Kc Sep 6, 2014