Ambivalence - yoonseok

By tae-yum

97K 4.8K 2.3K

A troubled hybrid is forced by his sanctuary to live with Jung Hoseok, a lawyer who takes care of his friend... More

warnings/before statement
1 - y o o n g i
2 - j i m i n i e
3 - b i t c h
4 - m a l l
5 - a n x i e t y
7 - t h e_c o n t r a c t
8 - m e m o r i e s
9 - t o o_m a n y_e m o t i o N s
10- w h o's_h i s_d a d d y?
11- b a d_w o r d s
12- I ' m_s o r r y
13- u n w a n t e d
14 - y e s_m a s t e r
15 - n a m j o o n
16 - p a t c h w o r k
17 - n i g h t_n i g h t
18- s u r p r i s e s
19 - u n d e r s t a n d i n g
20 - c u r i o u s
21 - w e i r d
22- s a f e_s i g n a l
23- i m p r o v e m e n t
25- p r o m i s e
26 - f r i e n d s
27 - n o r m a l
28 - c o n f r o n t a t i o n
29- f i x e d
30- s w e e t
31- o u r_s t a r
32- s t o r m
33- a r g u m e n t
34- m a r t i n i
35- u n f a i r
36- c a r e g i v e r
37 - m o r n i n g
38- a t t a t c h m e n t
39- w a n t
40- c o n f u s i o n
41- h i s_s c e n t
41- h e a t
42- h e a t_p t 2
43- a f t e r m a t h
44- t o y
45- c l o s e
46- s m a l l e r
47- b o y f r i e n d

6 - e p i p h a n y

3.8K 155 96
By tae-yum

Unedited!!
....

As soon as Hoseok unlocked the front door, Yoongi bolted upstairs to his 'room', leaving a curious Hoseok behind.

He wanted to know what happened, what made Yoongi have a panic attack and why didn't he speak at all during the car ride.

The red haired male sighed exhaustedly, dropping the many shopping bags he held on to the floor in the living room. He could feel a head ache coming but he couldn't do anything about it now. Sure he had a lot to pout and whine about but sometimes, he had to put his own needs after others.

And that includes tending to the hybrid upstairs.

Hoseok let out a tired sigh and checked his phone as a text appeared.

-Jiminie Crickets 🐥🍼💞
Hey I just got a coupon for a buy one get one free pizza!!

-Jiminie Crickets 🐥🍼💞
Looks like we're having pizza tonight! Don't cook anything hobi

-Jiminie Crickets 🐥🍼💞
Im watchin u 🐥🔎👀

-me
Thanks chim 💞 xoxox

-me
I'll be waiting for my pizza 😋

-Jiminie Crickets 🐥🍼💞
:3

Hoseok shut off his phone and began to walk upstairs.

When he entered Yoongi's room, (since the hybrid probably forgot to close the door) he saw the raven haired boy sitting in a corner, head shoved into his knees. He wasn't sure if the hybrid was crying or if he was just sitting there, so he decided to speak.

"Yoongi? Do you want to talk?

"Fuck off." He groaned, forcing his head deeper into his knees.

"If this is about earlier, you don't need to be embarrassed. Jimin used to have panic attacks all the time. And they didn't stop until he started talking about them." Hoseok walked over to the corner Yoongi was in and sat back against the wall next to him.

"I'm fine-"

"No you're not."

Yoongi didn't reply to him. He only kept his ears to his head and face pressed into his knees, trying feel some sort of comfort from doing so. Small spaces sometimes made Yoongi feel better, and it was partly because he used to be kept in a cage illegally by the hybrid sanctuary. (It's also an orphanage.)

Hoseok let out a sigh and placed an arm around him, causing him to flinch from the sudden contact. The human quickly retracted his arm and gave a small smile to Yoongi, deciding that maybe he just needed to be alone.

So he stood up and went back downstairs, to finish unpacking the bags from the mall.


.............


"Hobi! Jiminie brought pizza!"

Hoseok grinned as his little clumsily stumbled into the room, hands holding the promised boxes of pizza. Jimin for some reason, had a co-worker who always had coupons to restaurants. And the boy obviously took advantage of it.

The little's tail wagged furiously and hit Hoseok in the leg. He was actually quite happy that Jimin went back into little space again. If he was being honest, he was kinda scared that maybe Jimin wouldn't slip back into little space but he stood corrected.

"I paid a dollar extra for sausage and jalapeno toppings because Minnie knows how much you love 'em!"

"You're right baby! You're such a good boy," Hoseok cooed, rubbing the wolf's ears as he sat the boxes on the kitchen table. "You've been staying out of trouble lately too, Minnie."

"Yes! Jiminie wanna cuddle with Hobi tonight so he was very good." The hybrid leaned into his touch as he continued to pet his head.

"Of course, sweetheart." Hoseok would admit that he was whipped for his little fur ball.

Jimin grinned brightly and moved to the cabinets to gather some plates before freezing. "Um....is Yoongi hyung eating too?"

Hoseok shrugged while pulling out something to drink from the fridge. "He's kind of distraught right now. We'll just save him some in case he decides to come down."

Jimin nodded and finished grabbing two SpongeBob plates from his 'little cabinet'. Which was a cabinet full of little space things he needed; like sippy cups, plates, and even bottles.

The two ended eating the pizza happily while watching Teen Beach Movie together. Hoseok laughed every time Jimin bursted into singing along with the characters in the movie. He even gasped and got mad when Lela fell for Brady instead of Tanner, and complained that "Lela and Tanner are meant to be!" Hoseok just watched his little with a loving smile.

His relationship with Jimin was more platonic than he would like it to be. There was a time where Hoseok had a crush on Jimin, back when Jimin first moved in. (Unlike Yoongi, Jimin wasn't adopted out of a hybrid sanctuary.) When he had first seen the cute and bubbly hybrid, Hoseok fell for him instantly. Jimin was Hoseok's first male crush, so Hoseok was questioning his sexuality and trying to understand his feelings.

Jimin had told him he was a little after three months of living with him. Hoseok however, already knew a bit about Caregiver and Little relationships since he was familiar with the BDSM community. He accepted the younger with open arms, cared for him, babied him and made him feel all types of love. That is until Jimin found Jungkook and Taeyhung and Hoseok was rejected when he confessed his feelings for the little.

Jimin put him down easily, saying that he had already found a potential love interest and that he only seen Hoseok as a friend/caregiver.

Hoseok was heart broken, but quickly got over his feelings when he figured out he loved Jimin more as a friend than a lover. They settled things without any awkwardness and Hoseok agreed to be Jimin's caregiver. Now they had a friendship that was unbreakable.

The movie came to an end with Jimin in tears because Mack and Brady had to go back home and leave Lela and Tanner. Honestly the plot of the movie was pretty dry but Jimin liked it anyway.

"What movie do you want to watch now, bud?" Hoseok asked as he cleaned up their trash from the snacks and pizza. He watched Jimin rubbed his eyes with a small pout, making grabby hands at him.

"Wanna cuddle wif' Hobi," he whined tiredly, crawling himself onto Hoseok's lap and resting his head on the older's chest.

Hoseok chuckled before grabbing the blanket resting on the couch and wrapping it around them, making himself comfortable.

Jimin felt content. He felt all his stress leave immediately. It felt good to be held every once and a while. To lean on someone's shoulder and feel comforted and loved, a feeling he never got as a hybrid child. So he wrapped his arms around Hoseok's waist, the other male wrapping his arms around Jimin's lower back, and the two quietly fell to sleep.

............

Yoongi drew in a deep breath after washing his face with some cold water from the bathroom sink.

He couldn't stop thinking about what had happened in the mall. And the more he thought about it, the more he felt uneasy. Uneasy because he had embarrassed himself in front of a bunch of people. Uneasy because he felt like all he was being was a burden. Uneasy because....Hoseok hadn't signed the the paperwork needed to keep Yoongi.

Yoongi didn't want to go back to the sanctuary. No one liked him, he was constantly by himself, and he couldn't face the fact that he was tired of being alone.

Most hybrids are able to go out and live on their own when they turn 18. They are provided an apartment in a hybrid populated area so that they'd feel more comfortable. They'd often send them off with a nice check and a pamphlet of jobs hiring hybrids so that they can adjust to life outside the sanctuary.

However, Yoongi was a special case.

Since he was three, he was deemed as a "danger to civilization", because of what they said "his temper and actions are not of normal hybrids like him." Yoongi didn't see anything wrong with him, but apparently everyone else did.

Except for his old master.

Anyway, in order for Yoongi to be able to have an outside-of-the-sanctuary life, he'd have to find an caretaker. Someone who can watch over him and make sure he's not disturbing the peace of the world and make sure he takes his medicine and attends his monthly therapy sessions.

Yoongi's 25 now, which means he was waiting for 7 years to be free and for someone genuine come around and accept him. A couple of people tried to be his caretakers, and he's been through different types of scenarios. Like hybrid traffickers, people who wanted to keep him as a slave, and much more.

But Hoseok seemed different.

He seemed to genuinely be interested in Yoongi and all Yoongi has been doing is being a burden. Arguing and bad mouthing, talking about and hurting Jimin's feelings. All things that no one would want to be around.

Yoongi can't help it, though. All his life he was feared and talked about for an unknown reason. Something that everyone knew but not him. It often hurt his self confidence when he thinks too much about it, which he tried not to do. He usually channels his pain and sadness into anger. It just seemed easier to handle it that way.

As of now, Hoseok was given a total of two weeks as a trial period with Yoongi. If he decided he wanted to keep him, then he would sign the paperwork and mail it back to Daegu. If not, he would simply have to give the sanctuary district a call and they'll have Yoongi back in Daegu by the next day.

The hybrid stared at his reflection in the mirror, dark hair stuck out everywhere and black ears laid down on his head. He didn't cry, no, he wouldn't cry over something like that. But he did feel a bit upset. He sighed and dried his face with a towel. He felt like he needed to apologise. Though he also felt like he did nothing wrong, he still felt guilty for certain things.

Yoongi ran a hand through his hair as he walked down the steps of the condominium. He immediately picked up on the smell of pizza and then Jimin's scent. He hadn't become familiar enough with the hybrid to know his scent but he could recognize whenever the scents in the condo change.

Once he walked fully into the living room, he saw the two figures cuddled up on the couch in a blanket, presumably asleep with the hybrid on the human's chest. They seemed comfortable and Yoongi didn't want to interrupt them so he just sat down silently on the other end of the couch and stole slice of pizza from the box next to him. He then turned on some Lifetime movie and leaned against the arm of the couch.

After about a half hour of watching some crazy chick stab her friend, he got bored.  Unconsciously, his eyes slowly traveled to Hoseok and Jimin, who were still asleep and cuddling, making Yoongi grimace in disgust.

Affection was something he had always witnessed but hardly ever felt. He didn't like people touching him, the thought of being cuddled or hugged may seem comforting to others but Yoongi just thought it was uncomfortable and strange. He also always thought that maybe it was because no one dared to ever attempt to touch him so that's why he was closed off, but he also always thought that maybe it's just how he sees things.

Maybe that's why people think he's weird.

Hoseok groaned, bringing him out of his thoughts. The human shifted slightly, before his eyes opened a bit. The hybrid on top of him nuzzled his head against the chest under him, unconsciously scenting Hoseok while doing so.

Hoseok sat up slowly while holding Jimin. He then seen Yoongi staring at them with an unreadable expression before the hybrid turned back to the television.

He frowned, a bit confused at where Yoongi had come from before shrugging it off. "Hobi...." He glanced down at his chest to see Jimin waking up a bit, pouting. "Hobi said...cuddle wif' Minnie..." The little tightened his loose grip on Hoseok's waist.

The latter sighed and made his way to get up, holding the hybrid as said hybrid clinged to him. "We're still going to cuddle, Jiminie. I'm just going to move us to my room, mkay?" Jimin let out a whine, pressing his face into the redhead's neck. Yoongi rose his eye brows at this.

Hybrids did things differently than humans. For example, Jimin placing his face into Hoseok's neck seemed pretty normal to humans. However to hybrids, that type of affection is something hybrids use to signal to their mate to MARK them. Marking comes after or during mating. So that's why Yoongi was caught off guard at first.

But of course the action could also show nothing but platonic cuddling or even that the half wolf was nearing his heat.

Heat.

Yoongi made a mental note to ask Hoseok where'd he put his heat medicine.

The black haired male watched the two go upstairs before he leaned over and snatched the blankets they were using and covered himself up. Yoongi fell asleep easily, and it was probably because his body was tired from all of the events from today.

..........

In the morning, Yoongi was woken up by a shy but very cute looking Jimin.

The little had on a light blue sweater with little white space ships scattered across the fabric and above that were a pair of short cut navy blue overalls. Decorating his legs all the way to his knees were like blue stockings with navy blue stars on them. To top of his outfit, Jimin had on a black leather choker with a small bell on the end. Together with his messy hair and paint stained face and fingers, he looked absolutely adorable and he had to thank his wonderful caregiver for putting the look together.

"U-um....Hobi hyung said to w-wake you up for brweakfast." The little hybrid said sheepishly, not looking at Yoongi's sour expression.

"What the hell are you wearing?" He couldn't help it. Yoongi couldn't help but make fun of the weird outfit the little had on. Even if it was a cute outfit, it was just abnormal for a male to wear such a femine outfit.

Yoongi sat up on the couch and rubbed his face while watching Jimin rocking back and fourth on his heels before stopping.

"H-hobi said go eat." And with that, the hybrid ran upstairs, away from the sharp glares and judging stares of the older hybrid.

Yoongi huffed in annoyance. He hated this 'wake up at the ass crack of dawn' sleep schedule. He treasured his sleep dearly since it's the only place he can get away from the world, even if that means having two or three nightmares between naps. He always had nightmares, nothing new to him.

Sluggishly, he stood up from the warmth of the couch and headed to the kitchen on wobbly feet.

The ravenette plopped in a stool by the kitchen island. He tilted his head to see in front of Hoseok who was standing in front of the cabinets taking stuff out of it. He watched as the red head dug into a grocery bag and sighed when he couldn't find something he was looking for.

He turned around and screamed when he saw Yoongi sitting at the island. Yoongi jumped like three feet in the air and screamed because Hoseok had screamed.

The two stared at each other, one had a glare while the other looked confused.

"When did you come in here?" Hoseok asked once his heart had calmed.

"I just walked in here. Jimin said you had food."

Hoseok nodded, walking over to the microwave and taking a plate from out of it. He sat it in front of Yoongi who immediatly dug in. It was nothing but a Korean style omelette which consisted of tofu with seasoned soy sauce, rice cooked with red and black beans, radish kimchi (kaktugi), and Korean coleslaw. It was quite a common meal in south korea since they don't really have breakfast food like America. What koreans eat for breakfast, they also eat for lunch and dinner.

Hoseok watched the hybrid eat before the raven haired male froze and his ears fell to his head. He slowly turned around to see Hoseok staring at him with an amused smile and blushed lightly from embarrassment.

"Um, thank you for preparing this meal. I will eat it gratefully." Yoongi kept his eyes on the floor, mouth still full of food as he had said that. He gave Hoseok, who was shocked at the use of formal speech, a small bow before returning to his food.

The red head stared at him for a moment.

Another moment.

Before he slowly turned back to the kitchen cabinets. He was planning on having a play date with Taehyung and Jungkook and possibly get a chance to talk to the two of them and see what was going on with their lives. He even asked Jimin, and both little and big Jimin thought it would be a good idea to meet up with the two. Plus it's been a while since he saw little Tae and Kookie.

Jimin and Jungkook were littles, Taehyung was a switch when it came to little space. Though no one knew that. He had decided to hide his little spacd when he first found out about it. He didn't want to cause the littles to feel like he didn't want to be their caregiver anymore. And he didn't want to cause anyone more stress, since the littles so far were already chaotic and bratty sometimes.

Hoseok looked over his ingredients he had laid out on the countertop. He had all the things to make sugar cookies but he forgot to get icing at the store. He had planned for the littles to play and then they'd bake and decorate cookies together. It was also a small excuse to get Jungkook and Jimin to talk to each other. Hoseok was upset that the youngest was ignoring his Jimin but decided to leave the situation to them. He would only help bring them together.

He turned around and grabbed his car keys off the island. "I'm heading to the store, I'll be back in a bit." He told to Yoongi before leaving.

Yoongi didn't say anything, he just ate his food silently. He finished his food and was about to walk over to the bathroom and take a shower when he heard a sound go off.

His sharp eyes flicked to the square object sitting on the kitchen island. Hoseok's phone.

It kept ringing and vibrating until Yoongi picked it up. But it was still ringing and vibrating.

Because he had no knowledge about phones.

He stared at the device and blindly took a guess on the what to do by pressing the green button on the screen. Soon, he heard a small voice speak.

"Hyung? I wanted to tell you that me and Taehyungie are coming soon! A-and we brought candy! Lots of candy!" The slightly high pitched voice then goes away to talk to someone in the background. "Hyungie, are we there yet!?" The voice in the background says something Yoongi didn't hear.

"Ah, hyung the traffic is horrible!" The boy in the phone pouted. "It'll take forever to get there and Kookie- I mean, I won't have enough patience." If Hoseok was on the phone, he would've noticed the obvious signs of his friend almost going into little space.

"Anyway bye! We'll see you soon!" And the call ended.

Yoongi gasped.

"How....how did he get in there?" He muttered to himself, staring at the phone in his hand. It intrigued him. He's only ever held a phone once and that was when Hoseok let him play a game on it. Other times he's seen people use them and talk to them but he never knew how to work the device.

"Hello?" He asked the boy in the phone. The boy didn't reply.

Yoongi asked again, "Hello? How'd you get in there?"

Still no reply.

Yoongi frowned. What happened to the boy? Had he left? Did he ever find his hyung he was calling for? Or maybe the boy didn't want to talk to him? He didn't know. The hybrid who suddenly became desperate for answers, set the phone back on the island. He then waited for the familiar ringing to start so that he could talk to the boy.

"I will help get you out of there. Just you wait." He said rather confidently as he sat in his chair and stared at the phone.

He ended up waiting ten minutes for the phone to ring again, which it didn't. Yoongi would pick up the phone and watch the screen light up or turn it upside down to see if the boy would fall out of it. He even attempted to talk to the phone, yelling at it to bring the boy back. It went on like this for another fifteen minutes until he heard the front door open and saw Hoseok walk in.

"Hey Yoongi, what are you doing?" He had asked when he seen the hybrid holding his phone tightly and staring intently at it.

"The phone won't bring back the boy, Hoseok. I tired to negotiate with it but it's playing hard to get." Yoongi growled out, glaring at the device.

Hoseok frowned. "What boy?" He sat his grocery bags on the island.

"The boy in the phone!" Yoongi said as if it was so obvious. "He was saying that he was on his way here and then talked about candy and then he was gone! And now the phone won't give him back."

Hoseok stared at Yoongi questioningly, though for a second, and then held back a laugh. Jungkook must've called, he figured.

"Yoongi it's called a phone call. People can use their phones to call each other when they're apart. They've been around for decades. How do you not know what it is?" Hoseok chuckled a bit at the cuteness of the hybrid.

"I've been at the sanctuary all my life. In a cage for most of the time." Yoongi muttered, still staring at the phone.

"I thought it was illegal to cage hybrids?"

Yoongi shrugged.

Hoseok frowned once again before pulling out the ingredients he had for the treats he wanted to make. "Do you want me to call him back?"

Yoongi's ears perked up. "You can do that?"

"Of course," Hoseok grabbed his phone from Yoongi and dialed Jungkook's number. It went straight to voicemail which made Hoseok roll his eyes. Jungkook was probably in the middle of a game of Subway Surfers to answer.

"He's not answering but you can play some games on it if you'd like?" Hoseok's said. He thought it was kind of weird and out of the ordinary for Yoongi to be so chill today. He hadn't caught an attitude or made a nasty comment yet. At least not to him.

He gave the phone back to Yoongi who stared at it once again. Surely Yoongi knew how to read, right?

Hoseok helped him find Cut The Rope and the hybrid began playing it, getting immersed in the game. He couldn't help but think it was kind of concerning that Yoongi didn't know common things in daily life. Like using a phone. And now he was starting to think that maybe Yoongi didn't know how to read either.

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