I was sitting on the couch in my dance clothes, mindlessly watching 'The Office', when my mom sat next to me. I didn't even look at her, still in a trance from this morning's events.
"Hey sweetie," she gently tapped my shoulder. I turned my head slowly to her, my puffy cheeks and red eyes still in full effect. "Ricky called, and rehearsal is canceled tonight. He said Gavin proposed last night, and they're meeting up with family tonight." She was clearly excited, and I let a smile slip.
"That's so great." I managed to say, still wanting to cry.
"Go talk to him. It's 5:30, it's been a few hours. I'm sure he's calmed down by now. You'll work through this." She kissed my hair and went back to the kitchen. I reluctantly stood up and grabbed my purse. I walked out to the car and drove to his house, in a trance. Sitting in his driveway, I realized I made a terrible mistake. I'm sure he hasn't told his family, and even if he had, I can't just show up here. He has three siblings, and it's a Sunday night, I'm sure they had plans. I started to pull out of the driveway when Tyler came outside. I parked the car and rolled down my window as he approached me.
"I know what happened, don't worry." He rested his arms on the car door.
"I just don't think I can go in there. It's too rude, I'm sure you all have plans." I shook my head, coming up with every possible reason not to go in.
"Maddie, come in. The girls are at the park with our parents, for at least another hour. Travis is in his room, come on." He opened my door and I dragged myself out. I made my way up the stairs and looked in the open bedroom door. Travis was laying in his bed, blaring music, and tossing a ball up and down, letting it hit the ceiling and then fall back to the bed. Thump, thump, thump. "He's been doing this for three hours." Tyler whispered to me as he walked to his room. I took a deep breath, and knocked on the door.
"Can I come in?" I asked quietly.
"Mads?" He looked up and paused the music. I nervously looked around the room, and he sat up and nodded. I made my way in and sat at his desk in his rolling chair. I lightly swayed in the seat, waiting for him to speak. Thump, thump, thump. It had to have been a solid five minutes before either of us said anything-and of course, it was at the same time.
"Can we please talk?"
"What happened earlier?"
I bit my lip nervously, and tried to contain my laughter- something Travis failed at. His infectious laugh only made me tentatively crack a smile, catching his attention. He motioned for me to sit with him and he scooted over. I sat down next to him, and eased myself against the backboard.
"I didn't want this to happen." He grabbed my hand and started playing with my fingers, signaling to me that he had calmed down.
"Neither did I, but it did." I sighed, realizing I hadn't calmed down yet. He quickly noted this, and lifted my chin up with his index finger. I looked into his beautiful deep blue eyes, and he looked concerned. His lips were trying to form a smile, but just couldn't, his facials were soft, compared to his usual smirks and winks, he seemed upset.
"I'm so sorry I yelled at you earlier. I love you so much, and trust you more than anything." He lowered his tone, and rubbed his thumb on the palm of my hand.
"If you trusted me, you wouldn't have gotten mad. It hasn't been easy on me. Every time you're around, I limit my contact with him. You're the one who told me to go take our picture, which he changed the pose because he didn't want you to feel awkward. Even after all that though, you still get mad because he lives across the street and I talk to him?" I barely looked up at him. I didn't know what I was saying at this point, I was just trying to make a point.
"You're right. You are one hundred percent right. I'll work on it, I promise. I'm sorry." He kissed my hair and I finally made eye contact with him. I was still really upset, and I didn't think this was a "I'll work on it" situation. This never should have happened, because who I'm friends with shouldn't affect my boyfriends life. Part of me wanted to end it right there, and tell him it's over. Tell him that he doesn't have to work on it, because he doesn't have to see me again. Most of me knew that doing that would be a mistake.
"Okay."
I got back home, and saw Brianna sitting on my porch. I walked over to her and sat down next to her.
"Zack told me you and Travis got in a fight. I just wanted to make sure you were okay." She explained without me even asking why she was there. I leaned my head on her shoulder and let out a deep sigh.
"I was just at his house. We talked, it's whatever."
"It's not whatever, Mads. Zack said he was yelling at you in the driveway." Brianna shook her head.
"Yeah, but it's fine now. He apologized, said he'd try to be okay with me and Zack being friends, I didn't think it was worth going through that fight anymore. It took so much out of me Bri." I shrugged as I rubbed my puffy eyes.
"Right, but what if it happens again?" Brianna asked, clearly concerned. She was right, but that was the last thing I wanted to think about.
"I don't know. I'm just really over this whole thing and I don't want to have to deal with it anymore." I sighed again. She could tell I was getting annoyed, so she dropped it.
"Do you wanna have movie night tonight?" She changed the subject, and I was beyond relieved.
"More than anything." I nodded and she stood up.
"Great, I'll be back in twenty." She started to walk away.
"Where are you going?" I asked her as she got in her car.
"Pajamas are a necessity for movie night!"
After watching 'To All the Boys I've Loved Before', Brianna and I sat on the couch finishing our popcorn.
"I just don't understand why he didn't take the scrunchie back!" I half shouted half laughed at Brianna.
"Because he is Peter Kavinsky! He can do what he wants!" She argued back and I shoved a handful of popcorn in my mouth.
"Whatever!" I rolled my eyes and we walked to the door. "Thank you for this. I really needed it." I gave her a hug and she smiled.
"Of course girlie. I'm your relationship counselor since day one." She thought back to when Zack got eliminated and we had a sleepover with a movie fort. I gave her another hug and she was on her way.
As usual, waking up Monday morning was one of the hardest things to do. I threw on a pair of black leggings, my blue ivory Ella tee shirt, a pair of converse and threw my hair up in a ponytail as I ran down the stairs. I barely made it out the door on time. I gave my mom a quick hug goodbye, and ran to my car. I put the key in, turned it into position, and nothing happened. I tried again, and my car wouldn't turn on. I rested my head against the steering wheel and let out a small scream. I got out of the car and opened my hood, quickly realizing I had no idea what I was doing.
"Need some help?" Zack shouted from across the street, making his way over. I sighed and looked at my house.
"I'll have my dad fix it real quick, thanks." I brushed him off and pulled out my phone. 6:57. I was going to be beyond late if I waited for my dad to realize he didn't know what he was doing either. I looked back at Zack. "Do you know anything about cars?"
"Lots." He winked and came over to the hood of the car. He stood close to me, and I hesitated to move out of his way, wanting to stay next to him. I fought against the urge and stepped to the side of the car as he examined the car.
"I can fix this," Zack started and I lightly smiled, relived. "But it'll take time. Something you and I both don't have right now." He finished the news, and I ran my hand over my hair. I let out a huffy breath and lightly tapped my foot, trying to think of solutions.
"Okay, I figured. I'll go get my dad and we'll go drop it off at a mechanic. I'll meet you at school. Thanks for trying." I grabbed my backpack out of the car and started to walk away. He grabbed my bag and pulled me back to him, and managed to turn me around, six inches away from his face. He was looking down at me, smirking and staring with his smooth brown eyes. I bit my lip and glanced up at him. He removed his hand from my bag and lightly held my wrist. I immediately got goosebumps, and almost instantly regretted the moment. I slowly moved my arm away and adjusted my backpack.
"I meant, I could give you a ride and fix it after school." He offered and I smiled.
"Thank you." I got into Zack's pickup truck and we were on our way to school. I ran my fingers along the patched seats. He kept stealing looks over at me and let out a little laugh.
"Yeah, it's no Mustang, but she gets the job done."
"No, I love it. It's just not what I'd imagine you'd be driving your senior year." I explained and he nodded.
"This was my dad's car when I was born. He always wanted this to be my first car, so he took care of it and now it's mine. Going strong, twenty years." He told me the story and I smiled. We sat in silence for a little while, as we sat in the traffic in front of the school, I thought about Travis. I didn't know how to face him, and how to act like everything was okay. I was still upset, but I knew even if I wasn't, something was still off. "Have you talked to him since yesterday?" Zack asked me, almost like he was reading my mind.
"Yeah, I went over to his house last night." I shrugged and shifted uncomfortably in my seat.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. That was awkward, wasn't it?" He sensed my discomfort and I forced a small laugh. "I'm sorry."
"It's cool, don't worry about it." I brushed it off and he looked at me.
"Not just about that. I'm sorry I made a mess out of everything between you and Travis. I knew when you moved back, things weren't going to be the same between us, no matter how badly I wanted them to be. I found out you had a boyfriend, and I knew I had no chance of us getting back together, but I still wanted us to be friends. Maybe I pushed it too far, and if I did I'm so sorry because that wasn't fair to Travis, and it especially wasn't fair to you. Maybe I'm starting to like you again, and maybe that's why I didn't stop trying to be close with you. I heard you guys arguing yesterday, and I know he was mad that we were friends again, and I get it if you don't want to be around me anymore. I'm sorry." He confessed as the light turned green and cars honked at us. I didn't say anything as he pulled into the schools parking lot. I wasn't mad, not at all. I was confused at first, why he felt the need to tell me all of this, and I didn't care much that he said any of that. I realized that Zack honestly had nothing to do with our problems. This was between me and Travis. The car stopped and I unbuckled and started to get out of the car. "Mads?" Zack called after me as I closed the door. I walked towards the school and Zack grabbed my wrist and turned me around, again. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be. It's not your fight or your fault. I have to go do something. I'll see you in class." I walked into the school, and headed to my locker. I saw Travis standing there, waiting for me like normal. Something told me today wasn't going to be normal though.
"Hey baby." He wrapped his arms around me and I hesitated before hugging him back, and slowly grabbed my things from my locker. I had mustered up the courage to get there and now I couldn't even turn around to face him. Tears boiled in my eyes and I let out a deep breath. I felt his hand touch my waist. "Is everything okay?" I shook my head no as a tear fell. "Mads, what happened?" Travis placed his hand on my shoulder and another tear fell. "Was it Zack? Did he say something?" I inhaled sharply and looked down at my converse. My voice cracked as I spoke.
"I think we need to take a break."