Chapter 86
Moving day, great.
Yesterday I had informed the paps about what was going on in my life, and about Harry. I woke up this morning and it was all over every magazine cover, every website, and even the tv. I also woke up to the smell of smoke.
"What's that smell?" I asked quietly, as Alyssa walked into the room, handing me a cup of tea.
"The movers are here, putting stuff in their truck. Then they're gonna put it on some plane or boat or something, and we're off!" She smiled.
"How much do they smoke in a day?" I asked, and slowly sat up to take a sip of the hot tea.
"I don't know." She laughed. "Get dressed soon, our flight leaves at five, so we'll leave here around four."
"What time is it?" I asked before she left the room again.
"Noon, the girls are getting lunch."
Noon? Lunch? It's that late already?
I thought about Harry and if he had seen any of my little speech about never wanting to see him again. But I thought about it, and I started caring less and less. He hurt me, and I could never take him back because of what he had done, even if I wanted to. He hadn't even tried texting or calling me since the hospital, and I was getting a little bit worried. Louis mentioned he hadn't seen him in a while.
I'm sure he's fine. And I'll be fine... but it will take time because whenever I'll look at my kids, I'll see him, and only him. Even Cassidy looked like him... she had the same bright green eyes. Which is why I'm so upset, but I have to force myself to move on. I can never go back to him because of what he did to me, and how he left me.
I got out of bed, and hopped over to my wheelchair, sitting down in it, and wheeling myself into the kitchen. Alyssa was making eggs, and I said hello to the moving guys before going over to her.
"Hey so how are we-" I started, but squeals from the front door cut me off.
"We're home!" Hailey's voice traveled through the small apartment.
"Oh, sorry!" Lucy laughed, and stepped to the side so the movers could somehow fit a couch out the front door.
"We got lunch." Alli smiled at me, and put the to-go bags on the counter.
"Okay, what were you saying?" Alyssa laughed.
"How are we getting their cars there?" By their cars, I meant Alli and Lucy's because Hailey never needed a car, since she just always drove Alli or Lucy's, I still didn't have a car, and Alyssa never had one. In New York, you didn't need a car unless you had small children, because you either walked or took a cab everywhere you went.
"We're shipping them." Alyssa answered. Alyssa still lived with her mom the last time I knew, and she was moving out for the first time. She still refused to get a car though, and she said she would use Lucy or Alli's. I, on the other hand, needed a car and it was the first thing I was going to do when I got there. Cabs could get really expensive, and since I'm having two kids, I needed all the money I could save. And a car.
I grabbed a small sandwich off the counter and wheeled myself back into the room I was staying in. I got up, hopped over to my dresser, and started getting dressed into better clothes.
When I was finished getting ready and eating, it was already one. I wheeled back out into the main part of the apartment, and Hailey was sitting down on the couch next to Alli, laughing at something.
"Where are Lucy and Alyssa?" I asked, looking around, and crossing the room to them.
"I don't know, they kind of just left." Hailey shrugged, and I told them I'd be back soon. I wheeled out of the apartment and past the moving guys, and down the hall to the elevator. I got on, pressed the button for the lobby, and waited.
I pulled out my phone, and called Alyssa. The elevator dinged, and I got out as the phone was ringing. As I was going to the door to go outside, I ended the call and looked up.
"Hey where were you-" I started talking talking to Alyssa and Lucy as they walked through the door, but I stopped when I saw who was behind them.
"Why are you all here?" I asked the four guys.
"Because Harry's missing." Louis responded, and my stomach flipped.
"What do you mean he's missing? Where is he? Why would-" I quickly shut my mouth as soon as I realized I shouldn't care about him.
But I do, and I always will.
"We haven't seen him since he moved back into your place." Liam said.
"So we're going to find him, and that's why we brought them here to help." Alyssa looked down at me.
"Why? Why did you being them here?" I asked them.
"We thought you-"
"You thought wrong." I cut Lucy off. "I'm not helping you look for him, you can find him yourself. I never want to see him again."
"You've made that pretty clear." Zayn breathed.
"We're going to help them look." Alyssa motioned to the guys and then looked behind me.
"We are too." Alli said, and I turned around to see her and Hailey standing there.
"What?" I almost laughed.
"We're serious." Niall crossed his arms.
"Fine." I shrugged. "I am too. Have fun searching, and I'll meet you at the airport." I waved to them, and turned around to get back on the elevator.
How was I going to get to the airport?
That was actually the least of my worries right now. Of course I wanted Harry to be okay, but I couldn't see him. I couldn't give in and let him win me over again.
But I had to know he was okay.
I pulled out my phone again, and quickly texted Louis.
*Check the bar on White Horse road.*
I said, because out of everyone, I knew him the best, and if he hadn't checked there, that's where he would be. That was the bar he always drank at, because it was the first bar he had taken me to after I ran out of gas in Liam's car, and I had my first encounter with the paps there.
I could tell Louis had read it, but he didn't respond. I waited and waited, and went back up to the apartment. The movers had left, and it looked so sad, alone, and empty. Like me.
After forty five minutes, my phone rang and I immediately answered it.
"Did you find him?" I quickly asked, even though I shouldn't care.
"Yeah, but he's asking where you are, and he's refusing to leave." Niall said.
"Is he drunk?" I asked.
"Um... well, he's like... y- yeah, he's drunk." Niall sighed, and I heard glass breaking in the background.
"Where is she?!" I heard Harry yell, and my heart leaped. My heart ached for him, and all I wanted was to be in his arms, and fall asleep next to him again, and have that last forever. But I couldn't. He hurt me, in every way possible, and I had to let him go.
"Please come here, Ariana." Niall begged.
"No." I couldn't bring myself to. If I went back, I would never leave.
"Well I have something that might change your mind." He sighed.
"What?" I asked eagerly.
"I didn't want to tell you because I shouldn't be the one to-"
"Niall." I cut him off.
"Fine." He sighed. "Before the hospital incident, and before he found out about the pregnancy, he got another tattoo."
"Of what?" I grew worried.
"You."
"W- what?" It felt like I had stopped breathing.
"It's on his shoulder, in the same place yours is of that guitar." He said and I felt like crying. His perfect, plain back with no ink on it was now not so perfect. Because I was on it.
"What is it of?" I asked again, just to be clear.
"It's your name. It's says Ariana, and under it, it says forever and always." He said, and that's when I didn't even try to hold back the tears anymore.
"He said even if you guys never get back together," Niall went on, "he'll never get rid of it, because he'll love you forever and always, no matter what." Please stop talking Niall, you're ruining me.
"I'm still not coming, but thanks for telling me." I cried, and wiped my nose before hanging up. I cried for a long time after that, and eventually it was 3:30pm. Where were they?
I'm not even sure why I fell in love with Harry in the first place. He was so mean to me, and so confusing. One minute he was telling me how he hates me, and the next he was laughing at my jokes, or kissing me in his car when it was raining.
But he had eyes you could get lost in, and I guess I did.
"I can't believe she never came." Alyssa's voice echoed through the empty apartment.
"I really though she was going to show." Alli sighed.
"I'm right here, and I can hear you." I carried myself into the room they were in, and finished wiping the last few tears off my cheeks.
"Sorry." Alli sighed.
"You ready to go?" Hailey tried to smile.
"Ready as I'll ever be." I nodded, and we left the apartment, locking it behind us.
We took the elevator down to the lobby, and Lucy handed the guy behind the counter three keys. He smiled and waved to us, and we all said goodbye to the doorman as he opened the door for us.
We got in a car, and the driver took us straight to the airport. I looked out the window, and watched the lights and building flash and pass by before my eyes.
I'm really going to New York again, and I'm really leaving everyone behind. I'm going to miss Paul, and everyone else, and Perrie, who I started seeing less and less, but I was in her wedding. I'll even miss Eleanor whom I haven't seen in forever because of Louis. I'll also miss Gemma and Anne, and they didn't even know that I was carrying a baby that was related to them. Make that two babies.
We got to the airport, and we went inside. We checked in, and got the things we needed to board the plane. We all made our way over to our gate, and I looked around. I really was going to miss England. I loved it here, and this was definitely not the last time I would be here.
As people were boarding the plane, we got in the back of the line. Everyone was getting on, and I was the last on, since they had to help me because I was considered, "handicap", even though I wasn't. I was in a wheelchair, yes, but I only broke a few bones. That's all.
"Ariana!" Harry's voice carried through my head, and I thought I was only hearing things. That's what I figured, until Alli, Lucy, Hailey and Alyssa turned their heads in the direction of the voice, and their faces turned up into a small smile as they looked at me. I turned to see what they were looking at, and sure enough, the father of my children was standing there, his eyes pleading for forgiveness.
"Go, Ariana." Hailey pushed me a little.
"No. We're going to New York." I said, and started to push myself towards the plane.
"Ariana!" Harry called again. "Please don't leave me." I heard him say.
"Ariana, c'mon." Alyssa lightly smiled.
"He's just drunk." I shook my head, and got on the plane without another word. The other girls joined me five minutes later, and the plane took off shortly after that.
I looked out the window and watched us leave the ground, and I watched as I left behind everything and everyone I cared about.
"Off to New York." Alyssa elbowed me, and smiled.
"Off to New York." I repeated, and closed my eyes.
(thank you so much for reading closer! it's been a lot of fun writing it, and please stay tuned for closer 2! it's coming soon, so please vote and continue to read. i love you guys so much and I'll see you when I get home from camp in four weeks :* xx)