I didn't know what I was expecting when I texted James to meet me at my condo unit. I made a huge mess, and James was greatly affected by it. After that article linking him to Diana, I heard from Teo and Axel that James got into trouble with his strict Chinese family.
Then, it seems that he was forced into an engagement with the daughter of one of their business partners. I made things very terrible for him, and I feel guilty about it.
If only I paid more attention to Diana and didn't leave her with him, things wouldn't turn out that way. And if only I controlled myself, I wouldn't end up waking up the next day not knowing whether I really slept with him or not.
Things weren't sunny for me as well, after the news about Ethan's engagement, Mr. Hernandez made a deal with me. He won't use the rumors about Diana and Ethan for publicity if I behave well and accept more gigs.
For the past days, I worked non-stop. After shooting the series, I would go for some photoshoot; either for a magazine cover or endorsements. He was milking the fact that I am an international model signed by Z.L. Modelling.
Basically, I had to forget about rest or vacation. Even after we end shooting and airing the series, I'll have to fly straight back to New York to continue my modelling.
Sure, I finally have a career in the Philippines, but I am not crazy enough to leave my career as an international model.
I couldn't compare my suffering to James' trouble, though. I mean, I'm still gaining something at the end of the day, but I'm pretty sure there's nothing good about being forced to marry someone you don't even like.
Inviting him over to my condo, again, after what happened the week before might not be the brightest idea, but it's the only place I know where we could truly talk in private.
No ears listening to us.
No eyes watching us.
No cameras, no paparazzi.
I got no reply from James, so I had no idea if he was coming or not. I prepared a lot of food too, because I don't know exactly what he likes, and I was hoping that if he eats his favorite food, he would be in a better mood and our talk would go smoother.
Then again, James always seemed to be in a great mood. He never seems to get into a bad mood.
The doorbell finally rang, and James stood outside my door wearing a white shirt printed with "Thomasian Food Enthusiast". His biceps were displayed permanently and I could see the outline of his abs behind the shirt.
"Come in." I told him.
James walked inside. "What exactly do you want to talk about?" I didn't tell him what I wanted to talk about over text.
I was wrong, James can get in a bad mood. Well, he wasn't exactly mad or anything, it's just that he wasn't smiling as usual.
"Have you eaten lunch? I ordered some food..." I told him as we walked towards the dining area
"What's this? Is there a party here?" He asked. I can't quite figure out his mood.
"I don't know what you like eating, so I ended up ordering that much." I told him honestly.
All of a sudden, James chuckled. That usual smile of his came back. "You have a weird way of apologizing, weird, but I like it." He told me as we took a seat.
I sighed. "I don't know where exactly to start... I heard from Teo what happened, sorry, I didn't know things would end that way for you."
"That's something you have no control of." He replied. "My family can try to marry me off with someone of their choosing as much as they want, in the end, I'll still make the decision for myself." James started eating a little.
"About the other thing... I'm sorry that it took this long for us to talk again... My schedule was full, and I was not sure if I really wanted to talk about it..." I told him carefully.
"It's alright. I understand you're busy. Besides, it's not an easy thing to talk about." He told me with a modest smile.
I can't do this. I really can't stand how nice he is. If I was in his shoes, I would be very angry. Doesn't he feel angry for being left alone in a strangers place after they might've slept the night before? I mean, it was practically a one night stand, where his partner just took off after waking up.
"Are you not mad? Not even the slightest?" I questioned him.
"What's the use of getting angry, it won't solve anything. Besides, it's not like I'm not at fault. I knew you're drunk, but I still I went on with it." James said.
"Wait, does that mean...?" I was holding my breath, I was deeply hoping that nothing happened. That we just plainly slept. That his shirt was torn off when he was helping get on my bed and that I took all my clothes off while asleep and he just fell asleep in my room because he was tired that night.
"We had sex." James said in a plain manner. "What's so hard in saying that?"
I left out a sigh. It was not like I wasn't expecting that. Hearing it out loud though was something else. My first experience with a man, and it's with someone who's in love with my friend.
"I'm never drinking again..." I muttered
"So, it's my turn to ask. Are you not angry?" James asked.
"Why would I be mad? We're both drunk, it's not like we're fully aware of what we're doing..."
"You're wrong. I was not drunk." James admitted. "I knew exactly what we were doing." He dropped the bomb with a smile and I was left in my seat deeply shock.
I was wrong about this guy. He's not that all nice. He's weird. He's crazy.
"Wha-what?!" I protested.
"You're drunk and you came onto me, so it took the chance. You look good and all, and it was too good of an opportunity to pass. I wanted to do it slowly because you were drunk and all, but you were just too wild."
"Hey, stop it. What is wrong with you? You practically took advantage of me!"
"And yet I'm the one whose shirt was torn apart. How do you think that happened? You were too excited and pushed down on the bed and ripped my shirt, well, it was exciting for me too, so I really can't complain."
"Ahhhh! Ahhh!" I covered my ears. "Don't say anything anymore. You're weird. Do your friends know how strange you are? Does Teo know you're a psycho?"
Suddenly, James burst out laughing. "Your expression is too funny." He said.
"What?!"
"I'm joking." He finally admitted. "I didn't take advantage of you. I can't remember everything either."
"Hey! What's wrong with you?! Why would you joke about something like that?!" I complained.
"I was confused as you were, but you left me in your room. It even took you a week to contact me. I felt like I was abandoned after an unwanted hookup. It was like I had a one night stand with someone who ran away the morning after. How do you think I felt, as a man? I was annoyed." He said with a smile as he leaned closer on the table.
He should be thankful that he's on the other side of the table, or I would've punched him. That was not a funny joke. Not at all.
"Fine. I deserve that." I sighed. I still think he's weird. "So, you don't remember anything at all?"
"I'm not sure what happened that night either. After I drove you back here, you practically forced me to have another round of drinks with you. I had no choice; you won't let me go until I take a shot. We took a few shots and the next thing I know we're on your bed naked."
A ray of hope came to me. Maybe nothing did happen to us. Maybe I'm a still a virgin in gay sex. "So there's a chance that nothing..."
"No, something did happen." James said. "My ba-back hurt the morning after... and..." His cheeks flushed red as he hesitated to talk. "I had to clean myself... you know... there..." He said quickly, almost in a whisper.
Once again, my world came crashing down. Not only did I slept with him, we did it without protection, too. If there's any consolation, at least I know I was the top.
"Oh god... oh no..." I massaged my temple.
James stopped eating. He must have felt awkward as well.
Should I ask him if he's alright? Would that be inappropriate?
The list of things I should apologize to him about was just getting longer and longer.
"If you need my help to get out of your arranged engagement, just tell me, it's the least I can do, after all that happened." I told him. Well, I said that expecting that he would just refuse my offer and say that he could handle things himself, but I was wrong.
"The moment I back out of that engagement, I'll be disowned by my grandfather." James said. "There's no way out of it, right now."
"That's it, you're just giving in?"
"When my family is involved, you should know when to fight them and when to fall back." James said. "Now is not the right time to rebel. If I try to break the engagement, it would only end up being a fatal blow to my planned freedom."
"But... if you're not the one to break the engagement, you won't get into more trouble, would you?" I asked him.
"I don't think so..." James said hesitantly.
"I see..." I said as I nod, an idea was forming in my head. "Have you met this girl, anyway?"
"Not yet." James replied. What the hell? How can he get engaged with someone he had never met before? I've always dreamed about being part of a wealthy family, but I never thought how difficult it was. James had it tough.
James was not as bad as I thought he was. Well, aside from the fact that I still do not like how nice he is, he's an okay guy overall.
I thought that his niceness was just a front for something grimmer, I mean, even supervillains act nice once in a while. Not James though. I think he acts nice so that he could accumulate good karma and be rewarded with his dreamed freedom in the end.
After James left, I tried hard to remember why I forced him to drink with me. What was I trying to achieve in getting him drunk?
Hell, it wasn't to have sex with him. So what is it?
I still had James torn shirt from that night. He threw it on the bin in my room. I was feeling guilty about the whole thing, so I picked it up. I tried finding someone to fix it, but the shirt was ruin.
I also tried finding the exact same shirt, but there were no labels, so I figured that it was tailor-made.
"Let's see..." I opened my computer and found a forum for fashion enthusiasts. I posted James torn shirt and asked for help to find the original tailor.
I guess I was feeling sorry for him. He likes Teo, but he can't do anything about it, because Teo is in love with his cousin, and Damien feels the same way too.
"Ahhh... That's right... That's why I tried to get him drunk..." I muttered.
I was so hell-bent on finding out what he really feels about Teo and Damien that I got him drunk. I was suspicious that he was up to something no good and I wanted to protect Teo's happiness, but I ended up opening Pandora's Box instead.
"What is it...? What did he say...? Ahhh!" I jumped on my bed as I struggled with remembering it.
I was tired after a whole week of work, so my eyes started feeling heavy.
I shouldn't have let myself fall asleep at that time.
After hearing James's cruel practical joke about what happened that night, and after learning that something did really happen between us; I couldn't quite get rid of the thought.
James rang the doorbell. I opened the door.
There was no exchange of words, he just suddenly held me by the cheeks and pulled me closer. We kissed passionately as we took each other's clothes, all the way to the bedroom.
I pushed him down on the bed and smiled at him. "I knew you'll come back for more." I told him. "You want more of me?" I asked him.
Suddenly, James pulled me down and our positions changed. "Let's shake things up a bit." He said with a smile as he leaned closer. "This time, I'll be the husband, and you'll be my wife."
I woke up in utter shock. "What the hell?! What did I just dream about?! Why would I dream that?!"
If that was not shocking enough, I was completely aroused when I woke up.