"Don't mistake salt for sugar. If he wants to be with you; he will. That simple."
☆☆☆
It was the most restless night I had in my entire life besides... that day.
I could only wish to fall asleep before I would fall apart, but it was the completer opposite.
I lay here on the bed, staring at the wall after my endless sobs. Thoughts were razing through my mind like a plague sticking to me. I couldn't really tell what I felt perhaps I didn't feel anything at all; I was numb.
Have you ever been so sad that it physically hurts inside? You know you aren't going to die, but it feels like a part of you just died that night; a part you'll never find again.
If I could be honest I also couldn't fall asleep, because I missed the warmth of his arms engulfing me, protecting me from the world.
I think I've lost my mind.
I was thinking about what will happen now. Will he leave me to go back to his fiancée? But the mission? How is the mission going to end? I didn't come here to get my heart broken.
My head snaps to door, although I didn't hear anything, but I still could feel it... his presence.
It was hilarious how I could feel his warm presence miles away from me. It was as if his warmth sent an aura through the whole room, reminding me of his presence.
I could feel him leaning against my door. I could hear his soft breathing and the guilt... the guilt was suffocating me. It came off so strongly it was almost unbearable.
"Princess, are you sleeping? Please give me a sign that you're listening", he breathes out, knocking softly at my door. His velvet voice made me tear up again. I was fighting back my tears.
Silence.
Should I respond? Would he tell me that I have to leave? I'm not prepared yet. I have to calm my heart first.
"I can feel that you are awake", he whispers against my door.
I somehow could picture me his lost eyes, leaning his head against my door.
"Please listen to me. I know what you saw is unexplainable. I'm sorry", he begins, his velvety voice laced with hurt.
"But I will still try my best to explain it. I swear I was just showing her the restroom until she begged me to wait for her, because she won't find the way back", his voice was cracking in pain, making my eyes tear up again.
Oh no, I don't want to cry anymore.
I want this pain to be done.
"Stop!", I whisper out between sobs. I knew he had heard me by the wave of guilt I felt.
"Princess."
"I don't want to hear it. It's okay if you want to go back to her. It's okay. It's okay. It's o...kay", I try to convince him, but perhaps the person I tried to convince the most was myself.
It's okay,
I can let go.
"No, love. Please listen to me. I beg you, please", Mason exclaims I could hear the sorrow in his voice.
"She kissed me! I didn't want to kiss her, she kissed me. I wanted to push her away, but by the time I did it you already saw me. Believe me if I say I'm completely mesmerized by you. That I don't want to taste or savor anyone else, but you. Even if a million women try to bewitch me, I will still choose you. Only you. You have tainted me, leaving traces of rapture on my soul. I'm only yours", I could feel him smiling, dreaming away by the end of his endless rant.
I was left in shock.
My heart was beating all over again, making skips in my chest. I didn't know what to think, but by the tone of voice and sincerity... it all made sense.
He never showed any affection for anyone else but me. I kind of could see it coming. Reigna... Regina George, trying to steal my Mason.
She's even faker than in mean girls.
It reminded me of that scene were Regina George kissed Aaron Samuels.
What a little wanker.
People might call me naive for believing him, but who am I going to believe?
Regina George
Or
Mason, the one who has always been sincere and cared for me from the beginning.
I'm not going to be one of those girls in stories where she's not going to listen to the guy what he has to say, but she rather believes the villain.
I might be naive and innocent, but not that level.
I hop out of bed, sneaking to the door. I open the door, meeting with a hurt Mason.
He looked bad, maybe worse than me. There were big bags under his eyes and his skin was pale white. It looked as if he hasn't catch a sleep for about a decennia. His eyes were dark. Hurt was clearly displayed on his features. He looked lost.
"Am I the only one?, I ask shyly, looking at the ground. My cheeks were burning with color.
I hear a loud gasp coming from him before getting engulfed in a bone crushing hug.
His muscular arms were holding me tight as if he was afraid that I'll disappear any second now.
His head was buried in my neck, making me shiver from his warm breath fanning over my throat.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, love. I swear I'll never hurt you again. I don't want to see any tears on you anymore. Seeing you hurt like this really breaks me", he whispers against my skin, rubbing his nose on my throat.
For once I felt all my worries wash away. All those painful emotions were replaced by fervor. A rushing flame in me awoke suffocating me.
I broke down once again. Big elephant tears escaping my eyes. I don't know why I was crying so hard, but it somehow felt better than holding it all in.
Holding it was as grasping a heated coal; I could only burn myself.
I felt all my broken pieces come back together. I knew I was broken, but I didn't want to face it.
But with him I somehow felt safe. I wanted to face all me fears if it would mean being with him. It was the first time I had cried my heart out and it somehow felt so satisfying.
My fist were clenching tightly onto his shirt. His shirt wet from all my tears, but it seems like he didn't care.
In contrary he only held me tighter, swinging me back and forth in a comforting manner while softly whispering sweet nothings in my ear.
"Please don't cry, my love. It breaks my heart seeing you like this. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry", he whispers, agony tainted between his words.
His warms hand goes out, wiping my tears away, but it only results in more coming out. He bows down kissing the new fresh tears away.
"Let's go to bed, my queen. It's been a very long, tiring day. I know you haven't had any sleep yet. Me too, I can't sleep without you in my arms", he states before picking me up bridal style while walking up to the bed, laying us both on it.
We both were tired from the lack of sleep and my breakdown just a moment ago somehow made me even tired.
I was laying partly on him, my arms were tightly wrapped around his neck. My head lay on his chest, listening to his heavy heart beat. It sounded like music in my ears. Making my heart skips a beat of two.
"Mason", I whisper softly.
"Yes, baby", he responds, kissing the top of my head.
"How long have you and Reigna been engaged?", I ask softly almost mumbling over my words.
"For about 10 years", Mason states dryly as if it didn't mean anything.
"Oh", was the only thing I could utter. I felt my heart drop back to my stomach.
"It was a planned engagement", he begins to explain in panic after seeing my disappointed face. "We were engaged as children, forced by our parents. I never was fond of the idea, but it seemed like Reigna had developed some sort of obsession with me or better said my money. By the age of 18 I called our engagement off because I never liked her. I didn't feel a grunt for her perhaps maybe annoyance and irritation from time to time. I never wanted to marry someone until..."
He wraps his fingers around my wrist as handcuffs, caging me.
"Until you", he whispers lovely, bringing my wrists to his lips, softly placing butterfly kisses on them.
Blood creeped up my face, making me blush madly. I was silenced by his enthralling words. They left his mouth, ringing in my ear as soft bells, louding all over again.
"By the way what happened to Regina... I mean Reigna?", I ask now remembering her Botox face.
A sly smirk appeared on Mason lips, making him look like a naughty boy.
"Well, I might or might not have punched her", he states cheekily.
My mouth gapes open in shock.
"No, you didn't."
"Okay, I didn't but Sierra did", he respond a wolfish smile breaking across his face.
"Ohw."
I was too tired to say anything more. My eyes felt heavy, shutting down in the dark.
"Goodnight, my only love", Mason whispers in my ear, grazing his teeth over my ear lob.
The warmth embraced me tightly, engulfing me in a deep somber sleep.
"There's only you. I promise..."
☆☆☆
"Fayeeeee", I hear the door getting loudly pulled open, making me stir in the heat.
I open my eyes, perceiving a jumpy Sierra standing next to the door with a shadow next to her.
"You can't forgive him yet. We... well I mean you need to take revenge so I brought Andrew, my friend. You need to kiss him in front of Mason!", she stops when she finally meets my confused sleepy face.
"Wait! Who is in your bed? Are you cheating on Mason??? I mean like yeah I wanted you to take revenge, BUT NOT THAT LEVEL", she exclaims, banging her head several times to the door as if she couldn't believe what she saw.
Should I stop her?
It was a one way ticket to death....
Nah, let her do.
"Sierra!", Mason growls in his hoarse morning voice, bringing me closer to his warmth.
"Oh, Mason. It was luckily you. I'm relieved", she states her blue eyes wide open, but stops in tract her eyes filling with confusion.
"WAIT. WHAT? I'M CONFUSED. EXPLAIN! NO, DON'T EXPLAI-"
"Sierra, it's early in the morning. Go back to sleep or do whatever you want", Mason interrupts her abruptly.
"Ohw, I'm sorry. So Faye, you really don't want to kiss Andrew?", she asks sincerely, pointing to that guy, Andrew.
"Sierra!", Mason seethes furiously.
"If no one wants him then I'm taking him. Come Andrew let's have some fun", Sierra skips in his arms and like that the door gets closed again.
I hear Mason loudly let a frustrating sigh out beside me.
"I'm sorry for Sierra", he shakes his head, making me giggle.
"What?", he asks in confusion, narrowing his eyes amused.
"Your face", I answer still giggling.
"What's with my face?"
"I love your frustrated morning scowl... it's so sexy", I blurt out.
When my own words finally ring my ears I gasp in shock.
WHAT HAVE I SAID?!
My face heats up in shame. I don't dare to look up, but I could feel his burning gaze on me.
His fingers take a hold of my chin, raising it up to meet his lovely eyes.
"I love your sweet voice", he whispers , coming closer almost against my lips.
"..."
"I love your blush."
"..."
"I love your laugh."
"..."
"I love your beautiful green eyes."
"..."
"I love your flawless body."
"..."
"And lastly I love you."
And like that his lips lovingly claims mine, leaving me with endless thoughts.
What. The actual mushroom.
☆☆☆
HI LOVELIES!
I'm sorry for not updating as much as before.
I really try to write, but a chapter takes me at least 4 hours and I don't know how to find the right time for it.
By the way listen to the song above. It's perfect. I love The Neighbourhood <3.
Hopefully see you soon.
I also try to reply on all your comments, but for some unknown reason I can't see all the comments so yeah.
But still comment if you want it makes me happy and I might update faster :)
XOXO
LOVE YOU