A/n:
***If you don't care what I have to say skip the bold part***
I'm starting this chapter with an author's note because it might be the last chapter I don't know how will it go. A small reminder that I never, ever, wrote to please. Yes, votes are nice, and comments are very well appreciated and I reply to almost all of them, but I never do anything to please anyone. I do it to get stuff off my mind.
On this Journey, I would like to thank a few people who made the journey less of a task and more of a ride.
First and foremost I'd like to thank KVIII for being a permanent support since the beginning. And also for her constant contribution of ideas and original content.
I'd like to thank Widerange, Pumpkin, and Australia, for also pitching in on ideas every now and then, and bringing the whole story and characters to life when they speak about them. You guys have been a great support and I'm forever thankful.
Last but not least, I'd like to thank my girlfriend, whose kind words like "Ryder and Spencer end together or we end forever" have been of support and encouragement.
Thanks for sticking with my gayness ♡
Without further ado, read on.
*Spencer's P.O.V*
The butterfly effect. A concept that had always fascinanted me, and I only stopped to think about it now.
No, this isn't my depression speaking, nor I'm on some drugs, and I'm not drunk. Completely sober and my mind running like a clock.
They didn't know that a restaurant date, a ring, and a dress, will cause something so bad. Almost catastrophic.
They didn't know that such a happy moment was going to be such a sad moment more than twenty years later.
Maybe it's true. Whatever goes around comes around. A boomerang. A scale. Whatever good will generate bad and whatever bad will generate good. We may not see it or realize it. I didn't realise it myself until now.
They were in their late teenage years. He asked her out, she said yes.
He asked her to prom, she said yes.
He asked her parents for a blessing, they said yes.
They were in their early twenties.
He asked her on a date, she said yes.
She asked him if he's okay, he said yes.
He got on his knee and gave her a ring.
She said yes.
And life goes on. You'd think it's lovely, adorable. You'd think it's beautiful and romantic and happy. They thought so too.
They got their firstborn and they were happy. Overwhelmed with joy and hopes and dreams.
They got another one and they were happy too.
But. There's always a but. Because like I said, it all spins around eventually.
Little did they know, that they were on the way to messing up someone else's life.
The second born grew up. He went to kindergarten then middle school then high-school.
He went to college and met people. He almost killed himself a couple of times but he doesn't talk about it. He never did and no one ever found out. He was good at hiding those things.
And as life goes on, paths change. His father went through a path. His mother did too. His brother did too. But the paths were not in one direction.
He went in a path too.
He always had a small drop of hope lingering around in him. He met the bad, then he met the worst. Then he met the good, then he met the best.
Good and bad right? The universe.
He had friends and he lost friends.
He had lovers and he lost lovers.
He thought that he didn't want to go along a path drawn for him by someone else. He wanted to carve his own way and make his own path.
They tell you it works. You'll be happy you'll be free. You make your own decisions and feel good about them. It happens.
But not to him.
As he carved his path, a stray rock landed on someone else's path.
That person was walking his path with his eyes closed. He was content going through whatever destiny had planned for him, long as it's a paved way.
The rock was not supposed to be there.
He slipped.
The butterfly effect. If Victor hadn't asked Kathy out, I wouldn't have carved my own path, and got a rock in Ryder's, and made him slip.
"WHERE IS HE?" I ran like a lunatic through the hospital hallway. I saw the shocked faces of everyone. They were all staring at me.
Jack, Jessy, Livi, Linda.
Did they know about the butterfly effect too?
Were they blaming like I was blaming myself?
I was held back, but I didn't know who held me back. Security, maybe.
I was told that I can't go past those doors. I was told I need to stay calm. I was told that this was going to do more harm than good.
I did not stop.
"I wanna see him" I roared through panic and misery. "I just wanna see him"
I ignored all the pleas that begged me to calm down. How was I to calm down when I was the one who caused this?
A sharp jab to my neck lead my legs to bail out on me. My arms were next, and the worst of all, my voice too.
When I woke up, it was in a hospital bed. The irony.
I was disoriented and tired. I felt like my body was heavy and my head was heavier. I didn't notice professor Linda in my room until she cleared her throat.
"We gave you an injection, to calm you down"
"I feel like shit" I said bluntly.
"I didn't say it feels nice, but you're calm so it serves the purpose" she adjusted her hair and turned off the TV.
"I'm trying to be mad but it feels like I'm physically incapable of being angry"
"It'll go away soon"
I was able to cry though. "It's my fault" I blamed myself because I was right. If I wasn't so selfish and tried to start fresh and new that wouldn't have happened.
"It's no one's fault" She looked at her watch then at me. "Except for the driver. He was way past the speed limit when he hit Ryder."
"Mark my words, the moment I'm able to get out of here I'm going to kill that driver."
Linda sort of smiled, then frowned. "it's tragic, really. The guy was pronounced dead on the scene. Karma took care of that for you" she sighed.
I told her about every detail she was missing. The whole ordeal from A to Z, even though she knew a lot of the story, minus the names. I was very vague about who the people was in our recent sessions. But now she knew.
I was out in the hallway, dragging a bag of IV fluid because I was also diagnosed as malnourished. It's probably because I haven't eaten for a handful of days.
Linda was leading the way to the Intensive Care Unit where we met with her husband. He lead us through a couple hallways until the same scene from the ER was in front of me. One difference though.
Jack wasn't crying alone, he was in Hunter's arms.
It was bittersweet. Livi with Jessy and Hunter with Jack.
Hunter gave me a tight hug and checked up on me. After all he was a doctor in training.
Good news is that they said I get to see Ryder after two to three hours.
Bad news, he was in a coma.
So I was there, sitting on a visitors' chair, with my friends and brother around me. Despite the fact that I was the cause of all this, they were supportive. They didn't give me dirty looks or death glares which I was glad for.
The clicking of heels from the hallway a while later made our heads shoot up and towards the source of the sound.
I felt my blood heat up with anger and fury again.
Jane was holding a flower bouquet like an idiot.
"I'm sorry miss but you can't go in there, only family and friends" a nurse halted Jane's approach towards us.
"Silly Doctress, I'm the patient's girlfriend" Jane said, perky as ever.
Before I could shove the IV metal hanger down her throat and through her rectum, Pr. Linda was in the way.
"So you're Jane huh?" Linda questioned, looking her up and down.
"Yes, now please mov-" before Jane was able to finish her words, Linda's fingers were splattered on Jane's face. The slap echoed in the silent waiting room.
Jane's eyes were flaring harder than her nostrils.
"Security" Linda boomed across the hallway. Her voice was louder than a lion's roar.
Within seconds, security were dragging Jane out of the hospital. The flower bouquet remained on the floor until the janitor cleaned them up.
They were jasmine, which Ryder was allergic to.
<><><>
Two months pass faster than you might think.
A lot changes in two months.
Flowers bloom and flowers die.
One thing was the same, however.
Ryder was still in a coma until that day.
It was the day they were going to disconnect him from the machinery that kept him alive.
We were all there.
I wasn't crying. My eyes were too dark and no tears would fall out.
The doctors had all the paperwork done, and his parents were actually there for a change.
It was a very dark day, as if the grim reaper was hovering over the sky.
But then he woke.
And everyone cheered. He looked fazed. As if he didn't know where he was or who we were. The doctors ushered us out of the room while they did check ups and other medical shit.
That day I was sad.
Then I was happy.
Then I was sad again.
The doctor's report was loud and clear.
I didn't want to believe it. I shrugged it off. I was sure he will know me. I was positive about it. He was going to know me.
He opened his eyes, his eyelashes fluttering and adjusting to the bright lights of the sterile smelling room.
"Hey" I said.
"Hey" he said back. His face was so much better than it was at first. Everything looked fine. He looked fine.
I reached out to hug him.
But he pushed me away.
"I'm sorry but who are you?"
One last chapter to go x