"You don't have to say goodbye today, you know?"
My eyes stare up at the bland building. Silent. Numb.
I ignore Jaces reasonings, walking into the doors of studio eleven, where everything began.
It was the day. That dreaded, awful day that I moved stuff out of the once cozy dressing room, and into my car. The car that Jace hadn't seen yet. The car that was already stuffed with boxes of my things from home. I slept in my car for the past two days. But none of what I had encountered the last few days would be as bad as this moment.
"Emily? Hi how are you!" Veronica smiles, hugging me tightly. Within the past month of me quitting, she had gotten a permanent spot of clothing manager. Jace stands behind me silently. Uncomfortable at the way things ended between them, bringing up memories now that I was here.
I make small talk with her for a bit, scurrying off only to mope slowly down the hallway to the wooden door, a chalkboard sign hangs with my name on it.
Jace helps me put my things in some boxes, understanding that this would be him within months of the show ending. It was equally as hard for him at that moment.
A knock at the door directs my attention, a family cast stands in the doorway, smiles on their faces. Smiles of sympathy.
Some of them had only found out over phone that I had left due to the pregnancy. Some were only now just figuring it out.
"Emily" Riele gives me a squeeze, gasping as she pulls away to look at me.
"Pregnancy glow is a thing?"
"Glad you think so, I feel like a mess" I sniffle, feeling my eyes water for seconds before evaporating with the words repeating in my head. Stop.
Stop.
She moves out of the way, Cooper taking her spot with a hug.
"Can't believe Jace is going to be a dad before me" he huffs, earning a needed laugh from my lips.
The conversation directs to Jace. I zone out, my eyes finding Seans. My first true encounter in California. The one that I owed most to.
My arms hold out, waiting for him to accept my invite. His arms wrap around me tightly, sensing my sadness through my clothes.
"This doesn't have to be goodbye" He speaks.
"It won't be, you know that."
"I hope more than anything that you're right on that one."
"Once you're a part of our family. There isn't any turning back."
xxx
I rub my irritated eyes, puffy at the feeling of detachment of what I owed my entire life to.
Jace sits in the drivers side of his car, my boxes stacked in his back seats. His stare holds to the ground, sitting there letting me cry for minutes. Selflessly.
He doesn't speak a word, not fully understanding what he'd say in order to keep me from breaking.
I was an emotional mess and as much as I didn't want to admit,
It had nothing to do with being pregnant.
"Sean's right, you know? This isn't the end, of anything"
"I'm just going through some things" I admit,
"I'm only tired"
"I can drop you off at home? So you can get some rest?"
My head shakes at him vigorously, restraining my waterworks to come around once more.
"It's not healthy for you to be tired anymore. You're sleeping for two now."
"I have to tell you something" my breath comes out staggered.
His expression melts, already concerned at my tone.
"What is it?"
"My parents kicked me out- well I, walked out"
"What?""
"I just couldn't take it anymore. My dad, hes gotten to be too much to put up with since our trip."
"This all happened today? I can't imagine the toll you've gone through in one day-"
"Three days ago" I speak.
"Three days? Where have you been staying?"
"My car"
"Emily" He softens with pity, his hand resting to my leg.
"Have you slept at all since?"
My head shakes truthfully.
"That's not good, baby. Why didn't you call me. I would have picked you up, brought you to my house."
"I didn't want to burden your parents. You all have enough stress as it is."
He sighs, feeling the unneeded guilt radiating off of him.
"Let's get you back to my house to get some rest. I'll pick up your car while you're settling in."
"I can't move in with you, Jace. You know I can't do that to your parents."
"It's temporary, until we figure something out, okay? But you're insane if you think I'm going to let my pregnant girlfriend sleep in her car. Especially with it being so cold lately."
I agree, not having much else of a choice. When we get to his house, he makes sure I have everything to get some sleep, taking my keys from me, and refusing to leave until I had fallen peacefully asleep.
He lays next to me, his arms round me for a long while. Long enough that I give up staying awake, and soak up the sleep that I had desperately craved for days. Feeling calm.
Safe.
I wake up hours later to him still there, almost like he never had left. Only now, he sits up on the bed, the laptop opened on his lap.
"Good, you're up" he runs his fingers through my hair.
"How'd you sleep?"
"What time is it?" I groan, burying my face into the side of him.
"Two AM." He speaks.
"Come sleep with me" I mumble.
"Move in with me" he blurts.
I raise my head, my eyebrows frown with confusion.
"What?"
"I've been looking at apartments. We can afford this, Em."
"Our own apartment?"
"You need a place to stay. And I want to stay with you. And since you won't move in here, let's move out. Together"
"You're sure?"
"Not a doubt." He shuts his laptop, setting to the ground.
"We'll figure some stuff out tomorrow. But in the meantime, I moved your boxes from your car to my closet. I'm always going to give you a place to stay, whether you like it or not."
"Thank you, for everything that you do. I'm so lucky to have you"
"Don't turn all gross and cheesy on me now" he chuckles, switching off the light and getting comfortable back besides me.
"But I will say that I wasn't ever happy until I met you. You are easily the best thing that's happened to me, Emily."
I smile, despite the darkness. He was it. It was him. Friday was the day that I had booked an appointment, the gender of our baby would come about and somehow, everything would piece together. And our life would be easy, and put together nicely.
its the biggest lie i've told.