"What if someone see's me?" I ask Harry as we sit backstage at the concert that One Direction was about to have. Harry wants me to go out and stand in the crowd since I've never done that before, most of the times I don't even show up to the venue and when I do I just stay backstage with Lou. I don't know why, I guess I don't want his fans seeing me and getting annoyed or something, this is their moment with the band, I don't want to ruin it. Although, I would really love to see Harry preform and I'm not gonna try and draw attention to myself and make it all about me in anyway.
"Then you'll get arrested" Harry says sarcastically which causes me to giggle. "Come on, it'll be fine! Who cares if someone see's you! I'm sure people already assume you'll be here" he says and I nod my head. He's got a point, people know I'm in Singapore and they know its to visit Harry so they can kinda assume I'll be wherever he is.
"Fine" I say as I roll my eyes playfully to pretend as though I'm doing him a favour. We chat for a little bit before Harry is called to the stage. He gives me a quick kiss before he begins to follow the stage director and I make my way over to Gemma and Sophia who are chatting near by. We begin to talk for a bit before deciding to head over to our spots by the stage to watch the show. I haven't been to very many concerts in my life so it's always exciting to watch. One Direction are amazing live and Harry looks so hot on stage. He looks over at me sometimes while he's singing other times when he's not but just wants to check up on me and give me a cheeky smile. I love him so much and I am so happy to have him in my live.
...
"Look I told you! 'He identifies as Muslim' and I mean his name is Mehmet, what do you expect?" I tease Zayn as we look up Dr. Oz's Wikipedia page. The concert had just ended and Zayn and I were the first ones in the tour bus waiting to get back to the hotel. Zayn is Muslim and we're trying to think of other celebrities who are as well. I remembered reading once that Dr. Oz was and he didn't believe me so we decided to look it up. I was going to walk to the tour bus with Harry but he was stopped by some of his management and he told me to just wait in the tour bus for him.
"What the hell! That's sick!" Zayn says "I just fell in love with Dr.Oz like 1000% more" he says.
"You're in love with Dr Oz?!" I ask as I burst into laughter.
"Yea, don't judge me alright, he keeps me healthy" Zayn jokes as we both laugh even harder. More and more people begin to board the bus but Harry still isn't here. Liam and Sophia sit beside Zayn at the table we were sitting at and we all begin to talk. I look out the window to see Harry still talking to the man from his management as they walk towards the bus. Harry looks so visibly angry, I even see him stop and face the man while seemingly yelling at him at one point. Harry finally makes his way onto the bus and I'm worried about what kind of mood he will be in, 'why is he always so angry after talking to those people?' I ask myself. Harry hops on board and immediately plants himself beside me before giving me a kiss on the cheek and greeting Liam, Sophia and Zayn. 'How is he in such a good mood? Is he faking it? Will he talk to me about it later?' are just some of the few questions that rush through my head as we all sit and talk. I don't get much time to assess the situation though since Liam starts directing some questions at me like how I liked the show and whatnot. We finally reach the hotel and I remain silent walking beside Harry waiting until we're alone.
"Why are you so quiet?" he asks me before I have a chance to ask him any of my questions.
"I was just thinking of some stuff I've been wanting to ask you, I just wanted to wait till we were alone" I admit as we walk into our hotel room. Harry gives me a confused look as I casually take my jacket off and sit on the floor as Harry does the same.
"Like what? And why are we sitting on the ground" he asks as we sit cross-legged on the floor facing each other I put my arms in between the hole produced by my legs and Harry has his arms facing behind him as he leans against them seeming very casual.
"I don't know, I just thought it was comfortable but that's not what we're talking about" I snap playfully, "you never tell me what's going on" I announce and I see Harry's eyes widen a bit.
"What do you mean?" He asks as if he doesn't know what I'm talking about, and maybe he doesn't.
"I always tell you when something's bothering me when you ask but you never tell me when you're mad. Every time you talk to those guys from you're management you always look so upset and don't try to deny it because I literally saw you yell at that guy today Harry, what's going on?" I ask again.
"I thought I've told you, it's just work stuff, there's no reason for me to bore you with it" he responds.
"You won't be boring me though! I want to know what's wrong because I care about you" I say raising my voice as if to make Harry hear me better.
"I get that but it's just not worth it, trust me, I'm fine, that's just how I always talk to them" he says and I can tell he's lying. I don't know how, I just do. But since I can't really say that as a reasonable argument and have him open up to me I decide to dismiss the idea. Besides, it's not the only thing I wanted to talk to Harry about.
"Fine but what about everything else. I mean I've told you my feelings about everything from meeting your friends and family to love and my childhood but you always manage to never tell me anything about you" I admit. "It's really annoying, I want to ask you about that stuff but you never give me the chance and it frustrates me that I don't know that stuff about you. I mean I know you've had no problem getting along with my friends and family but do you truly enjoy meeting them? Do you get anxious about it? What makes you anxious? Do you believe in true love? How did you grow up? Tell me!" I whine and I see Harry's eyes light up.
"You really want to know?" he asks genuinely surprised and I nod my head vigorously to show that I do. Before asking why he's so surprised. "I don't know, I guess no one I've dated really ever asked me that before. I'm sorry if I always avoid telling you, I think I'm used to just listening to other peoples opinions rather than talking about my own since I usually don't get to. In all honesty I do enjoy meeting your family and friends, I've never really had a problem being social growing up. But I think I've been a bit nervous since I don't want them to think a certain way about me over what they've heard on the news. That's one thing that annoys me, the way the press calls me a womanizer, I mean I don't think that I am and I feel like people just expect me to be one as soon as they meet me and they start treating me like one right away. That's why I like being with you, you don't see me like that and you care about me for who I really am, I don't know about true love but I like the idea of it. I also like the idea of being with you and I want to believe we will make this work. I also don't want you to think I'm not worth it, I'm afraid someone will make up a rumour one day or you'll hear something that makes you not want to be with me any more. I'm afraid I won't have control over what you think about me. And so I guess to answer one of your several questions; you make me anxious Ari" Harry responds while not breaking eye contact with me. We sit in silence for a while.
"Well thanks for sharing" I joke as I pretend to get up. Harry grabs my wrist to stop me and smiles.
"You're not funny" he says clearly joking before laughing, he pulls me in between his legs as we stay seated on the floor, and I lean against him as he leans against a couch. I play with his hand for a moment while I think about all he's said. "Say something Ari, you're making me nervous" he says and I think back to what he said a minute ago about me making him anxious.
"Do I really make you anxious?" I ask. I look back towards him for a second to see him nod his head.
"Not in a bad way though. Anxious like I want to make sure you're always happy, and that you're not feeling anxious or even uncomfortable oddly enough. I also get anxious that you may not feel the same way I feel about you or realize that I'm not worth it, but when you say you love me I feel all those nerves disappear. It's the best feeling in the world" he says and I blush, how does he care about me so much.
"Did you ever think I didn't care about you since I never asked you any of this before?" I ask.
"I don't think I realized. I mean you've asked me why I was upset a couple of times and I don't really ever get asked that, so I kinda took that as a sign that you cared. I don't think I realized till tonight, talking to you, how little people actually want to know stuff about who I actually am." He admits as he wraps his arms tighter around me.
"What about growing up, how did you know you wanted to be a singer?" I ask him. I already know a lot about how Harry became a singer, and how he loved music his whole life and how his family supported him and what kind of music he likes and how he likes to write songs and what he likes to write about but, I don't know why he started any of this in the first place. I mean I know why I became a comedian and so does he. He knows I fell in love with SNL in middle school and started doing stand up at 15 when I had no real friends or anything to do after school and how I joined the Second City since I heard about it from SNL and idolizing so many great comedians. Harry begins telling me about the music his parents use to play around the house and how he used to talk about music with his grandfather a lot. Music was a big part of his life and he started singing extremely early on in life. We spend a majority of the night staying up and talking, I learned Harry had a hard time dealing with his parents divorce and how he doesn't want to go through one himself. I learn about his school life and X-Factor days and his feelings throughout those times.
"I've been around people my whole life but I always still felt isolated and alone, until I met you. I feel like I can go to you whenever I want and you'll be there for me, I've never really had that before. I love you" Harry admits. We continue to chat for a little bit longer until we both can barely keep our eyes open and decide to head to bed. Tonight has been an extremely successful night in my opinion since I finally got Harry to open up to me. As I begin to fall asleep I hear Harry say something "thanks for being with me Ari" he says and I mumble something back to him, I don't know if it made sense but I'm too tired to talk. All I know is that I'm happy to be with him too.
...
"Ari are you awake? Ari wake up! Ari!" I hear Harry say as I begin to move around in bed, I don't know what he wants but it's woken me up. I look over at him with tired eyes and to see him crawled up on the bed lightly nudging my arm.
"What do you want?" I ask with a smile, still laying on the bed. I'm not tired but I am so comfortable I don't feel like moving, It's as though my head is hanging onto the pillow begging not to be removed.
"Get ready, I want to take you somewhere" he says before kissing my cheek and exiting the room before I have any chance to do or ask anything. I reluctantly get out of bed and make my way over to my luggage that was a couple feet away. I open it and get out a simple cute blue sweater and some skinny jeans which I put on before heading out to go talk to Harry.
"I'm ready, happy?!" I tease Harry as he gets up from the couch he was sitting on while using his phone to come give me a kiss. "Where are we going anyway?" I ask him, since he never actually said.
"I thought we'd go to the aquarium, I heard it's pretty cool, I mean unless you don't want to go" he says as he wraps his arms around my waist giving me a serious look and I smile.
"Of course I want to go!" I say genuinely excited, I haven't been to an aquarium in such a long time and would love to go. Harry and I go to the kitchen to eat the toast he had made for us before heading out to the aquarium. As we exit the hotel we are swarmed by paparazzi which is strange since they have never really been a problem here yet. I wonder why they were waiting out here today. They ask us questions but it's too crazy for me to have any time to pay attention to what they say. I lightly grabbed a hold of Harry's shirt to make sure I was following him as we passed through the crowd of photographers and into a car.
"Are you alright?" Harry asks me as we get into the car, clearly referring to the craziness that we just had to go through to get in the car. In fact, even now as we sit in the car, photographers are crowding the van to try and get a photo of us as our driver struggles to drive.
"Yea I'm fine, it's so weird, I wasn't expecting so many photographers" I admit and Harry agrees.
"I'm sorry, but they didn't hurt you or anything right? I wanted to try and protect you but I kept getting pulled forward by the crowd and had no way of turning around" he explains clearly concerned which is sweet of him considering I never even complained about the situation once. I love how he cares about me even when I don't ask him to directly.
"I'm fine Harry, I love you" I say before planting a quick kiss on his lips to try and get him to relax.
...
"Is that a catfish? That's definitely a catfish" Harry exclaims as he points towards some small fish in one of the large tanks and I burst out laughing. Harry and I tried naming all the fish species we knew on the car ride over here and could only name a few like a clown fish and generic stuff like dolphins before realizing we don't know much about fish. So, Harry's spent most of the time pointing at random fish asking if they were catfish since that was one of the few types we could name and we talked about it for a while since that TV Catfish also popped into our heads. We continue to walk through the aquarium and I am really having a lot of fun, this place is so cool!
"Hi can we get picture?" I hear a girl ask Harry and I as she taps our shoulders. We gladly agree before the girl politely walks away which surprises me, usually people want to talk or something but I don't mind, I'd prefer to just spend the day with Harry. We walk hand in hand, talking about the different fish and making some dumb jokes along the way. It isn't until the very I end I notice the girl we had taken a picture with had been following us the whole time taking pictures. I'm kinda annoyed this sweet moment I got to share with Harry was now going to be posted all across the internet but I choose to ignore it since I can't do anything about it. Harry and I grab a quick bite to eat at the small restaurant inside the aquarium before heading back to the hotel. We spend the rest of the night sitting around watching TV before heading to bed. Tomorrow Harry was going to be dropping his family off at the airport to say goodbye since they were leaving. We would be checking out of the hotel and heading back onto the tour bus tomorrow as well and since Harry's dropping off his family he'll join us later on and I won't see him for most of the day. Although I'm sad Harry won't be there the whole time, I don't mind since I'll get to hang out more with the rest of the band as well as Lou and Sophia both of whom I love.