|Y/n POV|
A month has passed since i woke up to that letter. Im sure he wrote one to everyone else. The only time i saw him was on tv. He said it was self defense and nobody but him was in the parking lot at the time of the murder.
I havnt talked to anyone. I stay in this lonely apartment. Sure the boys would text me from time to time, but id never answer.
I cant forget that he put his hands on me...again. I cried remembering what once was. He said he loved me. He told me hurting me was an act to protect himself and me. But all he really wanted to do was get me close just to beat me down again. After that coma he must of really changed and got use to treating me like i was a waist if space. I was simply just his punching bag.
Ive contemplated suicide but ive never actually done it. Hence why im still breathing today. I did cut and burn a couple of times. I dont know its like the pain just washes away when my blood is dripping or when my skin is burning. You know how fucked up you gotta be to smell your own burning flesh and not give two damns. But hey it made me forget, just for a minute, what it was like to be hurt and led on by Kalin White.
Sometimes i wish he'd come back as a changed man but hes been put behind bars for 5 years, for a crime he didnt commit. All day i had 'you were my everything' and 'Dont' on replay and cried.
I cant believe i let this happen. Not only did he go to jail for Myles he showed them the video of jumping me in the bathroom. That was the main part of his sentence. If he had good behavior hed be out by 2 years. Sometimes id get a call from the prison but i always denied talking to him. Sure i miss his voice and i havnt herd anybody elses but its hard for me. I mean how can it not, he made me believe he loved me.
Sometimes i go through his notebook just to read the unfinished music lyrics. This one lyric was my favorite
'Girl if your fallin, I'll be there to catch ya
Give me all your lovin', imma hold on tight
Let go of your problems, you know I'll protect you
Take me by the hand imma make it alright alright...'
Im not sure it just brings me in some type of trance.