Episode 13: FAMILY PORTRAIT
The stench was unbearable but Clare knew it was her duty to get the job done. She manoeuvred the baby, carefully holding him at his ankles as she wiped his bottom. It was 3:30 in the morning as she noticed on the alarm clock on her mantle. She was completely exhausted and looked it. Within a matter of minutes she had the baby in a clean and comfortable diaper; she almost felt like a pro at this. However, she was not a pro at late nights and early mornings.
She cooed the baby with playful words as she snuggled close and blew bubbles on his belly. He laughed which made her smile but nonetheless she was still tired. She yawned despite herself. She cradled the baby and sleepily whispered a song. In no time the child became weary and dropped off to sleep which she then took the opportunity to ease her tension as she rested on the bed.
Looking up at the ceiling with her son on her belly snoring sweetly she suddenly found herself overwhelmed. She started crying and the more she was trying to find a reason why, she was crying even more.
"I don't want her to see me like this," she whimpered, "But it can't be helped."
She looked down on the little boy and stroked his full head of hair. "Your aunt Darcy's going to be here tomorrow, bet you can't wait for that?" She grimaced with the thought that her older sister was finally returning home but home was definitely not the same as she had left it.
[theme song]
Eli found the icy dew on the grass more interesting than his Maths class. Sitting so close to the window he didn't draw too much attention to himself but then again he was so engrossed he wouldn't have cared much.
"Mr. Goldsworthy," called the teacher from the chalkboard. He had to repeat his name a third time before Eli looked up at him startled.
"Got a lot on your mind," teased the teacher much to Eli's condescending smile.
The door flung opened which stole everyone's eyes from Eli. Clare rushed in to the classroom, looking as though she was running for her life. She had no make up on and her hair was pulled in an untidy bun and to make matters worse she was trying to catch her breath.
"Good morning," she fluttered out, "Sorry to be late. I had a doctor's appointment and then I missed the bus and then-" She started rambling off but she was interrupted.
"That's alright. Ms. Oh said to look out for you for these things. No problem, we'll talk after class. Go take a seat. And next time, take your time okay." His words were sympathetic and understanding. Clare smiled gratefully, she thought that with Ms. Oh giving her special treatment would seem unfair but everyday it had been proven to come in very handy.
"Why are you getting such special treatment?" asked a girl rudely as Clare took up her seat.
"Because she actually does her homework on time," snapped Jenna rudely. She gave a thoughtful smile towards her friend who nodded her approval and thanks.
Eli studied Clare suspiciously and caught her eye which made her flinch. She turned her sleepy eyes from him and head first into her open backpack, looking very busy as she searched for her books. She had too much to think about and Eli was the last straw. She hadn't yet faced him on his "relationship" with Gracie and she wasn't sure if she wanted to either.
!-0_0-!
Eli strutted down the hallway, looking like the world had just fallen on top of his head. However, his emotions were the last thing considered by Bianca. "Ugh!" she exclaimed disgusted.
"What's the problem with you now?" asked Lander a little annoyed.
"No matter how much he's changed now, that thought still crosses my mind whenever I see that dweeb." She replied rudely.
"You mean the emo turned nice boy?" he accused.
"Yeah." she nodded, looking after the mysterious boy who turned the bend, "Ugh!" She repeated and showed her disgust. "I hate this..."
"Hate what?"
"What I saw him do? I hate this school. I hate everything." The fact remained what she saw was gross, despite knowing that Adam was indeed born a girl but that didn't help the situation much either, it was still gross and she had to see it. Thank goodness that the cross-dresser was finally out of the school for good. Apparently he was relocated to another school; the gossip being he couldn't find a date because everyone knew about his condition.
Bianca was busying herself emptying her locker out for the detention, "I hate detention. I hate homework. I hate school." She confided in her tall, muscular boyfriend, Lander Stevens. "I know what I want to do with my life," She slammed the locker with conviction, "And it doesn't involve numbers or stories."
Lander smirked boyishly, "You worry too much babes." He grabbed her hand, "Maybe you should focus more on me." He looked her in the eyes, "Don't you think it's time we should become official?"
Bianca smiled, "Took you long enough. You know what's the best way to becoming official..." She teased.
"What? I don't know..." He played along with her antics.
"Kissing in the hallway when lunch's over. Everybody will see us." She enticed his sensors the way she talked and caressed his chest.
"I'm gamed if you are?" he gave a flirtatious wink.
Bianca grabbed onto his shirt and pulled him forward but as she was doing so Lander happened to have noticed something more interesting than his girlfriend.
"What's wrong?" asked Bianca rudely when she realised her kiss wasn't coming.
"Um, nothing, babes. Just feeling a little red...I mean, a little embarrassed." He mumbled over his words still looking distracted before turning back his attention to her.
"You? Embarrassed? Not you..." Bianca was suspicious, "What's really wrong?"
"Something just made me lose the moment. We could try this again tomorrow. Promise. But I got to go now OK, babes." Without so much as an explanation he darted out of the hallway like a scared cheetah. Bianca was confused and showed it, in fact she was more than confused; the twin-horned beast was raging in her spirit. If only she had known that her boyfriend was under the red-headed fever himself but of a different kind. If only had she spotted Gracie behind her blowing kisses and waving invitingly.
!-0_0-!
Her eyes were burning with fury and every second it seemed she yawned. One might think she was bored to tears but Clare was quite actually on the verge of tears. She kept wondering how in the world had her world gotten turned upside down. And unfortunately, sitting alone in the middle of a very crowded café was not anywhere near the privacy she longed for to think straight which made her more on edge.
"You look awful, Clare,"admitted a voice she had not yearned to hear.
She looked up from her lunch with a bitter expression, one almost of anger, "Well, I should, don't you think?"
Eli took up a seat in front of her with his own lunch tray but he wasn't interested in eating. He stared at her intently, daring her to look him in the eye.
"I'm sorry, Clare but I've been pretty messed up and your parents still don't trust me with him yet," he apologized.
"And I agree with them," she snapped, "Instead of taking care of your son, you had strangers helping with him."
Eli sighed heavily. "You were the one avoiding me the last three days, not the other way around."
"I'm going through things myself too," she said emptily. She finally looked him in the eyes but by his reaction he almost regretted this desire in the first place. With the pain of a thousand insufferable soldiers, she explained in one brief, rambling list the number of problems arising in her life, "Jenna found out about the baby but she seems to understand, I don't know but I can't bear anybody else finding out especially her. My sister is coming home this evening, can you believe that? I haven't slept in two days and my mom wants to know why hasn't Eli come over to see Jake and then there's you."
"Clare...." he started with sincerity but he was stopped.
"You're making all these changes for her, changes that you would never have made for me." Tears sprung to life; ultimately she had lost the battle of holding it in.
Eli seemed to be upset by her words and drew closer to her and whispered in her ear but very audibly, "I look like this because now I have a son."
When he returned to his seat, he noticed a paralyzed Clare. He respectfully waited for her response.
"Your son?" Clare asked rhetorically. "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you looked like this for your super hot girlfriend."
"She's not my girl-" but once more he was interrupted.
"I can accept Gracie, I can. I wasn't avoiding her but you. You, I can't quite understand. Such huge changes for your son and yet you haven't made one effort to try to see him or know how he's been doing in three days, because..."
Her words were cynical and harsh. Eli held down his head in shame, he knew she was right.
"I lost my best friend," he finally muttered before he finally held his head up to face her once more, "And every new day I have to live with the fact that there's a child in my life which I killed years ago."
Clare was devastated by his last statement, "Please, don't bring her into this. It was an accident, a dreadful accident. Please, don't bring her into this." She begged.
"I can't." He started crying now, "I love him so much but everything seems to be happening that makes me feel like I don't deserve him. He means the world to me and not seeing him for a second crushes me, Clare, it crushes me." He was very poetic with his demonstration of his love for his son, "I get to see him a couple hours after school every couple of days and when I do see him, I'm under constant watch from you or your parents, like you don't trust me." Eli was grappling with his tears and misery and it showed, "I don't trust me either, who knows I just might kill him all over again."
They locked eyes once more but this time both read the same thing; dread.
"Eli," Clare outstretched a hand towards him in sympathy but he withdrew it quickly and gave her a bitter look.
"I'm sorry, weren't you trying to avoid me in the first place," he got up from the table wiping away his tears.
"Eli," she stopped him. An intense silence passed between them as he stopped to listen to her, "You want to play a bigger role in his life, in my family's life? Come over for dinner tonight, it would mean a lot to me." She was very anxious about his response, "And Jake." She gave a quick, sarcastic smirk.
Eli seemed to pick up on her trail of thinking and despite his array of negative emotions he managed a sarcastic smirk as well. "Meeting the aunty. A big step for me."
Clare smiled.
"I'll be there," he added with authority and he walked away from her.
Life was so fickle these days, Clare wasn't sure what was going to happen next but she was glad that at least something was turning out right. She was not going to have to deal with her sister's arrival on her own and Eli was suddenly right back where he was suppose to be; in her good books and in Jake's life.
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An extra layer of red lipstick was applied as Gracie admired herself in the mirror of the girl's bathroom. She was dressed rather provocatively with a mini-mini jean skirt and a tight top with loose buttons. Her hair was stylishly adorned in a messy bun and bright pink, long earrings to match the trinket holding the bun in place. She smiled deviously as though she had captured her rival; she was so proud of herself.
"It's about time you should be cleaned up by now," she pleaded.
The bathroom stall behind her opened and out walked Lander looking mesmerized. His face had few slightly erased red lipstick stains and many of them surrounded his mouth. In fact his mouth was now a pale pink. He was holding a thick bulk of tissue paper in his hand which was decorated in the same red hue.
"I'm going to need to get there by you. This thing is harder to come off than I think." He said as he came up to the sink and washed his face.
"I make an impression on all the guys don't I?" smiled Gracie determined and guiltlessly.
"You sure do!" chimed Lander as he dried off his face and smiled at her, "I'm not ready for the impression to be over with yet though. How about a date tonight?"
"Tonight?" she answered flirtatiously, rolling her eyes, "I thought you would never asked."
"Sound like my girlfriend now? You do know I have a girlfriend...?"
"You mean Bianca, right?" She acted as if she didn't know who Bianca really was, "I heard stories about her, the boiler room queen right?"
"Hey, don't talk like that about my girl? She's come a long way," Lander was on the defense, "In fact, what am I even doing here with you? I shouldn't have been doing this-"
Gracie stopped him in his tracks by placing a finger on his lips, "She doesn't have to know, does she? I'll wear red lipstick tonight too just for you." She replied teasingly.
Lander stupidly nodded as if under a spell. Gracie smiled wickedly.
!-0_0-!
"Oh, yes. Gracie's a nice girl, right, Eli?" asked Clare trying her hardest not to sound sarcastic. She was sitting at the table making conversation with her parents. They had asked who was the help Eli had had when Jake was staying with him.
"Oh, absolutely, a long time friend," mocked Eli though he was actually sincere about his words. Indeed, she was a long time friend and the truest but things were different now. Very different. "She was very helpful in changing the diapers. I always seem to get that one bit wrong, for some reason."
Her parents eyed him suspiciously as if to say, 'What kind of a father are you and you can't even get a diaper done right?' Clare felt as though her mother would make her thoughts come to light and decided to distract them quickly, "It's so good to see Jake joining us at the table, isn't it?"
"It sure is," admired her father as he looked at the littleboy in his baby chair. He was cleverly placed next to Clare just in case he too became hungry later or was in need for some attention, "It's nice to be back in this house again after so long."
He looked ashamed after the words left his mouth and another thick silence crept over the room with her mother looking both hurt and unabashed at the same time.
"It sure is..." Clare admitted. She really was happy to have her mother and father at the dinner table again in over eight months, though now they were seated as far as possible from one another. Her father on Eli's end and her mother just in front of Clare. Eli and Clare sat next to one another and there was an empty seat between Clare and her mom and two others adjacent to her.
"Mom," Clare hoped this would at least make this family dinner a little more peaceful, "What's the reason for the two empty chairs next to you? Dad could come sit next to you in fact." She offered.
"Actually, dear," her father started but her mother gave him a distinct look that spelt don't say it.
Clare found this suspicious. They had to be on good enough terms in order to have a mutual understanding as such as if they were keeping secrets but could not find the time to sit next to one another.
Jake started acting up and then released his tantrum in powerful cries. Clare took him out of the chair and started rocking him.
"He's probably hot, poor thing," oozed her mother confidently.
"You want to take him outside?" Clare asked Eli.
Eli looked shock that she had asked, "Um, sure." He gave a quick look over at her parents before taking Jake in his hands.
They looked absolutely annoyed by Clare's decision and as soon as Eli exited through the door, the judgements and lectures came flying.
"I don't like him alone with that little boy for too long. Thank goodness that Grace girl was there or I would've..." her mother started.
"This is a family dinner Clare and a very ticklish situation with your sister and...your sister coming home, why did you bring him over here?" her father asked devastated. Strangely he had paused before repeating that her sister was coming home. Why did he say "and"?
"Dad, Mom," she was becoming upset, "You just don't understand!" Her anger crept all over her face, "He's Jake's father and you should be lucky he wants to be in his life at all. Why are you guys pushing him away!!"
"Because, he's a, he's a...." her father held back the words he most desired to say but she knew it couldn't be anything good at all.
"I understand that now he's taken off that black gunk from off his face he thinks he's different now. He thinks by making a new change of outfit makes him a father now?" accused his mother.
"He's still a nuisance. A criminal, even." Her father almost seemed enraged but then regretful for his choice of description, "I mean, he took advantage of you otherwise there would be no Jake!"
"What?! Criminal!" bellowed Clare, "No one took advantage of me Dad!! I did what I did because I wanted to," she felt as she had to rectify herself, "He wants to be a good father and he is! He's not a criminal."
"A good father. Where was he when I needed someone to hold him for me while I prepared this special dinner today? Three days he hasn't once ringed in to see how his son was doing," her mother was furious, "I had to take time and dress him up and put him in the car and dropped him off to Grandma's a good few miles from here, just so we would have no interruptions in getting things ready. And he could have easily swung on over in his car and collected him, had we trusted him anyways."
"Why don't you trust him!" Clare was getting fuelled, "You knew I was going out with him and you acted if it was OK he was in my life. Why don't you trust him!" she yelled.
"Remember the first dinner he had with us? That's why!" her father commented. At the time of the said "first" dinner, she was merely using Eli as a means to draw her parents attention because she felt threatened by their rude behaviour towards one another thus leading to the divorce. It might've appeared that her boyfriend at the time was nothing more than a coy for their anger to turn towards her for a change.
"Because the two of you were eating at one another's heads," yelled Clare all fired up and her parents weren't backing down either.
"How dare you speak to us like this?" her father was aggravated.
"This divorce is the reason I have a baby now!!" she shouted.
The door opened behind them with an awkward-looking Eli, holding Jake in one hand and the door open in the other. He was holding open the door for their new guest.
"Hi! Goodnight!!" greeted Darcy happily as she beamed with pride upon seeing her family, "And who's the emo-kid with the baby?" She asked as though she thought it funny and indeed she giggled after asking it.
The enraged family were now soothing down after the eruption as they watched in shock and horror at Darcy's untimely appearance. They almost seemed numb, even Jake wasn't busying himself in a fit of tears.
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"Darcy!!" Clare was first to run up to her and hug her. Their embrace was emotional. Two very different sisters but one similar connection and they hadn't seen one another in so long.
"I missed you so much!!!" Darcy said excitedly. She fished around in her pants pocket, "Hold up a sec." She suddenly took out one large decorated bead necklace and placed it around her sister's neck, "For you. For a very productive life."
"Uh, thanks." Clare was a little unsure about the gift; it wasn't exactly a small and beautiful necklace.
"I have one for each of you," she greeted cheerfully coming into the dining room and greeting her parents. She placed the ugly beads around her parents' necks, "This one will give you wisdom," she told her mother and respectably to her father, "And this one will ward off evil spirits." She was beaming like the sun.
She looked every bit the Darcy she looked the day she left. Her brown hair in messy strands and oozing in her famous, happy go-lucky nature. She looked strong and independent and a newer, better person. She most definitely was happier.
"Umm, why are those two still there again? Do we know them, Mom? Relatives of ours?" Darcy asked as she noticed Eli closed the door behind him. Jake was silent now and Eli was a little more relaxed and less in shock.
"Well, honey, I think you need to sit down," her mother said as Darcy took the seat between her and Clare. She eyed the baby chair suspiciously as she sat down.
"You know how we told you that we wanted you to meet a very new and special member of the family."
Darcy nodded her head, "Uh, huh. Just like how I do too..."
Clare was suspicious by her words. Eli eased his way back to the table, trying his hardest to be unseen.
"Who had a baby now! Aunt Ellen again?" She said matter-of-factly, "But her son looks very mature already and why isn't she here with them?"
"Darcy...." started off her father in a heavy tone but then he sighed, "Why don't we eat first before we get down to business."
"But what about the other guests?" asked her mother, almost horrified.
"Diane?" asked her father upset, "Not yet. Don't mention them as yet."
"I know, but I wanted everyone sitting here at the table together as a family."
"They're having a little trouble at the airport but I left them with some other people from my group. Something to do with their passport and stuff; it was taking too long and they thought it best I hurry over here and they get a drive home with Hannah, a girl from my group. She'll call when she's nearing here. She actually remembers where I live, how cool is that!" She smiled.
Her parents nodded as though approving but Clare and Eli were stumped.
"It's OK, Mom, they had a huge feast on the plane and during the whole passport issue thing. They sure do know how to eat. They will have plenty of family dinners to look forward to but still leave some for them, it would be no surprise they would be hungry again when they get here." She beamed with pride.
"Are you sure?" asked her father.
"Oh, yes, I'm sure. They're good boys, they understand already that they are missing out on the dinner, hence why they whipped me over here as soon as possible. They're good boys."
"Who boys?" asked Clare curiously.
"Not now, Clare, please." her father said.
"But..."
"Not, now, Clare. Let's eat."
The dinner was relatively quiet, well mostly it would have been had it not been for the talkative Darcy. She shared her stories and adventures and misadventures. And every so often she was saying, "I wish I could talk to you guys about them....I can't wait for you to meet them".
"So, now we're all finished, I'm dying to know who's Aunt Ellen new bundling of joy is." She was delighted. She was making faces at the baby and smiling and touching him during the dinner.
"Darcy..." her father started, "Aunt Ellen does not have a baby and this is not her son."
"So, who are they then?" asked Darcy perplexed.
Her father sighed heavily, "Darcy, you're the aunt."
"What?" Darcy scratched her head confused, "I can't be an aunt....that would mean-" She turned to face her sister and looked at her as though she was a strange specimen, "Yeah, right. This is some kind of a prank joke. Not Clare!" She sounded so sure.
"It's true," nodded Clare. She looked ashamed and tried to look away from her sisters' bulging eyes, "I was trying to tell you over the internet last we spoke but the words won't come out..."
"What's true?" Darcy's happy demeanour seemed to be wearing away. She looked devastated and shocked, as though she was just told that she had three more days to live. She couldn't believe it, she didn't want to believe it.
Clare closed her eyes before continuing; this was so hard for her to do. Her eyes had tears in them when she reopened them, "I had a baby."
Darcy watched her with anger and disgust, "You...had...a...baby?" The words were hard to repeat and accept.
"And this is Eli, his father," introduced Clare in a melancholy tone. Eli nodded, unsure of what else to do. He almost forgot he was at the table; he was enwrapped in this huge family drama.
"Um, hi," Darcy waved naively over at Eli before she looked back at Clare. She seemed almost close to tears herself, "I guess I'm not the only one bringing home new babies then?" Her happy spirit was returning, "Now, I don't feel so bad for hiding my story from you. Why didn't you tell me?"
"I-I...I-" Clare started but a phone went off and interrupted her.
It was Darcy's cell and she was busily chatting into it, she smiled graciously before ending the call. "Hannah's admitted that things got a bit out of hand and the boys have to stay at the airport overnight. So tomorrow, we will see my surprise." She emphasized as if now she had ammunition enough to outdo her sister's news.
The entire table sat in anticipation waiting for these guests, of course some more expectant than others.
Music for this episode: Famiy Portrait - Pink
Tune in Next Week:
Episode 14: Good News, Bad News: Determination places Jenna back on the sidelines; Darcy's guests arrive