Madinah.
I was awake and dressed as early as 8.30am the following morning. I'd told Kate what to prepare the night before because I was determined to be at work on or before 9am today, I had to prove to my direct superiors that I was not some privileged girl who scored a job at my father in-laws company.
General met me on the dining table. I served him his food and served some for myself as well, I wanted to take it to go but he was not buying it.
I'd just rounded up and was wearing my sandals when a voice rang above my head, "good morning ya Madinah." The person before me was Laila, and she'd said my name, but I was almost sure she wasn't talking to me.
Adeel walked into the living room just at that moment, she shared eye contact with him before turning back to me. Did he put her up to this?
"I am sorry for what happened last night, I did not mean to offend you." I stared at her, her sincerity frightening me, i couldn't believe this was the same girl that called me fat on a table of people.
I found my voice and spoke up, "It's okay Laila, you don't have to apologize."
"Thank you ya Madinah." I looked at her in suspicion before quickly brushing it off and replacing it with a smile.
I got up and turned to General, "the driver is here, I am leaving now."
He simply nodded at me which was my cue to leave. The driver and my guards that I swear I went twenty years just fine without, were waiting for me. They opened the door for me and I got into the car, straight to the office.
*************************************
I rounded up a bit earlier than five pm today. My supervisor also informed me that I had a project that was supposed to be based in a different state, Bauchi state to be precise, and that I would have to go see the site for myself first.
It was not meant to be my project but my colleague who'd worked here far longer than I have, recently left on maternity leave, so I was put as a replacement. I simply told her that I'd get back to her because frankly I was not sure what Adeel was going to say. He did not seem like the type to stop me, but with the way he's very keen on security, I was worried he might be against it. If so, i am sure he could speak to my supervisor to assign someone else on the project. I really hated to be the employee who had her husband given direct orders on her behalf, but i had no choice.
I walked downstairs and outside where the driver was waiting, got in and he drove us straight home.
I took a shower and changed before coming downstairs and preparing dinner. Kate prepared the salaad while I prepared the food and together we were done in no time. I had her prepare the tea since i taught her the recipe while mary set the table.
I on the other hand lit up some bakhoor in the house until I heard the door knob turn and my husband walked through it.
"Welcome back."
He nodded at me, i dropped the burner and collected the few files he had in his hand, doting wife and all.
"Dinner is ready." I tell him as we walked further into the room and to the staircase area.
"I'm going to freshen up and pray first. Have you started praying?"
"Yes." I answered him since I'd just performed ghusl that evening when I got back from school and I'd already prayed the previous prayers.
I followed him to his room where I dropped the files on the dresser and then went to a different bathroom to perform ablution. He'd already laid the prayer mats by the time I got back so we both prayed Maghreb and said our adhkar.
General went downstairs while I went to Laila's room to tell her that dinner was ready, all she said was 'okay' but it was better than the usual eye rolls and hisses she gave me.
All three of us sat on the dining table a few minutes later with our plates nearly empty.
"My supervisor assigned a project to me today. It's based in Bauchi, so i have to go see the site." I broke the silence. General took what looked like the final bite of his food, he ate so slowly and methodically it almost seemed intentional.
Three minutes later, he turned to me, "we're going tomorrow inshaAllah."
"We?" I couldn't help but ask him.
He totally ignored me. I tried to ignore the burn but I'd gotten a bit used to his words lately, and what would it take from him to say a single 'yes'.
"Rukayya, you are going to stay with Aaliyah at daddy's house while we're gone." Laila said okay and he stood up, took his plate and went to the kitchen. It was actually one of the things I admired about him, he had such wonderful manners. That is if you exclude blatantly ignoring people.
Once we were done eating and the table was cleared, i took the teapot and cup and followed him to the living room. I served him some of the chai and passed it to him, he was working on his laptop it seemed.
He took a sip of it and glanced at me, "did you make this?"
"No, but it's the same recipe."
He continues to type of his laptop for a while before muttering, "tastes different."
"I will make it myself from now on." I told him.
I sat myself on farthest spot of the sofa he was on and contemplated a bit before speaking up, "how long are we staying there?"
He did not look away from his work when he said, "two days, i have work there."
I tentatively nodded before leaving him to his work and going upstairs. I changed into my nightwear, prayed and headed to generals room. The room was empty, i thanked Allah internally and quickly walked to the couch and laid on it. I am not going to let him sleep on this today!
My lips spilled out my duas as my eyes instinctively started to shut, until the sound of the door clicking open brought back my consciousness. I immediately shut my eyes back when i realized it must be my husband.
A few minutes later, his voice was above me, "I heard the door close less than ten minutes ago, i know you're not asleep."
I ignored him and shut my eyes tighter, "Maryaam." His voice almost got me to open my eyes, almost.
His silence, followed by the scent of his cologne so so close pried my eyes open. He was inches away from me, taking my breath and senses away as he moved closer.
"What are you doing?" I finally asked him.
His lips spread a bit, almost into a smile? "Go back to sleep, I'll take you to bed myself."
I sat up abruptly, "No."
His brows raised as a serious look took over his face, "either you move to the bed on your own or i do it for you."
I bit my lips, not liking any of his options. "I don't want you sleeping on here, its very uncomfortable and this is your room."
"And I don't need you playing righteous wife. I am also not into the habit of repeating myself."
"Please." I said as I got up, believing that he actually would not repeat himself.
"I will sleep with you on the bed."
WHAT? That was definitely not what I meant, my eyes widened as I stared at him. He passed me back a passive look and walked to the ensuite.
When he walked out of the ensuite about ten minutes later, there was only a towel wrapped around his torso. I shut my eyes and turned around quickly, the sound that followed that action of mine was.. a chuckle?
"What are you still doing there?" I turned back around and he was in sweatpants now, still no shirt. My eyes roamed his arms down to his stomach against my will, I thought I was big but he could easily pass as twice my size, both in height and muscles. His arms alone looked like it could break me in half.
He walked to the light switch as I continued to ogle his back, my husband was beautiful. Face, body and honestly even his soul. If only he wasn't so rude.
I felt his presence before me before I even smelt him, "Are you done ogling me?"
"I wasn't o-gling you." I stutter in my lie.
My head cast downwards as he brought his hands to my chin and urged me to look up, the headlights on the road and the glass in the corner of the room was the only illumination we had, yet when I did look up, his dark dark eyes looked so bright.
"You need to do something about this bashfulness." I furrowed my brows as I stared at him, did he think if there was something I could do I wouldn't have done it already?
"Do you remember what I told you on our wedding night?"
I will fulfill all of my marital rights to you in due time.. My eyes widened as I shook my head immediately, "No."
His lips lift by the side, "Shall I remind you?"
He leaned in, so so close, and then he let me go, "Get on the bed."
Did he really expect me to get on the same bed with him after he just threatened me? I walked to the bed slowly because I really didn't need him carrying me up, I laid on the farthest spot possible to him, so much so that I was barely hanging on to the bed. I pulled the duvet up and slipped underneath it as I started to mutter duas.
Ten minutes later I was unable to sleep, "Maryaam," Generals voice rang in my ears.
"Yes?" My own voice sounded small in comparison to his.
"I am not going to eat you up, go to sleep."
Is it so so weird that that actually calmed me? I shut my eyes and thought about my life, my marriage that has now become my life.
I did not speak on the phone with Ayaan throughout today, we'd only chatted in the morning. I haven't spoken to Abbie in two days as well, same as maama Sarah. My sisters and I only communicated through our group chat since I left, I oddly really really missed my family. My wedding was the one time we all bonded and I actually felt like I was part of the family, it made me a bit attached to them.
I thought about my husband. General, Adeel. I had never called him by his name, never even tried, I haven't heard anyone do so either. The name just felt so little in comparison to him, never in my life have I met someone who made me feel so small, who made everyone around him feel small. And I was so sure it wasn't intentional, but no matter how hard you could try, he was just so high up that he seemed unattainable.
Before our marriage, that had scared the daylights out of me. But I realized now that my husband was not nearly as bad as he tried so very hard to portray himself as, he was unapologetic, yes. Yet even in his silence he made sure everyone around him was okay, even while he was bossy, every single action of his was calculated and always in everyone's best interest. He was selfless and in the oddest way possible, he was kind.
He valued my opinion, he made me feel like I was in control of a lot of things, like decisions were mine to make. He made me feel seen and strong.
Fate had played the cruelest prank on me by making the most powerful man I knew my husband, especially when I was the meekest person I know.
******************************
General and I set out to daddy's house around 10am, we were leaving for Bauchi today so we went to bid them goodbye. It was about thirty minutes after zuhr when we left for Abbie's house.
I did not know where we were going until I found us by the gate of the house, the gate was opened before we even got there as though we were expected. When the car came to a stop, I almost could not wait for Robert to open it, yet I did because I didn't need to be making a fool of myself.
We walked to the front door and I pushed it open instead of knocking because the front door was never locked, it's a weird thing we do in my house. It's only ever locked when we're going to bed.
I walked infront of General and led us to Abbie's living room, I wasn't even sure if he was around, my thoughts spilled out of my mouth, "Abbie did not know we were coming, he may not be around."
"I called him." General says. I did not know he communicated with my father, but fair enough.
True to his words, Abbie was sat on the couch he always sits on in his living room. We matched our paces as we said our salaam, "Maryaam madinah!"
A smile took over my face as I walked to my father and gave him the most bone crushing hug ever, "Abbie, I missed you so much."
He chuckled and placed a kiss on my head and he got up to shake Generals hand, "General."
"Ina wuni." My husband shook his hand and knelt to the carpeted ground and settled there. It was a bit awkward considering I was now sitting on the chair Abbie had gotten up from.
So there was a person on earth my mighty general can sit below? A smile took over my face as I slid down to sit next to him on the carpet.
"Come on, a big man like you should not be sitting below anyone fa." My father joked with a chuckle.
"Get up both of you!" Abbie gestured and sat back on his seat. When my husband made no attempt to get up, I didn't either.
"Since you insist on discomfort, suit yourselves." He smiled and switched off the television, focusing his full attention back to us.
"How have you both been?" General answered him with an Alhamdulillah while my reply was a bit more detailed about resuming work and all.
"How has work been my son? You have been here for a long time this time around."
"Alhamdulillah, we are heading to Bauchi today in sha Allah. My leaving will be soon after we return." Now I turn sharply to face him, he was leaving? More importantly, he was leaving and I was finding out like this?
I pursed my lips and didn't say much for the rest of the time we spent in Abbie's living room. Next we went to maama Sarah's living room, her maid alerted her and she was out soon after with a chirpy smile.
"Manyan Baki nayi yau ba shiri?" (I have important unexpected guests today?)
I got up and hugged her, inhaling her scent, feeling every bone in my body relax. I had truly missed her! Even while we never spoke much, she was always looking out for me. She had her certain lapses as everyone does, but she was truly a mother to me. And for that I owe her plenty.
We settled down and she exchanged pleasantries with my husband, "I hope you're leaving my daughter here to spend the day with me?" She asked general with a wide smile, still holding onto my hand from her chair.
"Not today unfortunately, we are both traveling to Bauchi for work today in sha Allah. But I will bring her once we get back."
Maama Sarah obviously pleased with his answer prayed for our safe travel and got her maid to get us water. We spent over thirty minutes with her as I updated her and General used to his phone, answering her one or two questions.
Finally, we went to Mimi's side. I muttered some prayers by the door which caused my husband to side eye me, he would soon understand why I am doing so when he gets to meet the woman.
Her living room was the most extravagant of all, it smelled heavily of oud which was one thing I wasn't complaining about. Basma was sat on a one sitter couch,
To my utmost surprise, my little devil walked up to me and gave me a side hug, "Lafiya?" I couldn't help but ask her.
She giggled at my shock and muttered to me, "I missed you. Ya zara and ya ummi are not so easy to torment." I rolled my eyes and hugged her back.
"Ina Mimi?" I asked her,
"Let me call her." She then turned to general, "ina wuni." She blushed as she greeted him.
Did this little devil have a crush on my husband? I rolled my eyes once again as he answered her in a quiet voice, not even glancing at her. That's my husband, I know I can always count on him for bad behavior.
Mimi walked out about ten minutes after Basma walked in to call her. Both me and General were already sitting at this point.
She walked out with a wide smile I have never ever seen in my many years of living with her!
"Sorry to have kept you waiting General, ina wuni." She looked at him as she said the words, completely ignoring me as usual.
He glanced at her as I stared at his expression that changed ever so slightly, "it's okay, ina wuni."
He greeted her back, she sat on the couch opposite that and I took it as my cue to issue to my own greeting, "Ina wuni Mimi."
Her reply never came with her next words, "How has work been? How are your parents?"
Her questions were aimed at my husband.
"Ina wuni Mimi." I greeted her one last time. She glanced at me and looked back at Adeel, "can't you see I am talking to your husband?"
Her words spilled out with a smile that I knew she did not mean. "General, I was asking how your parents are."
"My answer can follow once my wife gets hers."
Butterflies went crazy in my stomach, his wife. Mimi was quick to mask her shock and do damage control.
She knew my marriage with him was arranged, she probably thought I was miserable and he did not care about me at all. Which may be true, but him defending me right now gave off a completely different idea.
"Haba madinah is my daughter ai. I talk to her everyday, kai kuma this is the first time we're meeting as in-laws. Amman ayi hakuri mai mata, how are you madinah?" (I am sorry for offending your wife *sarcasm*)
"Alhamdulillah." I smiled at her.
General informed her that we were traveling and she starts to ask us or rather him what we were going to do, because when I attempted to answer her, her reply was, "I was talking to your husband, daman ki na aiki ne?" (I wasn't even aware that you work.)
I bit my lips and continued to chant duas, I completely forgot how horrible this woman could be. She was one thing I did not miss one bit in this household.
I could also tell from generals expressions the exact moment he decided she wasn't worth his respect, so he not only ignored everything she asked him, a few minutes later, he announced our leave.
When we got up , she made sure to leave one last comment that surely got under my skin if none of the others did. "I can see all your happy weight madinah, take it easy." She said it in a mocking tone with a mocking smile.
I was the first to walk out of her living room, I told General I was going to go say bye to maama Sarah and scurried away. She was still in her living room so I told her we were leaving and she came to escort us.
Zara and ya ummi were not around so I told her I'd call them. General was in Abbie's parlor, maama Sarah and I met them there and then together they escorted us to the front door. Hugs were exchanged between I and my parents before my husband and I walked out of the house. A thick uncomfortable silence surrounded us as we sat in the backseat of the car.
"Does that woman always treat you that way?"
He was surprisingly the first to break the silence.
"Even worse sometimes." I tell him honestly. I had no respect for her, and judging by the way she acted infront of him today, she was not willing to hide her distaste for me.
"And you let her do so because?"
I didn't know what to tell him, i was not like him. I was not one to talk back and throw a fit, or even to report her and possibly cost her her marriage to my father. Mimi is Abbie's cousin, one thing I know for sure is that the fact that she was still in his house despite her attitude is not because he didn't know she wasn't kind but because she was his family before she was his wife. He is also an incredibly patient man, if he could find it in himself to be patient, who was I not to?
"Not everyone is as brave as you are." I tell him.
"Mhm and you're sure this is not due to some misplaced act of kindness or selflessness?" Sometimes it scared me how he had me written down to a tee while I couldn't even get a simple reply out of him at times.
"I don't wish to cause rifts between her and my father just because she is horrible to me."
"So you are choosing to protect her?"
I turned away from him and faced the window, feeling exposed. I didn't like this at all.
"You cannot keep everyone happy at your expense Maryaam."
"I know that." I faced him again.
"So act on it and speak up for yourself for once. Stop being a doormat for everyone else to walk on."
As he said all these he was looking down at his phone, as if I wasn't worth a glance even as he said encouraging words to me. One thing about my husband? He will tell you the truth whether or not it kills you, he has no idea how to strain his words. Yet in the weirdest way possible, i felt like I needed that.
His parting words left me thinking long after we got in the plane, and even as we landed in Bauchi state.
"You deserve kindness too."
He was right.
Uhmm👀 maryaam and our General? Is there something there or are we being delusional??
Let's take warning o, General said we can't change him🤭🤭 i guess we'll have to see about that.