I laid on Nat as she kissed up and down my neck. She was squeezing my chest and taking in the scent of my hair, her bare legs were holding my torso tightly.
Lottie was kissing in between my legs, running her hands up and down my thighs. She slithered up and allowed me to taste myself, and gave a proud kiss to Nat.
Suddenly though, we were in the plane; cold, naked and afraid. Everything shook and crumbled around us. I felt myself falling fast, trying to reach the two girls when I blacked out.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
That was the dream that kept reoccurring over the past two nights. I woke up the first night in shock with Lottie draped around me. I then searched for Nat who was sound asleep in the same spot, faced away from me. Still, it gave me comfort, and I drifted back to sleep in Lottie's arms.
Last night was the same thing, and I felt extremely groggy this morning. Sleeping on the hard ground caused my body to ache but getting to sleep with Lottie was so worth it.
She was still asleep and I wouldn't dare wake her up, especially with her arms still curled around me. I shifted my position to see the sky in the horizon; it was sunrise. It would feel a lot more peaceful without the given circumstances.
I saw Shauna in my vision, back perched against a tree, writing something in a journal.
I'd love to be inside her mind for just a minute. To be friends with Shauna Shipman must be so very compelling, something I wanted to experience for myself.
She looked exhausted, eyes dark and hair messy, but still strikingly beautiful in the radiance of the morning sun.
I could feel the tangles and knots in my hair and hated how dirty that I felt. Though I brought a hairbrush, it wasn't the same without a hot shower. I would give anything for any water source to wash myself.
I was starting to get uncomfortable with Lottie touching me because I felt so disgusting, though she probably felt the same way.
Lottie started to stir and eyes opened with weariness. She lazily kissed my forehead and held me tighter to her body. I kissed her neck, which seemed to strike something within her.
"Maybe we go to the woods later? Just the two of us?" She whispered. I nodded in delight and she kissed me again.
The rest of the girls started waking up, stretching and yawning.
Before they all began their day in full consciousness, Lottie left my side, like she had been doing these past two days. I followed her the first day and caught her sneaking medications, the same that I saw her take a few mornings ago in her house. I didn't want to ask her what it was in fear that she would abandon me in the nighttime, not wanting to sleep next to me.
I watched Nat wake up, she looked at me sitting alone without Lottie by my side and I could tell just from the look on her face what she was thinking.
She turned away and went to grab her toothpaste and toothbrush and I decided to do the same.
Luckily I brought a full tube of toothpaste, even though we were only going to nationals for a week, but I tended to overpack which I guess came in handy after all.
Unfortunately, toothpaste without water wasn't nearly as effective.
Laura Lee, who was oddly wide awake, stood up and clapped her hands.
"I believe," she announced, "that we should have a funeral for our fallen teammates, pilots and coach. They deserve a proper burial."
"Yeah, and we can't leave them out rotting in the open," Mari added, "they're starting to smell."
Everyone glared at her, especially Travis.
"A burial sounds like a great idea, Laura Lee," Jackie responded, and Laura Lee gave her a grateful smile.
Everyone was up for another day in the wilderness. All of us covered in dirt, mud and grass stains.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
The day consisted of everyone digging holes in the ground to bury the bodies in. Luckily, the soil was soft and easy to dig through without shovels.
The whole time I watched Nat roll her eyes at Lottie and I, who were helping each other all day. The work was hard and we were all sweating and thirsty and very hungry.
Once we finished the graves a few hours later, we performed somewhat of a service.
"Before we took off, I heard Rachel say that she was going to see Oasis at the Meadowlands next month. She was really excited. And she's never gonna hear "Wonderwall" again."
Rachel was on JV, I thought. To be honest, I lost count of who was coming on this trip, I was far too focused on Lottie, when maybe I should've been more focused on the game.
"Come on. Let's join hands. We'll pray for them," Laura Lee said, and all of the girls grasped hands.
I held onto Lottie's and squeezed it tightly.
"Rachel, you just moved up from JV, so we didn't really know you. But, in Trig, you never confused your secants and your cosecants. You seemed really smart."
"Anyone else?"
"I saw her carry a flute case once."
"Oh, Lord," Laura Lee prayed, "please accept Rachel Goldman into your arms so that she may fill your kingdom with music. Please accept Coach Martinez into your glory, too, and flight attendant Janet, pilot Robert, pilot Fred. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. Take me to your kingdom, Father. Reunite me with your love. Send me your Spirit."
As annoying as Laura Lee's faith could be, it really blanketed a comfort that surrounded the group. We all felt more secure, more relaxed, though just the slightest bit.
I noticed Javi crying, silently. But Travis didn't bother to help him, he just stood there with his head down.
Shauna offered her condolences and hugged Javi, which made me feel warm. I don't even think Jackie had even noticed what Shauna had been doing the last few days, that she was up significantly early, that she was always soothing Javi, that she was even her own person.
"Okay," Taissa declared, "I'm going to head out to search for any kind of water source, or town or anything. I won't be going far, but far enough to try to find at least something."
"Be careful, okay?" Van said, concerned.
Tai just smiled.
"I'll be good, I should be back in a few hours, way before dark. In the meantime, you guys should probably figure out a food situation."
She took her game water bottle and departed into the trees. Van gazed at her, longingly.
We all looked around at each other. No one wanted to say it, but Taissa was right. Our food supply was getting low and no one had come to rescue us yet. No one wanted to ration the food, because that meant that everything that was happening was real.
"Maybe we regroup in an hour? To gather and ration our food?" I suggested.
Everyone mumbled in agreement, except for Lottie, who verbally supported me in a meaningful manner, something that caused Natalie to look down at the ground and scuff her feet.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
"What?"
"Jerky? Really? This is all we have?"
"Yeah. We got to ration."
"Okay."
"Cut them."
"Yeah."
"Split this water."
"Here. Close your eyes and pretend it's bacon."
"Don't spill any!"
We were all gathered around the empty fire pit, organizing our rations.
I could feel the hunger pangs in my stomach. Lottie noticed the starving expression on my face and rubbed my back in consolation.
Jackie was scratching her arms and legs relentlessly. Just seeing her itch her body made me want to itch. All of the girls shuddered at her heavily scraping her skin with her nails.
"Hey, Misty said don't scratch," Akilah noted, "it could get infected."
"If poison ivy's what kills me out here, then I deserve to die," she remarked. It wasn't completely false.
We continued to split the food evenly for everyone, trying to make sure everyone had enough sustenance, because unfortunately candy bars and jerky sticks weren't enough to live off of.
Without a beat, Travis snatched two candy bars from out of our pile and trudged away.
"Hey!" Akilah shouted.
"Travis what are you doing?" Van retorted.
"Maybe you didn't notice, but we're kinda in a situation here, Flex," Lottie snapped, continuing to rub my back.
"Don't," Nat growled. Travis didn't seem to care, he continued walking away.
"Who died and made him the king of snacks?" Lottie asked brusquely, squeezing my shoulders.
"His dad, Lottie," Nat retaliated, "his fucking dad."
"Hey, lay off," I said abruptly, and Nat just rolled her eyes, scoffing. Lottie smiled at me with gratitude, enjoying the fact that I defended her from Nat. My stomach turned slightly.
"Nat's right," Jackie agreed, oddly enough, "we should cut him some slack."
"I guess it's fine if we all starve to death, as long as Travis's feelings are okay."
"We're not gonna starve to death. Okay? When the rescue team gets here..."
"If it gets here."
"Don't say that."
"I mean, it has been three days," Shauna added quietly.
"They're coming," Jackie told us, "they're coming."
I looked over at Misty who was sitting in front of Ben kind of eerily. Travis and Javi were somewhere on the other side of the plane, and the rest of us just sat with our heads in our hands, trying to ignore the aches in our stomachs.
"Guys!" Taissa shouted from afar.
We all perked up, seeing her dash back through the trees where she came from.
"Guys, there's a lake," Tai exclaimed, "there's a lake. I saw it from that hill. It looks about four or five miles away."
Travis and Javi walked out from behind the plane, curious of what was happening.
"Do you think we could hike it?"
"It's pretty rocky, but yeah."
"Uh, we, uh, we can't... we can't just leave," Jackie stammered.
"We've got two days of water, tops. And then what? Just sit around and die?"
"What if the rescue team comes?" Jackie demanded.
"Do you think they're taking their time on purpose? If they knew where we were, they would be here already," Tai replied, hastily.
I hated to admit it, but I thought that Tai was right.
"You don't know that," Jackie said angrily.
Tai ignored her. "What do you think coach?"
"I don't, I don't know," Ben sighed, "Uh, I mean, you'd have to leave me behind, I guess, but whatever."
"We could make you a stretcher!" Misty piped up.
Jackie seemed amused by that idea.
"Seriously, if we take turns-"
But Jackie cut her off.
"N... no. This-this is bullshit. I say no. Okay? No way."
"Let's put it to a vote," Taissa proposed, "all those in favour of waiting here?"
Jackie's hand flew up instantly. A few girls raised their hands, hesitantly, including Lottie. It didn't surprise me, really. She wouldn't want to leave her dad's plane behind. Plus, when Lottie was comfortable, she rarely liked to push herself outside of that comfort zone.
"All those in favour of the lake?"
Nat stuck her hand in the air, and I joined her.
Lottie didn't seem pleased.
Misty raised her hand as well, along with a few other girls. Surprisingly, Shauna broke the tie by holding her hand up last, and Jackie didn't like that, it was written all over her face.
"Then it's settled," Taissa affirmed, and we all gathered all of our belongings.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
Taissa didn't lie, the hike was rocky. We trudged through dips and holes in the ground, our bags heavy and burdensome.
Lottie and I didn't speak much during the walk, I guess she wasn't sure how she felt about us voting differently, especially since we were usually always on the same page.
I noticed Nat and Travis walking together in the back, which made me feel uneasy. I tried to shake the feeling, and focus on Lottie next to me. She wasn't thrilled, especially because she was so pampered. All of this heavy lifting was new to her.
"Let me take your bag," I insisted, and held it over my shoulders.
Despite being relatively short and outwardly soft, I was fairly strong. There was a period of time where Taissa and I went to the gym together almost every day. She tried her best to convince me after everyone else was pretty adamant on not joining her. I agreed and I ended up gaining a lot of muscle, which I think Lottie secretly liked.
"Thank you," she smiled, and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ears.
I could hear Shauna and Jackie bickering behind me. Jackie sped walked up to Lottie and I, her arms crossed as she carried her bag on her shoulders, whining quietly.
"Why don't you have a bag?" She asked Lottie, but then noticed how I had two and just rolled her eyes and stomped past us.
"One sec," I whispered to Lottie, and slowed my pace down so that I accompanied Shauna.
"You okay?" I asked her.
"I'm fine," she responded, dryly.
Taissa caught up to us and slung her arms around our shoulders.
"Thanks for having my back during the vote guys," she said.
I started to offer her a statement of no worries, until Shauna cut me off.
"I didn't have your back. It was just what I thought."
Taissa glanced at me. "Well, either way, it was the right call."
"You don't know that. I mean, we think we know what we're doing, but really we have no clue," Shauna answered hastily and sped up past us.
"Jesus," Tai muttered.
"Don't worry, I think she's just upset that Jackie's mad at her for not agreeing with her in the vote," I told her.
"That girl needs to learn some independence," Tai stated.
I disagreed. I didn't think Shauna needed to learn how to be independent, it was evident that she had her own thoughts and feelings. I just thought that Shauna didn't need to put Jackie Taylor on such a high pedestal, because Jackie Taylor wasn't a god, she was just a girl, but Shauna worshiped her like one. I guess I couldn't really judge, because I looked at Lottie the same way.
"What's that smell?"
"I don't know."
"Holy shit."
Down below us lay a bloody carcass of a bear. Flies surrounded it, devouring its flesh, buzzing in delight. Maggots had taken over its insides, causing a foul stench to be released from it. The bear was mauled and sliced open, and whatever was feasting on it was clearly a happy predator.
"Oh, God, I'm gonna puke."
"Whoa. Sick."
"What could've done that?"
"A wolf, probably," Ben responded.
"A wolf can kill a fucking bear?" Nat wondered.
"Wolves can kill anything if the pack's big enough," Ben claimed, and scrunched his nose from the smell.
"This shit is way longer than four miles. What if we missed it?"
"From the angle of the sun, it looked just left of due north," Tai said.
"Oh, great."
"'Left.' That's a precise way of doing it."
"I'm not a fսcking cartographer."
"Or maybe you saw a mirage."
Van stopped in her tracks.
"Oh shit," she trailed off, "oh hell yeah bitches!"
We all followed her eyesight and saw the lake, the water clear as day and as blue as the sky above. We all raced down the hill, cheering and squealing as we approached the body of water.
Van stripped down into her bra and underwear and bolted into the lake.
"Guys, come in! It feels fսcking great!" The ginger whooped, splashing around.
All of us pulled and pried our rotten clothes off. I stared at Lottie, who was in tiny ivory underwear and her white lacy bra from the party. It took me back to her room, kissing her body, toying with the bra until it slipped from her chest, sucking and squeezing her chest, consuming every ounce of her.
I stripped to my black underwear and sports bra, and Lottie also eyed me. A slight blush was forming across her face as she could see the faded hickeys that were tracing my chest.
"Holy shit Taylor, I can't believe we just never noticed your tramp stamp before," Mari exclaimed, touching the tattoo as if it were an ancient artifact.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
Lottie and I sat on a park bench, drinking a bottle of vodka that was mixed with gatorade out of a brown paper bag. Lottie's eyes were tired and drunk and she couldn't stop giggling.
We were right across the street from a tattoo parlour that's sign was glowing red, as if it were tempting us.
"Mmm Taylor," she slurred.
"Yes, Lot?" I responded in the same manner.
"I would give you absolutely anything if you went and got a tattoo right now."
"Fuck no, no way," I laughed.
"What are you, a pussy?"
"Noooo," I said drowsily, "but it's so, it's so expensive."
"Mmm, I have my dad's credit card, he'll never know princess," Lottie hummed in intoxication.
"Princess? I like that," I beamed idiotically, "Fine, if I get a tattoo right now, you have to call me princess forever and ever and ever."
Lottie laughed foolishly.
"That's it?"
"Anddd," I garbled, "you have to give it a kiss. And swear on your life you'll never tell anyone ever. And buy me pizza."
"Deal, princess."
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
I grabbed my shampoo and conditioner out of my bag and filled my water bottle and gave my hair a good rinse before hopping in the lake. I felt so much better after washing myself off. I could feel Lottie's eyes on me as I washed myself, and confidence overcame me.
I looked up and saw Nat watching me as well with the same fixation as Lottie. As soon as she knew that I caught her, she whipped her head away, but Lottie kept her eyes on me the whole time.
I darted into the lake, the water was cool and refreshing. I lept on top of Lottie and she laughed as I hopped on her back in the water. Taissa stood at the edge of the leg, hands cupping her hips in pride. We all splashed around in serenity, feeling like ourselves for the first time in days.
The sound of laughter and cheering was enough for us to forget about the reality of our situation, for just a few minutes. Playing in the water like kids again allowed a minimal escape.
I checked out Natalie, who was eyeing Travis. I clenched my jaw and chose to ignore it, focusing on the beautiful woman in front of me.
Lottie swam over to me, holding the small of my back in the water, and squeezed her hands over my ass.
"I know you love this bra," she smirked, "so why don't we go find somewhere to put it to use?"
Her hair was slicked back from the water and curled at the ends. Her face was glimmering from droplets, removing all remains of dirt that stained her face. It was enough to drive a girl mad.
I could feel my heart beating quickly and agreed embarrassingly fast to Lottie's suggestion.
As we started to swim to the shore, Lottie suddenly paused.
"Do you see that Tay?" She asked me, and I tried to crane my neck to see her line of vision.
"What is that?"
"It looks like a reflection."
"Holy fuck," I said with realization, "guys there's something on the hill!"
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷
"Here it is, here it is," I was out of breath from storming up the hill.
On top of the hill stood a dilapidated wooden cabin, that was covered in moss and rot. But still, despite its outward decaying state, it seemed intact to live in.
Luckily, the door was open and we flooded in, not bothering to practice etiquette.
"I don't see anybody."
The girls all began to chatter frantically.
"Hello? Hello?"
"Is anybody in there?!"
"Hello!"
"Hello?"
"Hello! Anybody home?!"
"Hello? Is anyone here?"
"Maybe they just went on a hike?"
"Yeah, like a decade ago."
"It reeks in here."
We gathered anything we might have needed; food, flashlights, first aid, tools, anything that would help us survive until we were rescued.
I heard a can open and drop to the floor. Someone insulted Jackie for opening the can.
"Ugh. fսck," she complained as a disgusting scent filled the cabin and mold was spread over the floor, "Gross. See, this is why we should've stayed in the plane!"
"Yeah, well, we didn't. So this is helping how exactly?" Van muttered.
Jackie's brows furrowed in frustration.
"This is a fսcking nightmare," she scowled and stomped out of the cabin.
I rubbed my temples in irritation and looked to Lottie for comfort, but her eyes were wide in fear.
"Lot? What's wrong?" I asked her.
"I dunno," she answered, "I just have a really bad feeling. I don't know if we're supposed to be here."
Her statement was pretty ominous, but I decided that she was just afraid of having to stay here for a few days while we waited for rescue.
"It'll be okay, Lottie, I'm sure we won't have to be here long," I assured her, but that didn't seem to help.
"We might be stuck in the middle of nowhere, but, hey, at least there's pοrn," Van sung, holding up a pile of dusty magazines.
"Holy shit."
"I'm not kidding. Look."
"Gnarly."
"Whoa."
"Oh, my God."
Lottie hurriedly made her way out of the cabin as a few of the girls and Travis looked through the pornography. I followed her out.
"Lottie!" I called out to her. "Where are you going?"
"I think I just need to take a walk," Lottie said, absently.
"I'll come with you," I suggested, "maybe we can have our moment alone?" I tried to lace my fingers through hers but she pulled away.
"I think I just need a few minutes alone if that's okay," she told me. My heart ached. She didn't want me to go with her? After just half hour ago saying that she wanted to go somewhere in the woods together to hook up?
"Oh, uh, sure okay."
She kissed my cheek and trailed off, something looming over her. I found myself disappointed at her blowing me off. I sat on the rotting wooden deck of the cabin, cool from the dampness of my hair.
"Hey stranger," Natalie said from behind me, "Your girlfriend ditched you?"
"She's not my girlfriend," I muttered.
"Clearly."
"Is there something you want?" I clapped back, not bothering to look at her.
"Is there something you want?"
"You ask me that and we'll be here for a while."
And to my surprise, Natalie let out a laugh. It was short, light, but meaningful. She took a seat next to me, her arm brushing mine.
"I can see how she looks at you Taylor," Natalie commented, "You obviously mean a lot to her."
"Yeah," I replied, unsure.
"Give her time. But if you ever find yourself waiting for too long...," She faded.
I stared at her, getting lost in her eyes that looked back at me in wonder.
Natalie was a girl who was so noticeable, yet so unknown. Blonde hair and chiaroscuro blue eyes that could capture the attention of anyone from afar, yet an incomprehensible persona underneath a tough exterior that you would have to be lead into blindly to figure out.
Nothing and everything about Natalie Scatorrcio was unnoticeable.
Whatever was happening was brought to a standstill by the shouting of Coach Ben. Natalie and I rushed to the other side of the cabin, where Ben was on the ground, cursing and sobbing.
"Fսck! God! Fսck! Fսck! Fսck! Why?! Goddamn it!"
The team stood around him, watching him curse out his leg as if he were a ten year old boy who fell off his bicycle.
"Fսck you. Fսck you! Fսck you! Fսck you! Goddamn it!"
On cue, Misty rushed over to him and knelt beside him. I could see Lottie hurrying back from her walk after hearing the commotion.
"What the fսck do you want?!" He shouted at Misty.
"Hey, hey, hey, it's... it's...," she tried to soothe him, reaching her hand out to comfort him.
"Get the fսck away from me, Misty!" A loud slap rang throughout the air. Misty gasped and held her face.
"What the fuck Coach?! Calm down-" I pushed my way through the crowd of girls to try to defend Misty, but she simply put her hand up and shooed me away and Nat grabbed my arm and shook her head.
I watched Lottie frowning from afar and I shook Nat's hand off of me.
"Come here. Come here. Come here," Misty repeated, and slowly wrapped herself around Ben, "it's all right. It's all right."
He gave up trying to push her away and allowed himself to sink in her arms.
"I can't just... I can't just be like this now. Why couldn't I have died?" He cried. A lump formed in my throat and I looked across at Lottie for comfort. Her expression told me to stay calm and I followed her command.
"Because we needed you. And I'm here for you, Ben. I'm here for you," Misty shushed him and rocked him in her arms. Ben seemed as if he were nothing more than a child who needed help, which made me start to lose hope in any kind of leadership model to help get us through this experience.
The girls started to disperse and I abandoned Nat to reach Lottie, taking her arm and dragging her somewhere private.
Once we were out of sight and ear shot, I held her two hands in mine.
"I need you," I quoted Misty Quigley, "and I'm here for you. But please, don't push me away."
She nodded and kissed me, slowly and gently.
"Whatever bad feeling you have," I continued, "I just need you to be there with me okay? So let's put those worries aside, and get ready for the night, yeah?"
Lottie agreed, and put her intuition aside.