Hampton University, Virginia
Friday, 1/2
"You Don't Know Me"
{Misunderstood by Rod Wave}
"And 5...6...7...8!" Coach MiMi yelled while snapping her fingers to the beat.
She walked around, watching the cheerleaders go through their halftime dance routine. The music continued playing and she continued counting in order to keep them in sync. They were doing alright. Dess counted in her head as she danced. She stomp her feet, shook her hips, waved her hands, and moved her body all around. She noticed herself getting better at picking up the moves and keeping up with the veterans.
It may have been too early to say, but she could see herself being a captain or co-captain her junior year. She was taking it one day at time and working on herself more individually. It was going to take time.
"1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8." MiMi continued counting and snapping her fingers.
"Last one ladies!" Coach Louis yelled in the middle of MiMi's counting. As the song started to come to the end, the girls did their last eight count before doing a pose.
MiMi clapped her hands, amazed at the girls and how good they looked. This was the only practice they had that all the girls were amazing. She loved that.
"Okay, girls!" MiMi exclaimed, clapping her hands still. "Y'all are looking better and better."
"No, seriously," Louis chimed in, smiling from ear to ear. The girls all happily exclaimed, hearing that from their coaches. Practice and even the games, they struggled and today was the one day that they were good.
"Alright, everyone, we need to have a real talk before we part ways! So, please gather around!" Louis shouted as she walked over to the bleachers were MiMi was standing at.
Everyone gathered around to form a huge circle around their coaches. Dess stood off to the side and used the time to catch her breath. MiMi and Louis stood on the bleachers, so everyone was able to see them.
"Okay, before we leave, MiMi and I feel the need to talk about some issues that's been going around on campus." Louis began, clasping her hands together.
"Yes. We both know that this is a college and that you all are considered adults, but there's still stuff we need to talk about and understand." MiMi added.
Louis continued, "With that being said, we just want to address that despite having your freedom, you all need to be careful and aware of your surroundings. Especially, the ladies."
"We heard about recent rapes and sexual assaults that's been occurring on this campus. And as sad as it is to say, this is something that happens on this campus often." MiMi informed them.
"And other universities." Louis added. "But, since we're speaking on Hampton, the rape rates are high. Ladies, I understand that these upperclassmen are attractive. I know that they're going to try and talk to you, but you all must know that they're no good. They're all just trying to get into your panties."
"If you plan on talking or messing with one then that's your prerogative. No one is going to tell you what you can and cannot do, but you need to be mindful that things happen. You all are obligated to say no to any form of sexual activity if you're not ready or uncomfortable." MiMi said, looking around at everyone.
She made eye contact with a few of the girls. She didn't know their situation, but wanted them to know that she was there for them.
"And if any male or female takes advantage of you, please know that you have help and can tell any one of us. We will be there for you every step of the way. We just want you all to be mindful that being rape is not your fault. You do have people around that'll help you. You do have resources that's there to assist you and your needs. Please do not be scared to let someone know."
"Even if one person doesn't believe you, someone else will. Remember that!" Louis emphasized so it was clear.
"Are we all good?" She questioned, looking around at everyone. The ladies and the few dudes nodded their heads, taking in what Louis and MiMi said.
"Good. Y'all are dismissed." MiMi ended the meeting. Her and Louis stepped off the bleachers and walked off.
Dess gave a small smile to her coaches as they walked by her. She knew why they decided to have this conversation. Just a few days ago, Ashley, her best friend went on Twitter and announced that she was raped. That automatically sent an intense amount of anger. Everyone was campus was speaking on her, saying good and bad things. Dess wasn't sure if Ashley heard or seen anything that was being said about her. She tried texting and calling and even showing up at her dorm. Trying her best to get in touch with her friend before anything else happens.
She didn't want anything else to happen.
She made a plan to go back to Ashley dorm later today. For right now, she wanted to get out of here. She turned on her heels, approaching the bleachers where her stuff was. She moved her bag out of the way of Neveah and Melissa who were talking to the other cheerleaders. They were overly loud with their conversation that someone from across campus could hear them. It was annoying when you weren't in the mood for all the obnoxious yelling and screaming.
"The only reason they had this conversation is because some freshmen girl is going around saying that you got raped by a few dudes here. Come to find out she's lying about the situation." Neveah spoke, answering a question that was asked.
"A freshmen?" Melissa asked for confirmation. Neveah nodded her head, doing a quick glance over and saw Dess.
She looked back at her and placed her hand on her hip. "Oh, hey!" She dragged out dramatically.
"Hello," Dess replied softly, stuffing her things back into her duffel bag.
"How's everything?" Neveah asked, creating a conversation. Dess tucked in her lips, wondering why Neveah was talking to her.
They rarely spoke since she joined the team. All Neveah did was express how much she didn't want the newbies on the team. How they weren't doing as good as the vets, and other unnecessary and rude shit. Dess had a feeling some of those comments were directed at her, but she always ignored them since she never mentioned her name. She still knew.
"Everything is chill." Dess answered. She wasn't in the mood to speak to her since she had a lot on her mind. She was going through a lot as well. Between crying while receiving head and eventually getting her period earlier today, she was a damn mess.
"That's good. Did you hear about that freshmen and saying she was raped?" Neveah bluntly questioned. She wanted the scoop and figured a freshmen would know all about it.
Dess shook her head, "No, I don't know. That's unfortunate though and I hope she's alright." She replied, struggling to zip her bag up. She blew out an annoyed breath. She wanted to get out of there and was moving too fast.
"I mean I guess. I heard that she lied about the situation just to get clout. Y'all freshmen this year are ruthless." Neveah continued the conversation.
"I highly doubt that girl lied about being raped. You should stop being insensitive." Dess told her, over it already.
Neveah stared at her, debating if she wanted to keep going with her interrogation. She wasn't getting much, so she found it pointless. Dess was just pointless and useless as a whole. She ended the conversation there and went back to Melissa and her friends.
Dess thanked God in her head that Neveah stopped talking to her. She wasn't in the mood. Finally having her bag zipped up, she tossed her head back and blew out a breath. She felt herself about to cry. There was no solid reason that she could think of either. She was just emotional.
The sound of the gym door made a few people turn in that direction. Dess looked and saw Shai, feeling a bit better that he was here. She grabbed her bag and sped walked to him like she was on an important mission. She was just happy to see his face. Shai saw her coming his way and smiled. He put his arms out, Dess falling right into them. She buried her face in his chest, instantly regretting it once she felt his sweat.
"Eww," she muttered, moving her head away from his chest. She looked up at him, Shai giving her a wink.
"Wassup, pretty girl." He greeted her, wiping her face with his sleeve. He should've mentioned he was sweaty before she hugged him. However, he saw the look on her face as she approached and saw how much she needed one.
"Hello," Dess responded softly. "Did you come from training?"
"Yeah. I have something to tell you too." He mentioned, wiping her face again. He could see how glossy her eyes were becoming and knew what that meant.
Since yesterday, he's been watching her closely. She's been more quiet than usual. Here or there, tears would cascade down her cheeks with no further explanation as to why. He was confused, but realized that he needed to stay mellow in order to deal with her. Her feelings were more important than his at the moment.
"You wanna go out tonight?" Shai switched the subject. He reached for her bag, tossing it on his shoulder, and grabbing her hand.
"Where are we going?" Dess asked, taking her hand away. She held onto his bicep instead, feeling more secure and safe like that. Shai didn't question it and lead them to the door.
"We'll figure that out. So, yes?"
"Yeah."
🏀
Shai slipped a five dollar bill in the tip jar. He thanked the guy as he grabbed the two trays of cheese fries. He excused himself from the line and headed back to the bench. For their date, Shai chose to take them away from campus and out into the city. Lucky for them there was a food festival going on at the same time they came out.
Multiple residents of the city and even tourists were checking out the several food trucks selling their . They settled on a classic American food truck selling chicken, cheese fries, empanadas, and more. Shai cut through a long line to a Jamaican food truck and saw Dess sitting on the bench next to the large snow covered tree. He adored the sight of his girl sitting under such beauty while looking like a goddess.
A gorgeous goddess.
Shai didn't bother to stop the smile that was forming on his face. Sometimes he had those moments where he wondered how he got so damn lucky with Dess. He was more than happy to have her.
"One cheese fry for m'lady." He spoke, making Dess turn in his direction. She gave him a small smile, taking one of the trays out of his hands.
Shai sat beside her, letting out a deep breath. He poked his fork in his fries while scooping out the scenery. He reminded himself to come out here more often whenever he was bored at school. It would be more helpful for him and his mental. It was also a good way for Dess and him to have a moment to themselves. And that's what they needed right now.
He turned to look at Dess, checking on her. She was also looking around while casually eating. He didn't want to interrupt so he turned away and began eating. He slowly nodded his head in approval of his delicious fries. It was a basic dish, yet still satisfied his taste buds.
"This..." Shai dramatically pointed his fork at his food. "...shit is good. Like fantastic!" He excitedly continued his sentence.
Dess giggled at his dramatic statement. However, she did agree with him. The cheese fries were indeed good. She couldn't remember the last time she had this hot, salty, cheesy snack. Something quick, tasty, and easy.
"It is good," she agreed. She picked up a cheesy fry and placed it in her mouth. A smirk showed on Shai face for some reason. He was unsure, but loved watching her eat.
"Mhm, before we talk about last night, I have some news to share." He said while picking at his food. He gathered his thoughts, forgetting the nasty things he was thinking about, and focusing on the important things. In the back of his mind, he still was thinking about her lips.
Both of them.
"Ooh, yes." Dess beamed, happily to know whatever he had to tell her.
Shai grinned, feeling a bit better about his news because of her. He had mixed emotions when he found out about it and didn't know how to handle them. Telling Dess was his go-to solution.
"Of course you know I'm training with Demetrius for my own benefit." He began, Dess nodding her head to let him know she was listening.
"Right, so today while I was in the gym with Demetrius and we're running through plays, he mentions the team. He's telling me how they have an away game this weekend and wants me to come along." He continued.
"Really?" Dess looked at him weirdly. She was a bit surprised to hear that but soon realized that Demetrius never had an issue with Shai. It was Danny Adams.
"Wait! What about Ad-"
"I have no idea," Shai answered since he already knew what she was going to ask. He was more confused than her.
He was also skeptical and had every right to be. Mentally, he didn't have an issue associating himself with the team again. It was the physical part that was tearing him up. He wasn't expecting his freshmen year to end up like this, being picked on while he tried to play a sport he enjoyed. Having to constantly deal with teammates who knew nothing about him, yet came at him every second was draining. But, his hands was itching to touch the court. Decisions had to be made. Quickly.
"So, what are you going to do?" Dess asked a good question. Shai shrugged his shoulders unaware of what he was going to do. He didn't think past that, so he had nothing.
One side was to go. Go see the team play and learn a little something. Maybe it'll be useful on his part and help him with Adams. The man will see how bad the team was doing without Shai's added sauce. He wasn't trying to be cocky, but from what he heard the team wasn't doing so good. Bask to back loses. It was embarrassing.
The other side was to say fuck Adams and the team altogether, and continue doing his own thing. However, being on his own wasn't doing him much good. Yeah, practicing with Demetrius was cool and all but that's all it was. Practice. No real game. No real competition. Just Shai by himself. And he's been by himself for a long time and that never lead to anything good in his opinion. Just more loneliness and sadness. He wasn't liking it all that much like he thought he would.
"I think I might go. See what's up," he responded once he had his thoughts together.
"Are you sure?" Dess gave him a concerned look. She knew him all too well and knew that he was only agreeing because of his desire to get back on the court. She wasn't all the way sure if it was the right idea or not.
Shai had to determine that.
"I'm sure," he confidently answered.
"Okay."
"Good."
A short minute of silence overcame them. Dess went back to eating while she waited for the most awaited conversation to come up. She spent all day trying to come up with a reasonable explanation for her behavior. More so, she was embarrassed to even speak on what happened yesterday. Crying while receiving head? That was bonkers. And for that to be her first time made it even worse.
She didn't even want to talk about it, but knew Shai wanted to. That was the type of person he was. When he saw her hurting, inside and out, he wanted to talk about it. Dess had to just used to that feeling of being heard. Though she was an outspoken child, that didn't mean people listened. It was pretty rare. However, last night was one of those memories she wanted to forget forever. Bury deep down in her brain and never bring up again.
"Be honest with me," Shai broke the silence. "Have I been aggressive lately?" he questioned.
Dess furrowed her brows. "Aggressive?"
Shai nodded, "Yeah, aggressive. Like demanding or possessive. Or overall pushy towards you in particular," he went into details to clear up any confusion.
Dess made an o shape with her mouth. Her eyes scanned around while her brain ran a mile a minute. The silence answered Shai's question already. He turned his body straight, holding tightly on his tray of fried. This was where it got serious. Deep down in his heart, he felt like he was doing too much and was coming off a certain way towards her. He could see that he was doing so towards others. Being mean and nasty, and felt like it was the same for Dess. A mistake.
"Aight, so I just want to apologize," he started off, not waiting for an answer any more. "It's not my intention to come off pushy or demanding towards you. When it comes to others, I don't care how I act towards them. Majority of them deserve it to be honest."
"As you know, I spent my entire life being shut out and left alone. My parents not around and all of that sad bullshit. I struggled with identity and I still do to this day. I'm trying to find my actual self and by doing that I may act a certain way. In no way am I trying to be someone that I'm not. I don't know who I am actually and I'm still trying to figure that out day by day. So, yeah, I may come off hostile and an asshole in terms of my actions and words."
"Sometimes it is my intention to do so. An example is the basketball situation. I had to be mean and disrespectful because I was getting that energy, and I feed off energy. To a certain extent. When it comes to you though, it's a different story for many reasons. I never had a girlfriend before. I never cared a lot about a person the way I care about you. I never experienced this strong feeling either. You're literally my first everything, so I feel the need to be myself but also someone else. Just a little."
"And that's only because I'm not exactly sure which Shai to give you, personality wise. I'm an overall nice individual, but can be an ass when I feel the need to be one. I just recently found out that I can be a little on the sexual side too which is completely new to me. Which is why I asked if I've been pushy towards you lately. As a newly sexually active person who never done anything before, I felt in my heart that I may have been pushing you past your comfortability level recently."
"What happened yesterday only confirmed that for me. I'm extremely sorry if it felt like I was forcing you to do something that you weren't ready for. Shit, I'm not even ready to be honest but I assumed that being sexual is the new wave nowadays and didn't want to fall behind. As I'm saying this aloud, I realize how stupid that shit sounds. I don't follow trends. I don't even have social media anymore since I was sick of seeing the same style and same think pieces made by folks." He started to get off track as he continued speaking.
He shook his head, his hair moving all over the place. "Back to what I was saying, I'm sorry," he apologized again.
He was now facing her again and felt the need to repeat himself once more for the sake of it. "I apologize for the way I've been acting towards you. It is not my intention. I care a lot about you and have some VERY strong feelings for you as well. This is all still new to me, as much as it is for you, and I want to be able to do things right. So, again sorry." He concluded with yet another apology. He could give her a few more if she wanted them.
Dess snickered, covering her mouth almost immediately. This wasn't a laughing matter, however, she found herself giggling a little at him. Overthinking Shai was her favorite.
"Okay, sorry," she apologized for her laughing. She took a deep breath and calmed herself down. "Anyway, I accept your apology. You didn't even let me answer and just went right in."
"I know. I already had a feeling that I was anyway. Your silence was long too." He said.
"Right. Well, to answer your question, you have been a little hostile lately. Under the circumstances, I can understand why and I'm not coming at you for that. You have to adapt to a new scenery and I applaud you for being able to stick up for yourself. With that being said, last night had nothing to do with you. It was mainly me and thinking to myself that I was really growing up. For Christ sake, I was getting head for the first time and that caught me off guard. Regardless, I'm fine," she clarified, giving him a thumbs up.
"I'm also on my period, so there's the reason behind the emotions too," she added. Her thumbs up soon turned upside down. She waited for a typical Shai response that usually followed after every statement she made.
Shai squinted his eyes at her, Dess putting her hand down. A smile showed on his face seconds later then faded.
"What?" Dess chuckled at his weird expression.
"I was about to say something out of pocket, but I'll keep it to myself," he replied and turned away from her and went back to eating. His fries starting to get cold but he refused to not eat them. He wasn't going to waste money. Ironic.
Dess furrowed her brows while looking at him still. She curiously wondered what he was going to say and came up with blanks at first. Once she thought back to the conversation they were having, she caught on instantly.
"Oh my God, Shai!" She gasped loudly then hit his shoulder. Shai started laughing, keeping his comments and thoughts to himself while he continuing to eat.
"You're disgusting," Dess continued hitting him again.
"I didn't even say anything," Shai innocently said. His laughing did him no justice as thoughts continued flooding his brain. Why it went straight to that? He wasn't sure but that was the landing spot.
"But I know what you're thinking and that's nasty. Have some respect for yourself," she cringed at the thought. Shai still thought it was funny. Letting out small snickers here or there as he continued thinking about it.
"I do have respect for myself. I just like to get a little disrespectful sometimes," he added with a small shrug. Dess hit his shoulder again, making him chuckle. He was being so serious too.
"You know I'm being deadass right?" He asked for assurance.
"Oh I know and your dirty."
"Don't knock it 'til you try it."
🏀
"You don't even know the issue!"
"It's still a serious matter!"
"It's college! Shit happens!"
"Our daughter is attending that college! Do you not fear for her safety?"
"She shouldn't be going anywhere else besides her room and class, so no I don't!"
"She's a teenager, so she's going to go to parties!"
"I don't care!"
"You need to care if there's a rapist walking around the school! It's not safe-"
"Hampton is the safest campus out here! Stop your ridiculous whining woman!"
Ashley got off her bed and shut her bedroom door. With her parents arguing drowned out, she went to her desk and took a seat. Opening her laptop, her screen was already on Twitter. She refreshed her feed and saw twenty notifications. She hit the button to see a whole bunch of mentions, quote tweets, retweets, and likes. All coming from her tweet she made on Christmas Day.
A lot of folks were in support of her, reposting and spreading the word. Those were just random Twitter people. There was still a great amount that came at her and called her a liar. People she attended school with. They called her a hoe, whore, clout chaser, and so for. She wasn't sure what clout she was chasing after because none of these dudes were popular. Playing football didn't make you any better than anyone else.
The tweet eventually made it to both schools and that only caused more drama. All eyes were on her when she walked Hampton University campus. People whispered to their friends, some gave her a nasty look. Women sent the stank face her way, dudes pretending to hump the air and asking if they could get a round. She walked with her head lowered, embarrassed and ashamed. She thought doing something bold like posting it on social media would help her out, but it only made things worse.
Taking a deep breath, she dragged her mouse to the three dots on her post. She clicked on it, pulling up the options. What she wanted was the first option on top in red lettering, delete post. She swallowed hard then pressed it. A small confirmation box showed up asking if she was sure. She pressed the red lettering again to seal the deal. Seconds later, the post was down. Never to be seen again by anyone.
Disappointed in herself, she shut her laptop then got up from her desk. She approached her closet and dig deep in the back of it. She pulled out a trash bag and carried it to her bed. Dumping it out, clothes from that night spread out on her bed. She stared at them and instantly got thoughts of what happened. Her screaming and kicking. Begging to stop, the boys laughters and slight discourse over who was going first.
She remembered the order well.
First was Brian Abbott. The same dude that was amongst others that cornered her in the mall that one time. He attended Norfolk University. Played on the football and baseball team. A junior and a frat brother.
Then it went to Edward Griffin. A senior at Hampton. Football player with a 3.6 GPA. A girlfriend that was a majorette dancer. He was also Mister Senior, vice president of the Brother to Brother organization, and apart of the student union board. All around active on campus, so his face was everywhere.
Last but certainly not least, was Theo Morrison. He was also a student at Hampton, a senior and member of Brother to Brother organization. A frat brother and football player. As well as the great-nephew of the president of the school. The son of two Hampton alumni also.
All three boys heavily active at their schools and well known. Everyone knew them by name. They had many friends. Girls throwing themselves at them every second of the day. Which is why many people didn't believe anything Ashley was saying. Even some of the women were defending the boys. Though the support online were manly from randoms, it was a small percentage of folks in her school community. She was over it though.
There was no point anymore.
Just as she was about to pack all the those back into the trash bag, the door to her bedroom opened.
"Sweetheart, I was wondering-" Kim sentence ended when her eyes landed right on the clothes. She noticed the blood stains on her shirts and grew concerned.
"Ashley!" She called her name, entering the room further and approached the bed. Her hand reached out to touch the clothes, but Ashley blocked her hand.
"Please don't," Ashley told him in a soft tone. Kim look up at her, her eyes were now glossy as she stared at her daughter.
For the first time, she was able to see the strong resemblance between the two of them. Both of their eyes a shade of light brown. Their skin both a smooth brownish color. The same round face structure perfect for pictures. Long, natural eyelashes that matched up with their almond shaped eyes. Their snub nose that made it practically impossible for glasses to sit up.
The only difference was their hair. Ashley hair was naturally straightened to her shoulders, taking after her grandmother. Kim with kinky hair that didn't go past her ears. Regardless of the hair type, Ashley was her daughter. And Kim realized that her daughter was the girl everyone was talking about.
"Ladybug...why didn't you tell say something?" Kim asked. She looked down at the bloody clothes and instantly remembered seeing Ashley wearing them.
Ashley mentioned going to a party with a few friends. She stopped by the house first to get help from Kim on her hair. The mother and daughter were in the bathroom for a good thirty minutes arguing on what to do with it. Ashley wanted simple and Kim wanted to be extra. She never got the opportunity to go to college or attend a college party, so she lived through Ashley a little bit. Kim remembered slicking Ashley hair back into a ponytail, curling the ends to add an extra effect.
Kim even looked over Ashley's outfit which was pretty basic. A pair of dark blue ripped jeans and a plain black tube top. She thought her daughter looked pretty and was going to go have fun. She didn't think her child would wind up hurt in such a revolting manner. And to think that everyone, including her husband, was talking bad about the young lady only made the issue worse. Kim wanted to cry, but she saw Ashley's eyes starting to water and decided to keep her composure. Her heart was breaking the more she stared at her own flesh and blood, and thought of her being hurt.
Though Ashley may have put up a tough front and wasn't too fond of Kim's playfulness, she was still in need of her mother. She was quiet and unique in her own way. Avid reader, talented singer, and future social worker. She cared about people, said her opinions even if not wanted, and was determined to be something in life. Overly complicated and misunderstood at the same time
A little girl.
"Baby," Kim reached her hand forward to touch Ashley face. She noticed her flinch and hesitated to continue. But in this time of need, she had to let Ashley know she was here.
Ashley slowly shut her eyes once she felt her mothers soft hand caressing her cheek. She felt that sense of comfort that she's been longing for for some years now. Her father was too militaristic and hostile. Her mother had her so young, she was usually trying to be her best friend. Right now, Kim was being a mother. That's what Ashley wanted and needed.
"Aww, ladybug," Kim cooed, grabbing Ashley hand and pulling her close. She wrapped her arms around her and Ashley broke down almost instantly.
"We're going to make this right," Kim whispered, placing a kiss on her head. A few tears cascade down her cheeks as well while Ashley cried in her arms.
"I'm sorry, mommy. I'm so sorry."
No parent really knew their kid.
No one knew her at all.
🏀
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