Jude tried to stand still while Lena took all his measurements at the department store. She read off some numbers to him and he started looking at pants while she measured Connor. She gave him his numbers and he joined Jude browsing the selection. "Gym day tomorrow," Connor said to Jude. "My dad will be back this afternoon, you still want to come with us? It's leg day."
Jude nodded at him. "Yeah. I gotta start somewhere, right?"
Connor tilted his head at him. "You don't have to do this for me. You know that, right?"
"Yeah, I know. I want to. Besides, it would be nice to get to know your dad a little better, especially since we, y'know, didn't start out great."
Connor nodded at him. Both he and Jude picked out some pants and shorts. Connor winked at him. "Maybe I should get a speedo. Would you like to see me in that?"
Jude raised his eyebrows. "Yeah, or maybe just not wearing anything."
Connor smiled. "Thinking about that shower we took together?"
Jude pursed his lips. "More like that waking up thing where I was having my way with you."
Connor grinned slyly. "Well if you want to continue where we left off, let me know."
Jude winked at him. "I definitely will. And that speedo idea is still a pretty good one."
***
"Where's Connor?" Taylor asked Jude on FaceTime.
"Oh, his dad's back in town and picked him up. They were gonna run some errands. I'm going with them to the gym tomorrow."
She nodded. "Thanks for sending those additional Ronnoc details. I'll definitely need them. It's still okay if I come to you with questions, right?"
"Sure, anytime." He gave her a concerned look. "Uhhh, do you need money or anything for it? I know you were treating us last time but it seems like this could get expensive."
She grinned tightly at him. "Black budgets are a national secret buddy. Don't worry, I'm on it. I decided to get a patron for this one, and I think I've secured one. You'll probably be very surprised when you learn who it is."
Jude regarded her quizzically. "Someone's going to fund you on this? Why?"
"Maybe they just want to," she said. "Or maybe they feel like they want to make up for something."
Jude bit his lip. Who could she be referring to? "Like I said, the less I know the better, probably."
She nodded. "Don't worry about it then. You feeling okay about all the Robert stuff?"
He thought about it. "Yeah, yeah I am. I was wondering if you would do something though. Can you send over all the stuff you got on Mr. Getty and his business? I just want to look it over. I feel like we've missed something."
"Or maybe you don't want to think that Robert is or could be guilty?"
He gave a side nod. "Or maybe that too. Oh hey-I'm gonna ask Stef if she can teach me to shoot."
"Why? Not planning on having Connor be abducted again, are you?"
"No, I just think it's cool that you and Sophia know how and I want to try it."
"You probably won't like it, Jude. It's a pretty violent thing and that isn't you."
"Maybe you're right. I just want to try it."
"Okay. I just can't picture you shooting anything except a paper target. Maybe not even that."
He smiled at her. "You know me pretty well."
She thought about that. "I guess we'll find out. Peace out, buddy."
***
Stef and Lena had come back from the market and Jude was helping them put the groceries away. "I need to ask you something," he said to Stef. "I want to learn how to shoot a gun. Will you take me to the range sometime?"
Lena put her hands down on the table. "Now why do you want to do that?"
Jude shrugged. "Taylor and Sophia both shoot, and it's a dangerous world out there. If I ever have to be on my own I want to feel safe and not be scared."
"A kid your age isn't going to go around packing a gun," Stef said. "Besides, guns are not a solution to a problem, whether it's wanting to be safe or anything else."
"I know, I just want to know how to use one, if I ever had to."
Stef squeezed his shoulder. "Does this have something to do with Robert and the arrest? You don't think Callie was ever in danger over there, do you?"
He shook his head. "No, I just want to be prepared."
"I see." Stef looked at Lena. "Well let me discuss this with momma 'cuz I see she has some concerns. We'll let you know, okay?"
"Okay," he looked up at her and nodded.
"And are you good with this Connor and Miguel thing?"
Jude's brow furrowed. "Umm. I-"
"It's just I can see how you might be a little conflicted about Connor going to see him at the detention center today. You feeling all right with it?"
He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times. "I guess so. Adam told you?"
"Yeah," she slung the orange juice into the fridge.
Jude nodded. "Well, I'm gonna go up to my room, there's some stuff I should clean up."
Stef smiled at him. "Thanks for helping with the groceries, love."
***
Jude walked into his room and closed the door. He felt all his muscles tighten up and he started shaking. Angry tears filled his eyes. He got his phone out and wanted to text Connor but his fingers were in such knots he couldn't. He threw the phone at his bed, it cartwheeled into the covers and sat facing him, its black screen dark against the sheets. He marched to his bed and set the phone down on his nightstand. He was about to sink into bed and hold his pillow when residual pheromones hit him like a brick wall. He jumped back, his nostrils flaring angrily, tears spilling down his cheeks.
He pulled the blankets and sheets off his bed and ripped the pillowcases from the pillows. He carried them downstairs and stuffed them into the washer and started it. Then he went back up to his room. He sat down in the soft chair where he liked to read and wiped his face with his hands. He picked up the laptop and noticed it was synching his Dropbox, Taylor had sent the files he asked for. He started opening them and reading, trying to slow down his breathing.
Half an hour later, he went down and put his sheets in the dryer. He returned to his room, stuffed the laptop in his backpack and put his phone in his pocket. He was headed back downstairs with the pack when his phone buzzed in his pocket.
It was a message from Connor. On my way! Dad will drop me off in five. Jude rolled his eyes and jammed the phone back into his pocket. He went outside and around to the garage, got his bike out, and parked it in the driveway. Then he went and stood on the porch and waited. A few minutes later, Mr. Stevens pulled up and waved to Jude. Jude waved back, and Connor got out of the passenger side. He jogged up the walk. "Hey cakes! Did you..." his voice trailed off as he saw the look on Jude's face. "What's wrong?"
"How could you?" Jude demanded. "What reaction did you think I was going to have? 'Cuz I can tell you it wasn't going to be like this one."
The look on Connor's face was unlike any Jude had ever seen but one...the surprised and terrified look Connor had when he was shot and tumbling to the ground, mortally wounded, blood squirting and spinning in slow motion through the dark, heavy air....
Connor seemed like he was suddenly unable to breathe. "Cakes, it's not like that...he asked if I would come see him, and the way everything has been I-"
"You know," Jude interrupted. "I am so fucking sick of everyone trying to protect me from whatever they think I shouldn't know about. And you're the last person I should ever get that from."
"I'm really sorry Jude, I-" Connor's eyes were flooding with tears. He moved towards Jude.
Jude pushed him away. "DON'T TOUCH ME!" he ran to his bike and got on, flew down the driveway onto the street.
"Jude!" Connor called after him. "JUUUUDE!"
***
Callie got home from the diner and let herself in the door. Sighing tiredly, she was about to go upstairs when she heard what sounded like someone crying. She walked to the laundry room, Connor was sitting cross-legged on the floor, a pile of sheets in his arms. He was sobbing into them, his body shaking uncontrollably. Callie dropped beside him and wrapped her arm around him. "Connor! What's wrong?"
He looked up at her, his eyes raw and red from crying. Still wracked by sobs, he could barely get words out, and each one was followed by more sobs. "He...washed...his...sheets." He dropped his head, continuing to bawl.