Jude was asleep but his eyes were moving under closed eyelids, deep in dreams. He and Connor were running as fast as they could, in a high mountain meadow full of grass and wildflowers. Like the day in the backyard, Connor was chasing him, and like then, Jude actually wanted to be caught. Connor tackled him softly and they tumbled into the grass, the earthy smell of it rushing into Jude's nostrils, accented with the sweet smell of the flowers. He fell into Connor's arms, and Connor was kissing him and holding his hands down onto the grass. The warm sun was bright overhead in the blue sky, a faint breeze was blowing, and Jude felt like all of his atoms were in fusion with Connor's. In science class they had learned that all the life on Earth was supernova remnant, the ashes of stars. All those atoms were now remembering where they had come from, shining and burning and bursting with light. Connor was the one person in the world who knew him better than anyone else, his best friend, his boyfriend. Whatever happened, now, tomorrow, the future, Jude knew he would carry Connor within him forever.
Blearily, he opened his eyes, to see Connor watching him. "Morning." He looked into Connor's eyes. "Were you watching me sleep?" He smiled.
"Watching you dream, and it was frickin' amazing. What were you dreaming about?"
Jude blinked, and held Connor's hand. "That you were my soulmate." Connor's eyes were enormous pools of emotion. Who was it, who called them windows to the soul?
Connor kissed his forehead, his nose, his mouth. "Am I really?"
Jude nodded. "You were the first real friend I ever had," he said. "You believed in me when no-one else did, when no-one else cared. I'm never going to forget that."
Connor's eyes filled with tears. Jude held him, not speaking, not doing anything, and yet living with more purpose than he had ever felt in his life.
***
"Last Chance Dance tomorrow," Connor said with a sly smile. "Be my date?"
Jude grinned. "Sure. I can handle having the hottest date in school."
"Oh can you? Handle it?" Connor grabbed his butt.
"Stop it," Jude giggled.
Connor kissed his cheek. "See you after school."
***
Lena kissed Jude's forehead. "You're looking very happy these days, buddy. Things going great with Connor?"
"He asked me to the Last Chance Dance tomorrow." He sat down at the kitchen table, and she sat down next to him. "When you fell in love with Stef, was it different from falling in love with anyone else?"
She tilted her head at him. "What do you mean honey?"
He gave her a little smile. "I just don't think there's anyone who'll ever be like Connor."
She giggled. "Honey, Connor is your first love. He's always going to have a special place in your heart, even if you end up with someone else."
He thought about that. "I can't imagine someone else right now. Do you think it's true, that there is someone you're destined to be with? Like you and Stef?"
She pondered that for a long moment. "Adult love can be a bit more complicated that that, sweetie. There are a million things trying to keep Stef and I apart, and it's only by the sheer force of love that we resist all of them and stay together. You and Connor don't really have to worry about that yet."
He nodded. "I hear what you're saying Mom, I do. But he's the one I'm really supposed to be with. I've never been more sure of anything in my life."
She smiled broadly. "That's an awfully mature thing to say, my little Buddha. You always amaze me, and I'm so happy you're our son."
He smiled. "It took awhile, but I found the moms I was always meant to have. And I feel the same way about Connor, Mom. I could go to the end of the universe and to the end of time and I wouldn't get a different answer. He and I are as meant to be together as I am meant to be your boy. I thought I got lucky the first time, getting you and Stef as moms. But with Connor, I mean, what are the odds that you'd end up right where you're supposed to be, not once, but twice?"
***
Connor poked him. "You seem really serious today. Everything okay?"
"I was just talking to Lena about what I told you this morning."
"The soulmate thing? You really meant that, didn't you?"
"Yeah. It made me realize something, babe. You're the one I'm meant to be with. Not just now, but always."
"Nice of you to figure out something I knew from the beginning. And you said I was the dense one."
Jude laughed. "Kiss me?"
Connor kissed him. "Can't get enough of it."
"Love me?"
"Forever and day or two after that, maybe more?"
Jude kissed him. "I have a confession, I don't really know how to dance. I'm gonna suck, just like I do at all the stuff you want to do with me."
Connor laughed. "I'm wild about that, you know, your adorable sucky ways."
Jude play-smacked him. "Seriously though, maybe Mariana can teach me some moves."
"Yeah, or maybe we could practice...on our own?" He got his phone out and found a song on his playlist. He got up, pulling Jude after him.
"This is a slow dance song," Jude protested.
"There will be slow dance songs." Connor cradled and rocked him.
"Not all of them."
"Can you blame me for wanting to practice the best parts first?"
Jude grinned. "I guess not. Are my hands in the right place? Or should they be here?" he slid them down over Connor's butt.
"There you go pervin' again."
Jude laughed and moved his hands up Connor's back. "As I recall that was your move, and at school!"
Connor tipped him backwards and kissed him.
***
When Adam walked in the door he saw Connor playing video games on the TV. "Oh, you're home?"
Connor laughed. "I know it doesn't seem like it, but I do live here, remember?"
Adam smiled. "And why exactly are you not at the Fosters tonight?"
"Oh, Jude's family is meeting with their lawyer tonight, just finalizing stuff for Callie's adoption."
Adam nodded. "Did you have some dinner?"
"Yeah, made mac & cheese. How was your board meeting?"
"Great, we're starting a new suicide prevention initiative for the summer and we're getting the campaign put together. It looks great, hopefully it's gonna help and save a lot of kids."
Connor gave him an admiring look.
"Everything good with you and Jude? Anything you want to talk about?"
"Nah, it's going really well. We're going to the Last Chance Dance tomorrow. Oh! I almost forgot, Lena wanted me to ask if you can help chaperone the 7th graders."
"Sure, when is it?"
"6:30."
"You do your homework?"
"Didn't have any, took last tests today and we're just doing yearbooks the next two days. Can't believe the school year's over with already."
***
Connor turned down the covers of his bed, thinking of how unfamiliar his own bed seemed now that he was spending so many nights over at Jude's. He slipped into bed, feeling cold and alone. He grabbed his phone. God this sucks.
A moment later. I know. Im hating it too.
Connor bit his lip, then threw his covers off and went downstairs. His dad was at his laptop, talking on his cell phone.
"Can you hold a moment Lisa?" Adam looked at Connor. "What's up?"
***
Jude lay in bed. Something inside him was aching, an emptiness like hunger, but one that felt like it couldn't be filled. He felt it most intensely in his back, where he would be in contact with Connor. He laid flat with his hands behind his head, wondering how to work this out because he wasn't going to be able to spend every night with Connor. They hadn't even spent that many nights together and yet Jude already felt miserable without him for even one night.
His door opened and Jude sat up, his eyes blinking in the sudden light. In the doorway in pajamas stood Connor, his eyes luminous, his smile beaming. Jude rushed upon him like a whirlwind, pulled him to the bed, tumbled into it with him, laughing, crying and whispering all at once. He kissed Connor. "Did you sneak out?"
"Nah, dad brought me over. He has to work on his director stuff anyway."
"I'm really glad you're here. The thought of sleeping alone was unbearable." He nestled his back into Connor's chest. "What do you think about, when you hold me like this?"
"It's like, I don't know." He paused. "Like holding a little bird in your hand, wanting to be gentle and protective, and yet filled with wonder at what I'm holding." His hand interlocked with Jude's. "Wanna dream of me some more?"
"Yeah, now that I'll be able to sleep." Jude closed his eyes, felt his breathing join the rhythm of Connor's breathing. He slept. And dreamed.
***
"Mariana did teach you some moves," Connor said with obvious admiration.
"Yeah, she gave me a lesson for like, three hours," Jude said. "She's so amazing. Different from Callie, for sure, but I'm really glad she's my sister."
The song ended, and a slow song started. "I guess this is the part you've been waiting for," Jude said. "Or did you bribe them?"
"Hahaha," Connor said, bringing him into an embrace. He looked at his dad watching from the sidelines.
Lena walked up to Adam. "Everything fine? You feeling okay about this?"
He smiled. "I'm definitely seeing it in a different light. And I wanted to thank you, again. Without your persistence and support, this never would have happened."
"Well, you're doing a lot of good with the LGBT Council, I'm impressed."
He nodded. "The goal is a safe environment for every LGBT kid. Which is not something I could have conceived I would be working on, even a few months ago."
"Nor I," Lena said, and laughed. And she watched Jude, nestled into Connor, swaying together like a tree in the wind.
***
"Now it's time for the 7th grade royalty," Principal Porter announced. "And this is a twist, we have a King and King, Connor Stevens and Jude Adams Foster! Come on up, boys."
Holding hands and smiling bashfully, Jude and Connor went up to get crowned. Connor kissed Jude, and the crowd cheered.
***
"Today was great," Connor enthused.
Jude nodded. "And you kissed me, in front of the whole school. Funny how you used to think that sort of thing was just for tents and dark theaters."
Connor laughed. "Would you quit stalling and get ready for bed? I need my spoon!"
"Oh, so you think you can be all demanding now, do you?" Jude winked at him and went in to brush his teeth.