As I look from face to terrifying face, my eyes settle on the pretty lady. She's the only one that looks like she cares.
Tate is looking at no one as he stares at his clasped hands, and I can't decide if he's scared or angry...He looks so mad.
Pretty lady clears her throat, and Tate continues to look at his hands. "My name is Molly, and I work for DCFS. Do you guys know what that is?"
Tate looks up for the first time and his eyes darken. "We're not 5. Quit beating around the bush and say what you came to say."
Molly nods as she thrums her fingers against a thick manila envelope.
"That's fair... I'm so sorry you two, but yesterday your dad was killed."
After a moment of silence, I wait for the sadness to hit.
It doesn't
"How?" Tate asks, not sounding upset either.
"It would be better if....."
"WHAT DID I JUST SAY ABOUT NOT TREATING US LIKE WE'RE KIDS!" He screams.
Molly doesn't even flinch as she looks at him and nods.
"Your dad was involved in some illegal business, and he made the wrong people angry. He was murdered, and the investigation is ongoing."
As we both let that sink in, the Dean clears his throat. "Is there anything we can do for you two?"
"Like what? Bring him back to life?" Tate snaps, causing the Dean to look at his desk uncomfortably.
"We have been working all night on arrangements for the two of you. Your brother is the only living relative you have, and he has agreed to take you."
Tate's hands clench into fists as he looks up at Molly. "Holden is coming to live here?"
"Uh, no. Since the investigation is ongoing, we have no way of knowing if the two of you are in danger. We will be relocating you to his home in Florida."
Tate looks at me with a fake smile. "He lives in Florida, Jules....."
I didn't even know Holden was still alive. We haven't heard from him in years.
"We have to move?" I ask, speaking for the first time. My voice doesn't sound normal, and I think Tate notices too. He simply takes my hand in his and gives it a gentle squeeze, glaring at Molly.
This is the first time he's ever truly acknowledged me at school, aside from just a few minutes ago in the waiting area.
"I'm sure this is scary Julianne, and also extremely overwhelming. We all feel that removing you and Tate from California and placing you with your brother in Florida will be the safest."
"When?" I whisper.
Molly gives me a sad smile and clears her throat. "You will be on a flight at noon."
"Today?!?!" Tate gasps as he lets go of my hand and sits straight, looking like he's about ready to punch her.
Molly simply nods as she brushes some blonde hair out of her face as she watches Tate carefully. I see the officers stiffen as they watch him too..
"I have a surfing competition to go to tomorrow! And friends...And a damn life that I'm not ready to leave. How the hell can you waltz in here in a tiny pair of pants that are too tight for your ass, and tell us our whole lives have changed...So you put us on a plane and go home to sip on vodka, congratulating yourself on another job well done?"
"Tate, I understa—..."
"You don't understand shit! I'm not leaving!"
She clears her throat and goes to take his hand when he flinches away. "I swear if you touch me, you're gonna need more than these two 'Andy Griffith' cops to stop me from killing you!"
"Ok, why don't we all take a deep breath and ca-..." The Dean starts.
"I swear if you were just trying to tell me to calm down....." Tate growls.
Molly nods and looks at me. "Holden will be at the airport to pick you guys up once you land. If we leave now, we will have time to go to your home and pack."
I blow out a breath. I can't believe this! I've dreamt about seeing Holden for years...But it's been what? Five years since I've seen him?...I don't really remember him all that great.
Tate puts his head on his hand with his elbow on the arm rest. When I touch his knee, he looks at me with an unreadable expression.
"Please? I want to have time to pack my things," I whisper.
Tate blows out a big breath and shakes his head. "Wait, hold up....You say he's dead, but how do we believe you? For all we know, you're here to kidnap us and hold us for ransom."
Molly nods, unshaken by Tate. "If that were the case, I wouldn't have gotten your Dean involved or these two officers. Your dad is dead, Tate. I'm so incredibly sorry."
"Tate, please?" I beg, and for a split second I see terror flash across his face before he looks angry again.
He blows out a breath and stands up, looking at me and motioning for me to walk out with him. When we get outside, our limo is there waiting for us.
That's when it sets in for Tate, I think. He slumps his shoulders slightly and looks as defeated as I feel: If the staff knows, then it's true.
Our lives have forever changed
~*~
Going into our house somehow feels different than it did just two hours ago when we left. Emptier and sadder. Cook and Maria watch us sadly with tears in their eyes. Whether or not it's because they will be unemployed after today, or because they will miss us...I'm not sure.
When I get to my room, tears spill from my eyes. These four walls have been so lonely for me, yet they've been my only solitude I've ever had. The one place in this world that I can escape to and hide from the judgements and ridicule of others, is here.
It was my sanctuary, yet my hell. Staring at these four walls and yearning for them to be able to make me happy is the pathetic truth.
I'm not getting enough time to say goodbye. Hell, I didn't even sleep in my room last night. How could everything change? This morning everything was exactly the same.
I hear my door open, and I turn expecting to see Tate.
It's Cook, his usual bubbly and quirky self is now sad and serious.
"May I help you pack, Miss Julianne?"
At my nod, he comes in and goes into my huge walk-in closet, bringing several pieces of luggage with him.
"Can I bring all of that?" I ask, already panicking over what I want to take the most.
He shrugs as he opens the biggest one first.
"I think if a young lady's world gets flipped upside down, she should be allowed to bring an extra suitcase or two. Besides clothes, what treasures are top priority?"
I look around my room and shrug. How does a person decide that so quickly? How do I leave half of what I own behind?
He walks around my room slowly, his aging body not standing as straight as it once did. When he stops at my bed, his eyes focus on kitty—The one thing I've had since I was a baby that could make everything okay with a squeeze.
When he holds the tattered used-to-be white stuffed animal, he grins slightly as he sniffs to keep his tears in.
"When you was a teeny runt, you used to show me the green eyes. They captivated ya. Look at the little scratches on the marbles, Miss Julianne! You used to pick at them so much, I'd tell you to give the poor cat a break before ya made him blind."
I smile at him and nod. Kitty has basically been my only friend for my entire life.
He places it gently in the suitcase and continues to look around my room. "This is a must too, Miss Julianne."
I turn to see what he is talking about, and grin when I see a dainty cupcake necklace I won at a carnival when I was 8. I was so completely proud of myself for hitting the bullseye, and I didn't take it off for months and months. Maria told me that my skin would start growing around it if I didn't take it off once in a while.
As Cook and I spend quite a while picking out my favorite things and making every inch of each suitcase count, I'm finally ok with what I decided to leave.
Nothing I'm leaving behind is breaking my heart, surprisingly.
As I start to leave my room, Cook grabs my hand.
"You probably don't know this, Miss Julianne...But you hold a right special place in my heart. I'm gonna miss ya somethin' fierce. I need ya to promise me somethin'."
At my nod, tears fill his dark eyes and he squeezes my hand. "Yur somebody special and I want ya to start realizin' it. The moment you know you matter is the moment you can take the world by storm. This world is needin' the light of Julianne Thompson so desperately."
"I-I've known you all my life and I don't even know your real name, Cook. What is it?"
He gives me a watery grin and lets out a breath. "It's Reginald Watson, Miss Julianne... But my friends know me as Reggie."
He takes two of my suitcases and I take the third, and Tate and Molly are already waiting for me by the door.
"Why the hell do you have so much? I didn't know we could take more than one!" Tate scoffs
Cook hands the luggage to the chauffeur and turns to Tate. "A lady needs more than a lad, Mister Tate."
"Ready to go, Julianne?" Molly asks me softly.
Before I agree I shake my head and take one of the suitcases away from the chauffeur, opening it carefully so everything doesn't get messed up. I take out Kitty and hand it to Cook.
"Miss Julianne?"
"I think you're the only real friend I've ever had, Reggie..And I didn't realize that until just now. Keep Kitty safe until we see each other again."
A sob wracks deep in his chest as he tries to breathe through his nose to keep it inside. He can't stop the tears from leaking down his dark face as he pulls me against him and kisses my cheek.
"I'll take real good care of him. You've been my friend since the day you was born, and you never let NOBODY keep you from realizin' who you are."
I go to nod, but I can't. I have no idea what he's talking about.
When he pulls away he looks at Tate hard. "I know ya love her, even though you act tough all the time. You start showin' her, ya hear me? Somethin' tells me ya need her just as fiercely as she needs you."
Tate doesn't nod or anything, but I see something flicker in his eyes as he grips his suitcase harder.
When Reggie kisses my forehead, I realize that this is the last time I'll ever see him again. The man who has been there for me just about every day, cooking me breakfast, lunch, and dinner. He was the person to listen when my days were bad, and he's forever going to be out of my life.
I wasn't prepared for such a hard goodbye.