A short headcanon featuring Mafia King Satoru and how he met his wife, Shotadori💖
Gojo Satoru/Itadori Yuuji
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Headcanon in which Satoru's men somehow manages to kidnap the cute, loving brother of Mafia God Ryoumen Sukuna, Yuuji, from his school and hand the shota over to their Boss.
Satoru and Sukuna have been having an ongoing beef since the two of them came into power. The two try to avoid each other, but their line of work makes that hard. When they clash, the men currently with them tend to die, leaving them with only their right hands. Sometimes they fight it out, trying to end each other, but both are strong in their own might and fail to do so everytime, only leaving the other with injuries and wounded prides.
In the world of the Mafia, it's not surprising that one or two subordinates tend to fuck up once in a while, which is the case Satoru's currently facing. Five of his men royally fucked up, costing him a shipment of drugs which the police has confiscated. The Mafia King is still deciding on what their real punishment will be, even after making them to each cut a finger and being dealt with by Suguru.
The five then have this stupid idea of kidnapping SUKUNA'S baby brother and giving the boy as a gift to Satoru.
Satoru just stares in shock at the small boy, who's blinking up at him in confusion with that bright, amber eyes of his. The King squeals internally at how cute he is, but outwardly he's furious.
These idiots literally brought war to his fucking doorsteps.
As expected, he unleashes his anger on them, shooting two dead in the head and incapacitating the others by shooting their legs. He commands that the three should be kept alive as they're being dragged away by some of Satoru's men. They would be his apology gift to Sukuna.
With a bright smile, even though he currently has a gun in his hand, Satoru squats down and greets Yuuji with a cheery voice. The boy returns the greeting, a flowery background appearing behind him as he does so
.
Satoru almost dies of nosebleed, making Suguru to give him a disgusted look.
The white haired man hands the gun over to Suguru before picking up the cute eight year old. He makes light conversation with the kid, who happily replies the questions Satoru asks.
With Yuuji in his arm, Satoru dials Sukuna's number. Of course, the Mafia God answers with rage, a snarl passing through his lips. When Satoru cheerfully tells him that Yuuji's with him, the boy greeting his elder brother cheerfully, Sukuna's growl of rage is deep and frightening. Even Satoru feels a small shiver of fear crawl down his spine.
It doesn't take Sukuna thirty minutes to get to Satoru's estate, and Suguru is there to meet him. He leads the scowling and pissed off God to the main lobby, who has a calm looking Uraume following behind him.
They're met with the sight of Yuuji in the lap of Satoru, who's showing the boy something on his phone.
"Oi." Sukuna's deep voice rings out loud, drawing their attention to him.
"Suku nii!" Yuuji squeals out, jumping off from Satoru's lap - making the man to pout - and running over to Sukuna. He dives at his brother, who effortlessly catches him immediately. He wraps his arms around Sukuna's neck, babbling to his brother about his day, especially about the kidnapping and Satoru's reaction to it.
Once Yuuji has finished with his tale, Sukuna regards Satoru with a harsh glare. "Is this true?"
"Yep~" Satoru, who has a hand in his pocket, replies with a grin. "Those idiots acted on their own, thinking it will make me less mad of their fuckup."
"And where are they?"
"Two are dead - sorry about that, by the way - and the other three are incapacitated. Should I deliver them to you or do you want to deal with them now?"
"Deliver them to me." Sukuna looks down at Yuuji's head, the boy currently resting his head on Sukuna's large chest. "The gaki here has been missing his practice for a while."
Yuuji raises his head and looks up at Sukuna with sparkly eyes. "I get to play with them?!"
"Hmm." He gives the child a smirk. "They did try to fuck with you, after all."
"Yay! I've got new pets!" Yuuji fist bumps, getting a grunt from Sukuna.
"Do try not to break them too soon, Gaki."
"Hmhmm! I'll play with the one at a time!" Yuuji grins at him.
Satoru blinks in astonishment, before chuckling in amusement. Of course. This is the Ryoumen family after all, so it shouldn't be surprising that even the angel of the house is a demon underneath. His brother IS Sukuna after all.
"Ne, Nii chan, can you please put me down?"
Sukuna grunts at the request, but Yuuji puppy eyes and pout makes him do as asked. He watches in displeasure as Yuuji runs over to Satoru and grabs his pants, tugging on it to grab to grab the white haired man's attention.
"Ne, Satoru san?"
"Yes, Yuu chan?~♡"
Sukuna's brow twitches at that nickname, his red eyes glaring at the white haired bastard.
"Become my husband."
Sukuna splutters in shock, Satoru chokes in surprise, while Uraume and Suguru gape in disbelief.
"Wha- what?!" Sukuna finally lets out, the question almost having a shriek like quality to it.
"I like you. You're fun as well as brutal. You'll make a good husband for me." The boy nods his head to his own assessment.
"Are- are you sure, Yuu chan?"
"Oi! What kind of question is that, Shitty Glasses?!"
"I'm kind of a mess to get such a cute wife as yourself~" Satoru laughs out nervously as he massages the back of his head.
"The fuck did you say?!"
"That's perfectly okay!" Yuuji grins up at him. "Youre like Suku nii. A mess but perfect. I like you like that!"
Satoru gives the boy a grin of his own, his heart constricting at the boy's words and butterflies fluttering in his stomach. With his mind made up, he goes on a knee, removes his ring with his insignia and holds it out to kid. "I accept."
"Oi!"
Yuuji giggles at him, outstretching his left hand to Satoru, who gently grabs it and wears the large ring on his ring finger. Yuuji giggles again, clutching his hand to his chest. With a smile, he places a soft kiss on Satoru's lips before skipping over to Sukuna. "Look, Nii chan! I've got a husband now!" He shows the wobbling ring to his brother, a bright blush on his cheeks.
Sukuna lets out a strangled grunt, giving his cute baby brother a strained smile, congratulating him. He asks Uraume to take Yuuji to the car and wait for him. He watches as his servant leads the child away with his soft hand in his, Yuuji happily skipping as they go.
Satoru suddenly finds Sukuna in his face, glaring at him. "I wish I killed you when I have the chance, Shitty Glasses." He said with a sneer.
Satoru, the troll, licks his lips, moaning at the taste of Yuuji's cherry flavour on them. "Tough luck~" He says with a smirk, his eyes shining with mirth above his glasses. "Now, we're going to be brother-in-laws. How poetic~"
Sukuna's brow twitches in irritation. With a resigned sigh, he says, "Prepare yourself, and cash, for the wedding soon. Knowing how impatient Yuuji is, he'd want the wedding to commence soon." And with that, he walks away, his coat billowing behind him.
"See you soon, Nii san~!" Satoru waves him goodbye, getting a middle finger from the departing man.
"Why do you love playing with fire?" Suguru asks with a deadpanned expression.
Satoru's reply to him is giving him a peace sign, his wide grin ever bright and cheeky.
And that was how Satoru scored himself a beautiful wife, who grew more beautiful as the days went by in their blissful marriage.
Too bad he couldn't knock Yuuji up. Their children would truly be beautiful.