What if I ain't no violinist?

By rin_rin40

33.3K 1.9K 1.8K

A collection of one-shot and short stories of parallel worlds about Twoset Violinists Brett and Eddy. What if... More

2. Twoset Chemistry
4. Twoset Hotline
8. Twoset Football Talent
9. Twoset Football Talent II
10. Twoset Football Talent III
11. Twoset Snowboarders
12. Twoset Snowboarders II
14. Author's note 20210109
15. Twoset Science
19. Twoset First Aiders
20. Twoset First Aiders II
21. Twoset Anthropologists
22. Twoset Anthropologists II
23. Twoset Mash-up Reunion!
24. Twoset Tutoring
27. Twoset Ultimate Questions
28. Twoset Blind Dating Musicians: Edwina Edition
29. Twoset Fan Girls
30. Twoset Skaters
31. Twoset Skaters II
1. Twoset MMA
32. Twoset MMA II
36. Swipe top right, swipe bottom right
6. Twoset Daddy
17. Twoset Daddy II
43. Twoset Daddy III
49. Twoset Accountants
50. Twoset Accountants II
54. Author's Note - the mathematics of fanfic
52. Twoset Geologists
53. Twoset Geologists II
55. Twoset Geologists III
33. Twoset Sky-divers
35. Twoset Sky-divers II
61. Twoset Twins
62. Twoset Twins II
63. Twoset Boyband
64. Twoset Boyband II
65. Twoset Boyband III
51. Twoset Dancers
71. Twoset Dancers II
66. Twoset Clairvoyants
67. Twoset Clairvoyants II
68. Twoset Fortune Teller
70. Twoset Fortune Teller II
69. Twoset Wizard
72. Twoset Wizard II
39. Twoset Pest Controllers
47. Twoset Pest Controllers II
76. Twoset Pest Controllers III
77. Twoset Teaser
82. You can see me?
83. Twoset Peas
88. Twoset Peas II
89. Twoset Peas III
92. Twoset Handbells
96. Twoset Cleaner
97. Twoset Cleaner II
99. Twoset Cleaner III
38. Twoset Singers
40. Twoset Singers II
46. Twoset Singers III
93. Twoset Singers IV
100. Twoset Singers V
105. Twoset Bartender
95. Twoset Window Cleaner
98. Twoset Window Cleaner II
106. Twoset Window Cleaner III
107. Twoset Window Cleaner IV
26. Twoset Grapefruit Boys
34. Twoset Grapefruit Boys II
48. Twoset Grapefruit Boys III
80. Twoset Grapefruit Boys IV
109. Twoset Grapefruit Boys V
108. Twoset Travellers
110. Twoset Travellers II
111. Twoset Travellers III
112. The Haircuts by Butcher
18. Twoset Firefighters
58. Twoset Zookeeper
75. Twoset Zookeeper II
94. Twoset Zookeeper III
116. Twoset Firefighters II & Zookeeper V Mashup
117. Twoset Firefighters III/Zookeeper VI Mashup II
118. Twoset Firefighters IV/Zookeeper VII Mashup III
119. Twoset Firefighters V/Zookeeper VIII Mashup IV
41. Twoset Competitors
42. Twoset Competitors II
44. Twoset Competitors III
120. Twoset Firefighters VI / Competitors IV Mashup
121. Twoset Firefighters VII / Competitors V Mashup II
122. Twoset Firefighters VIII / Competitors VI Mashup III
123. Twoset Firefighters IX / Competitors VII Mashup IV
124. Twoset Firefighters X / Competitors VIII Mashup V
125. Twoset Firefighters XI / Competitors IX Mashup VI
126. Twoset Firefighters XII / Competitors X Mashup VII
56. Twoset Daycare
57. Twoset Daycare II
59. Twoset Daycare III
60. Twoset Daycare IV
127. Twoset Pre-school
129. Twoset Pre-school II
130. Twoset Pre-school III
86. Twoset Dentist
131. Twoset Dentist II
132. Twoset Doctor and IT security engineer
133. Twoset Doctor and IT security engineer II
138. Twoset Kidneys
139. Twoset Oompa-Loompas (writing challenge)
140. Twoset Tweeter
142. Twoset Gen β
143. Twoset Gen β II
144. Twoset Gen β III
145. Twoset Gen β IV
3. Twoset Teachers
5. Twoset Teachers II
13. Twoset Teachers III
16. Twoset Teachers IV (Viola Vexation 1)
25. Twoset Teachers V (Viola Vexation 2)
37. Twoset Teachers VI
45. Twoset Teachers VII
85. Twoset Teachers VIII (Luscious Lashes 1)
91. Twoset Teachers IX (Luscious Lashes 2)
102. Twoset Teachers X (Paparazzi 1)
103. Twoset Teachers XI (Paparazzi 2)
104. Twoset Teachers XII
128. Twoset Teachers XIII (special episode - writing challenge)
141. Twoset Teachers XIV
148. Twoset Teachers XV
149. Twoset Removalists
150. Twoset Timetravellers
151. Twoset Inventor
154. Twoset Timetravellers II
7. Twoset Manga-ka
79. Twoset Manga-ka II
81. Twoset Manga-ka III
84. Twoset Manga-ka IV
101. Twoset Manga-ka V
152. Twoset Manga-ka VI
153. Twoset Manga-ka VII
156. Twoset Manga-ka VIII
157. Twoset Vampire
166. Twoset Hairdresser
167. Twoset Gen α
168. Twoset Artist
169. Twoset Bedtime Story
170. Twoset Bedtime Story II
171. Twoset Secrets
158. Twoset La Mort
159. Twoset Guardian
160. La Mort meets Guardian
161. La Mort meets Guardian II
162. La Mort meets Guardian III
163. La Mort meets Guardian IV
164. La Mort meets Guardian V
172. La Mort meets Guardian VI
179. The 4 levels of Twoset Violin-chan
73. Twoset Veterinarian
74. Twoset Veterinarian II
78. Twoset Veterinarian III
90. Twoset Veterinarian IV
134. Twoset Veterinarian V (Blink for benevolence 1)
135. Twoset Veterinarian VI (Blink for benevolence 2)
136. Twoset Veterinarian VII (Blink for benevolence 3)
137. Twoset Veterinarian VIII (Blink for benevolence 4)
146. Twoset Veterinarian IX (In the name of science 1)
147. Twoset Veterinarian X (In the name of science 2)
173. Twoset Veterinarian XI (Liszt's curse 1)
174. Twoset Veterinarian XII (Liszt's curse 2)
175. Twoset Veterinarian XIII (Liszt's curse 3)
176. Twoset Veterinarian XIV (Liszt's curse 4)
177. Twoset Veterinarian XV (Liszt's curse 5)
178. Twoset Veterinarian XVI (Liszt's curse 6)
180. Twoset Veterinarian XVII
182. The art class - injured
183. The art class II - portrait
184. Twoset Devil
185. Twoset Diary (Eddy's)
189. Twoset Sleeptalkers
190. Twoset Barista
191. Twoset Barista II
192. Twoset Barista III
193. Twoset Traceurs
194. Twoset Traceurs II
195. Twoset Traceurs III
196. Twoset Detectives
197. Twoset Detectives II
155. Twoset Psychic
186. Twoset Psychic II
187. Twoset Psychic III
188. Twoset Psychic IV
198. Twoset Psychic V
87. Twoset Searchers
113. Twoset Searcher II
114. Twoset Searcher III
165. Twoset Searcher IV
181. Twoset Searchers V
199. Twoset Searchers VI
200. Twoset Searchers VII

115. Twoset Zookeeper IV

112 10 12
By rin_rin40

Zookeeper Brett's boyfriend Eddy was a violinist, a concertmaster of an orchestra. Brett loved classical music too and he would often come along to listen to Eddy's orchestral performances. Brett loved the whole atmosphere. But as much as he loved watching and listening to Eddy play, Brett also equally loved it when they got to go and watch a performance together.

"Brett, you were staring at me all through the concert. You're meant to be looking at the stage y'know."

Brett shrugged.

"...Just how did you know I was staring at you when you're supposed to be looking at the stage?"

"I can tell."

"Well, you're not supposed to!"

"But I did.... So why?"

"I just like watching you fascinated by the music. It's more iNtErEsTiNg to watch you than the stage."

"...Well, where do you look when I'm actually performing then?"

"Oh, in that case I'd only be looking at you, of course."

Eddy blushed.

"So Brett, maybe next time I could come along and watch you in your element ?"

"What do you mean?"

"What animal do you normally look after? Now I know it's not the bloody alpaca."

Brett giggled.

"No, it's definitely not that the bloody alpaca. Though the girl who looks after him is actually a really nice person. Dunno how she puts up with him."

"OMG"

"So, did you want to guess my animal? I've got quite a few to look after but you might enjoy watching me look after this one in particular.... I've recently been assigned to them and they're gorgeous."

"Hmm. I have absolutely no idea."



"May I have a map please?"

"Certainly. Is there anywhere, in particular, you'd like to visit today?"

"Yes, I'd like to go see the meerkats..."

"Okay. So their enclosure is right over here..."

Since Brett gifted an annual pass to Eddy for the zoo where he worked, Eddy's been a regular visitor.  In all reality though, he would stroll in to meet up with Brett at the café but hadn't really had much of an opportunity to look around, not since the first zoo date they had shortly after they first met months and months ago.

Eddy strolled over to the meerkat enclosure. He vaguely remembered seeing them before on his zoo date with Brett.  When he peered over his waist height concrete wall of the enclosure and cast a shadow over one of them, it quickly scuttled away into a tree log. Eddy felt bad for scaring the little fella. A young boy, a toddler arrived with his mother. He was trotting along, then placed his hands on the wall in an attempt to peer in. The mother arrived a few steps later, pushing along an empty pram. She picked up the little boy to let him have a better look. The next instant Eddy heard the boy burst into tears. Eddy looked up at the mother and child to see what happened.

"He dropped his favourite red car..."

"Oh no. ...um.. let me call the zookeeper.."

Eddy got out his phone and dialled Brett.

"..Eddy? You're here now ?"

"Yeah. Um, I know I'm early but can you or someone come out here? A little boy dropped a toy in the enclosure."

"Oh yeah sure.."

"Look, I've got long arms, if I really tried I could probably reach..."

"Oh, no, no, no, no, no.. please, Eddy, I'll be there in less than 10 minutes. Please don't stick your arm in, okay?"

"Okay, I promise."

"Good, see you in a bit."

"The zookeeper will be here in 10 minutes to get your red car back."

"Oh, thank you...!!"

The young mother looked relieved.



"Hi. Where's the toy? Is it right at the front? Oh, there it is.."

Brett arrived shortly after and rather than jumping into the enclose from the front, he unlocked the side gate to make an entrance from the back of the enclosure, waving to the little boy who was still sobbing, missing his toy. The meerkats seemed quite oblivious to Brett's presence and carried on their merry way.

"Hi, Bob."

"Hey, Jane."

"Hey... um... Tina? Oops, sorry, Terrence"

Eddy raised an eyebrow.

Brett slowly walked up to the front part of the enclosure and picked up the little die-cast red car and handed it back to the little boy. The young mother smiled.

"Thank you so much....!"

"Not a problem."



"Brett.. do you actually know all their names..?"

Brett was on his lunch break and the two were munching on a burger meal at the zoo café.

"Yeah.. it's like a classroom of kindy kids... all 18 of them."

"Wow.. and.. you can tell them all apart?"

"Well, I've only been working with them for about 3 weeks... I'm learning. I swear, they all looked the same on my first day with them though."

Eddy found it amazing that Brett was starting to be able to tell them apart.

"Are they kinda aggressive?"

Brett looked up from his burger.

"No... not at all. Why do you say that?"

"I thought you were concerned they might gnaw my arm off if I stuck it in the enclosure."

Brett shrugged.

"Well, they could bite if they were frightened and I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate that whether it was your left or right hand.. plus from their perspective, it would scare the cr*p out of them to see a random arm reach into their enclosure.."

Eddy remembered how even casting his shadow made one of them run.

"Of course... gosh I'm so stupid.. sorry"

"Hey don't apologise, people have stuck their hands in to retrieve stuff in the past.. but ..."

"But what ?"

"We definitely prefer people not to do that.. you see we don't want others seeing it and think it's okay to do so.. we really prefer visitors to call us."

"Sure. Of course... So do you often get calls like that?"

"Yeah, kids drop stuff into enclosures all the time. Adults too. Toys, hats, phones... "

"I see. So what number should they call? I mean, I have your number but..."

"They just call the main zoo number and the staff can page us.  Like today, they would've paged someone nearby.. I was actually on the other side of the zoo when you rang."

"OMG I'm sorry."

Brett smiled.

"That's okay. I got to see you a bit earlier, didn't I?"

Eddy had to pause and restart his heart again.



"....Hi, um could you please page someone to get this emu.. he or she.. ..I dunno has escaped from its double-doored enclosure and is terrorising the visitors... it's just outside the double gates..."

Shortly after Eddy hung up he saw a couple of staff approach the large bird in an attempt to calm it down.

It was after Brett's lunch break and Eddy was wandering around the zoo a bit before he decided to go home. He got to watch Brett look after the meerkats which Eddy thought was adorable and he felt he had enough excitement for the day at the zoo, particularly after seeing that emu screech and looking as if it would poke someone's eye out.

As Eddy left the zoo grounds, he exclaimed.

"Oh, c'mon, no way."

He took out his phone again.

"Hi.. um sorry, again but could you please page someone to get this peacock... he must have just walked out from your front gate? Or maybe he flew out, I dunno, can they fly? I'm here with him on Prince Albert Street.. where I've parked my car... yes I'm serious, he's right here with me.."

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