Kurama stared out from Yomi's palace into the great plane of the Makai. The blackened sky hung like an oppressive blanket ready to smother him.
At least it reflected his mood. A mood which, over the past three months, had become increasingly dark, and cold.
Toya and the others training had been coming along better than expected. There would be war in the Makai, and it was his job to make sure Yomi won. He'd be fighting Yusuke and Hiei soon. Kurama was looking forward to it.
He had little else at this point.
"There you are," Yomi said coming up next to him.
Kurama could feel his friend's bloodlust, but he paid it no mind. Yomi wouldn't kill him even if he still wanted to do so.
They'd just been in another war meeting. Kurama's spies had picked up movement from the other factions and there was a lot of paranoia from Yomi's other advisors as to what that meant. But for Kurama, it was all just a large, logical game of chess. A game he was very good at. Sometimes Kurama thought Yomi kept the most hysterical of his advisors around just to create conflict. He knew Yomi enjoyed making him sink deeper into his old habits. Kurama hated that it was working.
"You seem contemplative."
Kurama shifted to his eyes to the side. "When am I not?"
"That's true, but you're also different than you used to be, which makes you less predictable. I doubt I'll get used to it."
"I'm still me."
"If you insist."
Kurama allowed his gaze to wander the barren landscape. For a long while the silence permeated between the two yokai. He could feel Yomi staring at him.
"What is it?"
"Once, I recall, long ago, you told me that great prizes are worth great risks."
"And?"
A faint smile ghosted Yomi's lips. "I'm just curious about your behavior. You've thrown yourself into the tasks I've given you with reckless abandon. I appreciate that, but I don't understand why you haven't, in, ah, other areas of your life. That woman seems important you."
Asuka.
At her mention, the ache he felt became more acute. It was as if his heart had the weight of a stone that had settled to the bottom of his rib cage.
Her absence had affected him deeply. Much as he tried, no amount of cold logic could make him forget her laughter, or the feel of her snuggling into his chest.
Kurama was surprised it had taken Yomi this long to mention her. Why now, of all times?
"She's not a prize."
Yomi smiled larger, aware he was pushing the right buttons. "Oh? Is that so."
Kurama continued to stare forward. "You're just saying that because you wish her to be a pawn in your game."
Yomi laughed. "Well, that is true. If she'd been around when I came to you with our proposal, I probably would have lifted her here to guarantee your cooperation."
If there was one bit of solace, it was that Asuka was safe somewhere.
At first, Kurama thought her leaving was to keep herself from becoming a hostage. If Yomi had kidnapped her, his anger might've made him do something foolish. There was no telling how the situation would've fared if she had been involved. And if Yomi found out about her ability...
At least he never discovered what she is capable of.
After he thought about Asuka's actions and behaviors, however, Kurama realized her leaving wasn't about evading Yomi—not completely anyway. If that were Asuka's only goal, she would've told him. He knew that. He imagined they would've spent a few happy days together before she packed up and left, promising to return to him when his business in the Makai was complete.
But she explicitly said they could never see each other again.
Why? Is it because of me? Am I going to do something unforgivable?
Some days he felt like he might.
"Well, if you want a woman to keep you company, I can arrange it," Yomi said, amused. "I'm sure we could find someone around here suited to your new tastes."
If he were honest, Yomi's offer was tempting. He'd been carrying a lot of pent-up aggression and sexual frustration due to everything that transpired over the past few months. It would feel good to let it out on someone used to having it rough.
But he knew that afterward, he'd sink to a new low. Because it wouldn't be her body he was joined with. It wouldn't be her ki swirling around him and comforting him. He'd simply become more angry. He'd hate himself for it.
"No."
Yomi sighed. "You were always stubborn. Fine, have it your way."
"Are we done here?" Kurama asked, his voice sharp.
"We're done. See you when you get back."
-* ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ *-
The next evening Kurama found himself walking up to the Tokyo University Orchestra hall. For the first time in three months, he knew where Asuka was going to be.
He wasn't planning on attending, but after Yomi mentioned Asuka to him, he worried. He told himself he was going because he wanted to make sure she was safe. He wasn't breaking her request if they didn't speak.
There was a large crowd of people slowly shuffling into the hall from all different age groups. Kurama quietly filed in with the rest. He kept his ki suppressed in case Asuka was somewhere close by. He didn't want her to know he was there.
When Asuka first told him about the competition, he didn't realize just how prestigious it was, but now it made sense. Apparently, Mieou had fought hard for Asuka to attend the competition even though she didn't attend the school anymore. Kurama guessed this was because there would be many recruiters from different private high schools coming to this event looking for talent. Being represented in this competition was important for the school's prestige.
Kurama made sure to stay towards the back, where Asuka couldn't see him.
He looked at the program and found she would make her appearance rather late in the evening. Based on the program, they were the only ones performing Ecstasy of Gold.
Kurama closed his eyes and thought about following her through that music store when she looked for the tape, and her face when she'd discovered it.
The very fibers of his soul missed her.
There was applause and Kurama opened his eyes to see the first group come onto the stage. They were performing a song from one of the Star Wars movies. The arrangement proved to be nothing special. The next group performed music from the classic Japanese film Naked Island. Kurama thought their arrangement much better.
Each group that performed upped his anticipation. His blood pulsed, and he took extra care to remain still.
She's next.
The crowd clapped, and his heart almost burst when she appeared.
Asuka wore a short black dress with a glittering gold ribbon tied around her waist, and a golden necklace. Her hair was pinned up which exposed the delicateness of her throat. He thought about how he'd been in the crook of her neck, and how his lips had been agonizingly close to her collar bone. He thought about the way she whimpered, and how good she smelled.
Asuka, he ached.
Asuka motioned with her hand and with a great smile, signaled. Kenji came onto the stage to polite applause. He also wore black and glittering gold. Once he was seated in front of the piano, Asuka sat. The rest of the ensemble, which was to the left, also sat in their chairs. She then nodded to Kenji, closed her eyes, and began to play.
The ensemble did not pick up their instruments like Kurama originally assumed. Instead, it was just Asuaka who played the beginnings of the melody. The notes were low, and she took her time. Her fingers danced around the keys with technical grace, yet simplicity. As the melody increased in volume, Kenji joined with his cello. He played long, drawn-out notes to back Asuka's playing. Then, they both stopped, and let the last note of the melody hang between them, as it faded in the chamber. Everyone held their breath.
Then, Asuka and Kenji switched roles. Asuka played the accompanying role while Kenji played the main melody. But he was more...skirting around the melody with staccatos, crescendos and decrescendos. Asuka's musical lines were perfectly in sync with Kenji's.
Kurama was in awe of them. Kenji played like there was no one else around except for Asuka. Each note bounced off the other's as they both got louder.
He understood why Asuka enjoyed spending time with Kenji. While Kurama deeply appreciated her musical skills, in the end he was just an outsider. Kenji understood this side of Asuka in a way he never could. Kenji shared her great love.
It made Kurama jealous. Their musical dance was making him jealous, too.
The ensemble players picked up their instruments and quietly added a background to their dance. The cello was skirting around high notes as the entire ensemble joined and the cello notes plunged as the ensemble played the main theme. Asuka's hands stopped, but a smile flashed across her face as she listened to the arrangement she'd created.
Most of the instruments cut out save for just a few as Asuka rejoined, without Kenji. She was playing the main theme front and center, starting low and building it upward to the high notes, playing louder as she got higher on the piano. Her face expressed pure joy as she played the theme, as if she were really discovering a treasure. When she got to the high notes, she finished the melody and stopped playing, leaving it to the rest of the ensemble. Kenji tapped his foot and waited for the moment when he would rejoin.
He did, loudly and decidedly, his hands down the fret as he played the high notes. He used a decrescendo, until he flitted back up to the top where Asuka began playing once again, her hands also trilling on the same notes.
Everyone, the ensemble, piano and cello played the same melody for the climax. The theme of gold ricocheted around the auditorium and pulled Kurama in, making him recall the treasure he once horded. He watched Asuka violently attack the keys of the piano, transfixed. Hunger gnawed at his gut.
He wanted her. He missed her. He was going crazy without her.
Why, Asuka?
The music ended with a bang. It echoed through the auditorium just moments before thunderous applause ripped through the seats. As the audience continued to cheer, Asuka stood up and bowed, then she motioned to Kenji, who also stood up and bowed. Kenji gestured to the rest of the ensemble who took their bow.
Then Kenji took Asuka's hand so they could bow together. Even from the back of the auditorium, Kurama could see how Asuka's eyes glittered-how she basked in the triumph of what they just created. Kurama tensed at their touching hands. That hand was his to hold, not...
Asuka isn't yours, Kurama reminded himself. He rubbed his temples.
"That arrangement was on a level I didn't even know a junior high schooler could make," said someone behind him. "I can't imagine this group won't win the competition."
The ensemble exited the stage. Kurama's throat felt dry.
"Oh I wholeheartedly agree!" a woman replied. "It was simply brilliant. And the celloist! I had no idea such a talent existed at this school."
"That was my son," his mom said, pride bursting in her voice. "He's really come out of his shell since he met Asuka."
"Oh?" the second woman said. "Lucky boy."
Kurama swallowed a possessive growl. He could feel himself shifting more toward Yoko even while sitting in the seats. He knew then, coming to watch Asuka was a mistake.
This is why we can't see each other. I can't be trusted to remain idle while someone else tries to win her affection. She's free to make her own choices, even if that choice isn't me.
It pained him, and the more aggressive part of his nature hissed.
Kurama stood up and shuffled out of the row and walked out of the auditorium. He needed to leave before he lost control of himself.
I shouldn't have come tonight. I can't let Yomi get under my skin like that again. Was his goal to upset my emotional balance?
Probably.
When Kurama got out into the lobby, he froze. There, at the end of the hallway, was Asuka. She was alone, leaning against the brick wall with her eyes closed. Her shoulders were slouched, and he could see tears running down her face.
It was such a different picture of her than the one of her on stage just a moment before.
The loneliness he saw reflected his own, weary heart. Did she still love him after all?
As he watched her, he knew. Those tears were about him.
He wanted to go to her. He imagined taking her in his arms, quietly kissing her and assuring her that he'd never leave her. That their suffering was pointless.
He almost did. He took a single step toward her before he heard Ena's voice call for her.
"Be right there!" her melodic voice said. "Just getting some water!" Asuka fiercely wiped her eyes and squared her shoulders. When she turned, Kurama slunk into the shadows.
Ena and the other members of the music club surrounded her with praise and congratulations. Kenji gave Asuka an embrace, which made her smile.
Take care of her, Kenji. You're all she has now.
Kurama turned into the darkness and left the building. When he was free, the night air hit, and he broke out into a sprint. He ran. He ran, and ran, and ran. He ran until he exhausted himself. With no strength remaining, Kurama collapsed under the leaves of a Sakura tree at sunrise.