Author's Note:
This chapter was made possible with the help of @missgoodtrip.
~
"Double kill."
Those were Asaila's first words when I told her about what I saw in the mall. And she was right. I was like a weak character in Metacosmos that Bral could knock out and double kill. I was getting over with Rick, but just when I thought I had someone new did I realize I was hurt by a more painful obstacle of life.
"You know, maybe I was right before. I couldn't have a love life or such right now. I have to focus on my studies and family. Yes, that's it." I said while opening the latest issue of Guinness Book of World Record that I randomly picked from the library self, I furiously scanned through the pictures without reading their captions.
"Did you really know who she is? You don't, right? Therefore, why are you acting like that? Talk to him!" Asaila's purportedly whisper did not turn out successful. We received glares from students on other tables including the Librarian with bun-style hair filled with strikes of silver because of age.
I sent her an apologetic smile but my friend did not seem to mind other people and acted it was just her and I in the library. "Quiet, A!" I hissed. "I am fully aware that it is painful, extremely painful, but it's not the end of the world for me. You don't need to shout and tell everyone about it." She sighed and returned to read a fashion magazine with the 15th century theme.
"You know, I was amazed by how we were able to live in two centuries and two decades, not literally but technically." She said while scanning. I knew she loved fashion and such, but reading magazine from centuries ago was not like her.
"What's that, huh?" I asked, trying to remove Joshua-shits from my mind. The whole hiding from him went on for the whole week. During breaks, I would hide in the deepest corners of the library and read. Yep, I did not eat lunch.
She lowered the book from her nose and looked at me with humor. "A magazine?" She raised a brow.
I rolled my eyes at her. "Hell, I know what it is; I was asking what is with it that you're reading." I thought I said it a little harshly because we got the center of attention once again in the library.
"Chill, Thony." Asaila laughed and gestured her hands down. Her curls were bounced a little. "You should have just asked why. Anyway, didn't you know?"
I waited for her to continue but then I realized she was waiting for my answer to the blurry question. "No, I didn't because you still haven't told me."
She smirked and rolled her eyes this time. Jeez, our friendship indeed was full of eye-rolling, would not be complete without. "Heard about the school dance? It is coming soon. We better prepare our dresses."
School dance? Ohh, I remembered! It was the bet I had with Joshua before. "Yeah, heard it before. But why... too old? Are you planning to look retro?"
She flipped the mag covers and showed me a lady model wearing a long red velvet gown. "See this? You will wear this. It will look perfect on you."
I got the magazine and turned the pages. The gowns were all gorgeous and gregarious, but I noticed the smiles from the models. They were not real smiles, some were not even smiling like they were in different world, a mean and prideful world. I stared at the gown she was pointing at me and complained. "The corset is too huge. I could not carry that kind!"
"Well," she snatched the magazine again and shrugged. "No choice. Everyone will wear that kind of dress or they will feel out-of-place."
"Is it the theme?" I asked.
"The posters and invitations are everywhere! Yep, the theme is the fiftieth century—'Dare to Dream.'" She emphasized by waving the air infront of her. How come I had not seen the posters? The StuPub Layout Artists probably made the.
The door opened and I was shocked to see Rick opened the door for Liza, of course. Asaila followed my gaze and I instantly smiled when Liza looked at me. She smiled sweetly and waved. Rick also smiled but his eyes looked away. Asaila nudged my elbow. "No hard feelings?"
"None." I said because it was like another first time when I looked at them both and saw my friends, nothing more to describe them.
"Thonia," Liza walked to our desk and handed me a flyer with classic vintage design. Rick followed behind her. "Hope you can support the dance party next month." Rick was the president of the Student Council so maybe that's why she was supportive for her boyfriend.
I glanced at Rick but he was looking at the ground or at the edge of the table, wasn't sure. "I am not—"
"Sure we will!" Asaila got the flyer Liza was offering me and smiled widely.
"Great." Rick instantly said and finally took a look at me with a slight smile. "Don't forget to bring your dates if ever."
"Oh, and make sure you'll wear something that matches the theme." Liza added.
"Actually," Asaila showed her magazine. "Actually we were preparing for it as early as now. We feel excited."
"That means so much." Liza squeezed my shoulder and they sat on the free desks far from us to give more posters.
"Do you mean, you are preparing for it as early as now?" I corrected her statement because I honestly did not feel like coming.
"Don't be kill joy! This is a dance party, okay? We will burn the dance floor!" She said with ecstasy. "Wait, we will burn the eyes of boys first using our beauty before the dance floor." I laughed at how crazy my friend was.
"Do you think you can ask Art in?" I abandoned the Guinness Book of World Records and slouched on my chair.
She leaned her chin on her arms those were folded on the desk. "Probably," she said. "I am not good in asking a guy out first. It seemed inappropriate."
"You're the one who got the invitation, I guess it is fine."
She nodded and looked at me. When you received one of those suspicious stares, beware of what you might get. I fixed the loose strands of my hair and slapped her shoulder. "Shut up, Asaila. There's no way I will go with him."
Asaila laughed. "I didn't say anything, Thones."
"I know you very well, your thoughts and your words, even if you are yet to say them."
"Ugh, is that how much you love me?" Asaila attempted to hug me but I flinched.
The Librarian hissed at us. I stood and took Asaila's clingy arms. "Maybe this isn't our place. Let's go out."
"Out? Isn't it windy today?"
The weather forecast could be wrong. "I want fresh air."
"Fine!" she said and we went to the school playground just outside the building.
Just like the past years I was with Asaila, we hung on the swing set infront of a tree and a bench. Luckily, it was an irregular break that meant there weren't a lot of students outside the classrooms. I sat on one of the swing and she sat on the other. "I will miss this place when we graduate," Asaila said out of nowhere.
I stared at the tree and smiled sadly because I agreed with her. This place was meaningful for the both of us. This was our favorite place where we would sneak for our crushes in middle school and study for exams. For me, another memoir of his spot was that this was the place where Joshua found me after my talk with Rick. It was the first time I captured his photo in my camera.
From the distance, I saw the back of Joshua's hair. I did not know why I recognized it but I knew it was him. He turned and saw us. I thought he was approaching but I stood from my swing and startled Asaila who had been busy with her phone. "Hey, any problem?"
"Nothing," I lied. "Let's just go inside."
"But I thought you—" I glared at her and ordered her to stand up. Thankfully, she obeyed and we went back to the building.
~
Asaila went to her next class and I was left with thirty more minutes to spare before my next.
That was so ridiculous, Thonia. Why were you even running away from him?
I wasn't running away from him. I just want to keep distance. I just don't want to talk to him.
But what's the difference?
I sighed and leaned on the countered sink of the third floor comfort room. Infront of me was my reflection on the moist mirror. I pony my hair and sighed again. "You will face him next time, Thonia. Act normal. Act normal..." I repeated. "Act normal."
How could I act normal if whenever I saw him I could see his picture with that girl? I was pained. And I hated to admit that those lists and steps I had made ever since could not be use in my situation.
I went out of the comfort room ten minutes before my next class and walked cautiously to the Senior's locker hall. I really had no idea why I wanted to hide from him, but it just felt the most right thing in all the worst things. I did not want to worsen the situation and ruin what was left in our friendship. Stupid Thonia... falling for your friend...
Once I was sure that he was not anywhere near me, I headed straight for my locker. I quickly got my books for the next class and cursed when I remembered I had Speech and Literature. Three of the clowns would be there: Stephen, Gabe and Joshua.
A hand touched my shoulder and I jumped. A few of my stuff fell to the ground and I turned to see Stephen. He laughed at my horror-stricken face. "What the hell is wrong with you?"
I sighed. "I thought you were Joshua."
He gave me a confused look mixed with irritation and sympathy. "Why are you hiding from him? Because of what you saw in the mall?" He got down on his knees to get my fallen stuffs. "It's not like the end of the world if you talk to him. Let him explain or confirm if it is true." He got up and helped me set my locker. "Besides, I think he's a bit confused so I think he wants to clear things out."
I rolled my eyes. I got a quick suspicion he knew more than what I knew. Maybe he officially knew that Josh and that girl really were dating. "I don't care." I said and then I heard the familiar laughter echoing from the halls. "I have to go."
Stephen looked behind his back and laughed at my face again. "We have the same class, mind if you wait for us?"
"I need to run something. I'm fine. Bye!" I sped through the halls.
"Dude, you look so pale. StuPub meeting later after class!" He shouted.
I showed a thumb up and ran out of sight. I ignored all the looks my classmates gave me since I was panting. Even Rick, who was already inside the room gave me a curious look. I sat on the first seat in front, knowing Joshua and the others would not mind sitting beside me because they hated front rows in classes. I doubted they would even care to look for me. Did I really worth something for them?
I sighed and got my book, notebook and pen from my bag. Someone threw his bag on the chair beside me and I looked quickly, scared that it might be Joshua. Thankfully, it was Gabe. I sighed in relief. "You know, hiding from us and ignoring us will do you no good." He sat down and the chair moved slightly.
I shrugged and acted tough. "I don't care. By the way, where is he?"
Gabe laughed and sat on my other side. "So much for not caring... He's seated beside Nikki."
I felt a small pang in my chest. Nikki and then Tina. I turned back but did not see him beside Nikki. Now I was worried where he really was. I hoped he would not be late, but I also hope he would not come in class. I got a problem with him but he was still my... friend?
Stephen came in and ironically sat beside Gabe. I listened to Mister Tara while he was discussing a Filipino classic story with the theme revenge and love. To my own strife of thoughts, I had not even taken notes. "Here he is, the Royal Highness," Gabe said and pouted his lips to the door. Stephen and I turned and saw Joshua with his camouflage backpack and books. Mister Tara simply gestured for him to come in and sit down; no long lectures unlike most of our teachers.
Josh in all probability sat beside our classmate who had serious hair problem who liked to sit at the back corner of every class. I only knew that without turning at him because it was the only vacant seat I saw earlier. Stephen looked at me. "Well, if it makes you feel any better, it was the only chair that was available in this room. He had his eyes on this seat and well I know you really don't want to spend an entire hour sitting in awkwardness."
I smiled at him for his attempt to cheer me up. "Thanks, Ken."
When Mister Tara started to write longer series of words on the board, I started writing notes too to divert my attention, even so, I could not comprehend what the teacher was writing or discussing; I copied it directly. Even if I was trying so hard focusing on writing, I could still feel Joshua's eyes on me—on us, particularly, his friends. I refused to look behind me but whenever I did, I saw him looking. That went on for almost an hour. I had no idea if Joshua even took notes, based on his records, he did not need to.
When the teacher finished writing, he looked at us and took a breath like he wrote the notes on the board five consecutive times. "It was like all his efforts and means to take revenge on the people who separated him and his love got wiped out because of life's unfortunate fate. Because even so he attained vengeance, he knew that no one could repay the past time; the life that was taken away from him and the love that he dreamed of reuniting..."
After more explanations and discussions, he grinned and sat down on his chair and said, "So tomorrow, we'll have a graded recitation on this and if we have time, maybe a quiz too. So study your notes."
A chorus of groans echoed through the classroom. I think the only people who did not were Rick and Joshua. Well, they were the overall top one and two in our batch, so that was no surprise. I put my things back in my bag and waited for the bell to ring.
I fixed my things and readied myself to catapult out right after the bell. All the students and our teacher waited patiently for the bell. "Thony, there will come a time when you really have to talk to him." Gabe held my arm. The bell rang and I had no choice but to sprint out.
I went to my locker to return all my books because there was no homework for tomorrow. Glad more time to do my Thonia things.
~
Before going up to the StuPub room for the meeting, a girl approached me. I rarely noticed who she was but then I got familiar by her voice. She was Trish with braces and contact lens. I knew her from some classes and rumored had a crush on Joshua. "Uhm so are you going up to the publication meeting?"
I nodded. "Yeah. Why?"
Trish reached something from her bag. It was a small plastic bag. "Thonia, right? I'm Trish, I sat with Asaila at lunch earlier and she wanted me to give this to you." She handed me the plastic bag.
"Uhm, thanks," I muttered and checked the paper bag. It was slices of sandwiches. I smiled at Asaila's thoughtfulness. "Thanks, Trish!" I said.
Trish retreated and shouted. "No problem!"
I approached the room for the student publication meeting. The door was open and I immediately saw that Gabe and Stephen were already inside. I sat down beside Gabe who was seated next to Stephen.
I opened the paper bag again and immediately smelled the cheese and meat. "Yummy," Gabe said and closed the lid of his laptop.
Stephen touched Gabe's shoulder and said, "Everything is yummy for you, Gabby. They are Thonia's, so hands up."
Gabe frowned. I opened the bag and offered some to them. "Want some?"
Miraculously for the first time, Gabe rejected my food offer. Was it because they could sense I haven't eaten?
Mrs. Tobi was not there yet so I decided to call my friend, Asaila. She answered in the first ring. "Asaila Gorgeous speaking. May I help you?"
I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Thank you for the sandwich..." I peeked in the bag and remembered there were two of them so I added the plural form. "...es."
"Don't mention it. I know you haven't eaten lunch again in your break. Don't worry; it will be the last time because I will have lunch break with you tomorrow. No more sneaky diet!"
"I don't do diet! I was studying for the Physics exam." I lied.
"For two days?"
"Yesterday was Social Studies."
"Yeah, right. I don't want to attend the meeting because I don't feel writing for the next issue."
Mrs. Tobi entered the room with her peach dress and pink scarf. "Talk to you later."
"Okay. By the way, tell Mrs. Tobi I have a project to finish if they'll look for me." She said and I instantly checked the opposite door. She peeked and waved quickle then went out of sight before Mrs. Tobi or my other clubmates saw her craziness.
A junior year girl handed Mrs. Tobi the attendance sheet she wrote. "Oh! Complete attendance except for Miss Visca! That's very good but tell her about this." She smiled and clapped her hands. "Hmmm, so I would like to inform you all that the issue we did was all ready for printing again." A chorus of cheers echoed through the room. "Yes, yes, after losing the file multiple times." She eyed the boys beside me because they were one reason why the file got lost several times, thanks for back-up memory it was restored.
The students settled down and she continued, "So by next week, writers will be submitting new articles. Faye, you're assigned with a book review. Cole, you'll be making a movie review, Nikki, you're assigned with the Career Fair," Miss Tobi said. She looked for more people to assign. I wanted to hide under the chair for her not to notice me that's why when her eyes landed on mine, I froze. I prepared myself to say something but she looked far at the back so I sighed.
Joshua's voice interrupted my dreading of what might be assigned to me. "Miss Tobi, I'm not a writer."
Mrs. Tobi smiled and looked back at me with malicious grin. "Joshua! You'll be working with Thonia again. The review last time got praises from the principal."
"I haven't watched any new movies this month, Ma'am. I guess someone else can do it." I protested.
Mrs. Tobi's smile got wider and stood to walk near me in the aisle. "Enough silly reviews for you both. You'll be assigned to write a magical article for our coming dance party. I assume both of you will come."
Joshua kept quiet but I didn't. "I'm sure Joshua can do it all on his own, Miss Tobi. You can assign me with another new one or I can start editing other's articles."
"That's the last of it actually, so meeting adjourned!" Mrs. Tobi hurriedly got up and left not caring what she just did to ruin more of my life.
So much for hiding and ignoring!
Gabe and Stephen awkwardly turned red by preventing their laughter. I stood and be the first one to leave the room. When I got out, Asaila was laughing. "Talk about fate." So, she must have heard the article assignment.
"Shut up." I slung my bag on my shoulders. I saw the three clowns looking at me from inside. I grabbed my friend's arm and loudly said, "Come on, we can't miss the bus again."
"Don't you mean you can't miss the bus again? We live in different directions." She stood without an attempt to move. I glared at her then she followed me.