Hate Me Closer (Phan)

Chapter One

Daniel Howell hadn't had the chance to look around Auburn Independent School for Boys. That was until the day he stood outside the gates of the building, a single suitcase in hand and his parents wrapping their arms around the young boy's shoulders. He lived five hours down south to the old sandstone build, so his parents couldn't justify the travel cost. His mother swore to him he'd be alright, even if he knew less about his new school than he did about America.

He'd travelled up once before, so he wasn't totally unfamiliar with the village his secondary school was situated in. Although, he was thrown into the Great Hall to take his entrance and scholarship examinations, then took the train journey back home with his father. It wasn't a welcoming experience and since he had his letter of acceptance and inclusive fees, he wondered whether he should have purposefully failed his exams.

He wasn't sure whether it was the five-foot-high cobbled fences, the large brass gate, the old oak trees or the campus that seemed to take up half the village, but whatever it was that caused the sense of dread that rose in him, he didn't like it. But, it was cost-free and better than the local state secondary he was in for the last two years. He hoped it would be, at least.

"Hello there, are you Mr Howell?" a lady in a long, navy skirt and a white blouse asked.

Dan nodded, looking upwards at the finger and feebly replying, "Yes." he was thirteen years old, but he felt about three.

"Lovely to meet you, I'm Mrs Blackwell and I'll be your House Mistress for the next five years." a dog trailed leadless behind her, "And this is Jasper, you'll probably be seeing more of him than you do me." she chuckled, but Dan didn't laugh.

"Well, I'll see you at the end of term, Sweety." Dan's mother finalised, "Have a good four months."

"Three and a half, really." Mrs Blackwell corrected, giving a friendly shrug.

"Bye." Dan waved to his parents, his father passing his schoolbag towards him.

"Have a good time."

"Thanks, Dad." Dan looked at Mrs Blackwell, letting her lead him down the stone path, through the gates of the school campus. He noticed how the trees were perfectly positioned as he trod down the path, with occasional lamps to light the way during the darker hours. The grass was perfectly trimmed and not a single stone fell off onto the strands.

Mrs Blackwell spoke up again as they took a left turn, away from the gates of the main building, "Ahead of us just then was the main school, it used to be a manor house, built in the 1600s and expanded on for three-hundred years. It became a school in 1761, before the houses between here and the old village were built, now merging into one big village." Dan didn't think it was very big. It felt quite claustrophobic, if he was honest.

"Where am I sleeping?" Dan asked, assuming it was the building ahead.

"So, as you can see, there's the blocks around the main build. They were built to accommodate boarding pupils as the school grew, so they're all different ages. They're named after the architects, although they all follow similar building styles. As you know, you're in Hepburn. It's the second-oldest build, dating to 1782." Dan didn't care for dates, "You'll learn a lot of this over the next few weeks, but each house has its own name and colour. This is why your tie is brown, with the house emblem at the base. The shield on your blazer is the school emblem. There's also Crossings, Gatesby, Cheshire, Darby, Colonel, Graphing, and Alexander. Eight houses, twelve boys per year in them. There are ninety-six pupils per year, in total."

They stopped outside a building not too dissimilar to the main school, but it was about a twelfth of the size and had the Hepburn house emblem engraved and coloured in the stone above the double-doorway. Mrs Blackwell smiled, opening the door to the cold build, "Come on in, then. Let's get you to your dorm."

The inside was nothing like the outside, it looked as though it had been renovated in the nineties, with neat, cream walls, fabric furniture, and light-wooden accents for the stairwell and framing, "To the right, you have the Common Room, and that goes down to the back. On the left, there is the Dining Room. As you can see ahead, there's the Cloakroom if you ever need to quickly store some things, and then behind that, right at the back, are mine and the house Matron's flats. You're alright with dogs, aren't you?"

"Yeah." Dan nodded, looking at Jasper.

"Well, Jasper has free reign, but if he ever goes into your dorm feel free to ask him to leave."

"Okay." Dan nodded, his eyes turning to the older-looking boy now standing in the open doorway of the Common Room.

"Hey there!" the boy greeted, placing his palm out for Dan to shake, "I'm Antonio, but just call me Ant, and I'm the Head of House."

"Ant's job is to make sure you're all settled in and know your way around. He's going to take you up to your dorm now and let you get settled in. I'll see you at supper." Mrs Blackwell waved, leaving out the front door again. Dan assumed she had another pupil to greet.

"Mrs Blackwell is a lovely House Mistress, she also teaches Latin which you'll be forced to do for a year." Ant chuckled, "Let me take your suitcase up the stairs for you." Dan passed him the bag, walking him up the stairs, "So, all the houses are split into two sides: lower school and upper school. Lower is First Form and Second Form. Upper is Third Form and Sixth Form, so upper forth and lower forth. It sounds complicated, but you'll get your head around it soon enough, and we have a leaflet placed on your bed to explain the basics. Now, the upper years bunk on the right, and as we go to the left...well, here are the lower years. There are three dorms of four for each year, so thirteen dorms in total. Well, that's because there's one less form for both sixth form years." Ant looked at Dan, whose eyes were wide and lips slightly parted in fear, "You don't need to know that. Sorry, you're the first of the firsties, so I've not refined my tour yet."

"It's okay." Dan smiled, stopping outside a dorm door.

"There are two sinks, a shower and a toilet to each dorm. There is also a bath off the cloakroom downstairs. Each dorm is labelled by the year number you're in and then a, b, or c. They're assigned randomly and we have a shuffle every now and again. Come on, you're in 1a."

Dan was thankful the beds weren't bunks. Instead, there were two beds placed vertically to the two side walls, and two beds horizontal on the far one. Each bed seemed to be designed perfectly for storage, with a pinboard hanging over it. His bed was made with brown covers and a leaflet, Prep Diary, and tie against the duvet.

"The shower and toilet are in the cubicles to the right, and as you can see the sinks are to the left." Ant stated, Dan seeing the fire door blocking his view, "You're a scholar, aren't you?" he asked.

"Yeah." Dan nodded, "English. How did you know?"

"You've got the scholar clip on your tie." Ant pointed out. Dan smiled at the tag, it was a small, metal clasp that clipped onto the base, just above the Hepburn emblem. The sixth-former sighed, "I've got to help the next one in. I'd recommend you unpack your stuff, it makes life easier later. I've got to do this tour eleven more times." he chuckled.

"Thanks, Ant."

"See you around, Kid." he smiled, walking away from the dorm.

Dan took a breath in, sitting on his duvet and unfolding his tie, looking at the fabric in front of him. He then opened his Prep Diary, seeing an allocated space next to each day for him to write his homework, which this posh school seemed to be calling 'Prep'. His timetable was printed on the first page, listing eleven subjects he was forced to take. Saturday was dedicated to sport. He didn't like the sound of that.

He closed the cover, now opening the paper leaflet he was gifted, seeing it explain how the school worked, with a map of the campus on the back. He was utterly overwhelmed and terrified, but for the first time in a long while, he believed he might be alright.