Winds of Fate [Books I-III]

Chapter Forty-Seven: Old Friends (Part Two)

"As much as I want to leave..."

Eleanore cannot speak. Her eyes wander to Madeline's waist, but her belly was hidden by that blue petticoat. She cannot fathom it. Her dear friend is going to be a mother. Madeline has long since dreamed of this happy occasion, and yet from her trembling lips and evading gaze Eleanore knows she is far from feeling joy.

"You will be a mother," Eleanore manages to whisper. "Maddy..." Her lips curl down. She cannot smile too. And yet her better judgment forces her to remember that a child is a blessing no matter what. And this is Madeline's child. Even if Longbourne is half of that tiny soul, Eleanore cannot find herself to hate the innocent baby as her love for the mother overtakes all hate for the father.

Madeline doesn't meet her eyes, lost in her own thoughts. "They have been pressuring me. You see Matthew is his father's only heir to the duchy. If we don't have a son, his second cousin will inherit everything. And..I-" Madeline's eyes fill with tears once more. "I..." She bites her lip, wiping her tears away. "I miscarried two children already."

"Oh, no... how..." Eleanore hangs her head, unable to comprehend how dark her friend's life had become. She holds Madeline's arms. "I am sorry..."

"No," Madeline shakes her head. "Don't be. I would rather not give that man any offspring!" And then she sobs. "But this is my baby..." Her chest racks with tears. "I cannot...I cannot provide for this child alone. That's mad! Where will we go? I have no choice."

"Maddy-"

"Nellie," Madeline pats her shoulder. "I am happy for you, truly. But I am not your responsibility." She takes a deep breath, sniffling the rest of her tears back into her nose. "I am touched that you think of me, that you want to take me away. Truly! If circumstances were different, I would have gladly left with you at this moment..."

"But you can!" Eleanore nods enthusiastically, a plan forming in her mind. "We can take care of the baby-"

"On a ship?" Madeline exclaims. "Oh Lord, Nellie! Last we saw each other you were the sensible one!"

"But you cannot stay here!" Eleanore insists, tugging her friend's silk sleeves. "If you do not want to sail, you can stay with us until you give birth and if you want you may leave for some colony. Take your jewelries with you so you have money and I will give you my shares. I do not need any of it. That will be enough for you to live comfortably until you-"

Those darling blue eyes lose all the twinkle in them. Eleanore gapes, words failing her. This is worse than a nightmare. Not only is Madeline married to the monster, she is bound forever by the child. Tears spring in Eleanore's eyes, her throat drying up and the threatening fever haunting her all morning flares up to life.

"We both know..." Madeline begins, her voice dull and lifeless. "A pregnant woman without a husband is cast off, except if she was a widow. Even if I hate him, I cannot wish for his death..." She sobs, covering her mouth with her hands. "He is still the father of this child." Her hands fall over her stomach once more. "More than that, he can provide everything for his heir, will give him a title and riches. And me? What can I give my baby? A life on the run? I have had my dreams, Nellie."

Eleanore hangs her head, the tears falling down her cheeks and making saltwater rivers on her face that she cannot bear to burden Madeline with.

"But dreams end when you become a mother." Madeline softly reflects, pressing a hand over her heart as she recoups from her own tears.