Her Light - His Darkness✔

Chapter 28

I reach for the orange transparent tablet bottle under my pillow when a yawn escapes past my chapped lips. I tilt the bottle into my hand and one tablet falls out. I swear I had more.

I gulp the pill down, reaching for my phone and without thinking I shoot a quick text to Celia.

I don't bother looking at the date or time anymore, each day blending into one. Each day feeling like the previous one.

"Lo, can I come in?"

I hide the empty bottle before I walk carefully over to my bedroom door, avoiding all the papers scattered on my floor.

"Morning Gabs, is it time to drop you off at Mrs Francis already?" I yawn out as the exhaustion from the sleepless nights I've been having catches up to me, the pill not working as fast as I would've liked.

"It's nine am Lo and it's Saturday."

"Oh."

"Can you make breakfast please; the cereal is finished." Gabby says quietly.

"Of course."

"Lo?"

"Yes Gabs."

"C-Can we go to Christian and Ava today?"

I stop in my tracks at the mention of his name, Gabby bumps into me from behind and I stumble.

"Logan, can we? It's been three weeks; I really miss them."

Three weeks?

Has it really been three weeks since that day?

Since Christian showed me that we're connected not only by our loss, but by the same accident that stole something from the both of us that can never be replaced.

Fate has connected us in the worst of ways and I'm unable to move past this. I'm unable to move forward. I'm stuck in a continuous fucking loop, repeating the moment over and over in my head wishing, hoping he didn't show me the crosses side by side.

Christian's brother and his friend destroyed my life, ripping it to shreds the moment they climbed into that car intoxicated. I wouldn't be in this mess now if they had just stayed the fuck at home.

Mikey wasn't driving the car that night but he's the one that had to pay the ultimate price along with my family, but the driver, Donovan, he fucking survived.

Ana Thompson told me about him, he suffered a spinal injury, he was supposed to be paralyzed for the rest of his life, but he made a miraculous recovery while the rest of us are still struggling to pick up the broken pieces of what's left of our lives after that night, what bullshit!

Does Donovan ever think about that night while his stomach twists and knots with the guilt of what he has done?

Does he feel the world on his shoulders, pressing down on him, making each step he takes harder than the last each time he is able to take a step forward?

"Logan?" I feel Gabby shaking my arm.

"Yes Gabby?" I sigh, rubbing my tired eyes.

"Can we go?"

"I'll take you and fetch you Gabs, but I... I have a ton of studying to do."

Three weeks... since Christian told me he's in love with me.

Three fucking weeks that I embarrassingly fainted as his words dawned on me.

Has it really been that long, it feels like just yesterday when I woke up in Chris' moving car without uttering a word to him, silently climbing out, not so much as looking back as I felt his eyes on me, allowing myself to break down the moment I closed the front door.