Chapter 21
10th June Wednesday.
7th April
I don't care but I'm made to care. By my frickin mind. Its crazy, I know, even in any small situation, I just think so damn much, all the time. I just always have so many stuff in my head and they don't goes away. I've told I should snap out of them. That I should be able to, but I can't. It's not great.
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Huh. So? Nobody I guess can snap out of the thoughts. But thinking about it. It should've been well. Overthinking is kind of a curse, as I've seen (movies ofcourse) and I guess it's practically not possible to scare away a thought telling it 'hey go away, I don't want you right now.'
But you just need to.
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It basically goes like me something happens and then I go on to 'what if's and 'what if not's and some times it feels real, and I don't know. I get scared. I replay conversations.
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It does kills your happiness. You just think what and how and why, go back and forth, and it stops at the worse. That's all. It kills that happiness.
I'm understanding things so much. Maybe reading her words is making me understand so many things.
It's a good sign I hope.
She wasn't like that. We weren't like that.
We used to have somethings like "snack dates" or just "show me around dates," or just video chatting. So like, sometimes at the evening we used to video chat. Mostly, I had to bring my stuff to room and switch on the laptop and we'd see each other. And she always has so many things to say me, always in the over excited tone. She used to show me the little crafts, she used to make, which were supposed to be cute but she's creates a disaster out of it. It's like, what initially was planned turns out to be a completely different thing.
And her kitchen chores, just don't think she cooks good. She can be the official disaster cook. One day she made pasta, after what she video called me, and from what I saw, it was thankful that she hadn't burnt herself, her dress was all in food stains. Moving in to the kitchen, it was like a war zone. With water dripping out of the tap, some greens' peels, onions, all the pots shattered.
And we used to laugh about, all on that.
But that was years ago, maybe we drifted apart. Maybe lack of time? I was being busy, or she was? Or we were beginning to be self conscious? Being shy? Being humiliated?
Damn. Really?
We literally aren't the ones we used to be.
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Waaaaahhhhh. Just tell me no? I'm getting so scared and I don't know what the hell I'm thinking and please do something.
2nd edit done for this.
3rd round of edits.
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The Broken Blossom
Teen FictionBeing the iconic person all his life, Ashton is a great and happy teenager with people swooning all over. But everything changes in a week, when a plot twist enters his 'Ashton-verse', when he least expected. Read on to see how everything changes a...
