BARE SOULS: A STEAMY TEACHER/STUDENT ROMANCE

CHAPTER 68 | HARPER

Opening my eyes was the hardest thing to do the next morning. I wish I could have said that sleeping had made things better, but the pain within me was as vivid as the night before. 

I didn't need a minute to recollect why I was feeling so nauseous, I knew too damn well why. I had been betrayed, lied to, tricked and manipulated for months. I had build myself a fantasy world based on thin air simply because I wanted to believe that guy was better than his appearance shouted. 

I was disgusted. Disgusted at him for what he did, but above all, disgusted at myself for how naïve I had been all along. No matter how aware I was of me throwing in something I was not able to comprehend, I deliberately ignored all his warnings and pushed through while eluding that I didn't know anything about him, not because I didn't try to, but because he played his part to perfection in concealing anything that could kill my resolve to fall for him. 

But I still couldn't understand why. Why would he play me with such talent? Why would he tell me he loved me? Why taking it to that extent?

My head was hurting with all the questions that crossed my mind. Rolled over and pulled my blanket above my head, closing my eyes as I felt tears uncontrollably falling from my eyes. I wanted to forget it all and for that pain to leave me. But how could it when I could feel my heart ripping with every single of my heartbeats?

So I slept, hoping that the next time I will open my eyes, I would realize that it was all a terrible nightmare. But as my eyes reopened, the pain did not vanish. So I closed them again... repeating this useless circle again and again in hope I would forget about it all. 

I pretended to feel sick on Monday, which was not technically a lie as my nose was stuffy with all the tears I cried and my stomach was completely upset with all the toxic emotions crossing my mind, so I did not really have to convince Lorie. 

Tuesday was not any better and Wednesday had the same flavor. All I did was stay in bed, sleeping whenever I could and crying all the tears I had left once I opened my eyes. I was unable to swallow anything without feeling like I was going to puke it all so the only meals I had were composed of clear soup and vitamin water. At some point, Lorie got so concerned that she wanted to drive me to the ER, which I obviously declined.

I was not physically sick, I knew that much. It was just my soul that needed to be revived.

Since I declined a trip to the hospital, Lorie negotiated that if I was not feeling any better by the end of the week, she would drag me there forcefully. She informed the school that I caught the flu and I was able to stay home for the rest of the week. But I knew I could not hide forever that way. I knew graduation was approaching and that I would eventually have to go back soon. Even though I knew that much, sitting in his class and seeing his face was terrifying me. 

    "How are you feeling today?" Lorie asked on Friday morning when she saw me pouring myself a cup of coffee. Part of me was feeling guilty for pretending to be sick as she decided to stay home all week to take care of me. Even though I would have preferred for her to go on with her daily activity, I also found comfort in the fact that I was not alone throughout this dark time. Even if I couldn't talk to her about what had truly happened, I still found her presence and her concern soothing as I realized I was not entirely alone.

 I forced a smile as I glanced at her worried face. "A little bit better today, thanks!"

She looked at me with insistence, hinting me that she somehow understood that I was not telling the truth. after a long and very uncomfortable silence, she let out a long sigh. "You know baby girl... a lot of you reminds me of how I was in my younger days." she softly smiled as she put a hand on mine.