You Are Lisa Simpson

Kidnapped

Homer decided to go have a few drinks with his pals at Moe's. He was sitting there drinking watching the Isotopes game. He remembered when he danced for the team. He only remembered when he saved them from moving to Albuquerque.

"You think they'll make the playoffs this year?" Lenny asked.

"Playoffs?" Carl replied. "I just hope we can win a game."

"Maybe Burns can replace all the guys on the team with pros like he did that one time. Whatever happened to the players." Moe chuckled.

"From what I heard Ken Griffey Jr. Still has gigantism, Roger Clemans still thinks he's a chicken, and Ozzie Smith has been missing ever since."

"Well that least Mike Scioscia got his super magical powers." Carl looked over to Homer. "I saw Lisa won that contest. Congrats, Homer."

"Are you guys not mad at me for saying Bruno Mars was here when he wasn't?"

"Homer, you've done worse than that. Believe me we're not mad." Lenny said. "Where are your kids now?"

"Maggie is at home with Marge and Bart went to a comic convention with some friends. Lisa and her friends went to a museum."

"Why didn't you go?" Lenny asked.

"Pfftt. And waste my time with a bunch of eggheads, no thank you." Homer said downing his beer.

Across town Lisa, Allison, and Samatha were all at the Springfield History Museum. Lisa had thought it would be a fun way to spend the day there. Allison agreed as she had some of the same hobbies as Lisa. Samantha wasn't as smart as them but it was always nice to get out of the house. They walked up to a mannequin that was wearing the very uniform that Jebidiah Spingfield was known to wear. Lisa began to read something that was there.

"Jebisiah Springifeld founded our great city in 1796 when Jebidiah and Shelbyville Manhattan traveled west to find their own land. They hoped to find "New Sodom" after they got a quote from the Bible wrong. The two split up when Shelbyville wanted cousins to marry. Jebidiah wanted to find the town on Chastity, abstinence, and flavorless mush to which he called root-marm. Manhattan founded Shelbyville and Jebidiah founded Springfeld." Lisa quit reading.

"Didn't you say he once attacked George Washington?" Lisa put a finger to her lips.

"Shhh! I know. But I don't want everyone else to know. What he did was terrible but he's the pride of the town. I can't tell anyone."

"I guess it's better if people believe in the myth rather than the truth?" Lisa nodded.

"The legend of Jebidiah makes everyone happy. Springfield has had so many bad mistakes that just having this one thing that brings everyone together is worth it even if it's a lie." Lisa said. The three of them checked out a few more exhibits in the museum, including the small meteor that almost destroyed Spingfield.

"So what was it like kissing Nelson?" Allison asked. Lisa's heart jumped at that. How did she find out? She looked at her shocked.
"You're wondering how I figured out, right? A girl knows."

"You're going to need to be clearer than that." Lisa replied.

"I heard Nelson talking to himself about it at school." Lisa faleplamed thinking how stupid Nelson could be at times.

"Nelson and Lisa sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G." Samantha said playfully.

"It was just a little kiss, okay. A spur of the moment type thing. Besides, it didn't go anywhere. Nelson and I are too different." Lisa said trying to look confident, tough it wasn't really good. She was sure she was over Nelson, wasn't she? While looking at some exhibits Lisa thought she saw a familiar blonde girl in the background. A familiar girl from a pageant. When she turned her head though she was gone. Lisa rubbed it off and figured her mind was playing tricks. The girls then came to a part of a train.