You Are Lisa Simpson

Paging Dr. Weber

Homer's day finally ended has he got in his car. He threw out a radioactive rod out the window as he went down the road. "How do those always get on me? I won't even work in that station anymore." Homer said to himself. He drove and parked and entered Moes. He saw the usual gang there and sat down. 

"Hey, Homer. The usual?" Moe asked cleaning a glass.

"Yep, I'm gonna need it in a few minutes. Have you seen Lenny and Carl?"

"Nah, I'm guessing you're expecting them?"

"Yep, I gotta tell them something important. You might wanna hear it too. Though you might not wanna be my friend afterword."

"Why not?" Moe gave Homer a Duff.

"Well, you see Luke..." Homer was cut off when Lenny and Carl entered the bar. Moe talked to them to see what they wanted. Homer knew this was now or never. He knew they may not wanna be his friends anymore. But hey, they would still have each other, right. They did seem to hang out... a lot even for best friends. Both of them sat down by Homer and started drinking.

"So, Homer" Carl asked. "What is it you wanna tell us?" The three of them and a few others who were eavesdropping turned their heads to Homer. He was silent for a moment a little scared to talk.

"We're waiting" Lenny said. "Don't tell me you're drunk already" Homer took a breath and looked and the three.

"Okay, you see, it's actually about Luke. He's always been rather quiet and never had many friends. Marge has always wondered why. Now I always thought there was never a proplem and that she was paranoid. Marge always questions my logic like that time I jumped Springfield Gorge or that time I.."

"Homer get to the point!" Lenny spat.

"Oh, right. Luke told me he wants to be a girl. That he's always felt this way and hates his body. Now he's going by Lisa and female pronouns. I'm using the preferred pronouns and calling her Lisa now. It still breaks my heart though that I'm losing my boy." Moe, Carl, and Lenny all looked at Homer surprised. Some of the other people in the bar looked at him in disapproval that he let his son be a girl. 

"Geez. And I thought being the ugliest man in town was hard." Moe said. "If you wanna know what I think well I think you're a great father for letting Lisa be herself. It hurts to lose your boy but I'm sure Lisa's smile makes it better."

Homer smiled a little at that. "Yeah, it does. She told me how she loves me when I told her I'll be there for her."

"Good for you, Homer." This one came from Carl. "If anything I now think highly of you than I did 5 minutes ago. And that approval of you wasn't much."

"Lisa's a good kid, Homer. Despite this you're making all kinds of new memories with her. And one day if she's lucky you'll be walking her down the aisle.">

"What do grocery stores have to do with this?" Homer asked.

"I think he means at a wedding, Homer." Moe intertwined. Homer was still wrapping his head around Lisa marrying a man and being a wife. The other people in the bar grunted and left. "Ignore them. They're just to blind to see what it means to be a true father."

"Thanks, guys. Marge said I need to hold onto Lard Lad until later and focus on Lisa instead. So I need to stay at the plant."

"We'll here for you, pal" Moe told Homer. "All of us" Lenny and Carl nodded at this. Homer and the gang raised their glasses and had a few more beers. After a while Homer decided to go home. Moes phone rang before he left.

"Hello. Yeah sure. I'm looking for Amanda Kismieas. Is there Amanda Kismias here?" Everyone laughed and Moe got it. He didn't want a man to kiss his ass. Laughing was also heard on the phone. "I'll find you one day you hear that. And when I do you are gonna wish you were never born."