rainbows

twenty one

"C'mon you're probably hungry." He says startling me by grabbing my arm as we start moving in the opposite direction.

"He's nice." I find myself speaking as we pass an old couple which oddly reminds me of Lexi and WAIT! she's on a date she's with a guy eating and laughing somewhere alone, Pretty sure that's how these things work, not that I would know off. Guess it'll probably go fine, it's Lexi we're talking about.

"Yeah, he is." Ryan agrees

"But he can be a little, you know," I say with a chuckle. He's quite for a few steps. Maybe eight, nine. And then he nods signalling me that he gets it.

We walk in silence, I'm highly aware of his rough hand on my arm, my eyes linger on his hand I shift my gaze to look back at the road but somewhere in between our eyes meet. He rubs circles on my arm before pulling his hand away, the skin under his hold is hit with cold air making me feel numb.

"I have a question for you." Ryan speaks up

"Shoot," I say. I'm genuinely curious what is it that he wants to ask me. We take a right turn, I don't ask him where we are going, I trust him, at least when it comes to this.

"Bean bag or hammock?" He asks. His question makes me stop in my tracks.

"What?" I ask thinking I heard him wrong.

"You heard what I said." He says.

"Bean bag, they're comfortable" I shrug. "Why?" I ask

"I don't know. You've been pretty reserved the few days we went together to places so I guess it's just me, trying to get you to open up to me or something." He says scratching the back of his neck.

Okay, I wasn't expecting that. "Why now?" I cock my eyebrow. He could've asked me the first day, it's not like I'm that bad. Okay, maybe I am.

"I was trying to give you time, to get comfortable." He starts staring deeply at me. I turn my head sideways, eye contacts are awkward.

"Why today?" I ask. This isn't making any sense.

"You weren't acting ..." he stops trying to find a civil way to say that I'm a bitch to my face. "Like a hard human. You were smiling, laughing and cursing."

"I'm always like that," I say. I'm like that with Lexi so yeah I'm always like that. Is he blind? I'm a bitch sometimes but not that many times.

"You don't get it." He shakes his head "You're like that with Lexi because you're comfortable with her. I was just waiting for you to get comfortable with me. I know it can be hard." He smiles reassuringly. I take in his words. I've been nothing but a rude girl to him. I think of the first night we met after school in front of the library. He was cocky and making jokes, maybe he tried to keep his real self to himself in order to make me feel comfortable and okay. He actually tried. I take a deep breath and look into his eyes, he did that to make me feel better. It's kind of him.

But I'm not going to say Thankyou, he did that himself, I didn't ask him to. So I simply drag him by his arm in the direction we were walking in and ask him "What about you? Bean bag or hammock?"

"Bed." He says recovering from my reaction. Probably wasn't expecting this.

"Wow." I roll my eyes.

"Small towns or big cities?" He asks.

"Are we playing 21 questions but with choices?" It's exciting though. Talking to someone about my choices even though they're illogical and won't make any change in our lives.

"You can say." He says.

"Big cities, they're far better than these shitty small towns. We miss so many things living here." It's true. I want to leave for college as soon as possible. If you get into it rings in my head but I push the voice deep inside my skull.

He hums. I notice that he isn't answering the questions. We enter the same cafe that I bumped into him in the morning a few days maybe weeks ago. It feels like a lifetime since that happened.

"What about you?" I ask

"I'm not going to tell you my choices. I waited far too long to make you talk to me. Really talk to me."

"Fair." I roll my eyes. I owe him. It's the least I can do. I take a seat while he goes away to order something. For once I have some money with me right now, don't want to look like a broke bitch to him. Not that he would judge or anything, I just don't like it. I'm quite surprised that he waited for so long, but to ask these stupid questions? There's something he's leaving out but honestly, I don't give a fuck.

"Violin or acoustic guitar?" He asks sliding down onto the chair opposite to me.

"Acoustic guitar," I say not telling the reason. If he isn't answering them I'm not telling the reason. I hate violins though, the screeching sounds they make, a horror to my ears.

He doesn't ask for one and changes to a different question "Summer or Winter?"

"Winter," I reply without thinking. How do people even like summer? All you do is sweat and smell bad.

"Paperback or hardcover?"

"Paperback."

"Soft music or pop music?"

"Depends." I lean into my chair. I don't have a real answer to that.

"On what?"

"My mood." A girl on the road holds my gaze through the window. She keeps on staring at me and I roll my eyes. Fucking kids.

"Okay." He drops his elbows on the table and leans towards me. "Ocean blue or forest green?"

I wasn't expecting a question to be a hard one but this one is asking me to think before I speak up. As if I was being given time somebody calls out for Ryan signalling whatever he ordered is ready. He gets up and I think about the question.

Blue is great, green is great. I can't choose between them. It's a tough one, I like both of them, even though I hate my last name I don't think it is a wise thing to not like the colour it is named after. That's absurd. I think of the ocean waves, they're calming, blue is calming while green, I think of forests and the animals that reside in it, is wild.
I don't know. I huff and think of answering Blue when Ryan comes. It isn't like he's asking for a reason or anything, and I can always blame it on my last name.

"Blue," I speak up the moment he slips into his chair.

He nods putting a fry in his mouth. I don't know what he does or says after that because all I am seeing for the next fifteen-twenty minutes is food.

A/N: Thank you for 100 followers! Aesthetic by dontbotherme15595 ✨