Home is Where you will Always Belong

Part 25

Two and a Half Months Later

Life for Peyton and Juice and their little family had gone on pretty much the way it had been since they moved into their new home a few months ago, except for a few minor things. Peyton's nightmares had continued and they kept getting worse and more vivid and more real. It was to the point where she was afraid to close her eyes at night for fear of what might be revealed to her in her sleep. Peyton had been hoping that the nightmares or flashbacks would go away on their own, but a month ago her and Juice decided that it was time for her to go back to her Psychiatrist and talk through it.

Juice had gone with her to a couple sessions, but today Peyton sat on the couch across from her doctor, alone, with her legs crossed underneath her. Juice had offered to come along, but she knew that he had a lot of club business to take care of so she told him that she would be ok.

"So, is there anything new today Peyton?" the doctor asked her. 

Peyton looked up at her doctor and bit her lip and shook her head.

"Nothing new really," Peyton replied quietly, "It's pretty much the same thing every night now since I saw you last Friday." 

"Can you go through it with me again?" the doctor asked, looking down at her notes, "I know it's tough, but I just need you to clarify it for me again." 

"I was on a lot of pain medication. It was supposed to just take the pain in my leg away and keep the pain in my head at bay," Peyton replied, looking down at her hands, "After about four days I started taking it to numb everything and help me to forget that he was even there with me. But there was that one night about two days before I packed up and left, that he raped me. He took advantage of me because he knew I wouldn't remember it. But like I told you last time, the last thing that appeared in my dream or flash back was him saying that the only thing that I would remember from that night was him getting me pregnant."

Peyton looked down at her little protruding belly and so did the doctor. 

"Do you think he was successful Peyton?" she asked, "Do you think those precious little babies are Justin's or Juice's?" 

"I don't know what I think anymore," Peyton mumbled, "At first I was 100% certain that these babies were Juice's, but now... The son of a bitch is dead and he is still managing to ruin my life."

Peyton put her head in her hands and let the hot tears flow through her fingers. The doctor got up and sat down beside Peyton and rubbed her back gently. 

"I want you to try and do something for me," she said quietly, "And I know that it will be a lot easier said than done." 

"What's that?" Peyton asked, sounding frustrated. 

"I want you to remember exactly what you just said," she replied, "Remember that Justin is dead. He can no longer hurt you. You can choose to let him hurt you or you can choose to free yourself from his ghost. Also, remember that you and Juice talked and that no matter what, those babies will only know Juice as a father and not Justin. Juice is going to love those babies as if they were his." 

"I understand what you're saying," Peyton replied, lifting her head up to look at the doctor, "But how do I keep myself from having these dreams or flashbacks or whatever they are? How do I stop them?"

Her doctor got up grabbed her prescription pad and wrote something down on it. 

"First, I want you to take one of these before bed every night for the next two weeks," she said handing her the prescription, "After that, try a night without it and if the nightmares come back try another couple nights and go from there. They are just a heavy duty sleeping pill that should help you sleep through the night without disruption. Next, I want you to try really hard to not give Justin another thought. If thoughts come up, just keep telling yourself that he is dead and he can't hurt you anymore."