FIRE & BLOOD • EVAN 'BUCK' BUCKLEY / 9-1-1

1.

Day one as a first-year surgical intern: It was not what I expected. When I walked through those doors of Griffith Park Memorial Hospital I was ecstatic. Eager to learn and ready to dive into it all. My first day ended with an 8 year old boy dying in my arms. It was the worst feeling not being able to save him. There was a drive by at a local grocery store and the little boy was there at the wrong time as the place was shot up. I had to lock myself in the bathroom as I cried on the floor for him. This wasn't what I signed up for. I questioned if I made the right choice in career.

Day five: Everything I knew about medicine was being questioned. My attending tested me. I felt confused and angry. It was hell. I honestly don't know what his problem is, always yelling at us like we're idiots. Maybe he should teach us instead of getting angry at us.

Day ten: Despite the rough days I wouldn't trade it for anything. I'm now realizing I was in a moment of weakness when I asked myself if I did the right thing going into medicine. I did make the right choice: this is my dream. Mistakes are made but today I saved a woman's life and her unborn baby. It was the best feeling in the world. There will always be rough days and good days.

Day thirty: I have been pushed to my limits. There's been talk around the hospital that I am seen as the star out of all the other interns and it's not sitting well with them. My attending has been picking me to watch his surgeries. I can sense the jealousy but this is what I worked for. I didn't spend countless nights studying and putting my all through medical school to be average.

(Current day) Day sixty two, I'm working a 36 hour shift. It is hour 15. I have been assigned to assist in the E.R. This place is hectic tonight. Patients continue rushing in through those doors and I have lost count of how many. It was at 20:47p.m. when the burn patient was brought in.

"Coming through! Young female in her early forties. Her body is covered in third degree burns!"

"She isn't breathing. I'm starting compressions! Mary stay with me okay? Stay with me!" A firefighter is on top of the patient, his back facing me so I can't see his face. I watch with wide eyes as they rush through those doors, firefighter on top of the patient starting compressions as they work their way through the crowded room. I'm supposed to be checking on Mr. Harrison, an 80 year old man who was admitted for respiratory problems but I can't tear my eyes away from the patient named Mary. I need to get on the case. Gigi, who became my best friend during my first week here at the hospital, is trying to grab my attention.

"Stella!!! Mr. Harrison is complaining that his chest-"
"Here" I hand her Mr. Harrison's chart before walking away. There's so much commotion. I weave through all the nurses and patients. I receive death glares from some of the nurses. I ignore them. All I'm focused on is making it to Mary. I want in on the case. My attending, Dr. Russell, is one of the surgeons assisting Mary, he's trying to calm down the firefighter who is refusing to stop compressions. Dr. Russell's sharp jaw clenches and his lips pull into a tight line. He's angry but he's trying to contain himself though it's obvious he's ready to slam this guy into a wall.

"Russell. How can I help?" I call out to my attending.
"You can help by first getting this stubborn firefighter off my patient!" Russells deep husky voice booms through the E.R causing some of the nurses to turn their heads. That's not what I wanted to hear. I wanted him to tell me how he needs me to scrub in immediately or something that'll get me pumped because today has not been the greatest day. Not for me to babysit a firefighter. "Dr. Forbes, Dr. Diaz and I will continue to help Mary. We need to get her into the O.R now! MOVE!" Russell screams to all the people blocking their way to the elevator. Russell shoots me a cold glare as I stand there wondering how the hell I'm going get this huge man off his patient.

"Don't just stand there Moore, GET THIS MAN OFF MY PATIENT BEFORE I DO!"

Fuck. I can't stand when Russell gets loud. There is a patient who needs immediate surgery and I'm standing here like an idiot so I can understand why he's mad but it isn't pleasant when my attending starts screaming at me.

"Umm sir I need you to come with me. Please" I try reaching for the firefighters shoulder but he shoves me away, he doesn't even bother looking at me. Today has been a long day and it's no where close to being over, I am not in the mood for a stubborn firefighter refusing to listen to me. I attempt again. He's preventing us from doing our job but he doesn't seem to see it that way. His job ends at the door. We've had plenty of paramedics, EMTs, firefighters who don't understand when their job here is done.

"Excuse me! I need you to get off the patient NOW and let us do our job!!"

"I'm not leaving her" he says in almost a whisper, his arms continuing to work not once stopping compressions.

"But you need to or she will die."

His motions stop. I hear him sigh before he finally agrees to let the doctors take over. My breathe stops as he turns to face me. Everything else around us becomes a blur and I forget about Mary as Russell rushes her down the hall and disappears around the corner. Shit. This can't be happening. I know exactly who this firefighter is, his face was too pretty to forget.

Before I left Siesta Key to begin a new life here in California I went to one last huge party. I figured what better way out than going to a part hosted by only one of the most known play boys of Siesta Key, Thomas Sommers. He was loaded and had a huge mansion right on the beach. I'm pretty sure most of Siesta Key was there and even others from the outside. I ended up hooking up with a guy I had met there and he's standing right in front of me. The images take over my brain as we stand in the middle of the E.R processing this moment. I start to relive that night, remembering every little detail. I see small flashes from our hook up. His naked body over me. That small chain... the sweat... the heat.. those lips making their way down my stomach causing my stomach to flutter as he got closer to the foreign land between my legs. Bad time to be doing this.

Why is he here? I wasn't expecting to see him again after that night. A fun night it was but it should've ended there. I never caught his came and I don't give one night stands the pleasure of knowing mine. Names weren't important at the time in my opinion.

"Siesta Key?" He finally comes to the realization of where he has seen me from. I'm sure he goes through a different girl every week and he forgot about me the second I left that mansion. He has the face of a player but I didn't care that night. I was drunk and he was hot. I can't imagine what my face looks like right now. My cheeks are probably a light shade of pink right now. Without saying a word I rush past my one night stand.