Before I Go || L.H

0.3

*Edited*

|| S ||

⠀⠀My eyes slowly open, slightly puffy and my head having a slight pain from the previous actions that happened. I blink a few times, getting use to the bright light of the hospital room. A few voices whisper around my body laying in the uncomfortable hospital bed. My vision becomes clear and I see Jennifer speaking to my parents at the end of the bed. My throat is dry and I feel as if I have no control over my body.

"W-What's going on?" I ask, my voice is raspy.

"Oh great, You're awake" Jennifer says.

⠀⠀I nod and let out a loud cough. I Start to cough continuously and my mum hands me a cup of water by the bed. I look at Jennifer and she looks at my parents then back to me. I'm confused.

"Well we took a few more tests while you were sleeping. And the pains you've been having and the amount of weight you're losing so quickly is something...not so good" She explains.

"What is it?"

"Selena we found a brain tumor in your x-rays, it wasn't as noticeable before, but the new pains in your head made us want to know what was going on."

⠀⠀My face is plain and I don't move. Im completely shocked. Why? Why me? What is going to happen to me?

"We can try chemo again and prescribe you more pain pills to make it easier. At this rate it's all or nothing"

⠀⠀I nod and so many thoughts go through my mind.

"C-Can I go home soon?" Is all I ask.

⠀⠀Jennifer sighs and looks down. She nods and leaves the room to let me talk to my parents. They say nothing to me and I say nothing to them. First cancer and now a tumor. My parents must love having a cursed child. We leave after an hour of going over different medications, and doing chemo therapy. We sign some paper work and leave. My mum pushes me out in a wheelchair. I can barley stand.

⠀⠀We arrive home and my dad carries me to my room. I don't weight much. I was 140 pounds before I was diagnosed. I only weight 103 pounds now, but not in a good way. I don't look like a normal healthy girl. My parents leave my room and I curl up in my bed. A few tears slide down my cheeks as I think to myself about more pain i'll have to endure until I finally die. I shut my eyes and slowly cry myself to sleep.

***

⠀⠀School hasn't been successful at all today. Throughout my day all I get are terrible pains everywhere. I tell Caroline about the tumor in my head. She's in a state of shock that all she repeats is that it'll be okay. She cries and I cry with her. I hate the things that happen to me and I wish everything would just end now. The bell rings and I wipe my tears.

"It'll be okay" I tell her, another tear sliding down my cheek.

⠀⠀She nods and I give her a hug. I grab my things and walk to choir class. I barley make it, seeing as I got very dizzy in the hallway. I sit in my seat and let out a sigh. Mrs.Monroe walks in smiling.

"Alright everyone remember your songs are due today at the end of class. You can drop your papers in the bin by the door on your way out" She tells us.

⠀⠀For the rest of the class period we sing songs from the 90's. Mrs. Monroe was really fun and energetic during these times. As I sing, I make sure to keep my voice quieter than usual. A few people stare at me, but then look away. The bell rings and people begin to leave, putting their songs in the bin. I pull the CD out with my lyrics and place it in the bin after everyone else leaves. I walk to my locker. As I open my locker I feel something. No, not something. Someone. A pair of hands cover my eyes.