Before I Go || L.H

3.9

Luke's P.O.V

Once again I laid in my bunk, staring at up. Thinking about things that probably didn't matter now. It's been five days since I saw her again.

Once we arrived back at the bus I cried for hours. I barley ate for the first two days, and now I'm not eating at all. She had this affect on me somehow. I needed her with me to make me feel alive. I just felt so miserable and alone now.

"Luke, come on mate you need to get out" Calum's voice startled me.

"I'm fine" I lied.

"No you're not Luke, you haven't even eaten for three days and you haven't even gotten out of bed to take a shower" He replied.

I didn't say anything and he groaned, walking away. I let out a breath of relief. A few minutes later I heard more footsteps. Then I was being pulled out of bed.

"Come on Luke" Ashton groaned.

"No!" I whined, trying to hold onto something.

They continued to pull on me until I fell out of my bunk. Before I could run, the grabbed me and pulled me to the back of the bus where the showers where. Ashton turned the water on and they pushed me under the shower head.

"Oi Luke you smell" Michael groaned.

The poured soap on me and sprayed water in my face. I looked up at them.

"Get yourself together mate, she doesn't want to see us, and its just a girl, get over it" Ashton yelled at me.

"What happens when she actually does die? Are you going to be depressed forever? You can't let one girl make you like this" Michael told me.

Calum stayed silent and looked away. They all looked at me before walking away. Leaving me in the shower.

I eventually got up and washed myself. I felt guilty for making them so upset, and making my fans sad because of my mood. I knew I had to try and pull myself together, but it was so hard.

I changed into sweatpants and walked to the bunks. They weren't here. I wasn't surprised. I knew they wouldn't want to be stuck here with a boring, depressed person. I went back into my bunk and grabbed my phone and headphones. I tried to listen to some of my favorite bands to get her off my mind. But it didn't work.

I sighed and opened my phone and went to photos. I had went through all my photos and made an album with just pictures of Selena. All of the pictures brought back memories and tears to my eyes. She was so happy. I was so happy. And now she's gone and I'm a wreck. Why did this have to happen?

The bus doors opening made me jump and I quickly locked my phone. My three best mates walked in with Maccas in their hands. Calum handed me a bag and a soda. I was about to decline, but Calum cut me off.

"Please, you need to eat Luke" He spoke, his voice cracking a bit.

I sighed and took the bag from him. I ate the fries and felt full, but I knew they wouldn't let me waste the rest. I finally finished the food and they smiled at me. One by one they hugged me.

"We're just worried about you Luke" Ashton whispered as he hugged me.

Our hug fest was interrupted by Harry walking in.

"Do you have your things ready?" He asked.

"Yeah why?" Michael asked.

"We're heading to California, yesterday was our last day, we're leaving in ten minutes" He explained and walked off.

I sighed and looked down.

"You can sleep now Luke" Ashton told me.

I pursed my lips and nodded.

We were leaving. Now there was no chance of me ever seeing her again. I had one chance to get her again and it slipped through my fingers. I hated myself right now.

Selena's P.O.V

I woke up to the soft voice of my nurse. I slowly opened my eyes and she gave me a big smile.

"Sorry to wake you Selena, but Doctor Alborn said she wanted me to take you to room 539 for X-Rays" She explained to me.

"X-Rays? For what?" I asked her.

"I'm not sure dear, but you can sleep right through them if you're still tired" She smiles.

I nodded and she helped me get up from my bed. We slowly made our way to the elevator and then to room 539.

Ever since I got here they wouldn't allow me to leave because they wanted to know the cause of me passing out. I told them it was nothing, that I just fainted, but they didn't believe me.

"Alright Selena, just lay here and the doctor will start the X-Rays" My nurse informed me.

I nodded, already knowing how X-Rays were taken. I laid down and shut my eyes. Falling back to sleep.

***

I woke up back in my original hospital room. I yawned and stretched my arms then looked around. It was so boring here. Nothing to do at all. I began to hum a song I absolutely loved ever since I heard it in HotTopic at the mall in London.

"She said to me,
Forget what you thought,
Cause good girls are bad girls,
That haven't been caught..."

I softly sang, trying to remember the whole song. The only bad thing was that this song reminded me about him. I didn't want to miss him, but I did. I couldn't help myself though.

"Selena" A voice startled me.

I looked over to see Doctor Alborn. She had a pale face.

"Oh hi, I didn't see you there" I mumbled.

She cleared her throat.

"I saw your X-Rays and found out what happened in the alley.." She trailed off. "I'm so sorry Selena"

"Please don't pity me" I softly spoke.

"I'm sorry" She spoke. "Have you ever thought about chemo?" She asked.

"I did when I was fifteen, but stopped then started again, got surgery and it came back" I told her.

"Well if you try again maybe-" I cut her off.

"Don't you get it, I stopped because it's a sign, it's my fate, this is suppose to happen" I told her.

"No Selena it isn't"

"Yes it is! No matter what you say I'm not changing my mind, I'll die young, but I'll die happy" I told her.

She pursed her lips and nodded.

"Okay then" She whispered.

"How long?" I asked.

"How long till what?" She asked.

"Till I die"

"Not long at all, perhaps a month or less" She replied.

"One more thing" I spoke. " Can you get me some paper, pens and envelopes please?" I asked

She nodded and left the room.

I knew that if I was going to be dying soon I couldn't just leave without one last goodbye. Even if it was just a letter. Doctor Alborn came back with pens, paper and envelopes a few minutes later. I thanked her and placed a piece of paper on the hard table I ate on. I sighed. I'll start with Cher first.

Dear Cher,
You've been my best friend forever and always will be. I'm sorry I had to end it this way though. I'm going to die and I wanted to let you know I'm sorry. But, Before I go....

~*~*~*~

I updated again. Yay? Omg I'm almost done with this story.

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Since I'm almost done with this story, please leave any suggestions of any other kind of story you want me to write, or maybe I'll use you as the character. Bleh Idk. But I'll update again.

-Aussie_Arses