Tales of the Broken

Hate Mail, Jealousy and Pride

From: Anonymous

So this begins awkwardly by me saying, I have two sets of friends. One that i hangout at home in our neighborhood, i knew them since i was little, like four-year-old little and the ones at school, your typical school friendship circle.

The reason why this story is called what the title is called is because i did receive hate mails from my own friends when i was thirteen. Why you may ask? Because of a guy that i used to like when i was around that age. I did not only receive hate mails... This person that claimed to be my friend all those years ago, she hated me to a personal level to the point where i could not understand why she was doing it anymore. Now that's been said, i am gonna give the full story, a very straightforward one this time with no sugarcoats!

I already mentioned this all started about me telling them about this boy i like at school. One of my those girls i used to be friends with her brother and me are in the same class together. He's friends with that guy i like so sometimes he visits him in his house. Boy, i would get so flustered whenever he comes for a visit and my heart skips a beat, it's like... I wasn't myself at all those times whenever i see this guy. Since i came from the philippines and i was born, raised, and went to school there, we knew many gangster words. My classmates called this guy "Pare Koi" now, dont ask me what it means in english, i dont know and im sorry 😂

So Pare Koi went to pay (im gonna call one of the girls Sarai, just to give her a name but obviously that is not her real name) Sarai's brother a visit, i already told this guy to my friends and how i like him. All of us were so childish back then that we were making such a ruckus for him to notice me, even my friends were yelling. One of the other girls (we going to call her Alyn) Alyn, she saw him for the first time, i dont remember how she reacted to it but she said he's cute. So that thing happened and it dragged on every time "Pare Koi" would come over.

A month later or maybe three weeks later, Alyn started fighting with me. She was pissed for no reason, in one day she turned from being my friend to a total bitchy drag queen. I tried to reason with her but she did not want to listen to me. And then when she reached her limit she pushed me on the side of the road and with her dog beside her (she knows i'm scared of dogs) she told me "you better get your face out of here, im gonna feed you to my dogs you wretch!" That time i couldnt tell what was her deal but as i grew older, i realized she was jealous of me. I didnt know why, i never asked her, i tried, she just let out so much spite i wanted to just say fuck it and just go home. It was out of nowhere that she threw a fit and started terrorizing me. She even got our other friends to side with her so i was alone like how i am everyday at school because of all the bullying. The day it happened i went home, laid in bed, with all the lights off and cried my eyes out playing just a sad music about loneliness.

One day, one of the girls came to me, her name is Mica, she gave me a letter. I asked her what's this? And she just said it's from her sister and that she wants me to read it. I read it and it was a hate mail. Here's what it says from what i remember:

Dear ___,

Please don't ever show me your face ever again, you know that i really hate you and you do not deserve to be my friend. You like that guy? I bet you he wont even come to like you because you are just not that good looking. In short terms, you are ugly, just stop trying.

- Alyn

I was broken obviously, it's like all my happiness got taken from me and i never felt so alone. No friends, just a grandma who won't ever listen to my problems and all she says is "just ignore them". Grandma you don't know my pain, dont tell me like you dont know. I tried going to one of the other girls' house, her name is Joyce. I knocked on Joyce's gate for a long time and when she answered she finally told me she can't let me in because Alyn told me not to let you in. I was like "really she became that petty?" But i didnt care i just told her I'll just go home. But she let me in eventually and she just didn't tell Alyn anything.

The fight dragged on for at least a week and during those times when i would just go out, the moment they see my face, they start telling at me and calling me out. Calling me names and the typical shit like "hey ugly where you going!?" All that childish stuff. I tried to endure all that stuff and not let it affect me, but it does hurt deep down. I was being bullied at school and now at home because of this stupid guy. Alyn even got the other girls to send me hate mail too and my grandparents would give them to me.

I was at the point where i didn't want to be friends anymore with everyone because i was so fed up with it. All i did was cry and asked myself what did i do to deserve this and when will it be over. I never told anybody what i was going through because nobody would listen to me, not even my family. Alyn also told me i had the nerve to show up to her school two weeks ago that time and she added that none of her classmates even liked me and that i was ugly as fuck. I paid her a visit because i was in the area and she is my friend. I was just trying to be nice.

After a month the fight eventually stopped, she stopped sending me hate mails and she apologized. I felt like the apology wasn't enough after everything she did. But i just accepted her apology because i hate drama and i just want to be done with it. After all of that Alyn just continued being friends with me and acts like she never ever did me wrong and i was always her "friend". I never told her about any guys i like anymore at school because i just couldn't trust her that she won't do that anymore.

When i left to immigrate to another country, Alyn and the other girls except for one never talked to me anymore. Even though i considered them as my best friends for life no matter how far. They would message me but they would just ask about some cute or handsome guys like they sound so desperate to date other races. I feel like they only come to me when they need something.

Eventually i stopped messaging them and i dont consider them as my friends anymore.