Tales of the Broken

The Verbally Abusive Stepfather

From: Anonymous

In my previous submission, i talked about Diane and her atrocities towards me and how she plagued my mom's brain, now that subject changes. I am going to talk about her brother this time, and we will call him by the name Julius for confidentiality as usual. What did this man do to belong in this story? Well... to tell you the truth, he did a lot of things, his atrocities is just as bad as his own sister but if i were to compare he is by far the ugliest, disgusting and the worst man i have ever seen in my life, and to think that this man is my brother's dad.

Julius is 100% a hypocrite on every person he meets, he treats them nicely, he is hospitable and has mannerisms... Only if he likes you as a person though, if he finds even the tiniest of detail that he dislikes about you even though it is not true and he is misunderstanding it, he will be that person who will ride his high horse and talk about you to his family behind your back like wildfire. To other people, he was always deemed as a nice person but i am by far the very first person who will object to that bullshit. My uncle, his wife and his sons think this man is such a holy saint and he probably does it for a good reason on why he dislikes me because I might be the problem.

If you guys are reading this no he is fucking not. I am about to tell you what this man did to me and the toll it took on me physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually; since none of you all would believe me, and you did not listen to whatever words i said 4 years ago. I don't understand what my mom finds in this man that is "lovable" in her eyes.

So... i already wrote about how his sister and some parts of his family spreads rumors bout me like wildfire, well it's not only that that put my own sanity to the test with these people. It was like the year 2015 and it's been two years since my brother was born, Julius already heard plentiful about me and my "bad deeds" he obviously hates me. I was not surprised because it is written across his face, same goes for Diane too, so i guess his huge pool of hatred for me led him to verbally abuse me because i was just a regular person trying to live my life and was trying to find peace among all the chaos these people brought up. I guess that's what i deserved for trying to be friendly to a potential family member that i will have to deal with for the rest of my life??

The verbal abuse started with just a simple lecture of "do not make food late at night please, we are trying to sleep and it's hard to put your brother to sleep. Eat earlier if you could". First of all who in their right mind anyway would ditch their own bedroom to sleep near the kitchen? Like yes to each their own but if you care about your sleep I would bring my brother upstairs no matter how complicated he gets about it.

Anyway, I was able to make something to eat, I got caught up gaming with my friends that's why I missed dinner at an earlier time, no biggie right? But then after that things just got worse and worse, it came to the point where he would get mad all over the place when i am just trying to cook a meal for myself. He would tell me stuff every time he sees me like:

"when are you going to get a job? You don't even contribute anything here, you dont ever do anything, you dont clean the house, you dont even check the mail, cook rice for us when you know we come home from work tired, you are just in your room doing i dont know what all day"

"if it was up to me I would have kicked your ass out of this house a long time ago. you would be on the streets, homeless, with nowhere to go."

"What did i tell you about making food late at night?! You never listened to the things I said the first time? *trying so hard not to say get out of my house*"

After hearing him say those things to me over and over i realized he does not want me in his sights at all, i wanted to avoid him at all costs so i dont create any problems so i started locking the door to my room and i would refuse to come out whenever him, my mom, his family member that he invites and my brother are all at home. I did not eat, all i drank was water, and at night whenever my mom and him would go to work and take my brother to his aunt's place i would come downstairs and start cooking the first meal im eating for the day. I would stay up all night and when its about 3-4 hours before they come home I would cook a ton of food for myself for the rest of my meals and pack them in take out boxes with take out utensils because i cannot really afford to wash anything and I throw it out the following night in our dumpster whenever they are sleeping. It also came to the point where even if they are sleeping on their days off and they stay home, I would open a can of tuna and eat cold rice (sometimes ice cold, straight from the fridge) because I was just that hungry and i would sneak it in my room. I would use our silver wares whenever i eat on their days off late at night and i would sneak the dish soap as quietly as i can upstairs and wash it in my bathroom sink and return it on the sink and the plates and silverware in the dish rack quietly. Sometimes i do end up having spoiled food since i dont have a mini fridge in my room so i just end up throwing those out and starve myself until i get another chance to eat.

Everyday would always try to check if i am clear to go out of my bedroom with all my guard up even if its just me trying to use the bathroom or taking a shower because i do not ever want to see him, and if he sees me he's going to drill those stupid words in my head again; I developed that constant fear of him spitting those words out of his mouth whenever he would see me. I only showered late at night or when it was clear for me to get out of my room, I try to sneak every time i try to leave my room because i did not want to be spotted by any of them even though they are aware of my presence in the house. He would still lecture me even if i just wanted to go out on a date with my boyfriend, always the same stuff. One time he got mad at me for talking back at him which made me terrified, he claimed me to be a disrespectful and ungrateful human being. Things did not get better when my grandfather moved in with us and my mom putting all the burden on me of taking care of him.

One after another though. It's not just food anymore too, laundry got included in the pile now as well. I can't even do laundry without him or my mom complaining, I can't believe she was all in on this too. He would still say the same things to me if he catches me doing laundry at night because our washer and dryer gets really noisy. If its not the laundry, its my best friend that just wants to hangout with me, and those were the only  times i got to eat too is when i go out with friends, I try so hard not to show them that I am a starving person going through stuff at home because i did not wanna trouble anybody, but even Julius got mad at me for trying to open the garage late at night just so I could hangout with my best friend and get some food at Jack in the Box. I had to tell my best friend that night to just go home and not worry about me, and that we will hangout next time and that i'll be fine... Deep down I did not want him to leave, i was desperate to get out and eat, i went back up to my room and explained everything to him and starved till morning came and found an opportunity to eat.

Eventually i told my grandma, my aunt and my cousin about it, they got upset and told me to ignore him, put some headphones on and crank up the volume of my music to the point where i cant hear him and eat, if i don't eat anything it will take a toll on me later. They said this  because only my mom has the say on whether to kick me out or keep me, not him. Little you guys know... It's not what you are thinking... You don't understand what I am going through, not even my other side of the family could help me. For the first time in my life i felt all alone with nobody beside me to even enlighten me.

I found out way later that he has been verbally abusing me behind my mom's back. And I told her eventually too... She never helped me, from the looks of her face she will never intend to because she does not want problems for herself.

I did this to myself for about three years in total. The thing that shocked me the most is when i visited my doctor the following year that came, he told me from all my physical and vitals test that I take every year, he is concerned because my weight fluctuated down to 130 pounds. I tried to pretend nothing was wrong but eventually I told him what was happening. He asked me to go see a therapist and talk about the stuff that happens to me at home, he was concerned about my well-being and the path that I was taking with myself. He told me I would need to eat and pick myself up because my ordeal comes with serious consequences. I wish it was that easy doc. My mom was very worried about me, but i couldn't even tell if she cares or not because she always had no say towards it. I forced myself to disregard it because complaining to her will never make things any better.

Months later that day and moment came that my best friend and his girlfriend got an apartment, they wanted to take me in so I could move out because they knew about my situation. His girlfriend thinks nobody should have to go through that. After we talked about everything on the process of moving in, I finally made my decision to tell my mom that I am moving out. To my surprise, she never said anything but a few words: "It's your choice, you are old enough" I feel like she never even cared so i just went about my way and started packing. The sooner i get out the better. I got a job eventually though to support myself thanks to my best friend again since he recommended me a place while he was helping me job hunt.

The day I moved out, i never looked at him, i didn't want to... But i can see the happiness across his face knowing i will be forever out of his hair and he can have my mom all to himself. Moving out with my best friends was the best decision i ever made for myself and i wont ever change anything if i were to go back in time. I am forever grateful of them taking me in to their home and moved me out of my situation until i was good enough to leave California and split ways with them to carve my own path with my boyfriend, soon to be husband.