drowning (DISCONTINUED)

Chapter 9

Taehyungs POV

why are they trying to get me to tell them everything?
to make fun of you idiot.
oh

"you guys don't need to worry about me i have everything under control. i'm taking care of myself." i state even though i'm trying to shake as they all glare at me with a look telling me they know i'm lying.

as namjoon was about to speak yoongi hyung interrupted.

"bull crap"

"excuse me?" i ask him getting a little angry about how everyone is now paying attention to me and how yoongi is treating me.

"bull crap! you look horrible taehyung! do you even realize how skinny you are? your making us worried  because from what namjoon told us it sounds like you get no sleep. i don't even remember the last time we had a meal together. i don't remember the last time you came to us about your problems or the last time you changed your clothes in front of us. tae we care for you, why won't you let us help you?" yoongi says, his voice sounding desperate at the end. like desperate to get me back.

everyone is now looking at yoongi. we sat in silence until
chaos happened.

"yoongi why would you yell at him like that?"
"i'm worried about him!"
"that's not reason for you to yell!"
"you were probably going to yell anyways you always do!"
yoongi and jin fight back and forth.

namjoon and jungkook look like there about to throw hands at each other for some reason.

and jimin is calming down and distressed hoseok.
i'm starting to get mad at everyone.
mad at everything.
mad at me.

"EVERY SINGLE PERSON SIT DOWN AND BE QUITE UNTIL I MAKE YOU!" i yell over everyone making everyone stop and look at me with wide eyes, following my instructions immediately.

"please just calm down i'm fine" i say calmly.

"i don't believe you." jimin says, breaking my heart as my best friend and my first crush doesn't even think i'm telling the truth.

how come they can see right through me?
why can't it go back to the way it was before?
i've been like this for two years yet there only paying attention now. i think i'm too far gone now to be saved now.

everyone stays silent after that until jungkook speaks.

"hyung we can clearly see somethings wrong... the other might have not noticed but i've seen you get worse over the past few months... please tell us... we won't make fun of you..." jungkook says as everyone looks at him then back at me with a nod.

i sigh
i'm not telling them
i can't
i don't want my family to hate me too
everyone already does

"as i said before nothing is wrong. besides i cope with my emotions another way that is non-harmful." i let the last part slip out of my mouth before i could stop myself.

but now that i think about it i would love to cuddle with my stuff animals and watch paw portal...

ah. stop. your not a baby and you never will be.
stupid little space.