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-RIVER-

I've been laying on this uncomfortable moldy couch for the last four hours staring at the chipped ceiling. Her words and actions replayed like a broken record in my head - over and over- driving me fucking insane.

She flinched away from me three times tonight, I saw the fear in her eyes. She was terrified but she didn't show it, the only reason I knew was because I've grown used to the look in her eyes. I've seen it hundreds of times before.

I couldn't figure out why seeing it on her face was different. It did something to me and it made me feel a ache deep inside of me in a place I forgot existed.

When you belong to a gang you're forced to make the difficult decisions, they train you to shut off your emotions and to become numb when you pull the trigger or snap someone's neck. If you don't learn they beat it in to you until you would rather die.

It's been almost five years since I've felt any emotion aside from rage, but being with her was causing something to stir in me.

I thought I could handle this job but I'm starting to realize that I can't. Having to keep an eye on her is one of the hardest things I've had to do. She's intriguing and that's dangerous for me. I know she's curious and she'll get herself in trouble.

I don't want her to get involved in the gang. She's to innocent for the things we do. She wouldn't last a day, she would hate us, hate me if she knew the truth.

A scream pulls me out of my thoughts as I shoot off the couch. I grab my gun and run towards the back room, I push open the door and aim at... nothing.

There was nobody here.

Where the fuck did she go?

I heard whimpering coming from the closet. I put my gun in the back of my pants and pull open the closet door. She was curled up with her knees pulled to her chest. Her hair was matted to her head and her eyes were glassy. There weren't any tears, but I knew she was terrified. Her eyes were hollow and empty.

I crouch down and get to her level before reaching out to her. She flinches away and squeezes her eyes shut as more whimpers leave her mouth.

"Princess it's just me" I whisper to her

She slowly flutters her eyes open and looks up at me.

"R-River?"

I nod my head and reach out to her again, this time she doesn't flinch away. I sit down next to her on the floor and wrap my arm around her body before pulling her into my chest.

"I-I'm sorry I w-woke you" she mumbles as her body shakes

"You didn't princess, it's ok"

She unwraps herself and lays her head on my chest, nuzzling deep into my neck as her arms go around my torso.

Shit.

This wasn't supposed to be happening.

Her body trembled as she lay wrapped in my arms. I didn't know what to do.

I should've been in here with her. I shouldn't have left her alone in a strange place in the middle of the woods.

What the fuck was I thinking?

After what Carter said at the race I shut my mind off, I wasn't going to let him control me like that. He knew what to say to piss me off and it worked, I shut her out and that wasn't part of the plan.

If this was going to work I needed to do my job properly, I need to get her to trust me and being a dick towards her isn't going to do that.

I really needed a cigarette right now.

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