Romanogers Stories

Love Me Anyway

A/N: This song is the inspiration for this one!

As we danced arm in arm, chest to chest, there was still a tiny speck of doubt wriggling in the back of my mind, telling me this wouldn't last, despite the rings tying us together. After everything I'd done, I couldn't help but think this was all a joke, some sort of sick, twisted mind game of the Red Room. There was no way this could be happening. I wasn't allowed happiness, love. It was all weakness. No matter how much I've changed since the Red Room, the rules, the pain, the guilt, it never leaves. But then I think about all we've been through together. We were perfect for each other. We understood one another, so he wouldn't leave me, right?

"I can feel you thinking, Nat," a soft voice says, pulling me from my thoughts.

I look up into the sea blue eyes of my new husband. They shone brightly, love and security flashing through them.

"Just can't believe this is real," I whisper, so quietly I'm not even sure he heard me, even with his advanced hearing.

He pulls me closer, if that's possible, wrapping his arms protectively around my back.

"It is, Natasha," he murmurs into my hair, his hands gently moving up and down my back in a comforting way. "I wouldn't trade you for the world. I'll never let you go."

I bury my head into his chest, too afraid to look in his eyes any longer. There was still so much he didn't know about me, about my past.

That I was supposed to kill him all those years ago, during the war. Or that his best man, his best friend, was my trainer. Part of the reason I became the killer I am. Not that I blame him. He was under orders much like I was. 

"Might I cut in?" 

I sigh softly. I couldn't deny him, despite still being unsure of my feelings for him.

Steve kisses the top of my head before handing me over to James.

"You look stressed," he comments as he pulls me into his arms.

"Is it really that noticeable?" I question worriedly.

"Only to those paying close attention," he responds quietly. "What are you thinking about?"

"James, it's not that I don't trust you, it's just--"

"You remember."

"Everything."

He spins me out in time with the music.

"He loves you, Natasha. You love him. He doesn't care about your past. He cares about who you've become. Watching you grow has made him proud and he will always be there for you. And so will I. I owe you for everything you've done for me. Now, relax. Enjoy your evening. You can tell him everything when you're ready. He'll understand."

I look up at him through my eyelashes. He was serious. He gave me a small smile before kissing my cheek, sending me into the arms of Clint.

"You look lovely, Nat," he says with a smile.

"Thanks Barton." I smile back at him.

He doesn't say anything, but he can tell I'm stressed. I appreciate his silence, being in his arms enough to calm my raging heartbeat.

I find myself dancing with Tony next, followed by Thor and Bruce, and even Fury before finding myself back in the arms of Steve.

I think back to our vows as we hold each other, trying to believe every word spoken, by the both of us.

"Steve, you know, I always thought you were an overgrown boy scout." There was a bit of laughter at that, and even Steve chuckled, while looking mildly offended. "Your fashion sense was terrible and you were so lost when you first came out of the ice. But you never faltered, not once. You jumped right back into the fight without question, once you had a little nudge.