Eight

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I was in my studio continuing my painting. I finally finished it so I took a step back to admire my work. My throat knot when I realized what I did: bright smile on full lips, button nose, brown eyes, long black hair... I painted Navia.

I sighed and passed my hand down my face. I wanted her back so badly, but how was I supposed to do that if she wouldn't even talk to me? An object in my peripheral vision caught my attention. I turned to face the small clay sculpture, resting on the back table, that Maïa made. I grabbed it and held it in my hand. It kinda looked like the one I made, but smaller and less accurate proportions... almost cute even.

I finally understood. I just had to fake it with Maïa until Navia believed the show I was putting on. From there, I don't shout at her whenever Navia's around: sounds like a plan.

I put my supplies away and cleaned my brushes. I left my apron before getting my phone and going downstairs. I found Maïa playing with her dolls at the dining table, while mom was cooking in the kitchen. I forced a smile that she mirrored when she saw me.

"Hi big brother."

"Hey Maïa, you want to go to the park?" I asked sounding as nice as possible.

Her big dark brown eyes lit up as she nodded her head excitedly. I guess she's kinda adorable, but I still hate children. She left her dolls on the table and slid off the chair before running off to the entrance.

"That's very sweet of you Jaheem." mom said, smiling at me proudly.

"Thank you." I replied.

Now I felt a little bad because my intention behind my good action wasn't as good as the act itself. Maïa had her Bratz sandles on and was cheerfully waiting for me at the door. I slid my slides on too and we left. She ran towards the sandy playground but froze then ran back towards me.

"Big brother? Can you push me on the swings please?" she asked in that tiny voice of hers.

"Sure." I replied, holding back a groan.

She ran towards the swings and sat down on one. I stood behind her and started pushing. She squealed and giggled the more she went higher. It was a very annoying sound.

"You good on your own now?" I asked, ready to get away.

"Yes." she answered and started swinging her legs.

I smiled a little watching her. If only kids were all fun and games and not responsibilities and discipline. I stood a little in front of her and took my phone out to snap her. I added the caption "Babysitting 😻" before posting it on my story. Once Navia would see that, she'll understand that I've changed.

"I want to stop now." Maïa asked still traveling back and forth.

I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes: she literally just got on.

"Okay." I said then reached for the chains. She gradually stopped then slid off.

She ran off towards the play structure. She looked so happy and carefree, I envied her for that. I miss the days where I didn't have any problems. I miss the days where my life was just about toys and candy.

I sat on the park bench, next to some teenage girl. She was on her phone but I saw her sending a quick glance in my direction. I focused on Maïa who just went down the slide with a huge grin on her face. She was really enjoying herself with the simplest of things, not surprising as she was still just eight. I took my own phone to see if I could find anything interesting on Instagram.

"Big brother?"

I looked up to see that the little girl with dark skin tone, was now standing in front of me. I resisted the urge to sigh in annoyance.

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