Don't Say Anything

67. Accouterments Has Two Cs

"Jess?" Will answers as soon as I call him.

"Will," I try to keep my voice steady, but with the mixture of the bumpy car and my racing emotions, I'm all over the place.

"Jessi, what's wrong?" he asks before I can compose myself to say another word.

"I-I'm fine. Don't worry."

"I'm worrying. Are you safe? Are you okay?"

"Will, really. I'm okay. I just talked with my mom. I was wondering what time you got off of work?"

"Right now," he says and I hear the chair squeak in the background. I glance down at the car's clock and see that it's 6:38.

"You do not get off of work at 6:38."

"I do today."

"Will, you don't have to leave work for me. I just wanted to know when you'd be free."

I really want to be with him right now, but I don't want him rearranging his schedule for me. I'm not dying.

"I can hear that tone in your voice. Do I have to remind you how many times I've fucked up? The least I can do is be with you right now." His voice becomes muffled. "Hey, Jack. I'm leaving. I already faxed Martin the papers and Vin and I took care of the Paris convention before he left." I hear more muffled talking that's even quieter which I assume is Jack, but I can't make out what he says. "Sure, thing. I'll see you tomorrow." Then Will's voice returns to its normal volume. "The traffic is going to be a pain in the ass but I'll get there as soon as I can. Meet me at my house in about an hour?"

"Okay."

Now I'm overwhelmed by my confused emotions for my mother and by how much Will cares for me. I didn't expect him to stop what he was doing and come to my unnecessary rescue. I'm just an overreacting teenager, but Will treats me like I'm so much more than I deserve. He's still trying to make up for keeping secrets from me, but I think the running away and roller coaster situations scared him into telling me the truth from now on. The look in his eyes was so desperate; I hate just thinking about it. He looked so helpless, like he was beyond apologizing, but he didn't know what else to do. I don't want to see him like that again, and I don't think he ever wants to feel like that either.

"Okay, see you soon Rosie. Drive safe. Please," he says before hanging up in a rush. It won't take him an hour if he hurries as fast as he's talking. I don't have time to go back to the dorms, and I'm on the way to his house, so I stop at the library to kill time.

The parking lot is abnormally crowded, and I debate leaving and waiting at Will's house until he gets there. But then I could run into Leah, and I don't feel like listening to another apology yet. And God forbid I see Ethan. The packed library suddenly sounds a lot more appealing. I need some time to distract my thoughts from my mother before I talk about it to Will. I refused to get overly emotional because of her.

I find a spot at the back of the parking lot and carry in a few of the books I know I still need to study. I find a table where everyone looks like they're working independently and sit down. I'll just read for about twenty minutes and then make my way over to Will's house. I don't want to make him wait for me. I'll stay in Kira's car until he shows up if I get there early.

I'm read about a paragraph of my textbook when a distantly familiar voice surprises me.

"Jessi?"

I look up to meet eyes with Vinny. Out of all the people I thought I could run into in the library, Vinny would be at the bottom of the list. But at least he's at the top of people I don't mind talking to.